SOD OFF! I'M A CHIP
EXPAT JOKES > ANIMALS 1
ONE LINERS
A baby seal walks into a bar and the barman asks, "What’ll ya have?" to which the seal replies, "Anything but a Canadian Club!"
A charity collector asked the surly householder if she could collect the envelope she had popped through the letterbox the previous day. "No, the dog ate It." he replied. "Would
you like another?" asked the lady. "No thanks," said the grouch, "the last made him sick".
A frog telephones the psychic hot line and is told, "you are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you." "Great!" said the frog,
"will I meet her at a party or what?" "No," said the psychic, "next term’s biology class."
How many animals can you find in a pair of knickers? 10 little piggies, 2 calves, 1 ass, 1 beaver, 1 pussy, some crabs and a dead fish nobody can find.
If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?
What did the elephant say to the naked man? It's cute but can you pick up peanuts with it?
What's the difference between a dachshund and a street vendor? The street vendor bawls his wares out on the pavement!
What's pink and hard? A Pig with a flick knife.
Why did the chicken cross the football pitch? He heard that the referee was blowing fowls.
Why did the guy call his dog Herpes? Because he wouldn't heel.
Why did the guy call his one legged dog Woodbine? So he can take him for a drag.
A bloke in Australia walks up to the bar with a big ostrich behind him, and as he sits, a small cat jumps up on the stool beside him. The barman comes over, regarding the trio with some
curiosity, and says, "What'll it be?" The man says, "I'll have a pint", and turns to the ostrich, "What's yours?" "I'll have a pint as well." says the ostrich.
Bloke looks at the cat, and says, "I suppose you want a drink, too." The cat replies, "I'll have a half, but I ain't payin'!" So the barman pulls two and a half pints, and says,
"That'll be three pounds forty, please." The man reaches into his pocket, feels around, and, to the barman's surprise, pulls out exactly the three-forty in change.
A while later, the same thing happens, and the man pulls the exact amount out of the same pocket. The next day, the man, the ostrich, and the cat return to the same bar. "I'll have a pint,"
says the man. "Same for me," says the ostrich. The cat orders up a half and says, "But I ain't payin'!" Repeat of yesterday. The bloke pays each time with the exact amount from his
pocket.
This becomes almost a regular routine until, late one evening, the trio enter again. "The same?" asks the barman. "Well," says the man, "it's close to last orders. I'll have a
large scotch." He turns to the ostrich enquiringly. The bird says, "I'll have a large scotch as well." The cat says, "I'll have a small scotch...but I ain't payin'!" The
barman rings up the drinks and turns, with a sly grin, "That'll be seven pounds twenty, please." To his amazement, the man pulls the exact seven and twenty out of his pocket.
As the trio are finishing their drinks, the barman can't contain his curiosity any longer. "Excuse me, sir, but before you leave there's something I must know...how do you manage to always come
up with the exact change out of your pocket...every time?" "Well", says the man, "it's a long story. But basically, several years ago I took care of an old lady well into her
nineties, and when she died, she left me her old house. Nothing special, but as I was cleaning out the attic, I found an old lamp, and when I rubbed it, this genie appeared and offered me two
wishes." "That's fantastic," says the barkeep, "What did you wish for?"
"If I ever need to pay for anything, I just put my hand in my pocket and the right money will always be there." "That's brilliant," says the barman, "most people would wish
for a million pounds or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live." "That's right, whether its a quart of milk or even a Rolls Royce, the exact money is
always there. The best thing I ever did!"
As he turns to go, the barman calls him back and says, "One last thing, sir... err, your friends there... we don't get many cats or ostriches drinking in here...?" The man looks glum.
"Yes, I know. That's probably the worst thing I ever did, but I'm stuck with them. You see, for my second wish from the genie, I asked for a chick with long legs and a tight pussy."
SOD OFF! I'M A CHIP
A panda walks into a fancy restaurant and eats a fantastic dinner. When it finishes, it gets up, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter! It then leaves the restaurant in a hurry.
Hours later, the police catch up with the panda and ask it why it committed such an atrocious crime?! The panda just shrugs and tells the police to "Go look up 'panda' in the dictionary."
They do, and it reads: "Panda...a black and white animal that eats shoots and leaves."
PULL OUT! YOU'VE HIT AN ARTERY!
IF YOU ARE UNHAPPY...
Once upon a time there was a non-conforming sparrow that decided not to fly South for the winter.
However, soon the weather turned so cold that he reluctantly had to fly south. In a short time ice began to form on his wings and he fell into a farmyard almost frozen to death.
A cow passed by and crapped on the little bird. The sparrow thought it was the end, but the manure warmed him and defrosted his wings.
Warm and happy, able to breathe he started to sing, just then a large cat hearing the chirping came by and investigated the sounds.
The cat cleared away the manure, found the chirping bird and ate him.
The moral of the story:
Everyone who shits on you is not necessarily your enemy.
Everyone who gets you out of the shit is not necessarily your friend.
If you're warm and happy in a pile of shit, keep your mouth shut.
The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on his face.
The egg looking a bit pissed off, grabs the sheet, rolls over and says " Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question!
A pheasant was standing in a field chatting to a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of yonder tree', sighed the pheasant ,'but I haven't got the energy'. 'Well, why don't
you nibble on some of my droppings?' replied the bull. 'They're packed with nutrients'. The pheasant pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first
branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. And so on. Finally, after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Whereupon he
was spotted by a farmer who dashed into the farmhouse, emerged with a shotgun, and shot the pheasant right out of the tree.
The Moral of the Story: Bullshit might get you to the top,. but it won't keep you there!
A horse and a rabbit are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mudhole and is sinking. He calls to the rabbit to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety. The rabbit runs
to the farm but the farmer can't be found. So he drives the farmer's Mercedes back to the mudhole and ties some ropes around the bumper. He then throws the other end of the rope to his friend, and
drives the car forward saving him from sinking! A few days later, the rabbit and horse were playing in the meadow again and the rabbit fell into the mudhole. The rabbit yelled to the horse to go and
get some help from the farmer. The horse said, "I think I can stand over the hole!" So he stretched over the width of the hole and said, "Grab my dick and pull yourself up." The
rabbit did and pulled himself to safety.
The moral of the story: If you're hung like a horse, you don't need a Mercedes.
A farmer is sitting in the neighbourhood bar getting pissed. A man comes in and asks the farmer, "Hey, why are you sitting here on this beautiful day getting drunk?"
Farmer: Some things you just can't explain.
Man: So what happened that is so horrible?
Farmer: Well if you must know, today I was sitting by my cow milking her. When the bucket was about full, she took her left leg and kicked it over.
Man: That's not so bad, what's the big deal?
Farmer: Some things you just can't explain.
Man: So then what happened.
Farmer: I took her left leg and tied it to the post on the left with some rope. Then I sat down and continued to milk her. Just as I got the bucket about full again she took her right leg and kicked
it over.
Man: Again?
Farmer: Something's you just can't explain.
Man: So, what did you do then?
Farmer: I took her right leg and tied it to the post on the right.
Man: So then what did you do?
Farmer: I sat back down and continued to milk her, and just as I got the bucket just about full, the stupid cow knocks over the bucket with her tail.
Man: Wow you must have been pretty upset!
Farmer: Some things you just can't explain.
Man: So then what did you do?
Farmer: Well I didn't have any more rope, so I took off my belt and tied her tail to the rafter, then my pants fell down and then my wife walked in.
Never be alone again
The INFLATABLE SHEEP
If you're tired of chasing her all over the farm and then finding she's not in the mood.
(Sole Distributor: - Taffy Williams Imports Ltd.)
Features:-
Kissable lips
Runs on mains or batteries.
Deluxe Model with thicker coat for better grip
Proudly made in New Zealand
Bleating sounds from the latest Digital electronics (Use the plug in your Walkman's headphones)
Specially suitable for flat dwellers (Also available in MALE models)
Edge of the cliff function so that she pushes back that little bit harder.
Supplied with free set of Gumboots (specify size) and lanolin spray for the authentic shearing shed smell
YOUR FANTASIES CAN COME TRUE !
A Cowboy meets an Indian herding sheep in the Black Hills.
Cowboy: "Hey, cool dog you got there. Mind if I speak to him?"
Indian: "Dog don't talk."
Cowboy: "Hey dog, how's it going?"
Dog: "Doin' all right."
Indian: (Look of shock!)
Cowboy: "Is this Indian your owner?" (pointing at the Indian)
Dog: "Yep."
Cowboy: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play."
Indian: (Look of total disbelief)
Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Indian: "Horse no talk."
Cowboy: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Cool."
Indian: (Extreme look of shock!)
Cowboy: "Is this your owner?" (pointing to the Indian)
Horse: "Yep."
Cowboy: "How's he treat you?"
Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking, he rides me brushes me down often, and keeps me in a lean-to to protect me from the elements."
Indian: (Look of total amazement)
Cowboy: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Indian: "Sheep lie."
Why Sheep are Better than Women
Sheep don't have a gag reflex, or upper teeth.
You can get a better grip on a sheep's ear.
Sheep don't shy away from boots and leather.
Cottonmouth is easier to get rid of than a social disease.
Nuttin' beats mutton.
Sheep won't argue about whose turn it is to go get a towel.
Sheep won't drink your liquor, smoke your weed, snort your coke, and then tell you they have to be home early.
Sheep never ask if you're ready to settle down.
Sheep never ask about you former lovers and then get pissed off when you tell them.
Don’t worry Mary, you’re next
A woman is walking past a pet shop where she notices a sign:
"Good home needed for clitoris-licking frog."
The woman goes inside and says to the shopkeeper,
"I noticed you have a clitoris-licking frog? I'll take one."
He packages up a frog. The woman sneaks out the door and rushes home. She gets home... takes out the instructions and reads them carefully doing exactly what it says to do.
To her surprise, nothing happens. So, she thought, perhaps the scent she chose is not appealing to the frog... So, she showers again... and tries another perfume. She gets back into bed, puts the
frog between her legs and, NOTHING.
She's totally frustrated and pissed off at this point. She reads the instructions again thinking that there might be something she overlooked. At the bottom of the paper it says... If you have any
problems or questions, please call the pet store. So, she does. The man behind the counter says, "I've had a few complaints earlier today, I'll be right over to check out the problem". A few
minutes later he knocks on the door. He enters and says, "You'll have to show me exactly what you did". She does. She showers, puts on the perfume and the Teddy, gets into bed... and puts
the frog between her legs. NOTHING HAPPENS.
She says, "see, I've done everything according to the instructions and the damn thing just sits there." The man looking very concerned, picks up the frog, looks directly into its eyes and
says, "I'M ONLY GOING TO SHOW YOU HOW TO DO THIS ONE MORE TIME!"
A woman is walking past a pet shop where she notices a sign:
"Good home needed for clitoris-licking frog."
The woman goes inside and says to the shopkeeper,
"I noticed you have a clitoris-licking frog?"
"Oui madame..."
THE MOST VENOMOUS SNAKE IN THE WORLD
NAME: Expectoria trouserius (trouser snake)
LOCATION: Throughout the world
SYMPTOMS: This snake attacks mainly women in lower front abdomen, resulting in an inconspicuous bump then a severe swelling, followed by excruciating pain after 9 months. The attack is not usually
fatal.
It has been known to-attack men in the rear, lower abdomen, resulting in an incurable disease and consequent death.
HABITAT: Usually found in bedrooms, but has been known to appear in the most unusual places.
ANTIDOTE: Various types of vaccine available for women. However, once the venom is injected into the body only drastic measures will ensure complete recovery. There is no known antidote for men.
WHAT TO DO WHEN ATTACKED:
TOURNIQUET: Do not apply a tourniquet, as the venom is too deep in the body to be affected.
CUTTING THE WOUND: This would be completely unnecessary and ineffective as bleeding will stop after a few weeks anyhow
SUCKING THE WOUND: This method is the most popular with the victim, but so far has not been reported to have lead to any success.
MILKING THE SNAKE:
1. Place four fingers of the right hand around the neck of the reptile with the thumb in the front.
2. Grip firmly and move the hand in an upward and downward motion.
3. This will, result in the snake becoming very aggressive and start spitting.
4. The time taken for this milking process depends entirely on the milker and the last time the snake attacked.
5. Once milked the snake should be harmless for about 20 minutes.
CONCLUSION: This snake, although it is very aggressive and active, is not necessarily a vermin, and treated with the right respect, makes a wonderful pet.
A man gets on a plane and takes his seat, only to realise that the occupant of the seat next to him is a parrot. The plane takes off and after some minutes a stewardess approaches.
"Can I get you anything, sir?" she asks the man.
"Yes, I'll have a coffee, please, when you have a minute. Thank you."
"And for you, sir?" she asks the parrot. "A double whisky and coke, bitch, and make it quick, I'm thirsty!" demands the parrot
The stewardess returns a few minutes later with the parrot's drink, which he snatches without a word.
"Excuse me," says the man, "but I ordered a coffee". "Did you, sir? I'm sorry, I'll get you one straight away."
By which time the parrot has finished his drink.
"Anything else for you, sir?" the stewardess asks the parrot. "Yeah, I want another double whisky and coke, tart. Quick, bitch, I can't wait all night!"
Again the stewardess returns with the parrot's drink and without the coffee.
Naturally the man thinks the only way he is going to get any service is to adopt the attitude of his fellow passenger.
"Listen here you stupid slapper," he says to the stewardess, "I want my bloody coffee and I want it now, you cow!"
Two minutes later the stewardess returns, but this time with two enormous security guards, who proceed to manhandle the man and the parrot to the back of the plane, opens the door and ejects them from
the plane. As they hurtle uncontrollably towards earth from 6 miles up the parrot turns to the man and says, "You're a bit of a gobby bastard for someone who can't fly, aren't you!"
Once upon a time, there were 3 little ducks who lived by a peaceful pond.
One day they got into trouble and were sent to Bob, the duck who was in charge of the pond.
The first one stepped up in front of Bob and looked shamefaced.
Bob asked, "What’s your name?" The little duck replied, "Duck."
Why did you get sent to me?" queried Bob. "I was blowing bubbles in the pond," replied Duck
"You know you’re not supposed to do that it’s against the rules. You’re suspended from the pond for one week." Duck waddled away.
The second duck approached Bob. "What’s your name?" Bob asked. The little duck replied, "Duck Duck." Why did you get sent to me?" Bob asked. "I was blowing bubbles in
the pond," answered Duck Duck. "You know you’re not supposed to do that, it’s against the rules. You’re suspended from the pond for one week." Duck Duck waddled away.
Now Bob was pretty smart and thought he had discovered a pattern.
When the third duck waddled up to him, Bob said, "Let me guess. You’re Duck Duck Duck?"
"No," replied the little duck. "I’m Bubbles."
Two farmers are out rounding up sheep when all of a sudden a ewe takes off and goes wild, it runs into a fence and gets its head stuck. The two farmers go over to the fence and one says to the other, "this is too good a chance to miss." He unzips his pants, and screws the hell out of the ewe for at least 10 minutes. When he finally finishes he looks up at his partner and asks him if he wants some of it. His partner replies, "hell yes, that looks pretty good". He drops his pants and sticks his head in the fence.
A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. He carries his trusty 22-gauge rifle with him. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear
is gone. A moment later the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "No one shoots at me and gets away with it.
You have two choices: I can rip your throat out and eat you, or you can drop your trousers, bend over, and I'm going to f*ck you!"
The hunter decides that anything is better than death, so he drops his trousers and bends over, and the bear does what he said he would do. After the bear has left, the hunter pulls up his trousers
again and staggers back into town. He's pretty mad.
He buys a much larger gun and returns to the forest. He sees the same bear, aims, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says,
"You know what to do."
Afterwards, the hunter pulls up his trousers, crawls back into town, and buys a bazooka. Now he's really mad. He returns to the forest, sees, the bear, aims, and fires. The force of the bazooka blast
knocks him fat on his back. When the smoke clears, the bear is standing over him and says, "You're not doing this for the hunting, are you?"
Once upon a time Badger and Toad went down to Soho to see the nightlife. A few days after their trip they are discussing their exploits. Badger tells Toad "I went to China Town, and now my prick has turned yellow", Toad answers "what a coincidence, so did I and my prick has turned yellow as well, I’m visiting the hospital tomorrow, why don’t you come along too?" Sure enough, next day they both go down to the hospital, Toad goes to the receptionist first, explains his problem, and is directed to the STD department, next Badger goes to the receptionist, explains his problem, and is told to go to the STD department, "which way is that?" Says Toad, the receptionist replies" Oh, just follow the yellow prick toad!"
Here kitty, kitty, kitty
Declan the humble crab and Kate the Lobster princess were madly, deeply and passionately in love. For months they enjoyed an idyllic relationship, until one day Kate scuttled over to Declan
in tears. "We can't see each other anymore," she sobbed. "Why ?" gasped Declan. "Daddy says that crabs are too common," she wailed. "He claims you, a mere crab, and
a poor one at that, are the lowest class of crustacean, and that no daughter of his will marry someone who can only walk sideways."
Declan was shattered, and scuttled away into the darkness to drink himself into a filthy state of aquatic oblivion. That night the great Lobster ball was taking place. Lobsters came from far and wide
dancing and merry making, but the lobster Princess refused to join in, choosing instead to sit by her father's side, inconsolable. Suddenly the doors burst open, and Declan the crab strode in. The
Lobsters all stopped their dancing, the Princess gasped and the King Lobster rose from his throne. Slowly and painstakingly, Declan the crab made his way across the floor, and all could see that he
was walking FORWARDS, one claw after another!! Step by step he made his approach towards the throne, until he finally looked King lobster in the eye. There was a deadly hush. Finally, the crab
spoke..... "Fuck me, I'm pissed."
Howard had felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't. The guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming. But every once in a while he'd hear that soothing voice trying to reassure him - "Howard. Don't worry about it. You aren't the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients and you won't be the last." ... But invariably the other voice would bring him back to reality "Howard. You're a vet."
This bloke was getting on a bit, living alone, and was very sad and lonely. So he went to the pet shop and asked the assistant for a pet that would keep him company through his twilight
years whilst not needing too much care and attention. The shop assistant said "I have the very thing, quite special you know" and produced a cardboard box, inside was a millipede.
"What's so special about that?" asked the man. The assistant replied "its a talking millipede". The man was mightily impressed and bought the terrestrial crustacean. Back at home
the guy thought let's see what this is all about then and opened the box. He asked the millipede "shall we go to the pub then?" but got no reply. He asked the question again but still his
new pet said nothing. He sat back and pondered his acquisition and considered taking it back to the pet shop, but decided to give it one more attempt at least. Looking into the box he asked again
"So are we going to the pub then?"
The millipede replied "All right, for fucks sake, I'm just putting my shoes on".
What are you grinning at?
Bob is amazed to see a gorilla sitting in the oak tree in front of his house.
He wastes no time looking up "Gorilla Removal" in the yellow pages. He calls the service, and in nothing flat a truck pulls up with the words "JOE's GORILLA REMOVAL" written on the
side.
A man gets out of the truck carrying a loaded pistol and he has a fierce looking German shepherd on a leash.
"Now here's the plan," Joe tells Bob. "You hold the gun and I'll climb up the tree and shake the big ape out. When the gorilla falls to the ground, the German shepherd will attack him
and go for his private parts. After that, I just throw him in the back of my truck. Any questions?"
"Just one," says Bob. "What's the gun for?"
"If I fall out of the tree, shoot the dog!"
A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep.
Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it.
He told them to knock it off and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in.
"OK, follow me," he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him.
Down through a valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees.
Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him.
"Now, do you see that tree over there?" he asked.
"Yes, yes, yes!" the bats all screamed in a frenzy.
"Good," said the first bat, "Because I SURE AS HELL DIDN'T!"
African Artillery
A circus owner runs an ad for a lion tamer and two young people show up. One is a good looking guy in his mid- twenties and the other is a gorgeous blonde about the same age.
The circus owner tells them, "I'm not going to sugar coat it. This is one ferocious lion. He ate my last tamer so you both better be good or you're history. Here's your equipment - a chair, a
whip, and a gun. Who wants to try out first?"
The girl says, "I'll go first."
She walks past the chair, the whip and the gun and steps right into the lion's cage. The lion starts to snarl and pant and begins to charge her, so she throws open her coat revealing her beautiful
naked body. The lion stops dead in his tracks, sheepishly crawls up to her and starts licking her ankles. He continues to lick her calves, kisses them, and then rests his head at her feet. The circus
owner's mouth is on the floor.
He remarks, "I've never seen a display like that in my life." He then turns to the young man and asks, "Can you top that?"
"No problem," replies the young man, "just get that lion out of the way."
DEEP THOUGHT
If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it)
If you "break wind" consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (Now that's more like it)
The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet
(OMG...!)
A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. (In my next life I want to be a pig) (How'd they figure this out, and why?)
Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (Don't try this at home...maybe at work?) (Still can't get over that pig thing)
Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. (Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)
(And pigs get 30-minute orgasms? Doesn't seem fair)
The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hmmmmmmmmm........)
Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people. (If you're ambidextrous do you split the difference?)
The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated. (From drinking little bottles of...?) (Did taxpayers pay for this
research??)
Polar bears are left handed. (Who knew....? Who cares? How'd they find out, ask them?)
The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds. (What can be so tasty on the bottom of the pond?)
The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes...can you imagine?? And why pigs?)
A cockroach will live nine days without its head, before it starves to death. (Creepy)
The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off. (Honey, I'm home. What the....)
(Well, at least pigs get a break there...)
Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(In my next life I still want to be a pig... quality over quantity)
Butterflies taste with their feet. (Oh, geez) (That's almost as bad as catfish)
Elephants are the only animal that cannot jump. (OK, so that would be a good thing....)
A cat's urine glows under a blacklight. (I wonder who was paid to figure that out.)
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (I know some people like that.)
Starfish don't have brains. (I know some people like that too.)
After reading all these, all I can say is.............
...lucky pigs...
A Cajun was stopped by a game warden in Southern Louisiana recently with two ice chests of fish, leaving a bayou well known for its fishing.
The game warden asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?"
"Naw, ma fren, I ain't got none of dem, no. Dese are my pet fish."
"Pet fish?!"
"Ya. Avery night I take dese here fish down to de bayou and let dem swim round for a while. I whistle and dey jump rat back into dere ice chests and I take dem home."
"That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do that!"
The Cajun looked at the game warden for a moment and then said, "It's de truth ma' fren, I'll show you. It really works."
"Okay, I've GOT to see this!"
The Cajun poured the fish in to the bayou and stood and waited.
After several minutes, the game warden turned to him and said, "Well?"
"Well, what?" said the Cajun. "When are you going to call them back?"
"Call who back?"
"The FISH."
"What fish?"
The Happy Angler