What if Dave was in the Buff?
(Parody of "What If God was One of Us?" by Joan Osborne)
New Lyrics by Crazy Carl
What if Dave was in the buff?
Runnin' round and showin' his stuff?
What a site that would make
Just Dave and his pet snake
If Dave were naked, what would he do?
Would he run around feeling the wind?
Or would he just plain screw?
He would enjoy the air on his ass so bare
And we sing in his glory...
"Ya ya Dave would masturbate"
"Ya ya Dave would fornicate"
"Ya, ya, ya, ya, ya"
What if Dave was in the buff?
Runnin' round and showin his stuff?
Man, he must have it so rough
It's so cold and he's got no clothes!
Now you're askin' me, what is he on?
Exactly how many times did he use that there bong?
What would drive a guy to such indecency?
And we all sing to Dave's total nudity...
"Ya ya Dave showin' his snake"
"Ya ya Dave must be baked"
"Ya, ya, ya, ya, ya "
What if Dave was in the buff?
Runnin' round and showin his stuff
Thinks he so damn tough
And then he plays with his damn bone!
And he oh so likes to play with his bone
Dammit Dave put on some warm clothes NOW!
Or I'll tell your mom at home
Copyright Tyler Saunders (2000)