An Ode To DMG

My little dummumonkeygirl
All furry and naked
None of us is quite sure
If her name is Alice or Fred

She's married to so many of us
Mel, Ez and Auds
But its Ez and DMG who are the best
We've even won awards

But we love our resident bigamist
Even more than the perverts
But I have to admit
Everytime she gets married, it hurts

As she bounces round the board
All drunk on vodka shots
"More alcohol and beers!" she shouts
And we give her lots and lots

"Monkeys take baths too, you know"
She tells me when i mock
But then they can be put in prison to
Btw, please check the door is locked

I know DMG far too well i fear
I've talked to her on the phone
And when we meet in Manchester
I'll want to take her home!

Will she get married again?
Who knows? Not even DMG!
We love you little monkey
Though you're crazy as can be