Entry for November 13, 2007
I work tomorrow. I went to the UAW meeting tonight. I opened it. I did NOTHING today, as per plan. I didn't think at all about my problems. After the meeting, a fellow cult member gave me a ride home, and we talked for about a half an hour in front of my house. It helped me feel connected again. I was reminded today at the meeting of several things that can help me with my acceptance of my current situation. The Spiritual Axiom: How I react to any situation is based on my spiritual fitness. We also talked about the 3rd Step, and I was reminded one of the ways that I take my will back is listening to all the pros and cons of any situation, but making all the decisions myself. Listening to advice, sort of, but knowing that deep down, I am going to do whatever I want anyhow. Much of my problem is that I had expectations of how things were going to unfold, and when they didn't happen the way I wanted them to, I react like a child, throwing a temper tantrum. I also have expectations of people's advice, and when it doesn't coincide with what I want to hear, I react them same way. Today I did the best thing, nothing. I listened to what may come my way, without asking any questions. I heard: Spiritual Axiom and 3rd Step. Also, I must remember that even though self will shuts the door, willingness can open the door again.
