Hello, I'm JessiE, and here it is, If Only, my officially first fan fiction. Have fun reading!

This story has 5 sagas, this is Saga 2, and each saga starts with chapter   1 back again... and a fair WARNING! This story is long ... very long (to  me)!

Just a reminder that Saga 2 is very long, I think the longest saga among five. But have fun reading!

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If Only,
Saga 2,
Chapter 4,
By JessiE

(Jesse at home.)

          Look at that. Man, I haven't seen myself looking like that for ages now!

          Jesse looked at himself, smiling at the mirror. He kept staring at the mirror since the day he met Jennifer at the hospital.

          "I guess I'm very happy to see her again. You just don't know how much I've loved her since high school. It's just very good to see her again, you know?" he said to himself as he was looking at the mirror.

          There. I've gone totally crazy. Now I'm starting to talk to myself. But, maybe I'm just too happy. I feel good!

          "Maybe I miss her already."

          Actually, this is very dumb. I can't sit here all day and stare myself at the mirror. I wanna do something else.

          "Duh, but all I can think about is Jennifer!"

          Let's see... my feelings for her are useless... she has always liked Josh! They even work together. But... I wonder where he is? Maybe I can go and ask Jennifer. Or much easier, I can call someone.. like, Amanda.


          He got up and telephoned Amanda. Then he asked her about Josh.

          "Josh?" Amanda became quiet for a while. "Actually, Jesse, Josh died several days ago..." she said reluctantly.

          "He what?!" Jesse responded in shock. "How did it happen?"

          "He had an accident."

          "Oh God..." he sighed. "You're serious?"

          "I wouldn't joke around with this kind of thing."

          "But... that's very unbelievable..."

          "I know. It's a very bad thing to happen."

          "I wanna ask you about something else. When I visited Jennifer yesterday, she seemed sort of mad when I talked about you. I noticed it, but she didn't know I noticed it though. I immediately changed to a new topic. But anyway, do you know why she became like kind of mad when I mentioned your name?"

          "Well... maybe. Actually, it's a long story."

          "Tell me about it. I wanna know, desperately."

          "Fine, but I won't talk about it over the phone. Let's meet. Do you know the coffee shop near EntertainmenTeen office?"

          "Of course I do. Let's meet there."

          "But... when?"

          "How 'bout now? Can you come now?"

          "Sure. See you there."

          Therefore, they went there. When they met, Amanda told him everything, from when she and Jennifer got an interview until when Jennifer ended up in the hospital, feeling mad at her and Brian.

          After meeting Amanda, Jesse decided to go to the hospital. So he did. When he got there, he immediately went to visit Jennifer. But before he could enter her ward, he realized that there were some guys standing in front of the door of the ward next to Jennifer's ward.

          It seems as if those guys are some guards or something. Weird
, Jesse thought. He stood there for a while, looking at them. Then a very familiar guy came out of that ward and came back in after that.

          Oh, wait a minute! That's Justin Timberlake! That's odd. What's he doing here?

          Well, none of my business.


          He started going backwards without realizing it. That was when he got hit by someone. He recognized the guy. He was Brian.

          "Sorry, sorry," Brian said.

          "That's okay, Brian."

          Brian just smiled and went off.

          "Hey wait!" Jesse said. "Brian!"

          Brian turned around and came nearer to him. "What?"

          "Umm... let me start by introducing myself. I'm Jesse."

          "Okay... nice to meet you Jesse..." He shook hands with Jesse, feeling a bit awkward.

          "I think you know who Amanda is, right?"

          Brian became kind of surprised. "You know her?"

          "She's my friend. And I know Jennifer too. I met Amanda on the other day and I visited Jennifer after I met Amanda. Actually, straight to the point, I knew everything."

          "You knew everything? Everything? Huh, I don't know how many times I've heard of that word. But, anyway, you do know everything? About Josh and all that?"

          "Yup, Amanda told me when I insisted her to tell me. It's because I became curious of why Jennifer didn't look too happy when I said Amanda's name."

          "I see." He put his hands in his pockets. "Actually, I come to this hospital everyday, but I don't come here to visit Jennifer. I  come because I'm worried about Jennifer. I just wanna know her condition and how she's doing everyday. If I visit her, she'll see me and she'll immediately get mad."

          "I understand. But trust me, I'm sure things will get better."

          "I hope so."

          "Actually, I have a question. Who are those guys there in black clothes? Why do they keep standing there like guards?"

          "Those men? They are guards. They guard JC's ward."

          "JC? Whom do you mean, JC Chasez of 'N Sync?"

          "Yeah, what, you didn't know? I guess that's something Amanda didn't tell you. JC was involved in the same accident Jennifer was involved in."

          "Oh, now that explains why I see Justin just now. What a coincidence! Meeting you, JC Chasez next to Jennifer's ward..."

          "Well, life is weird at times. You wanna meet JC?"

          "Can I?"

          "Sure you can. I was just about to go there just now. Mark!" Brian drew himself nearer to one of the guards and made a short talk with him. "Jesse, come here."

           Jesse went nearer. Brian opened the door and went in, followed by Jesse.

           I must be dreaming, Jesse thought. Look at JC's condition. He doesn't seem too good, but Jennifer's condition is worse.

           "Hey Justin, do you mind? My friend would like to pay JC a visit right now."

           "Oh, well, why not."

           "JC, how are you doing? Anyway, this is my friend, Amanda and Jennifer's friend too, Jesse."

           "Hey there," Jesse addressed.

           "Hi. You knew Jennifer?"

           "For a long time, yeah."

           "That's nice. Hey, do you know what's happening in her life nowadays? Things like, his friend's death?"

           "Do you mean, Josh?" Jesse looked at Brian.

           "Oh, I told JC everything. I kinda visit him a lot, so I told him everything when I kinda get bored. I don't have much to do every day. I'm in my holidays. When I told JC, he'd tell it to Justin, Justin would tell it to Joey, Lance and Chris," Brian stated.

           That's nice. From Amanda to me... from Brian to JC, from JC to Justin, from Justin to his other pals...

           "I knew everything. I kinda pitty Jennifer... we have become friends though. So I guess you do know everything?" JC said.

           "I do," Jesse responded.

           "You know, Jesse, if you're  a close friend, then just try to advise her stop being mad at Brian and Amanda."

           Brian looked at JC. "That's not necessary."

           "You're being too kind, JC," Justin said. JC gave him a shut-up look but said nothing as a response.

           "Come on, Jesse. I just think it's not good to be mad at anyone. Especially Jennifer... it might be bad for her health
emotionally and mentally," JC said.

           "I'll try." Jesse looked at Brian. "Hey, don't look too surprised. I'm trying to help you."

           "If you want to do that, I would be grateful though. Thanks."

           "Okay, I'm going to Jennifer's ward. I guess I'll see you all later. I hope you'll recover very soon, JC."

           "Thanks. Come again if you like."

            Jesse smiled. He turned around and got out of the ward.





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