| 18 Ways to be an Asshole 1. After sex throw 5 bucks on your date and leave. 2. The next day ask for it back. 3. After sex beat your date up. 4. Get the giggles at church. 5. Start a fight or riot, then call the cops and even testify as a witness. 6. Grab your cat by its tail and throw it off a cliff into the sea. 7. Cut your dog with a big knife, then use it as live bait for shark fishing. 8. Piss in in people`s spices if you don`t like the spice or if you think they use them to much. 9. Go into women`s bathroom and piss on the toilet seats. 10. If you are under 18, have sex with an adult, then sue them for rape. 11. If you are over 18, have sex with a minor, then call their father and tell him. 12. When her dad comes over to kill you, accuse him of raping his daughter and call the 13. When someone passes out, cut off your pubic hair and tape it to their chin.(since goatees 14. When you see someone who is is retarded or disabled, remind them of their handicap. 15. Go to a retirement home, tell an old person you are his (her) grandson , take him (her) to 16. Take a hungry homeless person out to lunch, then eat all their food. 17. Run around town, dressed as a clown and kick pregnant women in the stomach. (18. seems to be missing, i'm working on it...) by Chris Pontius, Big Brother Magazine |