Halloween SO2
One quiet day in Arlia………
It’s the day before Halloween. The group is discussing what to do. Most of them forgot to buy candy.
Rena: Oh! I forgot about Halloween. I didn’t buy any candy……. I better go now….
Claude: I don’t know what to go as…………
Dias: Go as yourself……. You’re scary enough.
Claude: You little……SWORD BOMBE-(zap)
Celine: Don’t start trouble. I’m going as a witch.
Jesse: um……… Yeah, oh……kay…………
Opera: I’m going as Cats.
Ernest: I’m going as the Zig pilot.
Chisato: Oh! ZERO WING! Bad translation. All your base are belong to us! You have no chance to survive make your time!
Jesse: heheheh….. Can’t forget about Zero Wing……….
Noel: I’m going to use silly string and devour everyone.
Rena: Jesse, could you drive me to Wal-Mart to pick up candy?
Jesse: Take my keys. Drive safely.
Claude: I wanna ride in the Miata!
Rena: Come with me.
Noel: I’m going too. I need to get silly string.
(The three of them leave in Jesse’s cool car.)
Opera: No Halloween is good without getting boozed up. I’m going to the bar. Ernest, you are coming with me.
Ernest: Uh……. Okay!
(They leave in their space pod)
Jesse: That leaves Curtain rod girl, melodramatic freak, nosy reporter, Helium addict, big-eared boy and Barrel fetish guy.
Celine: Where is Ashton anyways?
Dias: See that barrel?
(All looks at barrel)
Dias: There is a bunch of candy in there AND Ashton is in there as well.
Jesse: Who put him in there?
(Someone walks out of a room)
Precis: That would be me……
Chisato: Why?
Precis: He was eyeing me!
Celine: If anything, he would be eyeing ME, not YOU.
(Another person walks out of the room)
Celine: Grr……………
Jesse: Wait a minute. What were you two doing in the same room?
Precis: SHUT UP
Chisato: Uhhh…….. Sick……. You both are too young. I’m gonna throw up……….
(Chisato goes in the bathroom)
Jesse: Don’t go in there! You’re gonna catch Holy Hell!
Meanwhile on the road……….
Claude: Are we there yet?
Rena: NO! Shut your stinkin’ hole!
Claude: Are we there yet?
Rena: Why the @#$% do you keep on @#$%in’ insisting if we are @#$%in’ there yet! Just @#$%in’ shut your stupid @$#%in’ hole!!!!
Claude: FINE!
Noel: We are here!
(They walk inside……)
Rena: CANDY!!!!!!!
Noel: Fake eyes! I always wanted a pair!
Claude: Frankenstein costume for idiots! I want it!
Rena: I’m gonna get this candy……. It says………. Lemon Wacky Hello.
Claude: The costume comes with an instruction manual!
Noel: What’s this?
(Noel sees a big can of super duper uber silly string)
Noel: I’m getting it!
(They cash out and return to their car)
Meanwhile……… At the Café SO2 bar…………..
Ernest: Stop drinking!
Opera: Dun tail may wut two du.
Ernest: Seesh!
Opera: Anudda ‘SO2 super tequila’ pease……….
Bartender: Comin’ right up!
Ernest: NO MORE! I’LL PAY YOU 100 DOLLARS!
Bartender: Ok!
(They return in their pod)
Opera: I stole their bottle of Budweiser!
Ernest: What?!?!?!! You only talk normal when you are mentioning beer.
Opera: Yeah, what about it? I like beer!
(Their pod crashes)
Ernest: Damn! Uh-oh….. Kids are approaching……
Kid: Trick or treat!
Ernest: Here’s a trick! We have no treat!
Kid: You suck man.
Opera: I have a treat! Have some beer!
(Opera puts the bottle of beer in the kid’s bag)
Kid: Thank you!
Opera: It feels good to do a nice thing.
Ernest: You just gave a kid beer! That’s gonna lead to underage drinking!
Opera: Oh no………. I’ll turn him into a beehive!
Ernest: ACK! Never mind……. We are stranded.
Opera: I’m cold… Let’s keep warm by having-
Hullo: -Brent is a Jerk!-
Opera: -with each other.
Ernest: Okay!
Back on the road.
Rena: We are almost home.
Claude: Are we there yet?
Noel: Look, we are home.
(They go in the door)
Jesse: Hey guys!
Precis: Come on
Celine: SICK!
Jesse: That’s my line.
Meanwhile in the bathroom…….
Chisato: I don’t know why… They are too young for *barf*
Chisato: They should be playing board games *barf*
(Sounds are being heard from Precis’s room)
Precis: Keep it coming
(Chisato continues to barf twice as much)
Meanwhile in the living room………….
Claude: I can’t read these instructions….. Put left foot in hole A. What does ‘in’ mean?
Rena: Let me put this candy in a bowl.
Celine: Firebolt! I can’t light this candle in the jack-o-lantern!
Noel: Taste my silly string fury!
(Noel sprays silly string at kids outside)
Noel: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Kid: You are mean!
(Kid rings the bell)
Rena: Hello!
Kid: Trick or Treat give me candy!
Rena: Here it is. I hope you like it!
(Kid pops the candy in his mouth)
Kid: Duh…. Huh? Goo goo gah gah!
(Kid runs around in circles in the street and gets hit by Jesse)
Jesse: Oh my god! You poor thing! Did I hit you!
Kid: owwwwww… yeah………….
Jesse: Not you! My car! Are you ok?
Kid: I’m fine……….
Jesse: Shut up child……. My car needs help……
(Kid dies, Claude gets in the car, Jesse moves out of the way)
Claude: Take this!
(Claude runs over the kid, then shifts to reverse and runs over him again, over and over.)
Jesse: Hey!
Meanwhile one hour later………..
Rena: I’m all out of candy…………
Celine: I guess so……
Jesse: Claude! Get out of my car!
(Noel continues to spray)
Noel: HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAA!!!!!!
(Kids are roaming around on the street)
Kid 1: duh……….
Kid 2: uhh…………..
Jesse: It’s the candy! What are the ingredients?!?!?!?!
Rena: Let’s see….. Lemon…….Sugar……..Hello…………
Celine: A composite hallucinogen that targets active brain cells causing neurological damage.
Jesse: Wow………
Rena: Oh NO! I messed up the kids of this neighborhood!
THE END
My Halloween story. Thanks to Farwell
for Lemon wacky hello. E-mail me at [email protected]
if you like it.