No Strings

 

By Daphne

 

This is around Season 3 - I'm not sure all the dating situations fit with the show but hell they never keep the continuity so why should I worry? I think it's fair to say I have used some "dramatic license".

This could be the first of a series, if there is the demand.

 

New Year's Eve

Chandler shrugged at Rachel, for once Monica had a date to kiss at mid-night, Richard, and she was making the best of it. Ross was tongue deep in one of Phoebe's friends having split from Rachel a few weeks before. Chandler and Rachel both watched the brother and sister jealously and then set their eyes back on each other.

He moved over to her as the count down begun, "Just us this year."

"Yep… "

He looked at her expectantly. "Please Rach? Would you let me kiss you? I promise it will be just a nice friendly kiss."

Rachel smiled in sympathy at the desperation in his voice. He thought she didn't know that he wanted Monica, they were both hurting tonight. She reached her arms around him and looked into his face waiting for the moment. As the chimes begun she stretched up to him as he lent towards her. Their lips met briefly in a friendly kiss, "Happy New Year."

He smiled, "Happy New Year to you too."

They stood in silence watching other couples who had still not released each other. Joey's hand had disappeared right up the skirt of his date and Monica and Richard had fallen back onto the couch. Chandler grimaced. "Drink?"

Rachel nodded watching Ross press against his date. As Chandler held the glass out to her Rachel pushed him away and grabbed the bottle and poured it straight down.

Chandler looked at her shocked. "It could be worse you know."

"Yeah? How?"

He pointed at a couple where the guy appeared to be trying to eat his date, "You could be dating him."

An hour later a very drunk Rachel and Monica were singing the birdie song on the coffee table (with actions). Joey had disappeared across the hall with his date and Phoebe had gone home with hers. Richard was trying to get Monica to come home with him. Ross was oblivious to his surroundings as he got increasingly heated with his date in the kitchen.

Richard gave up and put Monica in a fireman's lift over his shoulder.

"Say goodbye." He told her firmly.

"Goodbye Rachel, Ross and woman stuck to Ross's face." Monica shouted out and Richard got her to the door before she yelled at him to stop.

"Wait. I have to say goodbye to Chandler. I never kissed him Happy New Year. I always kiss him Happy New Year." Richard sighed and put her down, shrugging apologetically at Chandler.

"Bye, bye Monica. Sleep well!" Chandler said and kissed her lightly on the cheek.

She flung her arms around him and gave him a big wet kiss on the mouth. "You're a really, really, nice guy. I do love you."

Chandler smiled, she was going to be really embarrassed tomorrow. "I know you do Mon. But then you love most people at the moment, a few gallons of wine makes everyone very loveable."

"No you really are the nicest, bestest guy that ever, ever lived."

"Thanks." Richard muttered quietly to himself.

Chandler smiled at Monica, even if she was drunk it was nice to hear. "Thank you. I like you too, and I'm not drunk, well only a little."

"Why don't women stay with you? I always wanted to know why you can't keep 'em?" She looked up at him with big eyes and then whispered loudly. "Do you have a small pee pee?"

Chandler grimaced. "Did your mother make you and Ross use that word?"

Monica nodded, "Do you?"

Richard picked her up again. "Time to go before you are too embarrassed to see Chandler ever again."

Ross separated from his date, "OK we're going too. Happy New Year guys."

Chandler looked at him in horror. "You're going to leave me to look after Rachel in this state?"

Ross looked slightly guilty for a moment as he realised why Rachel had got in such a state, he was about to offer to stay when he remembered what he would be giving up, Chandler would be giving up nothing. "Come on Chandler, it wouldn't hurt you to stay on the couch and make sure she doesn't escape."

"And hold her hair back when she starts to vomit." He replied in disgust.

"She doesn't normally hurl, she just gets very affectionate, a bit like you really." Ross told him.

"I don't sing like she does."

Rachel stopped singling, "Are you all talking about me?"

Ross tried to pull her down from the table. "Yeah, Janine and I. have to go…"

"Jeanette." Jeanette butted in stony faced.

Ross looked embarrassed. "Right, Jeanette and I have to go so Chandler is going to stop with you and make sure you're OK"

"Why does he need to stay? What am I eight?"

Chandler moved back over to her. "It's not what you ate Rach, it's what you drunk, or rather how much you drank."

Ross and Jeanette moved to go. Ross patted Chandler on the back. "Thanks man, you know there's not many guys I would trust to look after Rachel like I trust you."

"Yeah - but I'm guessing the numbers increase dramatically when it's your only chance of sex. OK Rachel say goodbye to Ross and come down from the table like a good girl."

"Byeeeeeeeee! Go have great sex!" Rachel told them in a voice riddled with sarcasm.

Chandler watched the departing couple with trepidation at the night that was ahead of him. "Come on Rachel off the table, Monica'll be blaming me for the scratch marks tomorrow."

"Do I have to go to bed? I'm not sleepy."

"No we can sit quietly until you calm down a bit."

Chandler collapsed onto the couch and was surprised when Rachel sat on his lap. Her wide drunken eyes staring at him.

"You looking after me?" She slurred.

"Yeah, so be a good girl."

"You never answered Monica's question."

"No I didn't"

"I thought she would know. You too are always so cuddly I thought you would have got a stiffy at least once so she could tell. Do you get a stiffy when Monica sits on your lap?"

Chandler frowned. "No."

"Do you have a small one then?"

"I don't think so."

"Don't you know?"

"I never compared it."

"Do you want me to check it for you?"

Chandler laughed. "I think I'll pass."

Rachel wriggled and looked down at his crotch. "I wanna check it. I think a guy needs to know if he has a small one."

"I don't have a small one OK." Chandler said more firmly.

"Are you getting cross with me?" She said with a sad voice and cuddled him closer. Chandler breathed in sharply and tried not to respond to the feel of her pushed up against him.

"Where were you born?" She asked him suddenly.

Chandler looked at her bemused. "I don't remember."

Rachel smacked her thigh in irritation. "No, no, you're not supposed to say that. OK, OK, are you close to your parents?"

"Which one. The blonde who chases teenage boys… or my mother?"

Rachel frowned again. "Oh yeah…. " She paused, something wasn't right. "Well that must have been hard."

"Don't really want to talk about it."

Rachel scowled. "Oh…" She leant her head against his shoulder. "You feel really nice." She said after a while. Chandler tried to shift away as his body started to agree with her. She giggled and pulled him back, she was winning at last.

"Rachel, I can feel your nipples when you hold me that close." He said to warn her.

"That's OK. I can feel your erection. And you were right, you don't have a small one."

"I haven't got - I'm not…" He stuttered in embarrassment at being caught.

"What have you got in your pocket then?" She giggled and looked at him with innocent eyes.

"OK, I'm just comfortable…"

"Comfortable?! And if I wiggle like this will that make you more 'comfortable"?

Chandler writhed to get away from the direct contact she was making.

"Do you think this dress is buttoned up too high? Should I undo a few?" She did so and looked into his eyes with a challenge. He tried really hard not to look down, then gave up and allowed himself a quick glance. She was wearing a black bra that cupped her breasts. She grinned at his nervous expression as he looked back into her face. "You feel even more comfortable now?" She teased him. "You know I'm wearing stockings - look." She pulled her dress up and exposed her stocking tops.

Chandler gulped, stood up suddenly and tipped her onto the floor. "Sorry Rach I really need to get to sleep now. I'm going to settle down on the couch, you go to your room."

She giggled from the floor. "I haven't been sent to my room since I was a kid." Chandler looked down at her coldly and her expression fell in response. "OK," she said quietly, and went to her room, Chandler sighed in relief. He went to the bathroom, washed, brushed his teeth then stood for five minutes trying to have a pee, but his penis was not into multi-tasking.

He stripped to his boxers and a T-shirt, went back to the couch and settled down, pulling the blanket over himself. He heard Rachel go across to the bathroom and decided to pretend to be asleep. Moments later she came and sat next to him.

"Chandler are you still awake?"

"Mmm." He muttered, keeping his eyes closed.

"I just came to say I was sorry, for teasing you like that."

Chandler opened his eyes, "Forget about it. You had a little too much to drink."

"You're not still cross with me?"

"I'm not cross with you. Night Rachel." He closed his eyes but she didn't move.

"You don't need to sleep on the couch, why don't you come into my room, it'll be more comfy."

He opened his eyes and looked at her again, tempted, the couch was lumpy, but it was too tempting. "SOK I'm happy on the couch."

She looked at him sadly. "You've not forgiven me? You would cuddle up in bed with Monica if she asked you."

Chandler sighed, "OK. I'll sleep in your bed."

He followed her to her room and climbed in making room for her. Rachel stripped off her bathrobe and Chandler gasped, she was wearing a tiny negligee. "We can't sleep in the same bed if you're wearing that!"

Rachel looked down at herself. "You want me to put something else on?"

"I think it would be safer."

"OK." She rummaged around in her dresser and pulled out a long T-shirt then pulled the negligee off.

"Rachel!"

"What? You wanted me to change." She stood naked whilst he peeked through the hand that covered his eyes. She smiled and put the T-shirt on. "That better?" He took his hand away and looked at her. "Don't you have any pyjamas?"

She grinned. "Yeah - OK." She went to pull the T-shirt off.

"No! No! The T-shirt will do."

At last Rachel settled down next to him. "Can I have a cuddle?"

"Not until I'm less… comfortable."

"I don't mind. "

"I do. Now go to sleep."

"You sure you don't want me to check it for size?"

Chandler ignored her and rolled onto his front for safety.

 

Chandler took a while to get to sleep. His thoughts raced as first Monica and then Rachel came into his head. He woke in the middle of the night confused and panting, he had been having an erotic dream but the reality of his position was even better than the dream. He jumped when he realised what was happening. Rachel had her hands down his boxers and was gently masturbating him.

"Rachel! What are you doing!"

"You don't know?"

He held her off. "Stop! Why then?"

She huffed and ran her fingers up his T-shirt. "I was bored and you seemed to be quite excited."

"This isn't right." He shuddered as she ran her fingers around his nipples.

"Why? Don't you like it? Don't you like me? Would you prefer it if I was Monica?"

"I don't have feelings for Monica."

"Right!" she said sarcastically, "And I don't have feelings for Ross."

"I'm sorry about Ross but that's why this is wrong, you're drunk and unhappy and this would just make it all worse. I don't mind talking if that would help."

"You know what Monica is doing right now, right this minute?"

Chandler shuddered at the image that came into his head.

"And Ross is with the genie, but I'm in bed with you… naked."

"What!"

She pulled the covers off to show him her body. Her skin was so good that it shone in the moonlight. He had only caught a glimpse of her breasts once before, by accident. This time they were right in front of him, begging to be fondled and kissed. No woman should have breasts that good. Chandler stared at her, fighting with himself. She moved closer to him, her lips slightly parted.

"Just no strings sex Chandler. It'd make us both feel good. I trust you and you trust me. Be a man for me, just tonight."

Chandler could hear his own breathing, his body telling him to give her what she wanted. He repeated Ross's words over and over about trusting him. Her lips met his and he responded. It felt so natural, nothing wrong with it, the exchange of affection. Her tongue snaked around his and his hands started to drift down to caress her naked skin. She hiccuped and that stopped him, reminded him again that she was drunk. She grinned and put her hands to the bottom of his T-shirt, he passively let her take it off him. But he held her off when she went to do the same of his boxers.

She smiled again, "You shy? I could promise not to look but I already felt it, and you got nothing to be shy about."

He shook his head, "It's wrong." He said weakly.

"Does it feel wrong?"

"No it feels good, it feels really nice and natural."

She reached her lips to kiss him again and used the diversion to move her hands round his boxers. She hooked her feet into the crotch of them to pull them right off. A moment later she flung his boxers away.

"That way I get to see your butt when you get out of bed." She told him with a giggle. "Oh boy you're really shaking Chandler. You do know what to do?"

"Rachel we should stop now. Tomorrow you will really regret this. I know you will."

"Whatever." She responded and started to kiss him again pressing her naked body right up against his. He couldn't resist her, within minutes he was kissing her as hard as she was him, his hands exploring her. She gasped as he gave up all pretence and pushed her onto her back. He shoved the covers impatiently off them and climbed onto her. Her legs were silky smooth against his. She stretched out contentedly, stroking and kissing him back. His muddled brain told him he just had to get it over with, before his conscience stopped what his body craved so much. He stabbed at her with his penis to find her entrance. Her eyes shot to his. He paused nervously, but she bent her legs up to help him then arched and cried out as he at last found her and joined them. The sexual high it gave him was instant. The whole time he thrust into her he was riding a pinnacle of increasing sexual thrill. He could feel the sweat bead on him, his nerves jangling to attention. But his movement in her was guilty and fast, as if he might be caught. He would enjoy the memory, right now he just had to ease the overwhelming need he had. He couldn't look at her again, he couldn't do anything but find a way to release the tension in him. He only slowed when his body started to convulse, he groaned, thrust one last time and held himself in position as the pleasure washed over him and out high into Rachel. He released her, collapsed and rolled onto his back to stare at the ceiling.

Guilt crashed over him in a tidal wave. He had been trusted to look after her, but she would have been safer on the street. He had had sex with one of his best friends and Ross's ex, the woman Ross still pined over, when she was too drunk to give consent. He had done it without a condom for no other reason than momentary, uncontrollable lust.

"Chandler!" Rachel snuggled up next to him and put her hand on his arm. "Don't leave me like this."

He peered at her through the dark and realised what she meant. He reached his hand down to caress her.

"I want your tongue." She told him.

Chandler paused, was it a worse crime to go down on a woman when she was too drunk to give consent or more ill mannered to leave her high and dry? The thought of being down there was tempting, until he remembered that she must be leaking his semen, he didn't really fancy coming into contact with that. Rachel moaned again beside him. "I was nearly there." She said in frustration. He clambered down her body and put his mouth to work on her. The least he could do in the circumstances, he decided.

But she wasn't leaking any of his fluid, she tasted and smelled incredibly good. His relief was short-lived as he wondered for a moment what the hell had happened to it. He had been deep in her when he came but even so, presumably it fell out again? Hell it must all be swimming in the right direction. Was he the only guy on the planet cursed with sperm that all knew which way to go?

"What did you do with it?" He muttered.

"What?"

He pushed his tongue gently against her and her hands went instantly to his hair as she murmured in appreciation.

"Oooh just there, mmmm."

Bingo, but then it was not difficult to find, it was pretty swollen. He kissed and caressed her and started to enjoy the intimacy of having his mouth between her legs whilst Rachel writhed.

She thrust herself forward onto him as her arousal increased. "Are you comfortable again yet Chandler?"

He pulled away and kissed her upper thighs, "Oh God yes."

"Cause I could do with something to suck."

She moved until she had her legs apart over his face. She still wasn't dripping anything that smelled like it had belonged to him, Chandler noted, "I have some mints." He said nervously and then gasped as she started to lick his penis.

"Very comfortable." She said happily and took him into her mouth. He glanced down in shock and speculated on whether getting head from a drunk friend made his crimes even more despicable. He decided that he had already broken all rules and trust and besides, she was on top of him, there wasn't a lot he could do without being very rude. He started to lick at the core of her again and was rewarded with a gasp and groan. He sucked down hard on her clitoris and she screamed out, he felt her body shudder as she gasped and pressed herself right onto him and then she was still. She climbed off him and lay on her back with her head turned to his penis. She held him by the hips and helped him to move on top of her, giving him easy access to her mouth.

"Do you want me to warn you when I come?" He asked nervously, poised over her mouth. She started to bob up and down on him and murmured something incomprehensible.

Chandler peered down at her. "Didn't your mother ever tell you not to talk with your mouth full?"

She pulled off him and giggled. "I said I'm gonna know when you come by the fact that I'll get my first low alcohol drink of the night."

Chandler was pretty sure that ejaculating into Rachel's mouth took things well over the edge of respectability. The position they were in did that. But the sensation she was giving him was incredible. Hell tomorrow was another day, he gave himself up to the pleasure she was giving him until he knew that he was about to explode.

He collapsed gasping onto his side and she moved with him. He looked down at her mouth around him and the erotic scene sent a blast of arousal up him. He grabbed hold of her head to hold her still as he writhed in pure ecstasy. His body started to release semen into her mouth and the sensation of her swallowing him down made his balls tighten to release even more. When he finished she let go of him and they both relaxed. She shifted back up the bed pulling the covers with her.

"We shouldn't have done that." He said quietly stroking her hair.

"Yeah I'd had enough to drink." She said and giggled. "Never done that before, I didn't know you had so much… stuff."

"Me neither. " He said sleepily. She reached up to kiss him drunkenly but crashed out on top of him just before she reached his mouth.

He looked down at her in surprise and the guilt crept back up over him. He lay for a few minutes drifting in and out of sleep. He liked having her sleeping on his chest but he kept waking. So at last he gave in and gently moved her off him and onto the pillow. She looked so sweet that he stroked her hair and kissed her sleeping face.

Now that his lust was satiated he was panicked at what he had done. He felt like he had portrayed the whole group. He had a frantic need to conceal the evidence that was no different to a murderer at the scene of a crime.

She shifted as he tried to clean her. "Great pee-pee." She murmured.

 

Chandler left her and went back to his apartment. He slept for four hours with the smell of her all around him, then showered, dressed and went back across the hall. Rachel was just emerging from the bathroom, her still damp hair told him that the last of the evidence had been washed away.

"Happy New Year." He said with a nervous grin.

"Oh God Chandler, how drunk was I?"

"Pretty bad."

"Thanks for looking after me. I seem to remember that you stayed over?"

Chandler swallowed, "What do you remember about last night?"

"Not a lot. I remember you looking after me and being really sweet and attentive."

She shuffled over to the kitchen, grabbed some water and a headache pill. "God I feel ill - never let me drink like that again Chandler."

Joey appeared looking expectantly for breakfast. "How's the head Rach?"

"The head was great." Thought Chandler cursing himself.

Ross and Phoebe entered together arguing, they all grinned when they saw Rachel. Phoebe giggled, "You gave a great rendition of "I wanna have sex on the Beach" Rach…. But you did keep forgetting "the beach" line." Still Monica was only a little behind you. I'm guessing Richard will have had his hands full."

Rachel sat down and put her head in her hands, "Oh God did I do anything else stupid. I have this really strange taste in my mouth, what the hell was I drinking?"

They all considered for a moment, "Just wine wasn't it? Chandler did she drink anything strange? You didn't let her have anything else to drink?" Ross asked him and they all looked at him expectantly.

"She crashed out pretty soon after you left." He said, trying not to sound nervous. "And I slept on the couch." He said unnecessarily.

Rachel frowned, "Was I sick then? I have this vague recollection of you in my room in the middle of the night."

"You were restless in your sleep. I checked a couple of times that you were OK."

Rachel flushed, "Oh my God! I woke up naked, you didn't see me like that did you?"

Ross looked at Chandler accusingly and Joey grinned.

"It was dark, you had the covers over you, I didn't look. "

Rachel frowned again. "Did I try to kiss you or something?"

Phoebe smiled at her, "You tried to kiss all the guys at some point, I think you got a little horny."

Ross frowned at her, "You didn't tell me she had was horny. I wouldn't have left Chandler with her if I knew she was horny. " He whispered.

Phoebe grinned. "Yeah right - you were neck deep in Jeanette. Didn't her rendition of "I feel horny, so horny, horny, horny" give you a hint? And anyway it was Chandler - don't you trust Chandler?"

Ross looked embarrassed. "Sorry - of course I trust Chandler."

"Poor Chandler." Phoebe smiled chewing on an apple, "Left with a drunk horny Rachel to look after."

Rachel groaned again, "Did I come onto you Chandler? OK I'm sorry I did didn't I? That's why you looked so embarrassed this morning, you couldn't look at me."

"You were a little…. Flirtatious." Chandler muttered.

"I showed you my stockings! I can remember sitting in the chair and showing you my stocking tops and you stood up all shy and I fell onto the floor. Oh God I'm sorry. Is that why you were embarrassed?"

"Yeah - woo - really embarrassing." Chandler said laughing nervously.

 

 

January 21st

The girls came in arguing, "I can't be pregnant, I haven't had a date for months." Rachel was telling Monica.

The rest of the gang looked up as the girls entered. Ross jumped up, "Rachel's pregnant?"

Rachel grinned dismissively, "I'm a week late and I've been sick a few times in the morning so Monica is jumping to conclusions."

Ross frowned, "Well you should at least take a test."

Rachel shook her head, "I haven't had sex since, well since, before we broke up… there's really no point."

They all turned as a loud noise indicated that Chandler had crashed out onto the floor. He woke a few seconds later with the gang standing over him.

"You OK buddy? You fainted?" Joey said looking concerned

Chandler looked up dazed, "Must have stood up too quick." He got slowly to his feet and sat down. Rachel handed him some water. "See Monica - I haven't crashed out once. You should be accusing Chandler of being the expectant parent!"