Chapter Two
Chapter Two
The months passed filled with every sort of training for Orlando. At first he had found the rigorous schedule of horse training, archery, rehearsals, and boating exhausting. But this was the part of his job he loved the most. And then, after what seemed like a lifetime, everyone was ready to start filming, and Orlando's training was ready to be put to the test.
When the day came to start, his first couple of scenes involved him speaking the Elven language. He arrived in the costume department early, ready to be dressed for the first time - of many - as the immortal and legendary, Legolas of Mirkwood. He was then taken to make up.
To meet Kerryn. Kerryn was the 'delightful' woman who did his make up. Her constant yanking of Orlando's head and hair - what small amount he had left after a rather radical, but comparatively wig-friendly haircut - was constantly punctuated by Kerryn's babble about how she wasn't happy with her wage and how she intended to leave, leaving her 'inept' assistant to take over. Orlando found it hard to concentrate on what the woman was saying. She had been on like this for weeks now. She was rough, yanking his face around and pulling his ears, and he quite regularly heard his neck crack while in her 'care.' He silently hoped she would hurry up and leave.
He had been pulled out of bed at 5 AM, an ungodly hour to him and dragged onto the set for his first day as Legolas. After being up half the night learning his lines - half of which still made no sense to him, he was feeling more than a little anxious. At first he just nodded and pretended to listen to her complaining, but after a sharp smack to the ear from Kerryn, who told him to 'sit still, stop making my job harder', he resigned himself to complete and utter hibernation.
*
That night, after working on his feet the entire day, re-shooting the same scene painstakingly from a million angles, with a million different cameras, saying the same lines enough times to feel they were tattooed to his brain, Orli finally fell into bed with his prosthetic ears still on. He was exhausted. He had lines buzzing around his head, a cacophony of noises and director's commands. But none the less, he was satisfied. Somehow he knew this was the job that would change his life!
*
He dragged himself into make up one morning a week later, and sat down and prepared himself for the painful process of becoming Legolas. He looked to his left and saw that Billy Boyd was still there.
"What are you still here for?" He asked, looking up at Billy who was standing, gripping a hand-made railing on the ceiling of the bus. "Aren't you meant to be with the other Hobbits?"
"Slept in. Now she can't find the right type of glue." He laughed. He kicked out, and the Hobbit foot flipped off. It flew across the room and landed with a wet squelch near the door.
They both burst out laughing.
"Can you get it for me? I'm not allowed to move until the other foot sets." Billy asked, stifling his laughter.
Orlando got up, stumbling with the giggles, and started towards the foot. But before he could get it, a woman stepped into the caravan with Kerryn behind her. She had her head turned away, talking to Kerryn, and he moved to stop her. But before he could utter a warning, she slipped on the foot, and fell backwards towards the door. Kerryn was knocked backwards, down the short flight of stairs, to the ground. The woman caught herself on the doorframe, frozen in the moment, saving herself from a similar fall. She turned and looked down at her.
"Oh god�" They ran down the four or so stairs, with Billy hopping after them, his other foot beginning to dislodge itself.
Kerryn was sitting up with a dazed look on her face. But aside from being a bit shocked, there seemed to be nothing else wrong with her.
"I've had it! This is the end! I have had more than enough of early mornings, chicken-feed pay, and unco-operative colleagues! I give up!�" She continued to rant loudly, making a list of everything that she disliked about the set and various cast and crew who had gathered to witness the spectacle. No one helped her for a moment. They were too busy trying not to laugh�
After taking a moment to compose himself, and shove the offending foot into the hand of Billy, Orlando pulled Kerryn to her feet, but she dropped down again, wailing about her ankle.
He turned to the other woman, "I think her ankle is-"
He stopped dead. He gaped. She gaped and stared right back.
"It's you!" They both said at the same time.
"What are you doing here?!" He asked.
"Me?! What about you?!" She exclaimed.
A loud and menacing groan brought them back to the present. They looked down at the injured woman.
"We'd better-"
"Yeah, I'll take her left side." She said, moving around to lift the woman to her good foot. He followed her lead and got under Kerryn's right arm.
Lou called back to Billy. "You wait inside. If I come back and see you've gotten your feet dirty, Billy, I'll kill you. We won't be long."
"Um�.right." Billy said, waving at Lou with his Hobbit foot. He turned and went inside.
"What happened?" Lou asked, as they neared the first aid room.
"Billy accidentally kicked his Hobbit foot off. You slipped on it." He replied.
"What the hell have you two done to my make up artist?!" They heard a loud, male voice booming. They turned and saw two men coming out of a building and hurrying towards them.
"She fell out of the make up unit, Mr Perez." Lou told them.
"Fell out�.how the hell do you fall out of a building?!" He snapped back at her.
"It wasn't her fault! She slipped on a prosthetic foot and fell backwards. Kerryn was standing behind Lou. And by the way," Orli said, trying to stand up straight under Kerryn's lagging weight "falling out of a building is not that difficult." He was glowering at the man, while Lou was almost choking.
Does he have any idea who he was talking to? She thought.
The man had turned his attention to Orlando, but instead of anger, he was calm and serious. He and the other man took Kerryn away.
"Louise, would you finish doing Mr Boyd and Mr Bloom's make up. They'll be needed on set soon." The other man called back. She frowned at him as he left.
"What did he mean? Who is Mr Bloom?" She asked Orlando as they walked back to the make up unit.
"I am."
"What? Why do you need make up?" She asked.
"Because I'm Legolas." He bowed slightly and grinned like a fool.
She stopped walking and stared at him. "You�you're one of the actors?!" She stammered.
He nodded. "And let me guess, you must be one of the make up people. No doubt, Kerryn's assistant."
She nodded mutely. "I must have missed you so many times. I've been here for weeks, doing Billy and Dominic's make up. I knew that Kerryn was doing Legolas, but I always finish the Hobbits before you even get in. I knew someone called Orlando was playing Legolas�but I never actually put two and two together. We must have been missing each other by about half an hour every morning!"
"Wow, this is like Sliding doors. You know the bit where she opens the door and he's just standing there?" He said, enthusiastically.
"I never saw that movie. So are you really an actor? What else have you been in? I've never seen you before. Well, except for the plane of course."
"Well this is really my first big thing. I was in an episode of Midsummer murders and I was - what was that my sister called it�ah, a 'butt monkey' in the movie Wilde. That's about it."
Lou's mind was reeling. If only she had kept in touch with him! Her mind floated back to the napkin with her name and number on it, and she imagined it in a rubbish tip somewhere, half decayed and smudged beyond recognition.
"What did you mean before, when you said it was easy to fall out of a building?"
"Oh�Well once I was trying to get onto a friends roof and I slipped and fell. I woke up in hospital and the doctors said I would never walk again, but a few weeks later I walked out on crutches!" He finished triumphantly.
"How far did you fall?" She asked.
"About three stories."
Her eyebrows shot up. "Wow. What were you doing up trying to get onto a roof?"
Orli just smiled ruefully and tapped the side of his nose.
They arrived at the make up unit. She sat him down and went to finish Billy's feet. Orli listened to them chatter together for a while.
"You two knew each other, did you?" Billy asked Orlando.
"Yeah, we met on the plane here."
"But I had no idea that he was here. And he had no idea I was here." Lou said happily.
"Well, you should have paid more attention to me when I was speaking. Dominic and I are always telling you about our make up artist. 'she's so funny, she's so pretty." He mimicked himself. "I always thought you'd like her and I was always at you to meet her." He continued.
"Yeah, I did listen. I just never found the time to come and meet her." Orlando replied.
"Well I bet you wish you had-"
"That's you done Billy!" She smiled at Billy quickly, happy to not let him finish his sentence. She felt her cheeks growing pink, sensing Orlando was staring at her. "I'll probably see you on set if Kerryn can't come. If not then tomorrow." Lou said loudly. She turned to Orlando. "Now. Your turn." She said holding up a pair of scissors, menacingly.
They both burst out laughing.
They talked while she did his ears and wig. He was amazed that it was possible to have it done so gently. He said so and received a blank look. "Never mind. Kerryn was always so rough. She used to wrench my head around and try to break my neck. Viggo and I used to have competitions to see who was in the most pain after having a session with Kerryn. I won. But I still don't understand why she was always so rough with me." He said.
She laughed. "Because she didn't like you."
"What? Why?" He asked, pouting.
"Well, she said you ruined an Aragorn wig." She was smiling.
"That is a direct lie! We had a scuffle, nothing more. And I didn't ruin it. I just tore it a bit. He called me a prissy Elf! Well�I guess he only did it because I called him human scum, but that's not the point!"
She stared at him for a moment, trying to work out if he was serious. Then they both burst out laughing and only calmed down when the make up supervisor showed up to tell her that she was needed to replace Kerryn on the set.
"Ok. Thanks. We shouldn't take much longer." She said to the man, still smiling.
The man hesitated, then shook his head and left, grumbling about 'kids these days'.
***