Spike walked in the backdoor of the Magic Box, carefully carrying Xander inside. Xander hadn't spoken since leaving the others, and Spike wasn't sure if it was something to worry about or not. He'd focused and brought only happy or soothing thoughts, feelings or memories to his mind, hoping to help calm Xander. It seemed to have worked, but Spike couldn't be sure.
Spike sat Xander down on one of the sofas in the training room and made to leave. When he went to stand, he couldn't. Xander had a death grip on his duster, and refused to let go.
"Xan, I'm just going to get you some water. I'll be right back." Spike assured him, and moved to stand again.
Xander whimpered slightly, tightening his hold on Spike and burying his head in the vampire's chest.
"Ok. I won't go anywhere. I'll stay right here. I won't leave you." Spike promised, holding Xander tightly to him. Silently, Spike held Xander, rocking him gently.
A few minutes later everyone, except Angel, Buffy and Gunn, entered the shop. Spike only spared them a glance before refocusing his attention on Xander.
"How is he doing?" Giles asked, kneeling down beside them.
"He's alright. Just a little shaken up." Spike told him, though he really wasn't sure if that were true or not.
"Well, we'll just be in the other room. We'll discuss what we've found and our thoughts on everything after Angel and the others get back." Giles said, patting Xander's head affectionately, being sure to have calming thoughts, and smiled reassuringly at Spike. He then followed the others into the main shop to wait for Angel, Buffy and Gunn's return.
"Spike?" Xander's small voice broke the silence that had fallen after Giles departure. It startled Spike, who hadn't expected for Xander to even be awake.
"Yeah, pet?"
"Thank you, again." Xander said simply, not relinquishing his hold on the bleached vampire.
"Nothing to thank me for. You already know I care. I wouldn't have left you to deal with everything alone. You know that, too." Spike said, a little laughter in his voice.
"That's what I'm thanking you for. For caring. No one else ever seemed to care. I'm glad that you do." Xander said, his voice low, far away sounding as he drifted in his doze.
"I'm glad you're glad." Spike said, chuckling. "Would care regardless."
"I know." Xander said, tilting his head a little to look at Spike. "You know I care, too, right? Because I do. Just�everything is so confused up here, ya know?" Xander said, tapping the side of his head with an index finger. "I'm just not sure right now, how much of it's me, and how much of it's you."
"I know, Xander, and I understand that. I have an eternity. There's no need to rush anything. We can wait to figure it out, until after you�WE get this all sorted, figure out how to either stop this or control it." Spike said, smiling down at Xander.
Xander returned the smile, before snuggling back down into Spike's chest. He liked it there. He felt safe there, and the feelings of love and protectiveness he was getting from the vampire were quickly dispelling any residual effects of the vamps that had attacked him.
"Spike?" Xander furrowed his brow, thinking. "I think I figured something out."
Spike raised an eyebrow and looked down at the top of Xander's head. "And what's that, pet?"
Xander thought for a moment, trying to focus on his own feelings and thoughts, separate them from Spike's. "Well, yesterday, while I was out. I felt you, and saw everything that you remember, even though you weren't thinking about them. But I only see what you're thinking about and feeling at the moment, now. And I never felt Buffy, or Cordelia, or the others when I touched them. I think, that if I'm focusing on IT, then it works. And at the time, I was focused on you, so I felt all that, and I felt Riley, because I was focused on him, since I had tried to kill him with the table. Does any of that make sense to you?" Xander asked, looking up at Spike.
"Yeah, pet, I think I get it. Why don't we wait a bit and discuss this with Angel and the Watchers. Angel and the others should be back soon." Spike told him, squeezing him gently for a moment.
"Where are Buffy and Angel anyway?" Xander asked, having been a little out of it when they'd left them.
"Well, since I was more worried about you at the time, Angel, Buffy, and his little friend, Gunn, decided that they'd handle a little of my business for me." Spike explained, smirking a little.
Xander laughed lightly at the image he was getting in his mind.
~*~
"Was all that really necessary?" Buffy asked, for the third time, in the block and a half walk back to the Magic Box. She ignored Gunn's snort from behind her and Angel.
"There are certain�things," Angel said, waiving his hands around, unable to word exactly what he meant, "an�etiquette of sorts that all vampires follow. Especially masters. Minions, they're just cannon fodder. But Masters, there're procedures that have to be followed. If another vampire messes with someone or something that you've layed a claim to, it's like, stealing, or assaulting one's spouse or family member. Spike has verbally claimed Xander as his. It doesn't matter that Xander hasn't reciprocated the claim, the claim was made. Whether anything actually comes of it or not, Xander is Spike's chosen mate. They hurt him, or tried to. That's an affront to Spike, thought they didn't know it, and there wasn't a physical claim. The fact that he was with Spike should have been enough. Since, Spike had to take care of Xander, it was left to me, as Spike's Sire, to make right what was done, to get revenge for him, if you will." Angel explained, unable to believe that it hadn't been explained to her before.
"But you've got your soul. You're not supposed to care about any of that anymore, remember?" Buffy explained as if talking to a three year old.
Angel stopped and turned to Buffy, brow furrowed. "All this time, and you don't get it do you? Even after I lost my soul a few years ago, you still don't get it." Angel said, looking off into the night shaking his head. Gunn just watched from the sidelines.
"Get what? What is there to get. There's them and then there's you. You have a soul, they don't. What's there to get about that?" Buffy asked, indignantly.
"Buffy, I may have a soul, but I'm still a demon. I'm still a vampire. I have a soul, yes, but I also have my demon, and there are some things about being a vampire, and having my demon, that I can't ignore. The main one being my need for blood. The soul doesn't like it, but I HAVE to have it to survive. The second, but not at all less important, is my Childer. I may regret making them, but I don't regret having them. I love them all, and I can't ignore that or them, simply because I have a soul. I would be even less human than I am now, as a vampire, if I were to ignore my Children, and what's right for them, and what they need. Spike needed to take revenge on those two vamps, his demon, his upbringing, and his heart cried out for that. How can I ignore the cries of my Childe? He couldn't do it, so I did it for them." Angel finished his explanation, and turned to walk off.
Buffy stopped him by grabbing his arm and turning him back around. "You're wrong. Spike, Drusilla, they aren't your Childer, they're Angelus's. You're Angel."
"No, I'm Liam. I only go by either of those names because of habit of two hundred years. I'm Liam, and Liam had honor. I honor the bond that Angelus made, and the relationships that Angelus forged with his Childer, and I honor the relationships and deeds of both Angelus and Angel. That's who I am, and that's who I can't I ignore." Angel turned again and hurried down the street, disappearing inside the door of the Magic Box, Buffy watching from down the street.
"I'm thinking someone needs a major reality check here." Gunn said, before following his boss.
Buffy just stood there, looking after them both for a minute. "What the hell just happened here? And what did he mean, 'Xander is Spike's chosen mate'?" Seriously confused, Buffy followed behind them.
~*~
Spike looked up from the dozing Xander when he felt Angel walk through the back door. Blue eyes questioning, a silent nod and small smile. "Thank you." Spike whispered.
"Always, my William. You know that." Angel said, kneeling down beside his Childe. "How is he doing? Is he hurt?"
"No, he was just scared. He could see what they were planning to do with him. They were going to make him their pet, and he could see it." Spike said, knowing his Sire would realize just what that meant.
Angle closed his eyes and took a deep unneeded breath. "Well, they're�going to see the light, shall we say?" Angel told him with an amused smirk.
Spike chuckled. "I guess that's one way of putting it."
Both looked up as Gunn entered, but none of them said anything passed slight nods, as he moved into the main shop with everyone else. "Buffy will be here momentarily. I believe she's a little�confused about everything. She thought I was just going to scare them or something. She was a little mad at my methods of dealing with them. I had to explain a few facts to her."
"Well, I always knew she'd figure everything out eventually, I just couldn't believe she hadn't figured out that there is no distinguishing between Liam, Angelus, and Angel anymore. I knew it the moment you walked in the room yesterday. You were different than before. When did it become permanent?" Spike asked, knowing this was truly his Sire, minus the bloodshed across the continent.
"About a month ago. I'm still getting used to being Liam again. Before, it was Angel and Angelus. The soul and the demon. Now that they're merged, things feel different, but at least now I know who I am." Angel said, hoping his Childe would understand what he meant. He could see in his eyes that he did.
"Well, however it happened, it's nice to have you back, Sire." Spike said, leaning slightly against Angel's side, while Angel put his arm around his shoulders.
"It's nice to be back." ~*~
Chapter 8 Coming soon!