| Match 1 � Brian Ailshie Street Fighters vs The Mongol Horde Group A � Camp Crystal Lake Brian: Ryu plants his hands together and shoots a blast at the �Mongol�s Mark: You know though that Ghenghis and Attila are Huns not Mongols, and Crazyhorse is Native American of course. Brian: I know, this team name sounds good but doesn�t really fit the members, especially since I�m pretty sure Shan Yu was Chinese, and led the Huns� attack on China in �Mulan.� The team name is still cool sounding though. Mark: Ok, I guess. Anyway, Ryu�s blast catches Crazyhorse and knocks him out of the saddle. The �mis-named� horde spurs on faster and leaps at their foes. However, Attila gets a hook in the eye from Vega, and Shan Yu gets electrified by Blanka. Chun-Li steps up to Ghenghis Khan, and suddenly her hands are a flurry of motion. His head snaps back and the terror of the steppes falls dead. Winners: Street Fighters (1-0) Mongol Horde (1-1) Match 2 � Robert Newell The DA vs. America's Heroes Group AC - Hogwarts School In retrospect, it might not have been the wisest course of action to cast a magic charm on an unusual and unknown piece of technology. Harry's expelarmius charm caused the Rocketeer's rocket backpack to explode violently. The entire DA, Dick Tracy and the Rocketeer were consumed in the fireball. Captain America hid behind his shield and escaped the blast. Winners: America's Heroes (2-1) Loser: The DA (2-1) Match 3 � Brian Ailshie MIB vs Hollywood Action Stars Group J � Sci-Fi Movie Set Mr. Statistics: This one was pretty easy to figure out. Statistically, the �Action Stars� don�t stand a chance. The MIB may not be top of the numbers, but real people, especially actors just haven�t done well in these events. John Madden: Well you seem to be right. The four black suited agents take aim and four distinct sounds, yet identically final blast tear the Action Stars apart. Mr. T and Arnold climb out of the carnage, Arnold charging his foes. Mr. T: I pity the fool that . . . <*Splatter*> Madden: L and J fire and take out the last two Stars. Mr. Statistics: The MIB cleans the �house� team. Winners: MIB (2-0) Hollywood Action Stars (0-1) Match 4 � Mark Ailshie Kill Them All vs. The Tribesmen Group B - New York City "I got the skinny guy!" Wyvern shouts, leaping into the air. With a howl of rage, the boy/dragon shoots through the air toward a grey-suited man with a target on his forehead. Wyvern's breath begins to smoke, and he prepares to roast the man where he stands. Bullseye smiles sadistically and draws a thin knife--no longer than a butter knife--and whips it at the charging mutant. >THWIIPPP!< The knife strikes directly in the corner of Wyvern's eye, plunges through, and imbeds itself in his brain. He dies instantly, before he has the chance to cry out. "No way," Bullseye gloats. "Bullseye doesn't scare. Bullseye doesn't miss either." "So you can shoot," snarls Skeleton Key, as his arms change into blades. "Let's see how you fight hand to hand." Key closes to melee range, and indeed here Bullseye is outmatched. He knows it too, and chuckling he gives ground. Meanwhile, Scorpion brings his tail to bear on Allure, but the pretty lady is agile enough to keep dodging him. "Hold still!" Scorpion shouts in rage. "But why should we be fighting," says Allure, dodging another strike and finally laying her hand against Scorpion's face. Skin touches skin, and suddenly Scorpion finds himself breathlessly in love. He is confused, and his tail drops to the ground. Never one to squander an advantage, Allure draws close and kisses Scorpion full on the mouth. The full strength of Allure's charm power renders him completely under her control. The pretty brunnette puts on a pouting face. "That nasty Bullseye keeps trying to hurt my friends!" Scorpion, desperate for Allure's approval, turns and charges headlong at Bullseye. "What the--" Bullseye manages to get out before Scorpion crashes into him, fists flying. Skeleton Key steps aside for a moment, but the fight doesn't take long. Bullseye leaps away from Scorpion and lands beside an overturned hotdog stand. His fist plunges into a box of toothpicks, and he starts flinging the tiny wooden projectiles at Scorpion. The first pierces his throat at the precise point that immobilizes him. The second pierces his carotid artery, and the third and fourth punch through his eyes. Skeleton Key blinks--that was sure fast! He moves to intercept Bullseye, but the villain grabs Scorpions body, hoists it over his head and chucks it at Skeleton Key. It hits him, naturally. Meanwhile: "Hey chickie-pie!" says a disturbingly alien voice. "Hows about saving a little of that sugar for Carnage!" The symbiote cackles insanely and reaches for Allure with his tentacles. And suddenly the tentacles fall away, and Carnage stands exposed, a man in a funny looking suit. "Huh?" the now powerless man gets out before an ordinary looking man in a karate gi starts pummeling him within an inch of his life. "Yeah!" shouts Allure from just outside the negation field. "Get'm Sponge!" In a few moments Carnage, now bereft of his powers, is pummeled into unconsciousness. "My hero!" Allure says and rushes into his arms, kissing him hugely. Her charm power is negated within a ten-foot radius of Sponge, and maybe that is why she is so taken with him. Unfortunately, Bullseye's powers�while incredible--are not negated. Even if his aim were supernatural, an ordinary projectile has no powers of its own to negate. Sponge opens his mouth to say something to Allure, there is a dull "thunk" sound, and Sponge falls forward with one of Scorpion's stingers imbedded in the base of his skull. Allure screams. "That's right, girl!" smiles Bullseye, retrieving his knife from Wyvern's body. "Just stand there and scream. Make it easy for me!" "Hey, Target-face!" shouts Key. "You couldn't hit the broad side of a barn!" That gets Bullseye's attention. "Oh yeah, ugly?" he snarls, and whips his knife at Key's face. The knife is dead on target, but Skeleton Key simply folds his liquid form around it, so it passes right through his face. "You - You made me miss!" screams Bullseye, nearly apoplectic with rage. "You can't do that! I never miss!" He is so beside himself with rage that he doesn't even see Allure sneaking up behind him with a manhole cover over her head. >SMACK!< Bullseye drops to the ground, stunned and moaning. Skeleton Key slides over to him, and his arm becomes a long scythe-like blade. One quick slash, and Bullseye's head rolls away. Another quick slash at the still unconscious Carnage, and the match is over. Winners: The Tribesmen (1-0) Kill them All (0-1) Match 5 � Brian Ailshie Batman�s Enemies vs TMNT Group Q � Gotham�s Sewer System Lucas: Is it just me, or is this one just a bit lopsided? 6 super villains against 4 pint sized super heroes. April O�Neil: Who are you calling pint sized you fat, bearded hippie. The Ninja Turtles are all skilled and armed. Lucas: Well Batman�s Enemies aren�t exactly unskilled civilians. Tolkien: Well let�s see what happens. It looks like the TMNT are about to encounter their enemies. Penguin and Joker stand in the middle of the tunnel, Joker laughing his head off. April: Raph and Mike charge in. Penguin jabs with his umbrella but Raph catches it on a sai, spins it from his grasp and jabs the other sai into the fat villain�s neck. At the same time, Mike thumps the gun from Joker�s hand then crushes his skull with the other nunchaku. Then Mr. Freeze and Catwoman attack from behind our heroes. Freeze fires his ice-gun and, Oh NO! Raphael goes down! Donatello leaps in, though. He brings his Bo staff down hard on the scientist�s head cracking the dome of his suit. He�ll be out of the fight. Leo seems to be struggling with getting hold of Catwoman. She�s very fast and quite limber. She leaps from wall to wall, rolls along the floor and kick�s the leader of the Turtles in the back. Ha! That will teach her! Leo goes sprawling from the force of the blow, but Catwoman hollers in pain. Kicking a shell isn�t very smart! Mike follows through and takes her out while she is stunned. But what is that? Suddenly several vines leap from the walls of the sewer and latch on to Mike! He tries to pull free or hit them with his nunchucks, but to no avail. Leo starts hacking at the vines but each one he cuts down is replaced by 3 more! Lucas: I think this is Poison Ivy�s work we�re seeing now. Oh, it looks like now the orange and red clad turtles are both out of it. And here comes Two Face. April: Go Donnie! He saw the creepy looking villain and smashed him quick with his staff. Look out though! Oh no! Now Donnie is getting attacked by the vines. Suddenly Leonardo sees something and hurls one of his katanas. There�s the last of Batman�s enemies. Ivy goes down, and the vines finally stop shooting out. Winners: TMNT (1-0) Batman�s Enemies (1-1) |