This is the page where i bring you all my views on the Top / Bottom 9's of the week
I love democracy? Don't you?
I know on the surface of it that the attempted robbery of my house may not seem that much on the greater scheme of things, but to me it's a fucking nightmare!
It was about half one in the morning on Tuesday when i heard someone / something climbing over the fence in my back garden, so, being the athletic person i am (chort) i sprung from my bed, threw on a t-shirt (i was wearing pant's too, don't worry) and proceeded to leg it out onto the corridor and down the stairs to see what was going on.
After pathetically spanking down the first flight of stairs, i re-composed myself and headed down the second set of stairs, into the lounge and out the backdoor. Only to find whoever / whatever was in the garden had obviously scarpered.
Now, to anyone who says to me "Oh it was probably a cat", i say BOLLOCKS. I didn't know cats wear large shoes that can be heard on paving slabs and also scrape a fence whilst being climbed over. bastards.
About an hour later, i leave the house to post a letter just up the road when i spot three guys sitting accross the road in a blue Ford Escort cabrio (with, and i kid you not, 3-spokes....) staring at the house. They also fitted the description of the guys seen earlier. I begin to walk in their direction, but they spot me and zoom off up the road.
Now, i know this may not sound like much, but this has made me really fucking paranoid! Although we've had a few cars nicked from our driveway before, this is different. To me, there are people watching what i do and waiting for an oppertune moment to break in a pilfer the house of all it's valuables. and that really does scare me!
I'm now setting the alarm whenever i leave the house (even if it's just to post a letter) and keeping most of the windows shut to keep any of those fuckers out; even in this weather!
The thing is though, i'm not willing to take the chance that someone is possibly planning a raid on the sanctury which is my home. Although rest assured, if they break in and i'm in the house, i guaratee that Tony Martin bloke will pale into comparison when i get through with them...
You see, according to one person, i ruined the previous month's Blackpool trip. Not only that, i turn people 'uncool' if they hang around with me. Now this is water of a ducks back to me, i can take this sort of 'insult'. What i can't stand however (even more than 3-spokes, Ravers and Vauxhal Novas put together) is someone trying to be all nice and chummy with you and saying this kind of thing behind my back or to a select bunch of 'friends'.
HOW FUCKING DARE YOU. YOU'VE GOT SOMETHING TO SAY, YOU SAY IT TO MY FACE. YOU DON'T LIKE THE WAY I'VE WRITTEN THIS? COME TO ME WITH YOUR GRIEVENCES AND HAVE SOME BACKBONE.
And you have the nerve to e-mail me saying 'You don't know what you've done wrong'?? READ THE TOP PARAGRAPH OF THE MAIL I SENT YOU, AND READ IT FUCKING CAREFULLY, AND TELL ME WHAT YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND ABOUT IT? CLEAR?
AND STILL, MY QUESTION TO YOU (YES, YOU ***) REMAINS: HOW DID I RUIN BLACKPOOL?
If you can't answer that simple question, you better have a damn good explanation of why you said it.
Oh and please do have a major strop about this. Please go off on one of your tantrums becuase i'll welcome it with open arms. Perhaps maybe you'll realise how you've offended so many people with your constant bitching and back-biting. Is it any wonder i could never trust a single word you say??
I would apologise for this, but it's no more than i deserve in this case. I had to deal with faux-friends for 8 long years in middle and secodary school. Not anymore. The line must be drawn.
* = I've not named this person not through cowardness or wanting to be sneaky, but to leave this person with a little more dignity then they deserve amongst friends. This is between myself and this person only and i feel it would be really quite low (chort..) to go and name them on the site. I do have standards you know.