(We see William Regal sharing a few jokes with the XWA production staff.)

Regal: Well, you know, it wasn't really that difficult at all. His yard indeed, I've never heard such rubbish.

Are we almost ready?

(William walks across to the XWA interview area and looks straight into the camera.)

Regal: So, this week's RAW sees me face The Undertaker, the European Champion Christian and that cretin Crush.

You know, I would have thought that Crush had suffered enough the last time...I didn't need to use the knuckle duster, but I had to do something to give his ludicrous finishing move some credibility. The Cranium Crush indeed, why it's hardly the most devestating and lethal finisher is it. It's hardly likely to have worried Lou Thesz or a great British wrestler like Marc "Rollerball" Rocco. If Crush had applied that move to them they would have looked up and said "What the bloody hell are you doing you steaming great pile of manure!" and that's if they were feeling generous. The more likely conclusion would have been that the match would have been stopped due to a bought of laughter. The days of comic gimmicks are over Crush, let's just remind everyone what you look like again shall we...

...oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. You look like something that the bloody cat dragged home man. You look like a damned homeless peasant who can't even afford a decent pair of scissors...just bloody look at thay haircut, all messy and almost girl like. Not atall smart like mine.

I've watched as Crush has turned into a right moody little crybaby recently, but not nearly as moody as The Undertaker. You know, there was a time when that man was actually feared in the WWF...once again during a time of comic gimmicks and ludicrous angles. Evil Undertaker..."what's in the urn mummy"..."ooh, he has a brother and he burned him"...WHAT UTTER BLOODY DRIVEL??? I mean, who the bloody hell thinks up this garbage? Let's look at a quick image shall we...

...and some fans actually want the return of that character. Here we see The Undertaker, mister oh so scarey deadman, before he wrestled that other miserable fool, Hulk Hogan. Fair enough, he actually does look a little scarey but The Undertaker today is just a miserable bloody shitehawk. "This is my yard!" "You will respect me!" I don't bloody think so sunshine, you step in the ring with me and you'll have to respect me or you'll find yourself beaten to a bloody pulp and left looking like something a cat would cough up.

Now, this leaves only Christian...the XWA European Champion. Now, we all know he is only holding that title because he's yet to face me. Hell, I'm surprised the whole roster isn't trying to do me in as when I get that title it'll be the last any of the miserable fools around here see of it, they'll have no chance of getting near the damned thing. Does Christian really think the people of Bulgaria are proud of a crying ninny like him? Well, I'll tell you...they bloody well are not! The people of Europe want a Champion with some dignity, some class and stiff upper lip...not...not...not some DAMN Canadian crybaby. I mean, have you seen him throwing his little temper tantrums? "Oh, ooops, there goes our rattle!" "Does baby want his dummy back?" "Nanny, nanny, I've pooped my pants!" He looks like a flaming little school girl, the stupid bastard.

I've watched him recently though, he claims I bug him. Well, he should be so bloody lucky that it's all I do to him. He wants to talk about my English accent etc, well it'll be a good old fashioned Blackpool style beating that I'll be giving that miserable arse. He'll never know what's coming, he'll probably come backstage to sort out the match spot by spot...what utter lunacy. The boy is a damned bloody Cruiserweight anyway, how can he possibly think he'll survive in the ring with me? I'll bloody cripple you Christian...you'll be wishing you were in Rome when the Christians were lucky they only had to contend with a ferocious lion.

(Regal pauses, looks at his feet and then looks into the camera again.)

Regal: RAW will see three men destroyed and left looking like someone went at them with a machette...just you bloody well watch, it's going to put you right off your dinner. But for now, I shall bid all you viewers fairwell. Goodbye!