Joey/Katie POV
�I�m sorry�I can�t�it�s�I�m going to bed, goodnight,� I say. I had to stop the kissing. I was hiding a secret and if we became intimate it would be even harder. I run up the stairs after grabbing my shirt. This was only suppose to be a place to sleep; how had it come to this?
* * *
�I can�t believe that you guys kissed,� Jen says. It was Sunday afternoon. Pacey had already gone to work so Jen and I went to a caf� for some coffee.
�Yeah, well, it would�ve gone further but I had to stop it,� I reply.
�Why?� Jen asks.
�Because we don�t really know much about each other,� I say. That was only part of the reason, though. The other part was that I was still lying to him and the closer I get the harder it is
to keep my secret.
�Well that hasn�t stopped Pacey before,� Jen comments.
�Yeah, I bet,� I mutter. Then I pause before asking, �Can I ask you a question?�
�I think you already did,� Jen replies chuckling.
�I know it�s not my business and you don�t have to answer. But I was just wondering who Andie was,� I say quickly.
�How did you find out about Andie?� Jen asks surprised.
�Pacey slipped and said her name but as fast as it came out he became quiet,� I say. �I can understand if you wanted to keep his privacy but I�m a curious person.�
�I think you should ask Pacey, and that�s hard for me to say, considering my big mouth.
Let�s go shopping and forget about this,� Jen replies, trying to change the subject, but I just couldn�t let it go.
* * *
When I got home that night I decided I was going to ask Pacey again. He walked in the door about eleven, went to grab his usual beer, then came to sit down on the couch, where I was already sitting.
�I�m sorry but I�m nosy, what happened with Andie?� I ask directly.
�Do you really want to know?� He asks, looking me in the eye.
�Yes,� I reply firmly.
�Andie was my�� he paused; obviously, this was difficult for him, �she was my�my wife.�
�You�re married?� I ask, surprised.
�I was married,� Pacey says, emphasizing the word was.
�What happened?� I persist.
�Andie was very sick. She�� he stops again, then continues. �Had some mental problems.�
�Oh,� I manage to reply. I don�t know what else to say, �I�m sorry I asked.�
�No, it�s okay. I have to accept what happened and maybe telling you will help,� Pacey says, then starts again. �She ended up not getting the help she needed.� Tears started to well in his eyes. I pull him into a hug as he barely manages to say, �She killed herself.�
�I didn�t see it,� Pacey continued through the tears, �I was trying to get the restaurant off the ground.�
�It�s not your fault,� I say as Pacey continues to break down in my arms. �How long?�
�About two years,� Pacey answers.
We spend the rest of the night on the couch, just sitting in silence.
* * *
I think I�m going to tell Pacey that I never had amnesia. I am sitting in his office, trying to get some work done, but I�m not doing a great job. I just keep thinking about everything. Pacey has been so nice to me and I�ve just been using him. As much as I love this life I think it�s time he knew. That�s it, I�m going to tell him today, I say to myself as I get up to go talk to him.
P/J STORIES
HOME