Exctasy Arcade Episode 3 "Roses Are Red..." Entry #69 The days went by, Jennifer grew closer to everyone. She became part of that dreaded DDR circle. A circle I was being pulled in to. I tried and I tried but I just couldn't escape it. Trying to please everyone, I decided on holding a DDR tournament..... Jackie - Yeah... June 8th... That's when the tournament will be. Jason - Cool. Mike - Awesome. Jennifer - Hooray. Daniel - *sweat pouring from all parts of his body* Yippee. RJ - Russ - C. Jackie - So spread the word. This tournamnet is going to BE HUGE. I have a huge announcement planned to make this tournament HUGE! Jason - How HUGE can it get? Jackie - About 2 inches... Oh... The tournament, you'll see. Jason - *blush* Mike - When will you make this HUGE announcement? Jackie - TOMORROW!!! *tomorrow* (Knock on the office door. Jackie opens up. It's Jason.) Jason - So... What's the HUGE announcement? Jackie - Oh.... Yeah.. Uh...... (Melanie walks up. She is ready to work.) Jackie - Oh.. Hey Melanie. Melanie - Like Hey Jackie! Like I'm ready to work! Duh! Jason - You're stupid. Melanie - *staring off into space* (Jackie snaps his fingers in front of Melanie's face.) Melanie - Oh! Like that was loud! My god. Where am I? Oh yeah. WORK!! HAHAHAHHA!!! (Jason and Jackie stare at each other.) Melanie - So! What's up! I'm so ready to work! Jackie - Yeah..... Go clock in. Melanie - Like so I can make money! Oh my god! (Melanie walks into the office. The door closes.) Jason - She is strange. Jackie - Very much so. (All of a sudden we here a knock on the office door..... yet it comes from the inside. Jackie and Jason stare at each other. Jackie gets his key and opens the door.) Melanie - Like... I tried to clock in but I totally lost my mind. How do I do it? I mean.... I think you hit this button but it just doesn't work. I mean! Like! Oh my god! So what do I do and when do I do it? Jackie - Calm down. It will be alright. Melanie - But I'm so freaking out because I want to make money and like I can't make money until I clock in and I forgot how. I'm so confused. Jackie - It's ok. It's ok.... Here, I'll clock you in. Melanie - Oh my god! Thank you! You are such a cool guy! Now I can make money! Where is my name tag! I totally need to like wear it oh my god! (Melanie puts on her name tag and walks outside. Karisa walks up to Melanie.) *for those of you with IQ's greater than 10, you might want to skip this next part.* Karisa - Like Hello! Melanie - Like Oh My God! Karisa - Like What's Up Totally? Melanie - Like.... SO.... Much! Karisa - Like really!??!?! Melanie - Like totally!!!! Karisa - OH MY GOD!!! Melanie - Like Yeah! Karisa - SO totally Oh My God Like! Melanie - Yes! TOTALLY! OH..... MY........ GOD!!! Karisa - Like so like totally? Melanie - Definetly totally like so! Karisa - OH MY GOD! Melanie - OH MY GOD! (Just then Jennifer walks up.) Jennifer - Hey, is Jackie here? Melanie - OH MY GOD! HE TOTALLY IS! Jennifer - Ok...... Where is he? (Jason walks back up.) Jason - Hey guys. (Jackie comes out of the office. Everyone stares at him.) Jackie - What?! Jason - The HUGE announcement please? Jackie - Ok fine..... The HUGE announcement is that...... At the tournament we will have a very special guest. Jennifer - Who? Jackie - ........my long lost homosexual 7th cousin, Richard Simmions! Jason - Richard Simmions is your cousin? Jackie - Yeah... Long story. Melanie - That's like one of the biggest..... Oh my god! Karisa - Totally Like So! Entry #70 After I announced that Richard Simmions was coming to the DDR Tournament, everyone wanted to sign up. So I jacked up the price to 53 dollars a person to enter. I felt this was a fair price. I mean, they'd actually get to meet Richard Simmions!!! What more could anyone want out of life? So..... The tournament was set.... Here is how it shaped ups: match #1 Reggie vs. Jason match #2 Gaurav vs. RJ match #3 Pooja vs. Mike match #4 Daniel vs. Karisa match #5 James vs. Russ match #6 Brian vs. Jennifer The first round was horrible... So many bad things happened...... Richard Simmions called and said he couldn't make it until the second round... it was bad.... Match #1 (after the 2nd song) Reggie - *** damn it mother****** you ******* cheating you ******* son of a *****. I'm going to kick your ******* ***. Jason - How am I cheating? You just suck. Reggie - Oh them are fighting words you mother******* piece of ****. (Just then Reggie's mom walks up behind him, grabs him by the ear, and hauls him out of the mall screaming.) Reggie - No Mommy!!! Don't!!! I'm sorry!!! Wah! Wah! Result: Winner Jason via forfeit Match #2 (Gaurav has just picked his song. The song starts. Gaurav is dancing away. RJ is just... sitting there on the pad motionless. A gust of wind comes from nowhere and blows RJ over.) Result: Winner Gaurav via forfeit Match #3 (Pooja and Mike start out playing. Mike accidently steps on Pooja squashing her.) Result: Winnder Mike via...... injury Match #4 (Daniel and Karisa are playing. The first song ends and Daniel starts sweating. Sweat pours down onto the pad and all over the arcade floor. It just continues and continues. Karisa slips on the pad and falls down in the floor.) Karisa - Like. OW! (Daniel laughs as a horrid smell begins to fill the arcade. Everyone passes out.) Result: Winner Daniel via..... injury I guess. Match #5 (After many cans of lysol, the tournament continued. It was James against Russ. Lets pick it up after song 3.) Jackie - James.. You win! James - Cool. Russ - C. =( Result: Winner James Match #6 (The most anticipated first round match up... Brian against Jennifer. The homeless girl against... Well... Brian. Everything was going good until....) *in the middle of song 2* (Brian does a kick, but he accidently kicks Jennifer in the head, sending her flying out onto the mall floor. Everyone rushes to her aid.) Jason - Someone Mike - Call James - 9 Jackie - 1 Russ - C. (Everyone gathers around Jennifer. She slowly opens her eyes. She stares up.) Jennifer - Wha... Wha... What happened? Jackie - Brian kicked you... Are you ok? Jennifer - I... I... I... Think..... *passes out* (Just then Jon walks up.) Jackie - OH JON! JON! SAVE HER! Jon - What seems to be the problem? Jackie - Brian kicked her in the head... Jon - Oh.... I see.... This is an easy fix. Brian.... Come here.... (Brian walks over.) Jon - You kicked her, you must help her. Brian - But how. I am just a mere regular person. I'm not as great as you are. Jon - Oh, but everyone is great in their own way. Now... Kiss her. Brian - What?! Jon - Kiss her.... She must be cured by the person that did this to her. Brian - I have to kiss her? Jon - Yes. Brian - But she is a girl. Jon - So. Do you want her to be ok? Brian - Yeah.... Jon - Then kiss her. (Brian leans over and kisses Jennifer right on the lips. She opens her eyes. She wraps her arms around Brian. She kisses him back. They are lip locked on the floor. Everyone is sickened by the sight.) Jason - Oh get a room. Daniel - PORN! COOL! (Daniel pulls out his........ NEVERMIND.... NOT A GOOD IDEA) *rewind* Jason - Oh get a room. Daniel - PORN! COOL! Gaurav - EWWWWW!!! KISSING! (They continue to kiss. Just then what appears to be a little boy in a diaper walks in to the mall. He has on...... Wings? and he has..... A BOW? AND ARROWS?!?!? He pulls out one of his arrows and aims it at Jason. It hits Jason..... Jason looks down at Jennifer... His eyes fill with love... The little kid takes another arrow and hits Mike with it.... He looks at Jennifer... His eyes fill with love..... Yet another arrow.... shoot.... bang.... hits James.... looks at Jennifer.....etc...... Another arrow.... RJ... looks at Jennifer... More arrows!!! This one hits Brian.... He stops kissing Jennifer and looks up at.......at........ MELANIE!!! Another arrow..... across the arcade and it hits...... Some random old fat woman!!! She turns and looks..... AT KEITH!!! And finally... One arrow remains... The little kids looks around... He looks down at Jennifer... An arrow hits her... And she looks up..... AT JACKIE.......) Entry #71 And thus... It happened.... Damn that little kid and his arrows.... *to be continued* This episode was "shorter" because someone (Russ) complained about the length. Well I hope you are happy........ C. Episode 4: The aftermath of the little kid and his damned love arrows..... and the tournament continues..... plus much more exciting action... And for those of you that confuse easily (all of you)..... Jason, James, Mike, and RJ were all shot with arrows to make them love Jennifer. Brian loves Melanie. Some random old fat woman loves Keith. Jennifer loves Jackie. ...the fun continues soon...