CONGRATULATIONS!!!
Ultimate Word Play King: NIBB
Disclaimer: I claim no ownership of anything
associated with Farscape or it’s parent companies. The FNS appears by
permission of it’s creator and owner LeatherGirl. I promise to return it in the
condition in which I found it… Possibly minus a couple flasks of Reslac.;)
Rating: PG-13
Setting:
It’s the evening before LeatherGirl announces the winners of The Fellip
Nectar Stand Word Play Challenge and the stand is bustling with patrons. Music
is playing in the background and the four-armed waitress is scurrying about,
delivering drinks to various beings around the bar-room. Seated at their
regular booth are the crews of Moya and Talyn, enjoying a little down-time
between episodes. Outside the stand, Moya(with Pilot) and Talyn(solo) are doing
a little free-flying in their crews’ absence. NIBB stumbles in, through the
doorway of the UT pub, with a frantic look on his face and he’s clutching a few
pieces of paper and a writing implement.
[Over at
the booth, both crews are laughing at something D’Argo just finished saying…]
John M: “
D’Argo: [Whose already had a few…] “I acclept yer
shalenge John…
John T and M: ” WHOA! D…“ [Both look at each other and then speak separately…]
John M: “Thank God this isn’t a ‘Scorpy’s Kids’
telethon, or else the sensors would be goin’ nuts!
John T: “Yeah,
Rygel: “What the frell was “slugs” supposed to
maen?!” [Rygel’s question goes unanswered…]
Jool: [Remarks to Aeryn..] “I can’t believe
it…They finally *agreed* on something. Did you ever think they would?”
Aeryn: “Never.”
D’Argo; “Wha-did I shay?” [The whole group laughs
at the perplexed look on D’Argo’s face… As the laughter dies-down…]
Aeryn: “
[Instead of trying to repeat Aeryn’s words, D’Argo
and the others
begin to
laugh again. All realizing that the joke is now on Rygel, who looks around the
booth grumpily. All the laughter draws NIBB’s attention and he rushes over to
the booth… ]
NIBB: “Man, am I glad to see you guys!” [NIBB
states, in a near panic as the laughter begins to die-down again… Everyone at
the booth greets NIBB warmly…]
Rygel: [Mutters under his breath…] “You’d think
any *normal* Scaper would be *happy* seeing us once a weeken, but noOOoo… THIS one
has to bother us while we’re TRYING to relax.”
Stark: [Overhears Rygel’s comment… As if Rygel
were a misbehaving child, Stark whispers…] “Rygel! Don’t you have some Modjules
that you could shove into your face to stop you from making rude remarks?!”
Rygel: [Whispers back, sarcastically…] “No, as a
matter of fact I don’t…
[Chiana gets up from her seat, moves to stand next
to NIBB and puts her arms around his neck. She pears at him, at arms length,
tilting her head from side to side and smiling mischievously…]
Chiana: “Ignore the slug… So, what brings you to
the FNS strranger? [Chiana giggles.]
NIBB: “Hey Chi.” [NIBB smiles back, momentarily
distracted…]
***
[Meanwhile, at the bar’’’]
Rygel:
“One large plate of Hynerian Modjules… And do you have anything that could
ah…” [Rygel’s voice trails off as he whipers something into the bartenders
ear…]
***
[Back at the booth…]
NIBB: [Remembering why he came to the FNS…]“Please
I, I need your help, all of you.”
John T: “Our booth is your booth… no matter WHAT
frog-boy says...”
John M: “Have a seat dude.”
Crais: “What is the problem NIBB?”
Chiana: [Directs the panicky Scaper to sit and
takes a seat beside him… close, beside him with her arms still around his neck.
] “Yeah, tell us what’s goin’ on. I’m sure we can help. “
D’Argo: “Shiana, I’m sure ^THAS* not helping the
situation ad all.”
Chiana: “Maybe it’s not helping YOUR situation
D’Argo, … [Chiana giggles and looks NIBB in the eyes as she says…] but maybe
it’s helping… ours.”
[NIBB, again, forgets the reason he came to the
FNS…]
D’Argo: “Efry frewlling pwanet…” [He then downs
the flask of Reslac in front of him and promptly passes out, snoring, with his
face on the table…]
Chiana: [Notices D’Argo’s condition, giggles again
and turns her attention back to NIBB…]
“Now that *he’s* out of the way…”
Jool: “Excuse me, Chiana dear? Maybe if you let
him have a little air he would be able to tell us what he needs our help with?”
John M: “Yeah, Pip. I hate to agree with the
hair-ball, [ Jool harumfs in the background.] but I think NIBB was tryin’ to
say somethin.”
NIBB: ”Oh, yeah… Thanks for the a… attention Chi,
but I have a little favor to ask of you all. “
Chiana: [Smiles slyly, not letting NIBB free just
yet…]
“I helped
though, didn’t I.”
NIBB: “Actually, yes. I feel much… better. Thank
you Chiana…. for a…” [Chiana draws NIBB’s thoughts elsewhere once again..]
John T: “Okay, you kids can feel free to go get a
room later…For now, let’s get down to business.”
[As Chiana relegates herself to sitting next to
NIBB, NIBB explains the FNS Word Play Challenge contest to the crews at the
booth and they agree to help him write a ficlet to try to win the trophy…
Meanwhile: Rygel plans his revenge for being treated poorly by the crew, yet
again…]
NIBB: “I found this great new drink, sort of,
stuff… It should be able to help us pull off an old-fashioned all-nighter. I
found some here awhile ago and brought it to a party on the BB… Great stuff!”
[NIBB orders up a round of ‘Blue Goo’ and explains what it is and how it works
while the crew helps with the ficlet…]
Stark: “It’s the contest, the contest, the
CONTEST!”
Aeryn: “Oh frell. Stark, you’re not going to start
that again are you?”
Stark: “Just trying to the help, trying to help
NIBB.”
Jool: “Maybe you’d better just keep quiet while
*we* help him Stark.”
D’Argo:”
*The following is a BB post taken form the party
where ‘Blue Goo‘ was first used…*
|
|
***
OK, what IS 'Blue Goo' ?
During a visit to my favorite UT bar, where I found the 'Goo',
I saw Rygel and asked him about it. He was the one
who translated the label for me, but I had to give him a pocket-load of 'free
flask' tokens for the info!
Chiana was the one who knew what the 'Blue Goo' was for... She told me that
it's a highly hallucinogenic drink/additive that is very hard to come by in the
UTs, thereby making it very special and sought-after. Chiana explained that it
is VERY IMPORTANT, when consuming 'Blue Goo', to *believe* that it's a 'drink'
for it to 'work it's magic'. [This is where the "many uses" comes
in.]
The 'Goo' can't harm you in any way and is not
addictive. BUT, for instance, if you *believe* it's 'floor cleaner' or 'dye'
etc., *that* IS what it will be for you. As long as you *believe* that's what
it is. Pip said to make sure you *know* what you want it to *be* BEFORE you use
it. That way you won't end up with a drink that tastes like floor cleaner. :)
It can't change into anything, but it *is* a 'uni-liquid'. Apparently, it was
engineered to work with a being's thoughts to enhance the 'party experience’.
The other uses were discovered when a few "non-believers" tried
some.:) The 'Blue Goo' also reproduces as needed, so a party can never run out
of it. Strangely though, Chiana said that the 'Goo' is definitely *not" a
living thing, but is totally natural. Go figure!:)
I hope that you all enjoy it!:) Question is...Did
I take a sip of the stuff before or after telling you about it?;)
Disclaimer: "Blue Goo" is a "Uni-Liquid" imported and
distributed by "NIBB-fizz" a division of NIBB inc. all rights
reserved.;)
***
*The Scapers at the party also decided that the
‘Goo’ could be used as a teleportation tonic, but where it teleports you is
still unknown.*
Crais: “Am I understanding you correctly?… We are
supposed to drink this ‘Goo’ and it will help us to concentrate more
effectively?”
John M: “You heard the man Captain corn-ball… You
gotta *believe*.’
John T: [Nods his head in agreement…] “Yup.”
Jool: [Looking to Aeryn…] “Again?…”
Aeryn: “Two Johns agree twice in one day?…This
can’t be good.”
Jool: “Well, I for one am *not* going to
drink…*that*. I’ll stay with Reslac, thank you.”
Chiana: “C’mon Jool, live a little.” [Chiana downs
a flask of ‘Blue Goo’ as does NIBB, Crais, the two Crichtons, Stark and Aeryn…
They all down their ‘Blue Goo’ with a toast to the FNS…]
Stark: “Yummy!… Oooooh”
Aeryn: “I don’t get what the big deal is… ooof.”
Johns M and T: “ Wooo-hooo!” [They look at each
other and hi-five.]
NIBB: “Wooo! Aurora Barstool, eat your heart out!”
Chiana: “Now *this* is a drink!
D’Argo: “
Crais. “Wah, strong stuff! …Can we do something
about the Luxan? There’s a growing puddle of drool headed across the table
towards me!”
Stark: “Or is that the “Gooooo’ talking?
[At that moment Rygel returns to the booth
carrying a small vile…]
Rygel: “What the yotz is wrong with all of you?”
Jool: “What’s that you’ve got there Rygel?” [She
takes the small vile from Rygels grasp before he can protest…] This is ‘’Blue Goo’, isn’t it? …We already
know what it is you know.”
Rygel: “You mean NIBB told you?…Yotz! By the ears
of a Hynerian yak, YOTZ!!”
Jool: [Feeling left out, downs the flasks contents
in one gulp…]
“What the frell, right?…I’ll be lucky if it
doesn’t make all my hair fall out.” [Jool’s mouth drops open as she realizes
her mistake…]
Rygel: [His mood suddenly brightening…] “What did
you just say?
Jool: [Looks around her and sees hair everywhere
and then feels the smoothness of the top of her head…] ”
[Rygel quickly pulls some Fluffables out of his
robe pocket, stuffs them into this ears and snickers. The screams go un-noticed
by the ‘Goo’-affected. The rest of the stand’s patrons clear out as Rygel
retreats to the bar to take advantage of the bartenders absence…]
D’Argo: “
Crais: [With his hands pressed over his ears…]
“Someone?! … A towel?!… Please?!”
-end-