Written by Miyu, Vampire Princess

AUTHOR'S NOTE:
AU to the furuba universe...well only a little I think. I wish I could say when the idea for this came to me. All I do know is that it's going to take me an eternity to write the whole piece. *sigh* This story focuses on an original character and is told from her point of view.

Chapter 4 - Black and White

I swore that night after I talked to Akito, that I wouldn't let him or his family secret bother me. I wasn't affected by the curse, so why would I possibly feel uncomfortable?

I was affected more than I thought. Much more.

The evening following my second day of school and for every evening for nearly a two weeks , I found myself alone in the bedroom. I'm not sure why, but I felt unsettled being around my family now. It was a feeling lurking somewhere in my subconscious mind. A self-imposed hell as it were.

Damn Akito.

And damn me too.

Tohru was the most concerned. She would have to coax me from the room to either bathe or take a walk. She continued to talk like nothing was wrong, but she did ask lots of questions. I figured she was trying to divert my attention and learn what was wrong at the same time. I didn't want to admit it to her. My reasons were rather pathetic, even to my own ears.

Yuki was also very concerned. He'd come and talk to me before going to bed. Our conversations were mostly about school, and I appreciated the effort he put forth in trying to coax and explanation out of me. He really has a kind heart. But that didn't stop me from purposefully keeping a certain distance between us when we spoke. I felt guilty about that, but what was I supposed to do.

Kyo seemed to mind very little, as we'd never really spent much time together. But after our conversation on the roof that night, I felt that I should've been more friendly to him. Another wave of guilt would pass through me when I talked to him at breakfast. We still carried on, but the humor had run out a bit. I kept my distance with him too, and although he'd look at me curiously, he wouldn't say anything.

Shigure acted like nothing was the matter. I tried telling him what was running through my head one night, but I couldn't find the words and just ended up running out of his study and up to my room. Part of me was hoping he'd come after me, console me in some small way. It's what my father would've done. And I learned quickly that Shigure was nothing like my father.

Momiji was very disheartened that I was practically avoiding him. He was so sweet and caring. I know he was concerned, but I came up with excuses after excuses to walk to school or home by myself. Chidori and Sakura backed me up on two occasions, saying I was going with them after school. If I felt guilty for ignoring any of them, it was Momiji.

Strangely enough, it was Haru who broke the shell I had somehow placed around myself after my discussion with Akito. I hadn't really been avoiding him because...well, because he'd actually been avoiding me. Or so I thought.

Saturday afternoon was relatively quiet in my uncle's house. Shigure had left to visit Hatori while Tohru and Yuki had gone shopping. Kyo, I was told later, had taken off for Kazuma-sensei's dojo. I was left alone, and for once, I truly felt that way. The house was comparatively smaller than the one I grew up in, but the eerie quiet was much worse.

Of course, the quiet was broken by a knock at the door just after lunchtime. I figured it was a salesman and opted not to answer. Much to my surprise, I watched from the futon in the living room as the door opened and Haru appeared. He looked no different from the day before, save for the leather pants and black shirt he wore in place of his school uniform.

Although, when he looked my way, I could've sworn I saw something in his eyes.

"Oy, where's Yuki?"

I closed the book I'd been reading, my thumb holding my spot. "He went into town with Tohru to help with shopping."

"And Kyo?"

"I don't have a clue." I shrugged with my book still in hand. "He left just after breakfast for practice or something."

Haru nodded as if he understood what I did not. "Shigure-sensei?"

"At the Honke." I looked at him rather curiously. "I'm surprised you didn't see him."

"I haven't been to the Honke since last night," he replied honestly with a shrug of his own.

"Where did you sleep last night then?"

He shook his head, walking further into the room. "I didn't sleep."

"Where were you?"

With a grunt he sits in a chair across from me. "At the park."

Since he'd decided to make himself at home, I set my book aside. "What were you doing there in the middle of the night?"

He shrugged again. "Thinking."

I blinked, confused. "Just...thinking?"

"Aa."

I shake my head. "About what?"

"You."

Now I'm really confused. Why would he spend all night at a park thinking about me? It's the question I should've asked, but it came out something more like, "Sou desu ka?"

He nods definitively. "Aa." When I said nothing in response he continued, "Why have you been avoiding Yuki and the others?"

I look at him wide eyed. "I haven't been avoiding--"

"Yes, you have. You try not to make it obvious, but you have been avoiding them. Did Akito tell you not to talk to us? Not to hang out with us?"

"No," I replied tentatively. "He didn't."

"Then why are you avoiding us?" He leans over, his elbows resting on his knees. "You scared?"

"Yes." That answer came out much too easily for me. Haru's surprised and so am I.

"Of what?"

I bite my bottom lip, averting my eyes to the ground. "Of making a mistake. Of getting someone in trouble."

"What kind of mistake?"

"Some kind of accident," I replied with a sigh. "Something stupid."

"So you're not scared of us as jyuunishi. You're just scared that you'll accidentally transform one of us."

The smile in his voice indicated hidden laughter and I didn't know whether to feel embarrassed on humiliated. Both were pretty bad to begin with. I nodded, keeping my eyes on the floor.

"Sei-chan, accidents happen. Trouble happens."

"I hate accidents," I answered with a sniffle. "I hate trouble."

"No one likes pain either, but it's all part of being a part of the Sohma family secret."

"Is that why he told me?" I asked, knowing full well that Haru couldn't give me an answer. "Did he tell me this just to make me miserable?"

"You and those around you," Haru said. Sliding from the chair, he walked across the floor on his knees until he was sitting in front of me. "And some of us are pretty miserable to begin with."

"Funny, you don't look miserable, Haru-kun."

"Oh, I am," he replied with a smile. "I just hide it well." Reaching a hand out to me, he caressed my cheek with the back of his hand. "Don't let him make you miserable. Tohru's not miserable. You can't be either." He paused, then added, "It's a new rule."

I looked up at him then. "Says who?"

He winked before he responded, "Says me."

I took Haru's advice to heart. I didn't realize I was hurting everyone, especially my uncle. I talked to him about the curse a week later. He seemed very pleased that I came to him. Granted I'd hardly talked to him at all since the night I found out.

And I came to realize that it's not that bad of a thing. The curse, I mean. If nothing else, it was the perfect form of blackmail or coercion when one needed it. I knew Tohru never hugged any of my cousins simply for spite, and I tried to follow her example. But sometimes it was just difficult.

Like the time I hugged Kyo just to get him to shut up.

Did you know that he's LOUDER in his cat form than he is as a human being?

Yeah, I didn't think it was possible either.

But at least he didn't yell at me for hugging him. He did, however, manage to get me back the next day by scaring the hell out of me while I was walking through the woods. My heart continued to pound mercilessly from lunch, through dinner, until I finally managed to go to sleep that night.

Bastard!

And Yuki beat the crap out of him for it after breakfast the following morning.

It's just a viscous cycle I guess.

Things went much better at school, too. I talked more and more to Haru and Momiji in halls, much to the envy of my classmates. The Yuki fan club kept a close eye on me as well, although it was Yuki who came to see me more than I saw him. And after school, Momiji didn't pounce on me like I had thought he would. Instead, inching closer and closer until *I* finally hugged *him*. He was so happy.

And life, in general, was grand.

But like everything...it doesn't last.

Nearly two weeks after my talk with Haru, I helped Tohru prepare for a picnic lunch. There was going to be eight of us: Yuki, Kyo, Tohru, myself, Momiji, Haru as well as two other cousins I hadn't met before, Hiro and Kisa. Tohru wasn't sure what to make. There wasn't much in the house and she needed to do her shopping.

I made a few suggestions that my mother had done for picnic lunches and small gatherings. Strange that I never realized I'd paid attention in the kitchen until now. I helped her to make small sandwiches, rice balls and stuff bags full of crackers and pretzels. I tossed in a box of pocky for good luck and we were ready to go!

"Yuki-kun! Kyo-kun! Hurry or we'll be late!"

"Eh? Who packed the pocky?" Kyo asked.

I looked at him curiously. "I did." I put my hands on my hips. "Why?"

He shrugged, closing the basket, but not before snitching a strawberry from one of the bags. "I don't like chocolate almond."

"Then you don't have to eat any," I replied. Then I asked, "What kind DO you like?"

"Green Tea."

I tried to lift only one eyebrow, but for some reason that never worked. "Green Tea?"

"Wha--?" he asked, looking affronted. "There's nothing wrong with green tea."

I sighed, shaking my head. I didn't know they made pocky in green tea flavor. I made it a point to look for some the next time I went shopping with Tohru.

"Are we ready?" Yuki asked as he entered the kitchen.

"Hai," Tohru replied, checking the basket one last time before closing it tightly. "All set."

"What's this? You're not leaving me here alone are you?"

We all turned to see Shigure standing by the dining table as we headed for the front door. He looked a bit sad, his mouth turned down in a pout. For a moment I thought it was just one of his usual tricks, but then realized that he looked genuinely sad.

"Mit-chan coming over today, Shigure-san?" Tohru asked kindly.

He sighed, smiling...or at least trying. "H-hai. She'll be here soon."

"Mit-chan is Shigure's editor," Yuki whispered in my ear. "He loves to pick on her, but he hates being alone with her."

My mouth formed a little "o" of acknowledgement and I nodded in response.

"Good luck, Shigure-san," Tohru said, waving back to him as we walked down the path to the street. "Go easy on her this time, won't you?"

The group of us were quiet until we met up with the others. Brief introductions were made and I have to admit I was surprised. Kisa and Hiro were different from what I would have expected. Brother and sister, I had thought. But looking at them easily destroyed any theory I might have had.

For one, they weren't siblings. As a matter of fact, Hiro quite proudly informed me that he and Kisa were dating. They made quite the charming couple actually. Kisa was really cute, while Hiro tried to act like an adult. I knew enough about that act to see straight through it.

Secondly, I expected them to be younger...much younger...than myself. In reality, they were only two years younger than me. Surprise. Personality wise, they couldn't have been more different. But they do say opposites attract. Who am I to fight nature?

An afternoon with them, especially when Hiro wouldn't stop giving me the evil eye, was going to be interesting. It's not like I was going to bite him or anything.

We made it to the park just before noon. The blanket Tohru had brought was just big enough for the whole group. We sat, ate and chatted happily for a little while. Kisa talked mostly to Tohru, and I listened to their conversations with interest. When she did address me, it was mostly with questions about my life in America. I happily told her about my parents, school, and other things. She seemed very happy to know that there was a normal life somewhere.

Well, if that's what you wanted to call it.

Hiro snickered and chuckled at most of my answers to Kisa's questions. "You're not better than the rest of us."

I looked at him in surprise. "I never said I was."

"You act so high and mighty."

I scratched my head, confused. "When was that?"

"Just because you're not cursed."

"You mean living isn't a curse?"

"Why are you trying to be nice?"

"Why are YOU being so rude?"

"Do you want me to get in your face?"

"Do you want me to kick your ass?"

The last sentence, although my mouth was open, did not come from me. We both turned and looked to see Kyo seething, looming over us dangerously. If he was being protective, it was flattering. But I think he just wanted a good fight because he hadn't gotten one out of Yuki in days.

"Kyo, calm down," Haru said. "Let them settle their own fights."

"That's right," we replied in unison.

We looked at each other then, and for some unknown reason, didn't fight the rest of the day. Perhaps it's because we agreed on something...or at least tried to. We still glared at each other though, but in the end, it was funny, and we couldn't help but laugh.

Too bad, Kyo didn't see it that way.

The boy was itching for a fight. Just looking at him you could tell. And while Haru and Tohru both reassured him it was fine -- hell, *I* reassured him it was fine -- he was still hell bent on an argument of some sort. I briefly wished that Uo-chan was with us, since they seemed to argue a lot at school and no one got hurt. But she wasn't there, and in her place was Haru.

Not a good thing I soon found out.

Kyo threw the first punch, and the second. Both were blocked by Haru. The third swing went to cow as his right arm swung outward and connected with Kyo's chin. The cat was thrown backward a few steps, his balance gone. The fourth punch didn't quite connect with it's intended target -- Kyo's skull -- but it did cause him to lose his balance and fall to the ground.

I moved to interfere but Hiro stopped me. "Don't," he said. "Just watch."

"But they're fighting for no reason," I told him. "They should be stopped."

"Just watch," Hiro replied.

When I turned, Kyo was on his feet again and he and Haru were fighting. They matched each other punch for punch, kick for kick. I never realized Haru was into martial arts. He was pretty good, too. But in the end, Kyo was a bit quicker, able to land a punch to the younger man's face.

It was when Haru glared back at Kyo, snickering as he wiped blood from his lip, that I noticed a change.

"That's Black Haru," Hiro explained. "You don't ever want to mess with him."

"What was...I mean, what was Haru before?" I felt silly for asking, but I don't know how to phrase it any other way.

"We call the normal Haru, White." It was Kisa that answered this. She grabbed my hand as well as Hiro's, holding on tightly.

"His personality is kind of spilt between good and bad, white and black," Hiro explained further. "When he gets angry, he turns black."

"How do you get him to turn back?" I asked.

"It depends," Hiro said. "Usually Kyo just beats the crap out of him, he's unconscious for a little while, and wakes up white."

I gawked. "There's no other way?"

"Probably," replied Hiro with a shrug. "But I haven't seen it."

I looked over just in time to see Haru take another punch from Kyo. The boy stumbled backward, barely catching himself before he fell. He looked beaten and tired, but he continued his assault regardless. One last punch sent him to the ground.

Kyo clapped his hands together, only half satisfied with the result.

"Stupid idiot," he said, turning away from the fallen Haru. "Let's get back to eating. I'm starved now."

"Just be careful around him," Hiro whispered in my ear.

Which one...Kyo or Haru?

Kisa had let go of my hand and the two were walking off together, following the others. I looked back as I followed, wondering just how bad Black Haru could be.

I really shouldn't have wondered. Silly me.

About a week later I was invited over to Chidori's for dinner. It was getting late so I left just after dark. She didn't live that far from Shigure's or so I thought. After crossing a few streets I wasn't familiar with, I started to get the distinct feeling that I was lost. Then I saw a familiar figure walking across the street in the opposite direction. The white and black hair was a dead give away. I ran across the street and hurried to catch up to him.

"Oy, Haru-kun!"

The young man stopped and turned to look at me as I ran up to him. He looked at me curiously and asked, "What are you doing on this side of town?"

"I was visiting with Chidori, a girl in my class," I replied. Catching my breath I straightened and smiled. "What are YOU doing here?"

"I'm lost."

"Lost?" Well, Yuki did tell me that he can get lost pretty easily.

"I'm heading home," he added. "I think it's this way."

"Probably, since I was walking the other way and not getting anywhere."

He smiles at me. "How about we walk together then? Can't have someone picking you up now, can I?"

"Hai," I replied with a nod.

The walk was relatively quiet, even though we hadn't really spoken since the picnic. Oh sure we chatted at school, but there was no deep conversation, not like the time he came over to Shigure's to talk to me. I kind of missed that, but I wasn't sure what to say to him. So many questions and I wasn't sure if he'd answer them or not.

Funny how Fate always lends a hand.

"What do we have here?"

Haru stopped mid-stride. Just stopped, completely halted. I stopped a step ahead of him, looking back at him curiously. I'd heard the voice -- someone I didn't know, and apparently neither did Haru -- but I was more concerned about him all of a sudden. I knew a fight was coming, and I knew what would happen if it did.

"Looks like two little lost souls," said a second voice.

"We're not lost," Haru replied calmly. "We're on our way home."

"Is that so," chuckles a third voice. "Well, then, why don't you just hurry on home then?"

I'm all for getting out of there and fast! I reach out for Haru's arm, grasping it tighter than I should. My eyes keep track of the thugs stalking us. I tug at him to move again, but he doesn't. I look at him strangely, but his expression is blank, his eyes carefully watching the three thugs.

"Let's," I said, trying to encourage Haru to move. Still he wouldn't budge.

"Maybe you should listen to you girlfriend, buddy," said the second thug with a smirk. He stepped closer to me, placing a hand on my shoulder. "Or maybe you'd prefer one of us to walk her home?"

Haru moved so fast I barely saw him. His fist connected with the guys face while the other clearly snapped his wrist. Or was it his neck? In either case, the guy was lying on the ground in a matter of seconds, clutching his arm to his chest and wailing in pain.

The first thug strolled up, fists flying, but Haru was faster. Again with the punch to the face, and another to his stomach. No, that was a knee to the stomach. OUCH! He joined his friend on the ground, sobbing in agony.

The third guy didn't bother Haru. Nope. Came straight at me. Bastard. Had no clue how to fight either. All I had to do was kick out with my right leg. My boot clad foot connected to his crotch. Now that HAD to hurt. As the guy dropped to his knees, Haru looked at me a bit surprised. I just shrugged. My mom didn't raise a complete idiot.

As the boys started to get up, I backed up closer to Haru. "Haru, let's just go," I said, grasping his left arm tightly. "They're not worth any more of our time."

"Phea, you're right," he replied harshly, glaring at the two boys trying to stand. The third was still clutching at his crotch. They stumbled to their feet, helping their friend to stand, before running away. I sighed in relief.

"I think...I'd like to go home now."

"Not even a 'thank you'? How rude," Haru replied, walking once again in the direction of Shigure's house, or so I hoped.

"Arigato," I replied with a small smile, running to catch up.

"Do you mind if we stop off there," Haru asked, pointing to a park bench. "I think my shoe's untied."

"All right."

We make it to the park bench as I sit down as Haru raises first the left foot, then the right to check his shoes. The sneakers he's wearing are not new, but the right one is untied. I lean back on the bench, tilting my head back and closing my eyes, sighing. After a few moments I open my eyes, and I'm met with two very dark pools of...emotion. At first I think it's another attacker, but then I realize that it's Haru.

Is it really?

I stood from the bench quickly, taking a few steps away without saying a word. Haru followed my every movement with his eyes, then with his body.

I think the first sign of trouble was the gate of his step. The way he walked. It was more hurried than Haru would usually be. The second was the smirk on his face. Did Haru even smirk? Yes, he did. In black mode. The final sign was his laugh. I'd heard Haru laugh before, but this...this was much more sinister.

Black Haru.

I was in trouble.

"You didn't say 'thank you' properly," he said, stepping closer. He took two steps for every one of mine as I moved backward.

I didn't? Just keep moving backward, Sierra! "Gomen. How should I have said 'thank you'?"

"It's not difficult, really," Black Haru assured me. "Just a kiss."

My eyes widen. That's nothing to be scared about, is it? Well, it's kind of scary, especially when I'm out of room and a large tree trunk stops my movements backward. We're in a dark part of the park now and I'd be luck -- very luck -- if someone could see us from the street. "A kiss? That doesn't sound to hard."

"Have you ever been kissed before, Sei-chan?"

"I don't suppose my parents count."

"Iie."

"Then no."

Black Haru raised an eyebrow. He was mere inches from me, one hand on either side of my head. "Well, then, it might be just a tad harder than you think."

"How's that?" I asked.

He showed me by kissing me.

It wasn't as brutal as I would've thought, although he was very thorough with his tongue. Actually it was quite enjoyable once I got the hang of it. Haru was a really good kisser.

But here's where it started to go wrong...so very wrong....

I was so caught up in the kiss that I didn't feel Haru's hand on my leg. His touch was so soft, so tentative that it felt like merely a breeze against my thigh. It wasn't until I felt the wind against my leg that I realized that my skirt had been lifted to an indecent level, and Haru's fingers were trying to work their way inside my underwear.

I squirmed against him, pushing against his shoulders with my hands, but he wasn't budging. If nothing else he moved closer to me, pinning me against the tree. My heart stopped and I had to break the kiss to breathe.

"Haru...stop."

He looked down at me through half-lidded eyes filled with a desire I was unfamiliar with. "You wanted to say 'thank you' properly."

"And I have," I stated, trying to push him away again. Still he didn't budge much.

"Then let me say 'thank you'," he replied.

"For what?"

My question goes unanswered as I feel his lips against mine again. My mind becomes foggy as my body goes rigid. Reality comes crashing down on me as I feel his fingers against my butt, pulling my hips closer to his. Just my luck that he's totally aroused and strangely enough my own body reacts to that fact. Slowly I lose control of myself, his other hand somewhere under my shirt, because I can feel his fingers working on a nipple.

This is wrong, my mind argues. So very wrong. He has to stop!

His kisses left my lips and trailed down my throat to the collar of my shirt. I felt his hand leave my breast for a short period of time as it tried to undo the buttons of my shirt. I squirmed against him some more in mild protest. Even when I opened my mouth to scream for help, but nothing came out except for a moan.

If this was so wrong, why wasn't my body arguing too?

He finally pulled away with a low growl, stepping a way from me. I was stunned at first, but when I realized what had happened I took a few steps away from him, falling as my balance was a little off. He was hurting me and I barely put up a fight! Well, it wasn't like I could've kicked him from the position I was in. How was I supposed to stop him?

How could I have stopped someone else from doing the same thing?

I had felt protected. Cared for. And suddenly, it was all gone. Everything. All of it.

The tears started to fall, even though I didn't want them too. I stumbled to my feet, watching as Haru clasped onto a nearby tree trunk and banged his head once, twice. The third time there was this horrific crack and I yelped in surprise.

I stepped closer to him, reaching a hand out to touch his shoulder. "Haru, stop." WHACK! THUD! "Haru?"

"Get away," he said between gritted teeth. He didn't even try to look at me, just continued to bang his head on the tree trunk. "Run."

I blinked, startled back into myself. I backed away from him quickly, but I made no move to run. I wanted an explanation dammit. I wanted to know why.

"Sei. Run away. Onegai."

His words were filled with such...sorrow...that I had no choice but to obey. My legs, working without any thought, picked me off the ground and start running. They set a fast pace, one worthy of a track runner. I pushed, although my muscles screamed, my chest ached. Once I was clear of the park and nearly back to Shigure's, I stopped to look back.

No sign of Haru.

Was that good or bad?

Would he be black or white next time we spoke?

Would there even be a next time?

"Sei-chan?"

Shigure.

"I just called Ha-san to go look for you and Haru. It's really late. And on a school night. Daijobu desu...ka?" His voice trailed off as he got a better look at me, the "responsible adult" as I liked to call it kicking in.

What did he think of the bruises on my arms and legs? What did he think of my tattered shirt and rumpled skirt? What did he think of my frazzled hair and tear-stained face? What did he think?

Why did it matter?

"Sei-chan...."

I didn't wait to hear what he had to say. I didn't care. I just didn't care. Instead, I forced my legs to move just a little more, to run to the house, and this time I didn't stop to look back.

I fell asleep in the bathroom that night, curled up on the floor by the toilet. It wasn't as comfortable as a bed, but after the vomiting subsided and the dry heaves disappeared, I didn't have the energy to make it back to my room. I was happily unconscious to the world and I wish I could've stayed that way.

I awoke in my own bed that morning. Not sure how, or who. I was still dressed in the rags I'd worn the night before. I quickly peeled them off of me, grabbed my robe and headed for the bathroom.

Kyo was just coming out, with a towel over his arm and his toothbrush still in his mouth. We stared at each other for a brief moment. Something in his eyes wanted to question me, but he didn't. Instead he nodded and stepped aside to let me into the bathroom. He must've been the one to find me asleep on the bathroom floor.

School happened to be a pleasant blur. Chidori and Sakura were extremely worried about me and even bought me a special lunch that day. So I ate doubly because Tohru also made me a special lunch. I couldn't rightly eat one and not the other. It was just when I finished off Tohru's lunch that I realized I didn't eat supper last night, or breakfast that morning. I really was hungry.

Haru wasn't in school. I asked Momiji if he was okay and the boy shook his head. "He was pretty sick this morning," he explained. "Tori told me to go to school without him." The rabbit didn't seem too concerned, but he must've noted mine. "Did something happen last night, Sei-chan? Did you and Haru eat something you shouldn't have?"

I shook my head, more in a gesture of not wanting to discuss it than to say that nothing was wrong. I didn't want to explain to anyone just yet what had happened. I wasn't ready to deal with it.

I wanted to speak to Haru again.

I spent the good part of the afternoon asking myself why. Why would I want to talk to someone who attacked me? Who hurt me and damn near raped me for no reason other than it was a good time.

I don't think he meant to hurt me the way he did. I think it was totally meant to go some other way. But then, that's just me. The reality of the situation though, made me realize one very important thing.

I have a crush on Haru.

He helped me through a lot since I've arrived. Aside from Yuki he was the only other one that helped me to understand the jyuunishi curse. I enjoyed talking to him. He's very pleasant and intelligent. For some reason I don't think I see the facades he plays as often as the others do. Perhaps he's comfortable enough around me to let down his guard a little. He barely knows me, and I him, but I do care about him. He is my cousin, and in my mind, maybe something a little more.

Kami help me. I have a crush on Haru.

A BIG crush. HUGE.

And I may never get to see him again.

~TO BE CONTINUED~