Round 5 - 11/05/2002

Vs Grammar Carlton @ Colin Maiden No 1

Score:	3 - 5
HT:	3 - 5

This week had been hard for a number of the guys in the team, as a friend of ours, Marcus, had
his life cut too short at the age of 23. For the team this meant that we were going out onto the
field with a mark of remembrance, and commitment to put on a good game for him.

It was a derby for the Cougars, as we came up against our former club and a number of old foes.
It was especially important for Pornstar as he came up against his younger brother in a forward
match up we had all been anticipating.

Surprisingly, we were yet again called to put ourselves on the scales to ensure our eligibility.
For the second week running, Joel failed first up, only to strip off and pass (only because of
his balancing talents). This week, Craig did not want to test his luck, and fortunately we had a
similar looking Chris Smith who weighed in well under the mark, nice one Snowy. As well, Pus and
Butcher stayed as far away from the scales as possible. As for Grammar Carlton, they too had a
few weight issues, not least of all was the first-five who weighed in at 87, then went right down
to his daks, and managed to convince us all that 85.6 was an acceptable weight for a first five.

Not much was said before the game, but needless to say that all were all focused on giving our
best performance to date.As per usual, Stevie G lost the toss, and The Cougars kicked off with
the wind in the first half.


Now because I am writing this a number of weeks after the game, sorry but I have been especially
lazy recently, I have forgotten most of what happened during the game. This means one of two
things, firstly, this match report is not as comprehensive as others (some may say that is a good
thing) and secondly, the comments that I do recall may not necessarily appear in chronological
order. I apologise for the increased inaccuracies.
 
Okay, for all of us a definite highlight was the opening stanza in which a defensive kick from
Grammar came out to our left wing. The ball was picked up by Hoppy, who was not in the mood to
run it back into the opposition forwards, so instead he snapped a drop kick, and slotted it! Cue
stunned looks and sideline cheers. None of us could believe it, a) we got a kick, something we
had been lacking for a while, and b) Hoppy was ten in from the touch and about 30 from the posts,
under any circumstance this kick was impressive.

Well unfortunately Dave was not able to attend this match, but fortunately for Eye of the Cougar
News, we had the girls on hand with the camera. Late commers to the game included Dom, who has
acquired Matt's ability to always arrive late, and Gaz, who we all managed to spot from a
distance due to the vivid Five-0 shirt!

3-0 up the boys looked threatening against a top of the table performer. Unfortunately we could
not capitalise on that, and while we looked good in the opposition half, we never really managed
to finish. Our line did eventually succumb to pressure from the Carlton forwards, and they
crossed to score what would be the only try of the match.

3-5 at half time.

The story could have been very different at the half, but missed kicks by Wyane (2) Matty (1 or
2, I do not recall) and Hoppy (1 incredibly bad kick, from about where he got the initial points.
Although this time the ball somersaulted through the air and failed to reach the goal posts, just
when he was looking good!) cost us dearly. It looked like each time we manage to get into their
22 they would commit a penalty, and we would invariably miss the kick!

In the second half Snowy came on at halfback and Wayne moved into first five. 
Now we all know that the Horners come from Grammar, and that they love the club, but that is no
excuse for Pornstar being covered in his traditional Green and Yellow tape. What was even better
was the fact that he (and Joel) forgot at stages who we were, and encouraged to opposition to
keep going.
 
An incident from last year's clash between the Cougars and Carlton Gold that we may remember is
the fight that left Petey with an attractive bloody ear. Well as a continuation of that story,
Petey this year found the offenders hand at the bottom of a ruck, where he politely returned the
favour, and stood on the guy's hand. Well that will learn the fool a lesson!!

Now back to the game at hand, from what I can recall, it was pretty messy and disjointed half.
What was of note was an appearance by Gazza on the field, as he put on his boots and managed to
hijack a jersey off George. Now I should say that George did look quite the Cougar in the
Hawaiian shirt! Out Gaz came on in an attempt to win the game for us. Unfortunately, we could not
manage to break through convincingly enough to seal a victory.

A few highlights were definitely the breaks by Hoppy and Snow, who both looked good down the
right. Snowy came the closest, but with a number of the opposition on his back, he was cut down
sort of the line.
 
A lowlight would have to be the penalty from in front, well a little to the right, that Gaz
missed, a kick we would all have put money on!

Still with an opportunity to win, the boys had to snatch a victory, with a scrum in the Grammar
22. Gazza lined up to emulate Hoppy's earlier heroics, unfortunately he missed from two attempts.
Of note however, was the fact that Gaz slotted a far harder kick once the final whistle had been
blown!

The after-match was a little less lively than usual, but most of us picked up when Stevie G was
awarded the coveted title of Man of the Match; this was for some continued strong leadership and
awful dress sense. I should note that the time was nothing to be proud of, and what made matters
worse was the fact that he had to make a quick trip back to the toilet where he 'spat out the
froth'!

Anyway what ensued was a plan to hit Bill's karaoke, I mean it would be rude not to after the man
invited us round, stupid man!! Well I am naturally rude, and decided not to go (whipped!!), but
sources tell me that a good time was had by all. 40 ounce for Horner, Gaz ripped and Old Bugger
messy over the BBQ! One interesting story was that of Macca, who on hearing his 'anthem' of
'Bohemian Rhapsody', tried to get in on the action, now being intoxicated he was far from polite,
and currently he does feel like a pretty stink guy (I don't think its for me to say why).

Okay that's it from me the Roving Reporter, again sorry for the delay in getting this up! I
promise that due to the generosity from sponsor in the banking community I shall be better
equipped to update this site quicker. Last weeks game should be up soonish and I promise to also
do a profile, sorry Joel!