Come on Aff-Aff, (Affarell: daddy...?) we're going to the beach, grab a couple of toys, let dada strap you in the car seat. And where's mama? Oh, she's taking a little nap in the trunk, whew that smell, dada must a runned over a skunk. (Affarell: "humph")
Now I know what you're thinking, it's kind a late to go swimming, but you know your mama, she's one of those type of women that do crazy things. And if she don't get her way, she'll throw a fit. Don't play with dada's toy knife son, let go of it. (Affarell: "no")
You looks so upset, why you actin' bashful, don't you wanna help dada to build a sandcastle? And mama said she want to show you how far she can float. And don't worry about that little boo-boo on her throat (Affarell: "mama�), it's just a little scratch, it don't hurt. Her was eating dinner when you were sweeping, and spilled ketchup on her shirt. Mama's messy isn't she? Well, we'll let her wash it off on the water and me and you can pway by ourselves, can't we? (Affarell: "hey..")
See son, there's a place called heaven and a place called hell. Place called prison and a place called jail. And dada probably on his way to all of 'em, except one, cause mama had a new husband and a stepson. And you don't want a new brother d'ya? (Affarell: "huh�?") Maybe if you're old enough to understand a little better, I'll explain it to ya.
But for now we'll just say "Mama was real real bad, she was being mean to dad, and made him real real mad". (Affarell: "hhh�")
I still feel sorry that I put her on time out. Sit back in your chair son, quit trying to climb out (Affarell: "waahhh� mommy� �crying). I've told you it's okay Aff-Aff. Want a night-night? Nan-a-boo? Goo goo ga ga? Her make a goo-goo ca-ca? Dada change your diadee. Clean the baby up so she can take a nighty-nighty. Your dad'll wake her up as soon as we get to the water. We're Dr. Jeckyll and Mr. Hyde�. Me and my son.
Wake up sweepy head, we're here, before we pway, we're going to take mommy for a wittle walk along the pier. Affarell don't cry son, don't get the wrong idea. Mommy's too sweepy to hear you screaming on her ear (Affarell: "mommy� mommy�). That's why you can't make her to wake (Affarell: "maaa�."), but don't worry, dada's already made a nice bed for her at the bottom of the lake. Here, want to help dada to tie this rope around this rock?
(Affarell: "yeah�!) We'll tie it to her footsie and roll her off the dock. Ready now?
(Affarell: "uh-huh") Here we go, on the count of free�! One�, two�, free. Wheeeeeee�. (Sound of the water splashing)
There goes mama spwashing in the wa-ta, no more fighting wit dad, no more restraining order. No more step dada, no more new brother. Blow her kisses bye-bye, tell mommy you love her. (Affarell: "whiii� mommy�). Now we're going to the sand (Affarell: "yeah"). Before we pway castle and junk, help dada for two more things out the trunk.
Just the two us, and when we ride�.! Just the two of us, just you and I�!
Nobody can take you for me son, even your mommy (Affarell: "hey"). Dada will always here for you. If you want anything� just ASK! Dada will be here right beside you. I love you son. And I love your mama too (Affarell: "maaamaa�"), but like I said, she was very mean to dad. Here, give dada big kisses� (Affarell: "hey� mmmh"). I love you son, I love you.

By. Addin

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