�Hamlet Prince Of Denmark�
�By William Shakespeare�
�
Can�t stop�
I must continue�
my kind sir; indeed, the language doth entreat me to read on evermore�
*Cut to Flat, 30mins later*
*Terrence is pacing the stage he has manufactured using the wood slats, nails and hammer that Dom and D.M neglected in the roof space. He is wearing a cape made from insulation, and wield his Shakespeare like a weapon*
Terr: (as Horatio)
Now cracks a noble heart. � Goodnight, sweet prince;
And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest!
(As Himself) No! This will not work, oh woe is me, I flail amid mine misery�
Players � I would bring them hence and here we must take conference.
*At this moment Dom and D.M arrive home they walk through the door*
Dom: What the�? Oh, I don�t have time for this! *He sprints to the toilet*
Terr: Ahem, examine the wall hence, therin you�ll find my inference!
D.M: *Reading a message scrawled on the wall by charcoal* �Speaketh in Elizabethan or get thine buttock hence, foul knave!�
Err�
Terr: ErrETH!
D.M: Shit�eth. Of all the things he could findeth to replaceth doom, it had to be-eth this�eth� didn�t it.
Terr: Shut thine self up, and thou dost picketh up one copy of thine noblest script! Thou shalt be my Horatio, as I am thy lord the prince!
D.M: This is going to go on, isn�t it? I mean, you�re not just going to stop being addicted to Shakespeare at the end of this episode are you�
Terr: I cannot hear thee though I do try, perhaps because thou dost useth the English of a common man, Horatio. Instead, speak in thine Elizabethan tones, for then thou must recognise of mine ears.
*Dom enters*
Terr: Aha! Mine Beauty! Mine Ophelia! Cometh to mine bosom!
Dom: Shit. We left the Shakespeare inside didn�t we�
