SUMMERS REPORT
06/11/01
It's time� it's time� it's Summers Time� time� time�. *key crummy dirge with too much base and too few notes* Thanks for indulging me. And sorry, it just seems that it's the week of indulgence here in the EWCL. What, the ratings drop for one week and Cazzo throws the show open to every whim of the superstars? Or did the writers have an almighty brain-fart?
So, it seems the financial woes continue for the "Dropkick King" and his band of merry men. Either this is all a work and will lead somewhere, or Cazzo is in real trouble and hasn't yet noticed that he's holding all of his secret financial meetings with a cameraman over his shoulder, beaming it into the households of several million fans worldwide. And that, people, doesn't inspire a lot of confidence in our leader.
And hey, did anybody else think� "What on earth is Mauler doing asking for a raise?!"
Okay, here are the "Hits" and "Misses" this week� Bitch, moan, complain, flame me in your promos� or just ignore me the way I ignore all of you. You are flotsam, I am the sea�.
Hits
Dan Prohibition and Kritical Kondition �
Sure, one might argue that losing two matches in one night pegs the former as a loser, and the mere fact that Corvik had to crawl to Prohibition for help spells the end of an illustrious career� but I'm not he. No, Prohibition took a stand tonight and let everybody know that he wasn't going to go quietly into the night while the rest of the card moved on without him. And Corvik seems to have had an epiphany during the week, and realised that he was going nowhere fast. These two are just what each of them need. These two have been, and can be, impact players. And the dynamic here� wow. Now just watch as they recapture their spots at the top.
Eddie "The Impact" Osbourne �
Eddie's on a roll, what can we say? But hey, is anybody else waiting for the EWCL to start piping an "Osbourne�Osbourne�Osbourne�Osbourne�" chant through the arenas and sticking the guy with a march? But seriously, give this guy time to re-establish himself and you're looking at a sure fire Main Event. Having said that before however, it may be just as likely he'll disappear next week. Time will tell�.
Misses
The Punisher �
"Mission Control� Punisher's descent into Hell has terminated with a fiery plummet to a place far worse� Please advise�."
I don't care if you're in the Main Event as some kind of special enforcer or not� when you go from holding the Universal Title to jobbing to The Mauler, then that's the end. The Punisher has no credibility left. Stick a fork in him�
He's done.
Star Wars "Retro" Night �
An entertaining promo led to an awful Venom that must have had the WCW (YES! I said it! I named a REAL promotion! They exist! HAHAHAHAH!!!!! You can't stop me� I'll name them all� WWF� ECW� NWA!!!!!! BWUHAHAHAHAH� Damn, here come the Feds�!) rolling over in its grave for poor gimmick theft infringement. Come on, let's not turn the show into a cartoon, please? Allow Exile to vent his insanity. He's a funny guy, and he can pull it off. But who told the writers to give it a whirl themselves? Lets not turn the Main Event into a joke. Having all the faces beaten down by Storm Troopers was terribly weak, and really had me wincing. If this is what we can expect from High Stakes, I believe the buy-rate will be very low. This was not a good way to build up a pay-per-view.
Ratings
Venom� 3.9� 'nuff said. Well, no, not really. I still have a paragraph to fill, so I'll say a little more. This show was poorly booked and ill conceived. And hey, there's a pay-per-view on? No kidding?! Are you serious?! Says who?! At no time did I feel I was watching the final Venom before a pay-per-view. Rather, this felt like a filler episode. Which, when you think about it, is hardly surprising seeing as the pay-per-view was only announced this week I think. Would it have hurt to plan ahead? I remember when you could mark the date of a pay-per-view on your calendar a month beforehand and still anticipate the matches. Booking on the fly is not the way to go when the company is allegedly in financial trouble. And frankly, does anybody expect Exile to lose the title to Cazzo? Is Cazzo that big an egomaniac? I don't think so� and I'm not the only "Smart" around. Expect a low buy-rate for High Stakes, 'cos lets face it boys and girls� the "Stakes" aren't all that high. This isn't a "must see", and right now that is exactly what Cazzo needs to be booking.
But, when the figures come in, at least Bo Lucas will have one more financial problem to complain to the President about two weeks from now.
This has been The Mike Summers Report. I really care what you all think, and encourage you to write to me on the OOC board, because I need to feel that you appreciate my work.
Nah. I'm Mike Summers� who the Hell are you?! See you in two�
Mike Summers