Tout le Monde,

I don't know what's happening to me.  Today I feel like I've lost the war!  My heart is so succoming to this charming Man.  I woke up with him today feeling all the warmth of the world.  It's not love no, but close to it.  I wouldn't mind feeling this way and not being in love with him, but oh the feeling.  Like I am high.

He had his arms around me.  I can feel his skin and it was like I can feel each individual strand of his hair on his body touch me.  He has this smell of cologne on his shirt and cologne of his own filling my senses.  So intoxicating.  His embrace feel so strong yet gentle and for the first time with him, I felt a sense of release.  That my wills of being strong and in control, I'd let him take that all away.  That it didn't matter if I had to be on my toes and closed hearted.  If I could come to terms with myself I'd say it.  Above all, it would have been perfect if he did.  He called me 'my love' however.  Not exactly the same three words but close enough.  Ugh! just say it already! Tell me, mean it, and I will take it to heart!

But I'll wait.  I'm comfortable with waiting.  He will tell me someday and it'll be amazing.  Till then I'll miss him just as he says he'll miss me.  Even when we sleep and we don't dream of each other, I'll miss him.

I don't know why this is. Some feeling that I've been battling.  Or maybe it's because I'm coming down with a cold.  All I know is that I don't want this to get any better right no w because it'll only get worse later.  I'm still in this scared and protective shell that no matter how good it gets,  I'm still aware and I won't be swayed.

All things come to an end.