Just kidding. That is what you came for, isn't it? I do not want to disappoint you. Heh heh, here is what you came for..
The Story
Well, it all begins in 1912. Frank Carlson, my associate, entered my life the day before the big tragedy. We were to meet in the Gym, and
he had the audacity to arrive 5 minutes late!! Glory be, that got me steamed! But we didn't get off on the wrong foot about that.
I told him the facts about the bad guys...Zeitel and his men. They had stolen various valuables, such as a painting and the Rubaiyat,
a famous book of poetry by the Persian Omar Khayyam. Hm! Poetry. Persians!
Anyway, he wasn't the best agent- he was slow and a bit of a wuss. But soon enough I whipped him into shape, and he got into it. Sure
he got shot by the Serbian stowaway Vlad Demonic, and after that got roughed up by him with a metal pipe, but he surmounted all that
to kick Zeitel's butt.
Sasha Barbicon was another story. What a ridiculous character, an even sadder soul than Frank Carlson himself! Having an affair with a
married woman- the shame! There is truly no honour in that!
Anyway, Frank and Zeitel finally got to know each other a bit. You know, the usual good versus evil thing- Frank wanders into Zeitel's
cabin, Zeitel comes back and finds him..and before you know it, Frank has to find some way to stop the bomb Zeitel planted from
going off. You know, the usual.
Then, here comes that fated iceberg. All chaos breaks loose, etc. I am on my way of getting out, looking for Frank to show up and tell me
he's got all the stolen items recovered and that he will be getting off with me. Wrong! He still has not gotten the Rubaiyat from Zeitel!
What a total loser, I thought. And the mission's a bust.
I was on board the Carpathia a while later, thinking about the past events when Frank Carlson shows up, with all the items in his
possession. Well, I was relieved. The items were safe! I would keep my job! Oh yeah, and that Frank survived as well.
That is the whole story as I remember it, in the shortest version I can manage.
