Chapter 7

Matt didn't come to see Annie again until late Friday night. Annie had missed him so much, that when he came to visit her, she stood up and walked (she was still very weak) over to him, threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly.

"How come you didn't visit?" she asked reproachfully.

"I'm sorry honey. I thought you wouldn't want to see me after our row," Matt admitted,

"I would never not want to see you," Annie told him affectionately.

"Well, I wasn't sure," Matt said, looking embarrased.

"I'm going home tomorrow," Annie reminde him. She wasn't sure how to act about it, and she wasnted to talk to Matt about it.

"I know. Are you looking forward to it?" Matt asked. He seemed very tense, which worried Annie.

"Looking forward to leaving this place," Annie told him with a smiel.

"With Dave?" Matt asked carefully.

"What do you mean?"Annie asked nervously. She could feel Matt scrutinising every flicker of movement in her face and hands.

"Are you looking forward to having time alone with Dave, where you won't be interrupted?" Matt explained as truthfully as he could.

Annie bit her lip. "Can I tell you the truth? Will you promise not to tell anyone?" she asked him.

Matt was pretty sure he knew what she was going to say, and he felt like jumping for joy, but he kept his face serious and took her hands in his. "Of course, what is it?"

"I guess I'm kinda scared about being alone with Dave," she confessed. Matt had been right.

"Why?"

"You know why. Well, you know as much why as I do," Annie said.

"I guess so. Annie, if you really don't want to go home with him, just talk to the doctors about it. And you know you're more than welcome at my place at any time, day or night," he promised. Annie smiled.

"Thank you. I appriciate the offer, really I do. But if you don't mind, I think I should see how it goes with Dave, okay?"

"Of course. Whatever you want. Don't worry about me, I just want what you want. I just wanted you to know that the offers there if you ever feel you need it."

"Thank you," Annie said again and kissed him on the cheek. They both blushed.

"I brought a movie for you to watch," Matt said, changing the subject, for which Annie was gratefull.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Its called 'Titanic'," Matt told her. He grimaced when he saw the blank expression on Annie's face. 'Titanic' had once been her favourite movie, now she didn't even recognise the name. "Its got Leonardo DiCaprio in it," Matt added. Annie's expression didn't change. "Well, I'm sure you'll like it. You wanna watch it now?"

"If you want," Annie shrugged.

"okay then," Matt replied. He took the video out of his bag and put it in the VCR, making sure, as discretly as possible, that Annie got a good look at the case, he thought it might help her remember.

Annie was very quiet during the movue, more than three hours. Matt occassionally pointed something out to her, and she would nod at the insformation, but mostly she stared at the TV screen. It was like she didn't know what was going to happen, Matt thought, then realised she didn't. she had no idea the ship was even going to sink! She cried at the end, at all the frozen bodies lying in the water, and even Matt was choking back a tear or two, although he told himself it was because of Annie (what exactly, he didn't know).

After the movie was over, Matt got up and switched off the TV. Annie looked at him when the screen went blank. She had wiped away the tears and she was smiling.

"Dave and I danced to that song at out wedding, didn't we?" she said excitedly. Matt nodded.

"Well done! See, I told you it wouldn't be long before you started to remember things," Matt. He had told her that, but he hadn't really been sure until she'd remembered that. He was convinced that she was now on the road to recovery and remembering everything. It was just a matter of time.

"Oh God, I'm so relieved!" Annie exclaimed. Then she smiled. Matt thought how good it was to see her smile again. "But I didn't go and see the movie with him, did I? I went with you, didn't I?" Annie asked, remembering more.

"Yeah," Matt grinned. "Do you remember why?" Annie screwed up her face in concentration. Matt hoped it wasn't a mistake to push her to remember.

"Dave thought it was rubbish. His sister saw it and told him it was brilliant, so he assumed the opposite, right? He figured if she liked it, it couldn't be any good. But I wanted to go see it. I was going to go alone, but I mentioned it to you, and you insisted on taking me," Annie said, speaking the words carefully, as if she was remembering more and more of the story as she spoke, but shje wasn't sure if it was right or not.

"Fantastic!" Matt applauded. Annie smiled proudly. "One more thing, then I'll shut up about it. Do you remember the name of Dave's sister?" he prompted. Annie thought hard about it, then shook her head.

"No, sorry," she said quietly. Her smile faded in disapointment.

"That's okay. I don't know her name either. I was just wondering," he said, making Annie giggle and forget her embarasment. "Wanna watch another movie? I brought 'I Know What You Did Last Summer' and 'Cruel Intentions'," Matt said.

"No thanks. But leave them here, I might watch them after you're gone," Annie said.

"Okay," Matt said, taking the videos out of his sports bag. "Do you want me to leave 'Titanic' as well?"

"Uh, okay, if you don't mind," Annie said.

"Sure, its Caroline's. I'll just avoid her until you're done with it," Matt joked. The look on Annie's face made him laugh. "I'm joking honey. The video is Caroline's, but she won't mind you borrowing it a bit longer."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Hey, your'e going home tomorrow, you might not get a chance to watch them."

"I'll take them with me, if that's okay with you"

"Of course. And if you want some company while you watch them, just give me a ring," Matt offered.

"I don't know you're phone number. I probably did once, but I guess I forgot," Annie said, sounding more than a little embarrased.

"No problem, I'll write it on your hand. Do you have a pen?"

Annie handed him one. Matt took her left hand gently and wrote a number on it. Annie felt her pulse quicken as Matt held onto her hand a little longer than necessary. He started to stroke the inside of her wrist with his fingertips and the touch made her tingle with pleasure. Matt lifted her hand to his lips and gently kissed it. He abruptly let go of her hand and grabbed her shoulders instead. He pulled her to him and kissed her passionately. Annie responded eagerly. Then, as suddenly as he had started it, Matt ended the kiss.

Annie looked at him, with desire clear in her eyes and silently asked him why, even though, in her heart, she already knew.

"Sorry," Matt mumbled. He stood up to leave, but Annie caught his hand and pulled him back,

"Please don't go," she said. "I know I shouldn't be kissing you like that, but there's not need for either of us to apologise."

"I should have known better. You're married. Married! And tomorrow you're going back home with your husband. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe you will be safer with him than you would be with me." Matt seemed almost to be talking to himself.

"Matt, I've never felt safer than when I'm with you. Us kissing doesn't change that," Annie assured him. Matt stared at her as if she was insane, but saying he was the one who was crazy.

"No! I started the kiss, hell, I started all our kisses," Matt said, not caring that it wasn't true.

"No you didn't. and I could have stopped this. I could have pushed you away, or shouted at you, or even screamed for help. I didn't have to let you kiss me. But I did. And that means its not your fault," Annie said. She tried to take his hands, but Matt jerked them away.

"Annie, I don't care what you say. Its not your fault. You don't remember Dave, you don't feel like he's your husband. You know me best of anyone. You're confused. I should have known better," Matt insisted madly.

"Matt, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I don't remember. I'm sorry if that means I don't act the way you expect me to. I'm sorry if I treat you the way I should be treating Dave. I'm sorry Matt. I'm sorry," Annie said, bursting into tears. That seemed to bring Matt back to his senses.

"Oh Annie," he whispered and hugged her tightly. "I'm sorry."

"Are you sorry you kissed me the first time?" Annie asked a few minutes later, when her tears had almost stopped.

"if I had known how much trouble it would cause, I never would have done it," Matt said.

"But do you wish you hadn't?" Annie persisted, wanting a straight answer.

"No," Matt admitted. "I probably should, but I don't."

"Do you regret kissing me just now?" Annie asled softly.

"no," Matt said quietly.

"Well, then that's all right then, isn't it?"

"What?"

"We can forget it ever happened. But not really, we won't really forget. We just won't talk about it. Because we don't regret it, but we accept that it can't happen again," Annie reasoned.

Matt wanted to say that he didn't accept that. He didn't not want to ever kiss Annie again. But he just smiled, nodded and kissed her cheek, as if to show that that was the only way he would kiss her from then on.