The Weirdest Geography Teacher In The World

1. "Are you saying Ni to that old lady?" (Quoting from Monty Python.)

2. "There are a few things that would happen if a pointed this fan at Daniel and made him sit there for the next six days. One he would get very cold. Two he would probably wet himself. Three I would get fired. And four it would be a prevailing wind."

3. "I have a book about interesting ways people have gotten themselves killed."

4. "How cool is he?" (Sarcastically when we were watching this video and a bloke was talking about paragliding)

5. he told us a really depressing true story and then he drew smiley faces on everything for the rest of the lesson to cheer us up.One of the things he drew a smiley face on was this cloud going over a hill (we were doing relief rainfall) and we decided that the cloud should look unhappy coz it had rained (?) so sir made it a sad face which I thought was mean on the cloud.

6. "In the rainforest there is a tree. This is a very happy tree. No, it doesn’t need a name. Do you know why it is happy? Fine, his name is Larry. Now Larry is a very happy tree Bcos he is very tall. He is an overachiever. Next lesson we will have to draw a serious diagram. Larry will be no more. "

7. Advert on the radio: What is the answer to huge debt problems?
Geog teacher: (in a happy voice) kill yourself!

8. "Is it mushroom, chicken, tomato? Or maybe oxtail, a now sadly overlooked soup"

9. "Itsy-witsy frankfurter things"

10. "They live by the sea, like Puff the Magic Dragon"

11. "I want to make as much noise as possible, because I'm annoying"

12. (scared)" Don't want to annoy the locals."

13. "No, Its not on an Indian burial site, although that could explain why I'm afraid of beans"

14. "If I had lots of colours, I'd make this nice and pretty"

15. "People always steal stuff of me"

16. (depressed) "I'm gonna have to buy some new colours, I just know it"

17. "Soft, silky water from the Lake District"

18. "Liverpool is an 'ickle airport. They have a cattle grid on the runway"

19. "Stand up and hold your arms out. Now imagine you are holding a baby in each hand. How are you going to protect the babies?"

20. "I get a tear in my eye when I see concrete over the pitch."

21. "Subsistance farming is growing crops for your own use. *pause* Are you laughing? Are you thinking the same thing as me?"

22. "Except you can't at the moment because there's dead sheep everywhere. Oh well."

23. "Its a sport including balls, not a word"

24. "Which we all know produces 57 varieties! AND MORE!!!"

25. He decided he needed to put exclamation points after everything he wrote on the board.

26. he also drew a little atom bomb around the title. This was the day after we watched 'Thirteen Days'.

27. "I was really impressed with the way you watched that video. You didn't need to keep getting up and walking out."

28. He always asks us to guess number so stuff.
Kid: Its his favourite game.
Geog. teacher: Oh yes!

29. (someone arrived delivering his invitation to the leavers 'do') "I hate letters. They're always bad news.

30. (reading the invitation) Why is it on a Thursday?
Kid: And she (head of year) expects us all to come in on Friday
Geog: Yeah, she would.
Kid: We won't come in if you don't, sir
Geog: I've got a really bad day on Friday too.

That's all for now. Thanks to Chocaholic for providing me with some of these. And of course, to the un named Geography teacher for providing us both with them. :)