QUOTES
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Nocturne: Jumpy ain’t we? Relax, I rarely fight people in my underwear, how they got in my underwear I’ll never know…
Blink: You look like Nightcrawler.
Nocturne: And so do you, kind
of. But my excuse is probably more
reasonable.
Blink: I didn’t know he had a daughter…. Although you tend to get used to surprises, life being what it is.
Morph: A beach? Great. And me without my sun block.
Morph: Well, someone’s a wee bit
over stimulated. No more cappuccinos
for you.
Morph: I am never one to stop a woman from emphatically pressing herself against me – and by all means, continue, but who are you?
Morph: She stopped with the
hugging. I shouldn’t have said anything. What about you gorgeous? Want some
sugar?
Morph: I did the e-ticket ride,
fell down here in Miami, and that’s when you started groping me.
Nocturne: Ditto for me. Minus the hugging and the druid with flaming tootsies. I was in bed.
Nocturne: James, is that you?
Thunderbird: No, John, John
Proudstar.
Nocturne: Oh, John, wow, you remind
me of your brother James.
Thunderbird: James is dead.
Nocturne: James? No, he’s not! I saw him last night, you’re the one who’s supposed to be…I mean.
Morph: You following any of this?
Blink: Not particularly.
Nocturne: ‘Casper the changeling’
here was never a member of the X-men.
Mimic: Hi gang. Are you all as lost as I am?
Nocturne: A zillion years ago, he
was an x-men, for like ten minutes.
Time Broker: What are your guts telling
you? That this is not a dream. I’m not the threat. No one is messing with your noggins and this
is not some ruse of a super baddie.
This is real and you are in some serious trouble.
Time Broker: Now, could you please put me down?
I have muffins burning.
Morph: So are you a fan of these Butt Monkeys’ or do you just dig the fit of the jersey?
Nocturne: They’re my band, and
you’re just looking for an excuse to look at my chest.
M: True enough.
Blink: What’s coffee?
Nocturne: You don’t know what coffee is?
Blink: I spent my life in a war zone, I haven’t had real toilet paper since I was in prison.
Nocturne: Oh you’re going to be a
lot of laughs.
Nocturne: Nice flat TV.
Morph: Can we watch porn?
Time Broker: Nope.
Time Broker: In some worlds, you individual
life essence is the opposite sex, in some, you’re apes, in some just protozoa,
in others, mere energy signals.
Morph: You just know the chick me
is hot.
Time Broker: I’m how your minds are dealing
with this trauma.
Thunderbird: Trauma?
Time Broker: Oh yeah, you’re freaking out.
Magnus: Where exactly are we?
Blink: Thirty-three miles outside
of Phoenix.
Mimic: How do you know that?
Blink: I read it.
Magnus: Hey gang, let’s go
shopping.
Morph: You were both wearing more
clothing before the new outfits.
Nocturne: John-John actually found his in one of those ‘Big gals’ clothing stores. But I promised not to tell as long as he didn’t mention he saw me naked.
Morph: You care that he saw you naked, Cha-cha?
Nocturne: No, but I wanted him to
feel like he had leverage.
Nocturne: This is not going according to plan! What happened to that ‘stealth approach’ everyone was going on about?
Morph: Morph want go now. Him get shot at more that Madonna by
Paparazzi.
Blink: Another hour, we’ll be
good. It’s not every day the worlds most
powerful psychic tries to turn your brain into tuna fish.
Magnus: Sensors, detectors and
alarms made of metal. Don’t worry. You couldn’t phone for Pizza if you wanted
to.
Morph: My my my, Mr. Forge…You’ve
built yourself quite the digs. Is this
part of the benefits package of being this generations Dr Mengele?
Domino: They sat idley by and let it all
happen! They voted for laws to sterilize
us! To terminate our pregnancies! To imprison us all!
Morph: These Wall street
monkeys? Nah! They just crunch dot-coms and dress poorly! I mean the solid coloured tie thing has to
go.
Magnus: You’ll be safe on the
beach. I’ll transport the prisoners and
shield everyone from the blast. Magneto’s
not my father. But all the same…pleases
don’t tell him who I was, it wouldn’t be fair
Morph: You’re really handy for a scary,
morose bringer-of-death type, ya know?!
Thunderbird: Shut up
Morph: Shutting up!
Magnus: Charming! An a-Bomb made completely from plastic
components. Apparently father, they
feared you, most of all. You’ll prove
them wrong, dad.
Nocturne: And what about the time
line of Magnus’s reality? Did he set things right? If he could die, then…
Morph: Hey! New chick on deck!!
Morph: Wow ‘Out with the old’…thanks
for the grace period…
Sunfire: You’ve got about five minutes
to butch up and help us break in to Mojo’s stronghold, Nancy boy.
Sasquatch: “Sasquatch bust down
the door.” “Sasquatch clock that
guard.” “Sasquatch go carry
Longshot.” I know I’m the powerhouse,
but lets divide up the chores, okay?
Morph: Any idea where general Blubber butt is. Before a show he usually gives some idiotic pep talk. The Ethel Merman “There’s no business like show business” meets Mussolini’s “You’ll do what I say, or I’ll cut your arms off” thing…
Nocturne: I’m feeling friendly. Probably because I’m wearing a thong.
Sunfire: Oh sure, we beat the
snot out of the entire battalion and break down the wall and suddenly he grows
a pair.
Blink: It’s always nice to get an apology from a construct of our collective consciousness.
Iron man: Super beings that jump from reality
to reality righting wrongs? Talk about a load of crap.
Iron man: Anyone blinks and they get a repulsor
ray in the head.
Spider: ‘Blinks’, Interesting
choice of words.
Gambit: Shut up spider.
Spider: If we really wanted to
whack you, you’d already be Spam in a can.
Iron man: I’d say that I’ve got you covered.
She-hulk: Yes, I’d say he could
probably kill us.
Vision: Except me.
She-hulk: Yes except you, Vision,
you indestructible #$%^@.
Gambit: The hell--?
Iron man: Sorry… my bad…
Vision: My sensors detected a guard
activating a neural dampener. I inferred
that he planned to disable one or all of us.
Gambit: So then why were you shooting
Angel? You don’t have any scanners.
Angel: Vision started it.
Spider: ‘Willingness to act’. A political euphemism for vaporizing a dude’s
head, right, Hulk?
She-hulk: Shut up Spider.
Spider: Ah come on, you’re the
Prez…you don’t like someone you can just drop a nuke on him.
Iron man: No that would just piss him off.
Storm: You killed one hulk and
created someone just as strong as him, didn’t you?
Iron man: A little stronger.
Iron man: That tallus certainly is something.
Spider: Don’t get any smart
ideas. That thing doesn’t like to go
walking off. Doctor octopus tried
snatching it from us once and all it left of him was calamari.
Vision: Calamari is squid. It is an incorrect reference for Doctor
Octopus.
Spider: Hey check it out! Spock’s
critiquing humor!
Spider: God it’s like some
freaked out sitcom. “He’s a monster,
she’s a witch and he’s a crippled sorcerer.
They’re…Chillin’ in Paradise.”
Vision: We must act in haste.
Angel: Y’think? I was hoping to
make waffles…you egotistical, over bred microwave oven…
Scarlet Witch: Maybe you can explain to me what
you’re all doing here, “Mother nature” since you’re supposed to be dead. Storm, I watched you die following the fascist
leadership of my father, Magneto. And
gambit…you were always on our side.
Spider: How ‘bout me hot stuff? Did
I go down swinging in the big war, or was I smart enough to dodge the big
draft? Did I head to Canada? Mexico?
Tell me I went to Mexico!!
Colossus: I am called Colossus. I have become displaced in time. The Timebroker…
Spider: We know. Just hang on a sec’. It’s Angel’s turn to give the run down to
the newbies.
Gambit: I could do it.
Spider: No, rules are rules, it’s
Angel’s turn.
Magik: “These things just
happen?” I’d kick his butt if he wasn’t a construct of our collective
consciousness.
Morph: Heather and I only spent about an hour fighting wolverine in his most rabid, crack-head, testosterone laden state ever. It was like a birthday party, except no cake and blood and spitting. And all in Canada. Whoopee.
Magik: What’s a Brood?
Morph: Oh, just the nastiest alien race you ever faced. Giant insects from hell, really.
Mimic: I’m a one man wrecking crew,
remember?
Time Broker: Ok campers, enough of the Exiles
reunion hour. It’s showtime.
Morph: Um gang, does anybody else think it’s a real bad idea for us to be exposed to cosmic rays?
Magik: It’s an absorbsion spell
guys, it’ll draw in any radiation and keep us clean…I hope.
Ben Grimm: Well spank me and call me Alice.
Morph: Maybe later, big man.
Sue Richards: I…I’m disappearing, Reed help…
Nocturne: It’s okay Sue, it’s okay. That’s all you, girl. This is the first step. But maybe this time you should call yourself the invisible woman right from the get-go.
Morph: Tell the gang at Yancy Street to call witness protection.
Magik: Yes! I’ve always wanted to know if my soulsword
could cut though his hide. Let’s hear it
for wacko alternate universes!