The Informer - WHAT A WEEK IT'S BEEN IN THE EXTREME WRESTLING ASSOCIATION! TITLE CHANGES! NASTY BRAWLS! NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCES� AND THE RETURN OF SERIAL THRYLLA! It makes you wonder what the heck is gonna happen here tonight! Hello fans, I'm The Informer, and I'm joined here in New Orleans by Vic Canon and "Don't Tell My Mother I Wet The Sheets" Eddie Sensation!

Eddie Sensation - Hey! What are you saying?!

The Informer - Ah, nothing� it slipped out, I'm sorry! Fans, tonight we've got another blockbuster card for ya! Vic, what do you think Tom Stone was thinking when he signed The EWA World Heavyweight Champion, The Hustler to team up with "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante� to face the team of former champ, "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington and Clayton Chandler!

Vic Canon - I think he was either in just a great mood, or he's nuts! There's no doubt that Stone is still out to calm the 3 Dimensions of Wrestling, and tonight's main event should do the trick!

Eddie Sensation - Oh, don't you worry! Diamante and The Hustler� they use to be friends, and I think they can put their differences aside for one night! Plus, we're gonna get to see Covington and The Hustler go at it again! This is nuts!

The Informer - Not to mention Chandler and Diamante going at it!

Vic Canon - Exactly! In other action, we've also got Fallen Angel defending his EWA International Title against Big Daddy Hack!

Eddie Sensation - That's right, baby! Hacker holds a victory over Fallen Angel, and I think tonight, he's gonna bring home the gold!

The Informer - But he'll have to keep one eye always looking for "The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante!

Vic Canon - What about the EWA Extreme Title match we've got scheduled for tonight!? Champion "The Franchise" Chris Jericho will take on Jason Chandler!

Eddie Sensation - Jason Chandler� Clayton Chandler, we've got one too many "Chandlers" around here! Maybe Jericho will take care of one tonight!

The Informer - In another tag team war, 2 of the 3 Dimensions, "The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante and Zed will square off against the team of Shawn Walker and Brett Bomb!

Vic Canon - That one should be interesting to say the very least! Zed has to keep his eyes open for Tom Stone!

Eddie Sensation - Ah, Zed can take care of Stone! Tommy needs to sit in his office and play chess or something! He has no right out here with the REAL athletes!

The Informer - Thurston Howell versus Rocky Blonde for a North American shot against Nuno Nitrowalawitz on Sunday� Clayton Chandler get's behind the mic� that and so much more! But let's start things off in the ring� with the one� the only� SERIAL THRYLLA!!!

The Informer - COULD THIS BE IT?!?! COULD THIS BE THE MOMENT WE'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR?!

[The letters D-F-A are shined down upon the ring.]

Eddie Sensation - Oh boy, Oh Boy! Dogs, Frogs, Arachnids!

[5 fuchsia and cyan colored pyro-bombs explode almost simultaneously. The crowd chants "D-F-A!, D-F-A!, D-F-A!"]

[The sounds of "Serial Thrilla" by Prodigy pours into the arena at a deafening decibel. Serial Thrylla emerges in street clothes, most notably a ReVoLuTiOn~X t-shirt, leather jacket, and trade mark cyan color lense Oakley sunglasses.]

The Informer - Listen to this capacity crowd here in New Orleans, Louisana on hand tonight!! THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE!!

[After grabbing the stick, Thrylla signals to audience, drawing a serene hush.]

Serial Thrylla - 10 months ago, I left a company behind because there was seemingly nothing left for me to accomplish, BUT to bolster my bank account. Well, 7 digits and 10 months of bordem later, I'm back. [Pause] Everyone knows the story, but few know why... Why come back to an EWA ring after all this time? Why come back to an EWA ring after all the glitz, the glamour, the fame? Why come back to an EWA ring when there's apparently nothing left to prove? Well, that answer is simple. It's time to do it all over again.

[Huge Pop from the crowd.]

Serial Thrylla - 10 months ago, I left only two men standing in a ring and left them the message of destiny. Shortly there after, those two men followed the same path as I. Now, we once again have our checks signed by the same man, Tom Stone. Coincidence? Maybe. All the smarks on the net, all the dirt sheets, and Wade Keller's of the world have offered their meaningless input on just what drew 3 of the biggest names in the game, back to the game. Well, my reason is simple... I missed true competition.

Vic Canon - He certainly has that right!

Serial Thrylla - The last two companies I worked for went under in less than 3 months. Sure, the money was there. I've become a very rich man by making David Fenichel's money and I became an even wealthier man working for "The Franchise" Shane Douglas for two weeks. However, the talent level in each organization was a joke and so were the idiots that ran them into the god damn crowd. Fenichel... Dougl-ass... Thank you for wasting my time and filling my bank book, Fuck You.

[The crowd begins to chant "E-W-A! E-W-A! E-W-A! E-W-A!"]

Serial Thrylla - And as for Mr. Dino Delsante... It'll be my pleasure to make your birthday very... very... unhappy.

[Huge Pop.]

Serial Thrylla - Now, if I wasn't mistaken last week.. I thought I walked in on an EWA World Championship match. But instead, it looked more like I was in the MCW judging by the total bullshit occuring in this very ring. After clearing that afternoon's lunch from my throat, I decided to make my way out to the ring to catch the lack of action taking place. Cory Cummington... So physically distraught with finally seeing his idol live and in living color, forgets he's in a snooze-fest with The Hustler. Then, I point to the cracker-jack concession man in the stands... Because, well, I was hungry as hell and I wanted to see if I could win a prize at the bottom of the box. The Jackass, Cory Cummington, thinks I'm pointing at him, which sends chills up and down his spine causing him to wet his underpants and get rolled up for the 1..2..3

[Mixed reaction coming from the crowd.]

The Informer - Wow... I don't think that was the case at all.... and His name is Cody..

Eddie Sensation - You know, I think Cummington was wearing huggies pull-ups earlier tonight!!

Serial Thrylla - As for The Hustler... The only champ I've ever seen stay after the show to break down the ring. Although I gotta say, that's one helluva replica title you bought. If you're the number one man and the number one franchise in the company, all I gotta say is, FWF... part deux. 'Cuz Stone's gonna be filing for bankruptcy in 8 weeks.

Vic Canon - The former champ is showing a serious lack of respect for the EWA's top two stars!!

Serial Thrylla - Since it seems both Cory and Kenny Rogers Gambler have deep seeded issues with me, I'm going to make a proposition. On April 16, 2000.... NC-17 "Pure Violence", the EWA's premier pay-per-view that I helped put on the fucking map... I think I'm going to invite myself to do a little...

[Pulls out a black and white striped shirt from leather jacket.]

Serial Thrylla - .....refereeing.

Vic Canon - WHAT?!?!

Serial Thrylla - In fact, I've already had a little negotiation with everyone's favorite canadian, Tommy Stones, [Reaches into coat pocket, pulls out piece of paper...] and put an idea to paper by signing this contract that officially grants me the right to officiate your little sandbox dispute.

[Loud but mixed reaction from crowd.]

The Informer - WOW! WHAT A BOMBSHELL!!!!

Serial Thrylla - Just remember ladies... You two are playing for a piece of tin I never... [Long pause] ....ever, fucking lost.

Vic Canon - I wonder what the hell The Hustler and C4 are thinking right now!!

Serial Thrylla - Oh yeah.. One more thing..... Homicide is from the heavens... AND.... Death... Comes From....... Above. [Evil grin.]

The Informer - DON'T GO AWAY!! WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK!!!

Y2C - Rachel.. Jericho is nothing but an overrated ASSHOLE who wants nothing but to ruin the lives of everyone he faces! I really don't care about Jericho at the moment.. because he's too predictable.. and I can already tell you what's going to happen.. but I won't.. wouldn't want to ruin the surprise..

Rachel Stevens - Well what about Arthryn? He might be a rookie, but he has lots of skill! A loss to him tonight wouldn't look too good on your behalf!

Y2C - You think I care Rachel?! A loss to me at this point is nothing.. but If I did lose to a guy named Arthryn.. it could be devastating... only because of his name.. but I really could care less..

Rachel Stevens - Over to you, Rob!

Arthryn - I already stated this, DiMarco. Do your homework before you ask me this questions. If he's taking me lightly, that is his problem. He'll notice how Arthryn and all the members of the Arthrynian fanclub will once again be victorious.

Rob DiMarco - Also, your four man team aren't scheduled for any matches at the Pay Per View... Do you feel like you're being held down?

Arthryn - Held down? That's an understatement. Everyone knows I am capable of SO much. But it's alright, you see...One way or the other, expected or unexpectedly, at one point or another, everyone gets executed. From that fat-ass guy in the front row drinking 10 beers/minute, to Rachel Stevens or you, Mr. DiMarco. Arthrynian fanclub, get ready, because you're all witnessing yet another execution to prove myself in the world. Vale.

Rob DiMarco - Well, good luck in your match! Lets send it to ringside!

["Hangman Jury" by Aerosmith blasts through the speakers, as Arthryn steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

Chris Myers - And his opponent... accompanied to the ring by Richie Shanghai, standing 6'4" and weighing in at 234 pounds, from Long Beach, California, "The Millennium Fan" Y2C!

["Underachiever" by Junkie XL blasts through the speakers, as Richie Shanghai and "The Millennium Fan" Y2C step out from behind the curtain and head towards the ring.]

The Informer - And they lock up! Y2C throws Arthryn to the ropes... wait a minute... this crowd has ERUPTED for some reason!

Vic Canon - LOOK! It's Jericho!!

Eddie Sensation - The fans LOVE HIM!

The Informer - Look at Y2C! He's staring at Jericho! WAIT A MINUTE... ARTHRYN ROLLS UP Y2C FOR THE PIN... 1.... 2... NO! Y2C kicks out JUST in time!!

Vic Canon - See what happens when you don't concentrate on your opponent?! I think Y2C is going to lose this match, because his attention is on Jericho, and not Arthryn!

Eddie Sensation - OH!!! What was that Canon?! HAHAH!

The Informer - Y2C just LEVELED Arthryn with a Lariat! And now Y2C is looking at Jericho again!

Vic Canon - Told ya! He's too paranoid!

Eddie Sensation - Well, now he's going back to work on Arthryn!

The Informer - Y2C throws him to the ropes... Arthryn ducks a clothesline... Y2C bounces off the ropes, FLYING FOREARM by Arthryn! He goes for the cover... 1.... 2.... No! Y2C gets his shoulder up...

Vic Canon - And look at Jericho! He's inching closer to the ring!

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, so?!

The Informer - Arthryn sets up Y2C.... REVERSE SUPLEX! He nailed it! And now Arthryn is going to the top rope! Look out, Y2C is getting to his feet!

Vic Canon - Y2C is up!! Arthryn jumps... OH!! MOONSAULT RIGHT ON THE MONEY!!! He goes for the pin... 1.... 2.... No! Y2C gets his shoulder up!

Eddie Sensation - DAMN, Y2C is getting his ass kicked!

The Informer - You got that righ--OH!! LOW BLOW by Y2C! Now the tables have turned! Y2C grabs Arthryn.... IMPLANT DDT! He picks him up again.... BELLY-TO-BACK RELEASE SUPLEX!!!

Vic Canon - And now Y2C is starting to make a comeback!!

Eddie Sensation - Look at Jericho! He's halfway up the stairs!

The Informer - Look in the ring!! Y2C is applying the Walls Of Calcutta!! LOOK! JERICHO IS ON THE APRON!! HE HAS THE REF DISTRACTED!!!

Vic Canon - ARTHRYN IS TAPPING!! BUT THE REF DOESN'T SEE IT!!

Eddie Sensation - LOOK!! HERE COMES MANDI!!!!

The Informer - "THE WHORE OF HARDCORE" IS IN THE RING..... OH!!!! BASEBALL BAT TO THE BACK OF Y2C!!! HE FELL LIKE A SACK OF BRICKS!!!!

Vic Canon - NOW LOOK! JERICHO IS GETTING DOWN OFF THE APRON!!! AND MANDI HAS PULLED ARTHRYN ON TOP OF Y2C!! THE REF COUNTS..... 1....... 2...... 3!!!!!

Eddie Sensation - OH SHIT!!

Chris Myers - And the winner of this match, Arthryn!

The Informer - Y2C isn't going to be too happy when he gets up!!

Vic Canon - That's IF he gets up!! Jericho and Mandi are getting into the ring!!

Eddie Sensation - Jericho is approaching Y2C!! HAHAH!! HE'S POKING HIM WITH THE BASEBALL BAT!! HAHAHHA!!!!

The Informer - OH NO!! JERICHO APPLIES THE WALLS OF JERICHO!! HE'S GOT Y2C IN THE WALLS OF JERICHO!!

Vic Canon - HERE COMES A LOAD OF EWA OFFICIALS!!! BUT MANDI IS CLEARING THEM OUT OF THE RING!!!

Eddie Sensation - HAHAH!! I LOVE IT!!

The Informer - And Jericho FINALLY releases the hold!!

Vic Canon - I think it's safe to say that Jericho got the message across to Y2C!

Eddie Sensation - Damn right!!

The Informer - As Mandi and Jericho leave the ring, we're going to send it backstage to Rachel Stevenes!

Lorenzo Hayes - Well first Rachel think that question over once again. Would there be any other reason why WaR cRyMe and I would be in the Tag Team division if we weren't searching for gold? Of course not! Our eyes are set on the EWA tag titles and quite frankly it shouldn't be to hard for us to get it. For the EWA is lacking terribly in the tag team division. I mean tonight we face two no-name losers who probably have a hard time throwing a punch. I mean how easy can it get! And to be honest Rachel the EWA tag team champions at this moment, in the SEXY MF'S aren't really that good, and trust me when I say this; WaR cRyMe and I will be too strong and just too damn talented for them to handle if we ever get into the ring with them. So Rachel it won't be long before Lorenzo Hayes and WaR cRyMe "The IconZ of PerfectioN" have the tag belts around their wastes. You got it? I hope so, because it is bound to happen!

Rachel Stevens - Well then aren't you at all mad that you guys don't have a match at the Pay Per View??

WaR CrYmE - Am i mad at having no match at the PPV?!?!? Hell no!!! Im pissed because Yum Yum has been kidnapped!!! I was taking a piss and i heard a scuffle in the locker room. I ran out of the bathroom my manhood flopping about and found a ransom note!!! There wasnt a name signed to it, but i know who it was, it was the creaters of The Evil Barbie Klan, the Williams brothers!!! But i have also learned new information from an inside source. The Williams Brotherz have not been acting alone..... Anatomy of Perfection has also been helping them. I left the 30 ketchup packets and box of ham hocks infront of the midgets dressing rom like the note said and hark!!! When i returned to my locker room there was Purple, he ws shakin and scared....they violated him in ways i cannot bring myself to speak. If i was truly a creul man and wanted to do to them what they did to Yum Yum id have to call divine and have him do his "thing" to all 4 men. But i have a better idea for an even greater revenge!!! Williams Brothers, Anatomy of Perfection, i challenge both you teams to a three way dance of The PPV, i will get revenge for Yum Yum.....oh yes i will....

Rachel Stevens - Back to you guys at ringside!

["Killer" by ATB blasts through the speakers, as The Williams Brotherz step out from behind the curtain and head towards the ring.]

Chris Myers - And their opponents... at a total combined weighing of in at 512 pounds, "Mr. Ratings" Lorenzo Hayes & WaR CrYmE, The Iconz Of Perfection!

["Raw" by Staind blasts through the speakers, as The Iconz of Perfection steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

The Informer - LOOK OUT!! THERE'S THE ANATOMY OF PERFECTION!!

Vic Canon - THIS MATCH HASN'T EVEN STARTED, AND THEY'RE ALREADY ALL OVER THE ICONZ OF PERFECTION!!!

Eddie Sensation - AND HERE COME THE WILLIAMS BROTHERZ!! IT'S A 6 MAN BRAWL ON THE OUTSIDE!!!

The Informer - Lorenzo Hayes and WaR CrYmE are alone in the ring with Jarvis Williams! The Anatomy Of Perfection and Sean Williams are brawling it out on the outside!!

Vic Canon - OH SHIT!!! DID YOU JUST SEE THAT IN THE RING?!?!

Eddie Sensation - Ummm, no... WHAT HAPPENED?!

Vic Canon - I DON'T KNOW EITHER, ALL I SAW WAS JARVIS WILLIAMS HIT THE MAT REALLY, REALLY, REALLY HARD!!! THAT WAS FREAKY!! DID YOU HEAR THE THUD?!

Eddie Sensation - I think so.... Is that what it was?!

The Informer - ANYWAY, Jarvis Williams is now out in the middle of the ring! And the other 3 have brawled backstage! The Iconz of Perfection are now following, and chasing them back there!

Vic Canon - Well, our camera can only go a certain distance! We're going to need another camera back there!

Eddie Sensation - Hey look, I think he's twitching!

The Informer - Who?!

Vic Canon - Jarvis Williams!! It looks like it to me!!

Eddie Sensation - DAMN! Whatever they did to him was pretty damn vicious!

The Informer - I think we have a camera back there... can we get a visual please?!! ....THERE!

Vic Canon - And they're STILL brawling it out! Lorenzo Hayes has Ian Casten.... OH!!! POWERBOMB ONTO THE CONCRETE FLOOR!! HE'S NOT GOING ANYWHERE FOR A WHILE!!!

Eddie Sensation - Now we're down to 4 guys!

The Informer - And it looks like EWA Officials are breaking them up!!!

Vic Canon - These 3 teams HATE eachother! Look at what the Iconz of Perfection have done to their opponents!

Eddie Sensation - And they're having a Triple Threat Match at the Pay Per View?! DAMN!! That's gonna be GOOD!!

The Informer - We've gotta take a commercial break! Don't go anywhere!

The Informer - Welcome back to Tuesday Night Heat folks, and before we go any further, I'd like to point out that former EWA Heavyweight Champion DEUCE and his Tag Team partner and best friend Blitzkreig are in attendance here tonight!

Eddie Sensation - Can we get a camera shot?! AH!! THERE THEY ARE!!

Vic Canon - We're in their hometown here tonight, and they wouldn't miss this for the world!

Eddie Sensation - That, or they were given tickets and had nothing better to do!!

The Informer - Oh shut up Eddie!

Rocky Blonde - Honestly, Rachel to me this is going to be pay back. For what he did to me after I was knocked out by that little run Nuno, Howell goes and gives me his finisher 3 times, leaving me unconcious in the ring. Tonight he's going to learn how it feels to be beaten badly, and trust me your going to see The Entrance to Paradise more then once tonight in my match.

Rachel Stevens - This is also a #1 Contender Match for the North American Title, with the winner going on to the Pay Per View to fight Nuno Nitrowalawitz!! How important is it for you to win tonight?? Are you at all concerned about winning that Title, or is it just about revenge tonight??

Rocky Blonde - How important is it for me. Well this is pretty damm important considering how I'm still new around this fed with only 3 matches under my belt and I get a shot at the number 1 contender match for the North American title. Tonight is my night to shine, unless that bastard Nuno try's to do anything stupid again, but if he does, I'm seriously going to hurt the mother fucker. About the revenge part, I can gurand-damm-tee you that tnoight's match is also about revenge against Howell. Now thats all I got to say.

Rachel Stevens - Over to you, Rob!

Thurston Howell - Well one thing is for sure, and that is that I will dismantle Rocky Blonde and make him wish that he never signed a contract with the EWA. But it really doesn't matter to me if I do it inside or outside of the ring. I mean if I get to go with Rocky one on one there is no question that I will beat him like never before and if Nuno wants to join in the fun, then so be it, just two little men in the that the baddest man in the EWA has to take care of. And Nuno if you do get involved I promise you that some furniture will be used and you won't be the man using it this time!

Rob DiMarco - This match is also a #1 Contender Match for the North American Title... Do you think Nuno will get involved??

Thurston Howell - Just for the record, I think Nuno is the worst North American Champion in the history of the EWA and is a disgrace to the federation. But I have an instinct that he will be getting involved because anyway he can avoid facing me he will do so. I mean who would you rather step in the ring with, Rocky Balb...Rocky Blonde or as many people call me "The Psycho" Thurston Howell? The answer too obvious, I mean who wants to step in the ring with me in the first place? But no matter how hard you try Nuno, I will beat Rocky Blonde into a bolivian, and Nuno I will get my shot at you and take the North American Title and show you and the EWA who is a real champion!

Rob DiMarco - Well good luck in your match! Guys?

["Cowboys from Hell" by Pantera blasts through the speakers, as Joe and Rocky Blonde step out from behind the curtain and head towards the ring.]

Chris Myers - And his opponent... standing 6'4" and weighing in at 248 pounds, from Greenwich, Conneticuit, Thurston Howell!

["Break Stuff" by Limp Bizkit blasts through the speakers, as Thurston Howell steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

The Informer - This match is about to get started, and I'm looking forward to seeing these two get it on after what they did to each other last week!

[Suddenly, "Sugar" by System Of A Down blasts through the speakers, and the EWA North American Champion "FreakShow" Nuno Nitrowalawitz steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

Vic Canon - What the hell is he doing here?!

Eddie Sensation - What do you think, you idiot?! He is the EWA North American Champion, and this match will determine the #1 Contender for his title! He wants to watch and see what he's up against!

The Informer - Eddie, for once, you're right!

Eddie Sensation - WOOHOO!!

The Informer - Well, I was expecting Nuno to do commentary, but he's just walking around the ring!

Vic Canon - Maybe he wants a closer look! Howell and Blonde lock up! Howell throws Rocky Blonde to the ropes.... SIDEWALK SLAM!! He goes for the cover... 1... 2.... Wait a minute... Nuno just put Rocky's leg on the bottom rope, and called for the ref to show him!

Eddie Sensation - What the hell?! Is he in cahoots with Rocky Blonde?! He just saved him from losing!

The Informer - Umm, Eddie, I think he would have kicked out! Wait a minute... Nuno is on the apron now! The ref is over there trying to tell him to get down, but Nuno isn't listening!!

Vic Canon - Howell throws Rocky Blonde to the ropes... OH!! ROCKY AND NUNO COLLIDE, AND NUNO WENT FLYING!! HOWELL ROLLS UP ROCKY... 1... 2.... NO! BLONDE GETS THE SHOULDER UP!

Eddie Sensation - PHEW, that was close!

The Informer - Hey, look... Nuno is getting into the ring, and he has his North American Title in hand!! Nuno swings at Blonde, Rocky Blonde ducks... OH!! NUNO NAILS HOWELL WITH THE BELT!!

Vic Canon - WHAM!! AND NOW HE GOT ROCKY BLONDE!! NUNO HAS JUST NAILED BOTH MEN WITH THAT BELT, AND THE CROWD IS GOING NUTS!!! THEY LOVE NUNO!!!

Eddie Sensation - WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO THIS GUY?!?! BEFORE, HE HAD NO TALENT, AND LOST EVERY MATCH!! NOW, HE'S BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYONE!!

The Informer - Nuno is now leaving the ring, and Howell and Blonde are out cold!!

Chris Myers - This match has been ruled a No Contest!

Vic Canon - WHAT?! Who's the #1 Contender? Who's going on to fight Nuno at the Pay Per View?!

Eddie Sensation - Don't look at me... I don't know!

The Informer - Beats me! We're going to have to wait and find out later, when the EWA announces the Pay Per View Card...

Vic Canon - Ok, I guess.... Now let's send it backstage to Rob DiMarco who's with Dino Delsante and Zed! Rob?

Dino Delsante - Whoa, whoa, whoa, Rob. This match is two on two. Last time I checked the limousine, Brett Bomb wasn't in it. But, we've been testing him, and tonight, we have him in the ultimate test. He will actually go up against two of the 3D's finest. If he passes "the test," we might see a new member in the 3D as early as next Tuesday Night. But, he must pass "the test" first.

Rob DiMarco - And once again, Tom Stone will be at ringside! Zed, this MUST get your attention! Are you expecting Stone to attempt to do something, AGAIN?

Zed - If he does, he can be sure to expect what happened to him last time. I'll grab him by his scrawny little neck, lift him in the air, and I'll leave his ass UNFORGIVEN!!

Rob DiMarco - Over to you guys at ringside!

Shawn Walker - First off Rachel just let me ask you one thing, in the famous words of one Joey Tribioni, How You Doin??? Now on to my match tonight hot cakes, you see I really couldn't give a you know what about Brett Bomb being and acting like the whining, coniving son of a bitch he is, you know I really and honestly wouldn't be surprised if Bombed was planning a little soemthing with the 3D right this very instant. Brett it's your choice, either life, by making the right decision and holding up your ass end of the tag team tonight, or the hospital, by making the wrong decision and fucking with Shawn Walker, which will get you no where but on top of a bed pan!

Rachel Stevens - Tom, we know you're the person who creates these matches and these cards.... Why the HELL would you do this to Shawn Walker?!

Tom Stone - That's simple Rachel... I told you all from Day ONE that Walker could beat ANYONE, ANYWHERE. Tonight is going to be PROOF that he's better then you all think he is!

Rachel Stevens - Over to you, Rob!

Vic Canon - Informer, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that the x-factor in this match is Tom Stone. He will, more or less, decide the outcome of this match by his presence alone.

Eddie Sensation - You're nuts! You've got Dino Delsante, "The Cornerstone," the new leader of the 3D! You've got Zed, one of the greatest wrestlers ever in the EWA! And then you've got the "Top Prospect," Brett Bomb! This match is essentially the 3D and their top draft pick versus Tom Stone and his bodyguard!

The Informer - It's hard to argue with that logic, but according to what Dino said just moments ago, it seems like it will really be 2 on 1 on 2. If you ask me, the only man who should watch his back is Brett Bomb.

Chris Myers - This next match is scheduled for one fall, and is a Tag Team Match! Introducing first... standing 6'4�" and weighing in at 275 pounds, from Toronto, Ontario, Canada, Brett Bomb!

["Wake Up" by Rage Against The Machine blasts through the speakers, as Brett Bomb steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

Vic Canon - And here is the Rookie of the Moment. Brett Bomb has made a splash here in the EWA in a short period of time.

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, but he has yet to impress the 3D. He wants in the 3D bad, if you ask me, and I wonder if he'll pass "the test."

The Informer - I just wonder�

Chris Myers - And his Tag-Team partner... standing 6'5" and weighing in at 256 pounds, from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, Shawn Walker!

["Enter Sandman" by Metallica blasts through the speakers, as Shawn Walker steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

The Informer - As I was going to say, I just wonder what "the test" is, but here comes Shawn Walker, the boss' bodyguard.

Eddie Sensation - This guy gets a push just because he's Stone's bodyguard. That's ridiculous!

Vic Canon - That's preposterous! Shawn Walker is a talented athlete and a great wrestler. Tom Stone chose him to be his bodyguard because Walker is a great asset to the company. This team of Bomb and Walker can be considered the best of the new school, pardon the pun.

Chris Myers - And their opponents... accompanied to the ring by Tracey Lane, at a total combined weight of 505 pounds, "The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante and Zed!

["Rock Is Dead" by Marilyn Manson blasts through the speakers, as Tracey Lane, "The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante and Zed step out from behind the curtain and head towards the ring.]

Eddie Sensation - Well, if that's the best the new school has to offer, then look at what the old school has to offer!

The Informer - One half of the World Tag Team champions, "The Cornerstone," and the master of "the Unforgiven," Zed�they are two of the baddest in the sport.

Vic Canon - Looks like Tracey is discussing strategy with her men. Walker and Bomb are as well, but they don't look to be getting along as well.

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, that's because Brett Bomb is trying to see who is starting out on the 3D side and Shawn Walker wants his full attention.

The Informer - Hold on! Look who's headed down to ringside! It's Tom Stone!

Eddie Sensation - What does he want?

Vic Canon - Looks like Tom is forcing Brett Bomb to start the match! I guess Stone wants to see where his allegiance lies.

Eddie Sensation - And looks like Zed is starting out for his team. Collar and elbow tie up and Bomb brings it to an arm bar. Zed reverses it and Brett is trying to break out of it. He's walking up the turnbuckles�what is "The Devastator" doing?

The Informer - He's standing on the top turnbuckle and he drops to the top rope and FLIPS OVER! Whoa! What an athletic move!

Eddie Sensation - The hold is broken and look at "The Cornerstone." He's applauding that move.

Vic Canon - But Tom Stone isn't. He's giving the rookie an earful. Zed tags out and Dino Delsante comes in. Collar and elbow tie up. Dino has Brett in a headlock. Brett shoots him off into the ropes. Brett leapfrogs Dino, NO! DINO CATCHES HIM IN THE AIR! HE SLAMS BRETT INTO THE MAT! Whew!

Eddie Sensation - But look! Dino is helping Brett Bomb up! He helps Brett up to his feet! What's he whispering to him?

The Informer - I don't know, but Brett Bomb is walking over to make the tag. And Stone is telling Walker not to tag in! Walker is refusing the tag!

Vic Canon - Tom Stone is having none of this! Brett is still in the ring. Delsante has a word with Brett Bomb and here they go again. Collar and elbow tie up, and Brett Bomb pulls "The Cornerstone" into a headlock. Dino lifts him up, and Brett flips over! Dropkick to the back of the head sends "The Cornerstone" into the ropes. Delsante comes back and HE'S MET BY A CLOTHESLINE! Brett tags in Walker! Walker picks Dino up. Snap suplex by Shawn Walker. Walker goes for the pin. 1�2�kickout by Dino!

The Informer - Walker wasting no time! He picks Dino up and sends him into the turnbuckle. Walker charges and Dino lifts a foot! Walker staggers back, and Dino runs and bulldogs him.

Eddie Sensation - Dino tags in Zed. Zed picks up walker and asks Dino for a boot and rams Shawn Walker's face into it. Brett Bomb tries to come in, and Lance King is pushing him back! Tom Stone is going nuts!

Vic Canon - Yeah, because that only helps Zed and Dino double-team Shawn Walker! Zed is choking the life out of him.

Eddie Sensation - Maybe this is "the test."

The Informer - Could be. The ref comes over and breaks the choke. Zed lifts Walker up. Irish whip, reversed by Shawn Walker and GOOD GOD! TOM STONE PULLED THE TOP ROPE DOWN! ZED CRASHES TO THE FLOOR!

Vic Canon - AND TOM STONE IS KICKING THE CRAP OUT OF ZED! HERE COMES WALKER! THE REFEREE IS CALLING FOR THE BELL BUT TOM STONE JUST STEPPED ON TO THE APRON! HE'S TELLING LANCE KING NOT TO RING THE BELL!

Eddie Sensation - I think he just threatened to fire him if he calls for the bell! Dino and Brett enter the ring. Dino is demanding an explanation.

The Informer - HEY, HEY, HEY! HERE COMES HACK! HERE COMES HACKER! AND HE'S GOING RIGHT AFTER "THE CORNERSTONE!!" HE JUST SPEARED DELSANTE! HE'S TAKING IT TO DINO!

Eddie Sensation - BUT BRETT BOMB IS GOING AFTER HACK! HE'S HELPING DINO OUT!

Vic Canon - And now Dino is going after Tom Stone and Shawn Walker! Stone and his bodyguard take off! They're getting out of here!

The Informer - In the ring, Hack has just turned the tide on Brett Bomb and HE HACKKNIFES BRETT BOMB!! And look at the 3D! Delsante and Tracey are helping Zed to the back while their top prospect is taking a beating!! We have to take a commercial break! We'll be right back!

Jason Chandler - How do I feel about it? How do I feel about it, do you realize the pain I've gone through in the last few months, looking at the EWA crumble and then the happieness that has shot through my veins as I see it rebuilding into the federation that I couldn't even get into now 1 year ago. And now I don't even have a match at the PPV named after ME! Well it doesn't matter you see after tonight, after I become the EXTREME Champion a title that actually means something to EWA, unlike the NA Title which I basically left this federation instead of getting the belt. Tonight after I beat whoever it is that has the belt I'm going to go home and celebrate with my newborn daughter Jaince and my wife Michelle, because their Papi just brought home a new belt for the collection and a brand new paycheck for the bank.

Rachel Stevens - Well, you might right, because Jericho has a lot of enemies these days! One being Y2C, who has an Extreme Title Orange On A Poll Cage Match with this Sunday! Do you want to win this match by yourself, or are you open to any help?

Jason Chandler - Help... Help I don't need any help, but coming from the streets like I did you gotta realize that you take what you get and you reap what you soe, I dont care if it's Y2C, Y2J, or Santa Clause himself if he wants to help me let, him, but he better stay outta my way I'm trying to be the best HEEL in the business and what better way then to cheat to win.

Rachel Stevens - Lets send it over to Rob DiMarco! Rob?

Chris Jericho - BY THE POWERS OF GEY SKULL....I AM JERICHO!!!

Rob DiMarco - Right, also Chris, we saw what you did to Y2C earlier tonight... Do you think he's going to come back for some revenge of his own??

Chris Jericho - He has felt the mighty wrath of Xcalibur and Battlecat. He will NEVER E-E-EVER cross "The Orange Slayer" AGAIN!!!

Rob DiMarco - Let's send it to ringside!

["We Ready" by Master P & The No Limit Family blasts through the speakers, as Jason Chandler steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

Chris Myers - And his opponent... accompanied to the ring by Mandi, standing 5'11" and weighing in at 230 pounds, from Calgary, Alberta, Canada, the EWA Extreme Champion, "The Franchise" Chris Jericho!

["Walls Of Jericho" blasts through the speakers, as Mandi and the EWA Extreme Champion "The Franchise" Chris Jericho step out from behind the curtain and head towards the ring.]

The Informer - And Jericho is wasting no time!! He kicks Jason Chandler in the gut, and CLOTHESLINES him to the mat!!

Vic Canon - WOW, Jericho looks extremly motivated!

Eddie Sensation - LOOK OUT!!

The Informer - OH!! JERICHO JUST PLANTED JASON CHANDLER WITH A RUNNING POWERBOMB!! And now Jericho is rolling to the outside!

Vic Canon - Oh shit! He's got a chair!!!

Eddie Sensation - LOOK OUT JASON!

The Informer - Jericho is waiting for Jason Chandler to get to his feet.... And he's up!!!

Vic Canon - WHAM!! AND JASON CHANDLER GOES DOWN!! Jericho rolls Jason Chandler over for the cover.....

Eddie Sensation - Wait a minute... LOOK! THERE'S AN ORANGE ON THE MAT!! AND IT'S EXACTLY WHERE JASON CHANDLER'S EAR WAS!!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS?!?!

The Informer - No, what?

Eddie Sensation - THEY GOT HIM, TOO!!!

The Informer - Look at Jericho! He's stunned! And now he's stomping the orange!! Oh DAMMIT, get the clean up crew out here! There's orange juice all over the mat!!

Vic Canon - LOOK OUT, Jason Chandler is up! He's charging at Jericho, but Jericho saw him coming! Kick to the gut by Jericho.......

Eddie Sensation - OH!!! OH!!!

The Informer - DOUBLE POWERBOMB!!! Jericho gets up, and runs to the ropes.... OH!! ASAI MOONSAULT!!!

Vic Canon - AND NOW JERICHO IS CALLING FOR IT!! HE'S CALLING FOR THE WALLS OF JERICHO!!!

Eddie Sensation - .....HERE HE GOES!!!

The Informer - YES!! HE'S GOT IT LOCKED ON!! JASON CHANDLER IS TAPPING!!! JERICHO HAS WON!!

Chris Myers - The winner of this match, and STILL EWA Extreme Champion, "The Franchise" Chris Jericho!

Vic Canon - LOOK OUT!! HERE COMES Y2C!! HE'S GOT A STEEL CHAIR!!!

Eddie Sensation - WHAM!!! OH MAN!! JERICHO IS OUT!!

The Informer - NOW WHAT'S HE DOING?!?!

Vic Canon - Y2C IS LOCKING ON THE WALLS OF CALCUTTA!!! JERICHO IS OUT!! HE CAN'T DEFEND HIMSELF!!! Y2C COULD SERIOUSLY INJURE HIM!!! GET SOME HELP OUT HERE!!

Eddie Sensation - HOLY SHIT!! LOOK AT Y2C PULL BACK!! HE'S GONE CRAZY!!!

The Informer - FOLKS, WE HAVE TO TAKE A COMMERCIAL BREAK!! WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK!!!

The Informer - We're back here on Tuesday Night Heat, and here's what happened during the commmercial break! Hit the replay!

Vic Canon - As you can see, Officials finally seperated Y2C from Jericho, and Jericho eventually got back to his feet. Now look at his face when he realizes what happens!! .....THERE!! He just SNAPPED and took it out on Jason Chandler, who was still in the ring!

The Informer - Right... Jericho then locked on the Walls of Jericho on Jason Chandler for the SECOND time, and refused to let go!

Vic Canon - Seconds before we came back, officials seperated Jericho from Jason. Jason Chandler is still out cold in the middle of the ring...

The Informer - Hey Vic, "X-Rated" is still in the ring!

Vic Canon - Yeah, uh, if I was him, I MIGHT think about leaving. God only knows how Chandler feels about HIM.

[Chandler smirks and extends his arm to help up his fellow wrestler, pats him on the back, then viciously kicks him in the gut and deilvers a float-over fallaway Big Timer...]

Vic Canon - ....told ya.

The Informer - Ouch.

[Chandler turns his mic on and proceeds to talk trash to his fallen peer.]

Chandler - Hey, hey "X-Rated". How bout goin to get some "X-RAYS" bitch?! Get up. Get up now. GET THE FUCK UP SLUT.

["X-Rated" does not move, so Chandler picks him up himslef and sets him atop a turnbuckle. The groggy Jason barely knows where he is.]

Chandler - Hey, yeah, lemme ask you something, Jason Chandler. Is that your real name?

Jason Chandler - Uhhhhhhh, yes. Yes it is.

Chandler - Oh, well shit guy! This just isn't gonna work out now isn't it? What happens if some poor kid sees "Chandler" on an EWA marquee and buys a ticket, only to see some 2-bit blowhole calling himself "X-Rated" in the ring? How would that kid feel, CHANDLER?

Jason Chandler - (Still Groggy) Uhhhhh, not too good?

Chandler - BINGO. Now, question is, how do we remedy this problem?

[Jason Chandler shrugs his shoulders, still half-unconscious. Chandler (this is confusing!) smiles and brings his mic back to his face...]

Chandler - Surely theres SOMETHING we can do. Ah! Hey "X-Rated", you a history buff?

Jason Chandler - ...I dunno. Maybe?

Chandler - Maybe. That works. What about World War II, you like World War II?

The Informer - Uh oh. Hey Vic, is he going where I think he's going?

Vic Canon - Yep! This is gonna kick ass!

Jason Chandler - You mean, like, D-Day and stuff?

Chandler - WOW! Great. Well, as you know the United States goverment, in its quest to crush those who simply chose a different form of government, dropped a nuclear bomb on the defenseless Island of Japan. Tell me, Jason, where did they drop that fucking bomb?

Jason Chandler - Hir....Hir something. Hir....

Chandler - Hiroshima..........bitch.

[Chandler ascends the turnbuckle and goes behind Jason. He applies -HIROSHIMA-, the move quickly becoming the most deadly in the EWA, ever. But this time he does something different. He doesn't hold in for a submission. In a move almost like a tornada ddt, he swings while still applying the submission hold and drops Jason "X-Rated" Chandler on his head...]

Vic Canon - GOOD GOD. What the hell do you call THAT?!?

The Informer - I have no idea. That was like nothing I've never seen before. We need some paramedics now.

Vic Canon - No shit, eh?

[Chandler releases the hold on throws JC over the top rope and into a group of EMTs that had rushed to the ring to check on the man. Chandler gets his mic back...]

Chandler - Steal THAT, bitch. Sure, I don't mind if you use my name, ON YOUR FUCKING TOE TAG. Now, EMTs, get him the hell outta here. I got a promo to cut.

Vic Canon - NOW he cuts the promo? He's been out here 15 minutes already!

The Informer - Well, you know what he says, he likes to ramble.

Vic Canon - "Ramble" my ass. More like read a novel.

Chandler - HEY! YOU TWO! SHUT THE FUCK UP. Get the camera on my face.....

[The announcers shut up and the camera focuses on Chandler's face.]

Chandler - That's better. Now, lots of shit has gone down, and everyone wants to know my take. All these "legends" return, Nick Diamante ducks me, and I get the opening fucking match on heat. Well, tonight, your question, are answered.

Chandler - First off, no one, and I mean NO ONE, EVER, makes Clayton fucking Chandler jerk the curtain. Stone, if you ever give me the opening match again I'll kill you when I kill Diamante. The only reason I agreed to it last week is because I, at that time, had some semblence of respect for the Wildman. But any man who lets Canadian Clogged-Arteries hang his ass on National Television loses my respect. So, Wildman, stay in the hospital. You suck.

Chandler - Diamante. Nick Diamante. Where ya at boy? I don't see ya. You hit and run, you stick and move. Who the fuck do you think you are, the obese Mahhamed Ali? You're Canadian! You can't box. Shit, in fact, you can't wrestle. Because if you were a real man, a REAL WRESTLER, you would be out here RIGHT NOW and dance with, one on one. But, of course, that won't happen. Why? Because Nick's chickenshit and Stone wants it on pay-per-view. I say, fuck pay-per-view, I don't need the money. Anytime, anyplace, and under any circumstances. One day, I'm KILLING you Nick. I am going to make you DIE. Understand that. Understand the fact that this is beyond wrestling and its stupid-ass little "angles", this is real hatred. You made me leave the greatest job of my life in the greatest place of my life...(swings his arms to the crowd) for this. FOR THIS! Do you think I *like* being here? Hell no. I hate it. And I hate you. I hate your fucking guts Nick.

Chandler - And now we get to the fun part. We get to "the legends". First off, and let me make this very clear, I do not consider myself a "legend". That's obsurd. I'm 18 years old, and while I have accomplished a hell of a lot in this industry, I have my entire life to go. To call Clayton Chandler a "legend" is outragous. But thanks anyway. So now EVERYONE jumps on the bandwagon, EVERYONE comes back. EVERYONE tries to steal MY thunder. Why? I don't even WANT to be here, yet these people volunteer? Brink, you and me, for the most part, get along. You were with me when I quit this company last year. I don't mind you being here. Thorn? Eh. Never really crossed paths. An acqaintence. You're no worry to me. But....but one man...I got a big problem with.

Chandler - Serial Thrylla. Man, we've been here before. We've done this shit before. Yes, we pretty much broke in together. Yes, your my best friend in this industry. And yes, we've been through more shit than any two men can go through in wrestling. But, why do you continue to do this to me? Lets take a look back, if we will, to the first EWA: Full Revolution. In the main event, after a month vacation, I returned. But, later in the match, also after a month vaction, guess who ther fuck shows up. You. You tried to one-up me, and on that occasion, it worked. But this time, oooo man, this time things are different. I return on pay-per-view, in front of the world, and cut a fuckin great promo. You return a week later, on heat, and your on TV for 5 minutes. You're not active, and you're not involved. This time *I* won, and you're just going to have to deal with that. This time *I'm* carrying the fucking ball. Live with it. You may be my best friend, but dammit, I ain't about to let what happened last year, happen again. EAT IT, basically.

Chandler - And...oh yeah. Today I we....

[Suddenly, some loud voices are heard over the arena's PA system. Chandler turns his attention to the EWA video wall, and sees none other than The Big Johnsons and Enzo from the 3D.]

Elroy Johnson - EH! EH! Enuff uh ya sheeit, guy!

The Informer - It's The Big Johnsons! And Enzo!

Vic Canon - What do they want??

Elroy Johnson - Chandlah, G. wassup wiff you, man? You use ta be a G, jus like me! Den you done gone all pussy. wassup wiff dat!?

Eddie Sensation - HA! What a trip!

Chandler - What the fuck? Hey listen brownie boy, how bout you go get your watermelon and malt liqour, go down to the Chandler family plantation in Shreveport, you know, the one your daddy raped your momma at, and pick me some cotten so I can make a new T-Shirt, BITCH.

The Informer - WHOA! Good Lord.

Vic Canon - This is too much!

Leroy Johnson - HEY! YOU LISTEN HERE, BIATCH! We don't like ya crap, brother! You done overstayed your welcome here in the EWA! And we're here to fix it, ya heard?!

Chandler - (mocking Leroy) A'ight den wodey, hows ya plan un gehtin' dat shiznit dun PEACHY?

Elroy Johnson - Maaan, dats simpo! Dis here Sunday. we'z gonna get rid of ya, jus like dat! All of us wanna fight ya, G! One at uh time. bruvah, you ain't gots not chance!

The Informer - THEY'RE CHALLENGING CHANDLER TO A MATCH AT NC-17 "PURE VIOLENCE" 2000???

Eddie Sensation - HA! Looks like it!

Leroy Johnson - Yeah, brother. All three of us. in a gauntlet match against your sorry ass!

Vic Canon - MY GOD! A GAUNTLET MATCH?? Meaning Chandler has to fight these guys all in a row??

Chandler - HA! (laughing) O...O..HA...Okay. AHAHAHAHAHA. My god! You got a deal. Yeah man, you're on. Idiot.

The Informer - THE MATCH IS ON!! THIS SUNDAY, IT'S 3 MATCHES FOR CHANDLER!!! HIS FIRST STEP TOWARDS GETTING NICK DIAMANTE IN THE RING!!! THIS'LL BE HUGE!!

Vic Canon - ...Yup.

Thorn - Well, actually Rob, it would be a good thing if he had more talent then I think he does, cause I think he is a no-talent, never will be, piece of garbage that doesn't belong in the EWA, let alone wrestling in general, but you know what? In my mind, yeah I am going "HA!! OX?!" Ya know why? Cause I really don't care if you think he has alot of talent, because your opinion means shit to me, your probably one of those idiots that thinks I'm just hype and that I'm only here cause I kiss Tom Stone's ass. Well if your one of those people, and to all the others out there that believe in that, F-CK YOU!! I do my best so f-ck the rest of you! I don't see you here! I don't see you in the ring! I don't see you doing half the stuff I do! So for all of you who think I'm hype, come step into my boots for a day, and then you'll see what's hype... and what isn't... and I am definately NOT hype. So Rob, would you like to tell me straight to my face whether you think I'm hype or not??

Rob DiMarco - ...Uhhh this Sunday you have a match scheduled with The Brink! Any comments?

Thorn - Don't change the subject you piece of garbage, it's ok though, cause like I said earlier, it doesn't really matter what you think, and the fact that you didn't tell me whether you think I am or not just proves how much of a coward you are... and as for the Brink, I made a fool out of him, and has he shown his ugly face yet?! Not once, so when you think of who does it for the people and who does it because they want money... think of The Brink, because he just took the plunge into his grave when he messed with me. Hopefully he will show up tonight so I can get payback on him for last week, because I don't forget things, and I hope to make sure that he never forgets it either! So Brink tonight, you watch my match against OX, and you watch what happens when you don't handle with care... I'm sure you know by now... you get cut... by the Crown of Thorns!!!

Rob DiMarco - Let's send it to ringside!

["Dope Show" by Marilyn Manson blasts through the speakers, as OX steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

Chris Myers - And his opponent... standing 6'1" and weighing in at 201 pounds, from Sacramento, California, Thorn!

["From This Day" by Machine Head blasts through the speakers, as Thorn steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

The Informer - I'm looking forward to this one, guys! We finally get to see Thorn in the ring, AS THORN and not Aaron Schurr!

Vic Canon - I'm pretty anxious myself!

Eddie Sensation - Look out!

The Informer - OX charges at Thorn! Thorn ducks a clothesline, bounces off the ropes, and NAILS OX with a Spinning Heel Kick! Thorn quickly gets up, and drags OX to his feet...

Vic Canon - OH! CRADLE SUPLEX! Thorn gets up again, and climbs to the top rope! He's waiting for OX to get to his feet!

Eddie Sensation - OX is on one knee..... he's almost up..... aaaaand....

The Informer - MISSLE DROPKICK! Thorn goes for the cover.... No, scratch that... He picks up OX! It looks like he's setting him up for an atomic drop!

Vic Canon - No! Thorn is putting OX on the top rope!

Eddie Sensation - Oh shit!

The Informer - Thorn is now climbing the ropes... He's standing on the top rope with OX, who is sitting!

Vic Canon - LOOK OUT!! OH!!! CORKSCREW HURRACONRANNA!!!

Eddie Sensation - That was great!

The Informer - Now Thorn is setting up OX on the bottom rope! Uh oh.... I think he's setting him up for--

Vic Canon - THE CROWN OF THORNS?!?!

Eddie Sensation - Easy there Vic, no need to get excited!!

The Informer - Thorn is climbing to the top rope again.... He balances himself out... aaaaaand.....

Vic Canon - YES!! HE NAILED IT!! CROWN OF THORNS!! CROWN OF THORNS!!

Eddie Sensation - LOOK! HERE COMES THE BRINK!!!

The Informer - Thorn goes for the cover... 1..... 2..... 3!!! LOOK OUT!! THE BRINK IS IN THE RING!!!

Vic Canon - THE BRINK WITH A KICK TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD OF THORN!!!

Eddie Sensation - HAHAHA!!! THE BRINK IS STOMPING ON THORN!!

The Informer - The Brink has Thorn on his feet... UH OH!! THE BRINK IS SETTING HIM UP IN THE CORNER!! HE'S SETTING HIM UP FOR THE DOWNWARD PLUNGE!!!!

Vic Canon - The Brink quickly runs to the opposite corner......

Eddie Sensation - Hey look! I think Thorn is getting out!

The Informer - THE BRINK RUNS IN.....

Vic Canon - OH SHIT!!

Eddie Sensation - DAMN!! THAT MUST HAVE HURT!!!

The Informer - THORN DUCKED THE KICK, AND THE BRINK'S LEG GOT JAMMED AS HE KICKED THE TURNBUCKLE!! NOW THORN IS WORKING ON THE LEG OF THE BRINK!!

Vic Canon - HERE COME A LOAD OF EWA OFFICIALS!! BUT THORN ISN'T STOPPING!!

Eddie Sensation - LOOK AT HIS EYES!! HE LOOKS EVIL!!! I LOVE IT!!

The Informer - FINALLY, the referee's have pulled Thorn off of The Brink! Folks, we've gotta take a commercial break! Don't go away!!

Hacker - I think that when I liberate the International title. It will attract the eyes of people like Dano DelSaltyballs whom held the title and disgraced it by not being International enough. Dano DelSaltyBalls can only take me down by attacking me from behind and Danno's friend, Brett Bore can only clain he beat the next International champion but it isn't true. Fallen Angel, your time is up, It's all over. Expect the Unexpected because I am leaving this damn town with my International title.

Rachel Stevens - Well, good luck! Over to you, Rob!

Fallen Angel - It doesn't really bother me.

Rob DiMarco - You sure? It doesn't bother you that for no apparent reason you're going to have to put your title on the line for someone like... Hacker?

Fallen Angel - Hacker's a good wrestler. Good luck to him.

Rob DiMarco - And now you're wishing your opponent good luck? I thought you hated Hacker. I'm pretty sure that you've told the world, on numerous occasions, that you hate the hack Daddy.

Fallen Angel - Just because I hate him doesn't mean I have to be unpolite to him. Hacker is definately a good wrestler, and I do wish the son-of-a-bitch good luck.

Rob DiMarco - Something's not right here.

Fallen Angel - YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT SOMETHING'S NOT RIGHT HERE!!! Ever since the pay-per-view... No, before the pay-per-view, Hacker's been right there, on the edge of my career, threatening to cut it loose! Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not afraid of Hacker, but there's something seriously funny going on here. I have challenged Hacker to numerous occasions, as a means to settle differences and pay him back for causing me to lose all chance I had of gaining the heavyweight title. He always seems to be hanging around, making challenges back at me. I challenge him to a normal match, and he declines, telling everyone that I'm not up to wrestling him, and that I'm not as good as him. Then he goes and challenges me for the title, and basically says that he wants to kill me as much as I do him. Finally, I give the son-of-a-bitch a title shot. And he's happy all of a sudden. He thinks he's going to take my title, Rob. He actually thinks that he's going to defeat me! WELL, HACK... YOU WALK YOUR LITTLE ASS DOWN THE TO THE RING, AND YOU TAKE A LOOK AT THE HATRED I HAVE FOR YOUR SCALY ASS!!! YOU'RE A NOTHING!!! YOU'RE A FUCKING NOBODY!!! YET, YOU'RE SO DAMN SURE THAT YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME!!! NAH-AH!!! NO WAY!!! WRONG ANSWER!!! Because tonight Hack, the closest you're going to get to my international title belt, is when I wrap it around your neck and snap your fucking spine with it. You dig... Homie?

Rob DiMarco - You sound very sure of yourself. How you gonna back all that up?

Fallen Angel - Fuck you, DiMarco!

Rob DiMarco - Well, I hope your anger doesn't screw you up tonight... Good luck in your match! Guys?

Vic Canon - If you remember, it was just a few weeks ago when Hacker returned to the EWA with the 3D's permission, so to speak. He was granted a shot at Fallen Ange;, and he cheated his way to victory!

Eddie Sensation - See, what you guys don't understand is that it ain't cheating unless you get caught! Sure, his feet accidentally caught the ropes and gave him a bit of leverage, but who cares? He won!

The Informer - Fans, please excuse our fellow broadcast partner� for he has no morals or sportsmanship qualities!

Vic Canon - Yeah, and Eddie, I'm pretty sure tonight, with the gold on the line, we won't see much cheating at all! The referees are ready tonight!

Eddie Sensation - HA! Whatever� we're gonna see a new International Champ, and his name if The Big Hack Daddy!

The Informer - Let's get this one started!

Chris Myers - This next match is scheduled for one fall, and is for the EWA International Championship! Introducing first... standing 7' and weighing in at 331 pounds, from Detroit, Michigan, Hacker!

["Counterfeit" by Limp Bizkit blasts through the speakers, as Hacker steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

Vic Canon - I've got to admit� Hacker looks in great shape, and he's been hot in the EWA since he returned!

Eddie Sensation - I think he's gonna shut a lot of critics up tonight when he wins EWA gold!

The Informer - Well, he is a former EWA North American Champion� but tonight, he's looking for a larger chunk of the golden pie� the EWA International Title!

Chris Myers - And his opponent... accompanied to the ring by Cerberus, standing 6' and weighing in at 231 pounds, from Chicago, Illinois, the EWA International Champion, Fallen Angel!

["Spiders" by System Of A Down blasts through the speakers, as Cerberus and the EWA International Champion, Fallen Angel step out from behind the curtain and head towards the ring.]

Vic Canon - Fallen Angel never ceases to amaze me! He's in great condition, and he's always ready! He doesn't look too happy here tonight� and that's got to be bad news for Hacker!

Eddie Sensation - Hey, and he's in a rush to start this one off! He's running�

The Informer - FALLEN ANGEL HITS THE RING� RUNS AT HACKER, OH� HE DUCKS A HUGE CLOTHESLINE ATTEMPT BY HACKER AND WHAM!! DDT!! MY GOD!! THIS ONCE COULD BE ALL OVER ALREADY!!

Vic Canon - HEY HOLD UP� there's no ref in the ring! Why is there on referee down here?

Eddie Sensation - That's strange� I guess the ref still hasn't come out! See, that's what happens when these hot heads like Fallen Angel jump the gun!

The Informer - Fallen Angel notices that there's no ref, and he's complaining to Chris Myers on the outside�

Vic Canon - I'm sure an official will be here momentarily. For now, he better capitalize!

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, turn around� ya bonehead!

The Informer - Hey, I'd be careful Sensation� Angel doesn't look to pleased right now!

Vic Canon - But he continues the offence nonetheless! Stiff right hands to the midsection of Hacker! WHAM! WHAM! Fallen Angel is in total control here!

Eddie Sensation - Angel tosses Hacker to the ropes� DAMN! WHAT A CLOTHESLINE! Hacker, dude� the match has started! TIME FOR YOU TO FIGHT!

The Informer - FALLEN ANGEL IS A MAN POSSESSED! RIGHT HANDS� WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! HE'S TAKING OUT HIS FRUSTRATIONS RIGHT ON BIG DADDY HACK!!

Vic Canon - FALLEN ANGEL IS POINTING UPSTAIRS! AT THIS PACE, THIS MATCH ISN'T GOING TO LAST LONG!

Eddie Sensation - FALLEN ANGEL IS ABOUT TO CLIMB TO THE TOP HERE! Is he gonna try to finish this one off with a high risk move?

The Informer - HEY! HEY� LOOK! NO! IT'S� WHAT THE HELL� "THE DIAMOND STUD" NICK DIAMANTE IS RUNNING DOWN TO RINGSIDE� AND HE'S WEARING A REFEREES SHIRT!

Vic Canon - WHY??? WHY?? THIS ISN'T FAIR!! HE CAN'T BE THE OFFICIAL!!

Eddie Sensation - OH YES HE CAN! IT'S IN HIS CONTRACT!

The Informer - FALLEN ANGEL IS ON THE TOP ROPE� HE HASN'T SEEN DIAMANTE! "THE STUD" JUMPS UP ONTO THE APRON� NO!! NO!! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT??

Eddie Sensation - IT WAS AN ACCIDENT! HE WAS TRYING TO GET INTO THE RING!

Vic Canon - ACCIDENT MY ASS! DIAMANTE SHOOK THOSE ROPES ON PURPOSE! AND FALLEN ANGEL JUST STRADDLED THE CORNER POST! No! He's fallen in the ring!

Eddie Sensation - HA! JUST LIKE AN ANGEL FROM THE HEAVENS� FA SURE AS HELL FELL QUITE A WAYS!

The Informer - NO! WHAT'S THIS� YOU CAN'T TELL ME! HACKER IS CAPITALIZING� HE'S GOT FALLEN ANGEL BACK ON HIS FEET AND BENT OVER!

Vic Canon - THIS IS WRONG, DAMNIT! WRONG!

Eddie Sensation - HAHAHAHA!!! BUT I LOVE IT!!! HACKKNIFE POWERBOMB!!! YEAH!! PUT THAT IN YOUR PIPE AND SMOKE IT GUYS!! THIS ONE IS OVER!!

The Informer - NO!! NO!! I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT!!

Vic Canon - HACKER GOES FOR THE COUNT� 1� 2� 3!! MY GOD, NO!! HACKER HAS BECOME THE INTERNATIONAL CHAMPION, ALL THANKS TO "THE DIAMOND STUD"!

Eddie Sensation - WHOO HOOO!!! WHAT A MOMENT!! I TOLD YOU WE'D HAVE A NEW CHAMPION!!

Chris Myers - The winner of this match and new EWA International Champion� Hacker!

The Informer - ...My God, what have we just seen here?!

Vic Canon - A travesty! That's what we've seen! A travesty of justice! Once again, Nick Diamante weaves his way into someone's business and ends up causing havoc! What the hell does he have against Fallen Angel anyway??

Eddie Sensation - Are you kidding me? Fallen Angel has always been jealous of "The Diamond Stud"� as many are! Angel goes around spouting his mouth off as to how Diamante is too scared to fight him and all this crap!

The Informer - Oh please! You know that's not true at all! Fallen Angel is a classy competitor, and up until now, I understood he had somewhat of a respect for Diamante!

Vic Canon - I don't know about that, but I'm sure any respect that could have been there is now fully gone!

Eddie Sensation - Ah, who cares! The guy wasn't deserving of that title anyway! Right now, in the ring you see Big Daddy Hack being congratulated by "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante! Hack is your new EWA International Champion!

The Informer - Yeah, and Fallen Angel is walking to the back� being supported by two officials. When is there finally going to be justice in the EWA? It seems that Diamante always finds a way to get what he wants!

Vic Canon - It's not going to end until someone finally shuts him up!

Eddie Sensation - Hey now, that's not nice! What has Diamante ever done to you?

Vic Canon - Oh� don't even go there�

The Informer - Gentlemen, look! At the top of the ramp! Fallen Angel has just shoved the two referees aside that were attempting to help him!

Vic Canon - That's a gutsy man!

Eddie Sensation - He's an idiot! What's he pointing at?

The Informer - He's obviously pointing at ringside where Hacker and Diamante are standing. Somebody get him a mic!

Vic Canon - That's exactly what they're doing! Chris Myers is running up to hand him a live mic!

Eddie Sensation - What does this idiot have on his mind? Why doesn't he just take a hike back to The Filthy Begger� drown his sorrows with a few cold ones and shut up!

The Informer - Oh, I have a feeling he's going to do anything but that, Eddie!

Vic Canon - Fallen Angel has the mic! Let's listen up!

Fallen Angel - Diamante, you filthy son-of-a-btich! Pay attention, asshole! This is the last straw! No more of this "Diamond Stud" bullshit! Now I want the both of you to listen to me very carefully, and take in every single word. What a waste of everyone's time this has been. The training, the paperwork, the whole fucking lot, all for nothing. Hacker didn't defeat me. Hacker couldn't defeat me in a situation like this if he tried. It's shame that this piece of talentless crap could take my International title belt, simply due to twisted politics. And it's an even bigger shame that "The Diamond Speedbump" was ever given the power to make this happen! Well... Like I said... This is definately the last straw! For months now... And I literally mean months... Everyone in the EWA has had to put up with your crap and that of your counterparts, Delsante, Deuce and Zed, not to mention that everytime you've got something important to face up to, you send one of your lackeys, Enzo, or the Big Johnsons. Well, it's all been going on for far too long, and it's time that somebody did something about it!

Eddie Sensation - Ha! What's Fallen Angel going to do? He has no stroke!

The Informer - Yeah, but he's full of rage right now� and rage can drive a man to do some pretty impressive things!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Oh really? Just what are you, of all people, going to do to bring "TDS" down? Come on boy� I'm anxious to hear!

Vic Canon - As we all are!

Fallen Angel - Don't worry, Nick... I'm not about to put a bomb under your bed, or poison your desert. I'm a fair man, and despite the fact that all the events that have taken place in the last seven months have been stacked against me, I'm going to end this with style. So take note. I want to face you in the ring, Diamante. A one on one match with a very interesting stipulation. You put your motherfucking conntract on the line.

Eddie Sensation - HAHAHAHA! WHAT?? THIS KID HAS LOST IT!

The Informer - THAT'S A GREAT IDEA!

Vic Canon - YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT IS! WHY SHOULD DIAMANTE HAVE MORE POWER AND STROKE THAN THE REST OF THE BOYS BACK STAGE?!

Eddie Sensation - Because he's worth it! Look at Nick� he's laughing!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Umm, sure� yeah, I see that happening! Fallen Angel, you're a moron, alright? You just head backstage� have yourself a few beers, and everything should be fine tomorrow morning. Well� except for the fact that you'll wake up beltless!

The Informer - Oh, how funny! What's a matter Nick� scared you'll lose?

Vic Canon - That's totally the case! Oh, look at those two! Hacker and Diamante are laughing up a storm in the ring! Since when did they become so chummy?

Fallen Angel - What's the matter, Nicky? You're not afraid are you? You're not afraid that a little beer-swilling moron like myself could end your glitz and glamour... just like that? Speak up, Nick! What's the problem? Scared I might have your number?!

Eddie Sensation - YEAH RIGHT! NOW THIS KID IS REALLY SNIFFING SOME FUMES!

The Informer - Look at Diamante, and listen to these fans! They're verbally taunting "The Stud"� and he's getting mad!

Vic Canon - But he's trying to hold it in!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Listen up, pal�

Fallen Angel - NO, DIAMANTE! YOU LISTEN TO YOU OVERRATED SNIVELLING PIECE OF SHIT! YOU'RE SPINELESS, NICK, AND IT'S DRAGGING YOU DOWN... No, Wait... IT'S DRAGGING EVERYBODY ELSE DOWN!!! THESE DAYS, IF SOMEONE ENTERS INTO A MATCH, THEY HAVE TO CONSIDER TWO THINGS... Are they good enough? And is Nick Diamante and the Goon Squad going to interfere. Well, not anymore. YOU WANDER AROUND LIKE YOU'RE TOP SHIT, TRYING TO CONVINCE THE WORLD THAT YOU'RE A GOD, BUT WHEN IT COMES TO THE CRUNCH, YOU BACK OUT!!! EVERY SINGLE TIME YOUR ASS IS IN DANGER OF GETTING WHAT YOU DESERVE, YOU HIDE IN THE SHADOWS, AND LET SOMEBODY ELSE TAKE THE RAP!!! SO WHEN NC 17 "PURE VIOLENCE" ROLLS AROUND, YOU AND ME WILL STEP INTO THE RING FOR YOUR CONTRACT!!! If you lose the match, you lose the contract, we'll even burn it to the ground and sniff the fumes. And finally, after all this time, you'll just be another one of us, with a standard EWA wrestling contract... WITH NO SPECIAL PRIVELAGES.

Eddie Sensation - NO WAY! THIS KID HAS LOST IT!

The Informer - I THINK IT'S A DAMN GOOD IDEA, AND THIS CROWD SEEMS TO THINK SO TOO!

Vic Canon - YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN!

Eddie Sensation - Well these people better calm down, because it ain't happening�

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - You want me to put my contract on the line?

Fallen Angel - DAMN RIGHT I DO!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - For what? For you? Who the hell are you?

Fallen Angel - You know damn well who I am, Nick. I'm one of the guys you've never had the guts to face man-to-man, in the ring. I'm one of the very few guys in this federation, who can bring your empire down! AND I'M THE ONLY WRESTLER IN THIS FEDERATION, THAT "THE DIAMOND SPEEDBUMP" NICK DIAMENTOS CAN'T DEFEAT!!! YOU'RE A GOD, RIGHT? THEN PROVE IT, YOU SACK OF SHIT!!! ENTER THE RING WITH THE FALLEN ANGEL, AND LET'S SEE HOW GOD-LIKE YOUR ASS REALLY IS!

The Informer - MY GOD! THAT A BOY, ANGEL! YOU TELL HIM!

Vic Canon - OH, DIAMANTE LOOKS FRUSTRATED!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - I suck?? I SUCK??

Fallen Angel - YOU SUCK, NICK!!! YOU FUCKING SUCK!!!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, BROTHER� THIS SUNDAY AT NC 17 "PURE VIOLENCE" 2000� IT'S GONNA BE JUST THAT! PURE VIOLENCE! AND I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE�

Eddie Sensation - NO! NICK, ARE YOU MAD!?!?!

The Informer - I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! HE SAID YES!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - UNDER ONE CONDITION�

Vic Canon - UH OH, WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - This Sunday, my contract will be hung 20 feet above the ring in a briefcase� and the first man to climb a solid steel ladder to get it, chooses my destiny here in the EWA! But since we're talking about destiny� I'll be DAMNED if this match don't have an impact on your career when I'm done kickin' your ass!

Fallen Angel - An "impact" on my career? Nick, you're mad! I have nothing for you to take! Hacker stole my chances of gaining heavyweight gold, and you just took my international belt away from me! BRING IT ON, FATBOY!!! ANYTHING YOU WANT, YOU CAN HAVE!!!

Eddie Sensation - YEAH!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Fallen Angel, this Sunday, if I climb those iron rungs and reclaim my "Diamond Studded Contract"�

The Informer - Look at that smile on his face!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - You know your buddy Chris Jericho? If I beat your ass� I WANT HIS BITCH FOR A MONTH! I WANT THAT WHORE OF HARDCORE� MANDI, FOR ONE MONTH! CAUSE "TDS" IS LOOKIN' FOR SOME LOVIN' AND ONE HARDCORE FUC�

Fallen Angel - YOU GOT IT, DIAMANTE!!! I LOSE THE MATCH AND YOU GET THE BITCH FOR A MONTH!! But here's some advice... If I was you I'd amputate my penis and send it to my mother for safe keeping, BECAUSE MANDI'S ASS IS SAFER THAN THE POPE'S! I'M GOING TO WIN, DIAMANTE! AND THEN I'M GONNA SMOKE YOUR CONTRACT! Oh yeah... Have a nice day.

Vic Canon - MY GOD, WHAT A MATCH??? "THE DIAMOND STUD" NICK DIAMANTE WILL TAKE ON FALLEN ANGEL IN A LADDER MATCH!

Eddie Sensation - HAHAHAHA!!! AND JERICHO'S BITCH IS GONNA BE ON THE LINE!

The Informer - GOOD GOD, WHAT A MATCH THAT'S GOING TO BE! CONTRACT FOR WOMAN, I GUESS!

Vic Canon - These fans sure as hell are loving it� but I don't understand! Fallen Angel was pretty quick to put his best friend's woman on the line! I can't imagine Jericho is too happy about that!?

Eddie Sensation - HA, I love it! Diamante with Mandi� HE'S GONNA SHOW THAT BITCH WHAT A WHORE'S REALLY SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE!

The Informer - MY GOD FANS, THINK OF THE MAGNITUDE OF NC 17 "PURE VIOLENCE" 2000! You absolutely can't miss that one this Sunday! Right now fans, we've got to take a commercial break! When we return, it'll be time for our MAIN EVENT! "The Diamond Stud" teams with The Hustler to take on Clayton Chandler and "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington! DON'T GO ANYWHERE� WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK!

Hacker - Well Rob...

[Just then, Tom Stone marches into the interview area and steals the mic from Rob DiMarco...]

Tom Stone - GIVE ME THIS DAMN MIC!!!! HACKER... FALLEN ANGEL.... DIAMANTE..... LISTEN THE FUCK UP... NICK, YOU THINK YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU PLEASE IN THE EWA?!?! DO YOU ENJOY MAKING YOURSELF THE REFEREE WHENEVER YOU PLEASE?!?! DO YOU LIKE F*CKING WITH ME, TOM STONE?!?! DIAMANTE... DO YOU THINK YOU'VE WON?!!? I HOPE TO HELL THAT YOU DON'T, BECAUSE FOR YOUR INFORMATION, EVERYTHING THAT YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO DO, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO REVERSE!! AND WE'LL START BY TAKING THIS TITLE...

[Stone grabs the International Title from Hacker...]

Tom Stone - ....AND SAYING THAT IT IS VACANT!!!

Hacker - WHAT?!?!?

Tom Stone - SHUT THE HELL UP YOU UNGREATFUL PEICE OF SHIT!! I AM REVERSING THE DECISION THAT NICK DIAMANTE MADE, AND ANNOUNCING THAT THIS TITLE IS VACANT!

Hacker - BUT I WON THE THING, WITH OR WITHOUT NICK!

Tom Stone - HACKER, YOU NEVER WERE THE INTERNATIONAL CHAMPION, AND NEVER WILL BE!!

Hacker - FUCK YOU, STONE!! THE LEAST I DESERVE IS A RE-MATCH!!

Tom Stone - You want a rematch?!?! YOU WANT A REMATCH?!?! FINE, YOU GOT IT.... BUT ONLY BECAUSE I'M SO CONFIDENT THAT YOU'LL NEVER WIN IT!!! THIS SUNDAY, AT NC 17 "PURE VIOLENCE" 2000, YOU WILL BE TAKING ON....... DINO DELSANTE, IN AN INTERNATIONAL TITLE MATCH! AND THAT'S FINAL! NOW GET THE HELL OUT OF MY WAY!

[Stone quickly walks away with the International Title in hand...]

Vic Canon - What the hell is going on here??

Eddie Sensation - Maybe Stone forgot to pay the electricity and lighting bill for the arena!! HAHA...

The Informer - Give it up Eddie!! Fans, we apologize, it seems we've lost power in th--

[A gold hue fills the arena, and green pyro goes off, as the fans become even louder and more anxious.]

Vic Canon - Ok, well, it seems like we haven't lost the power, but fans, again, we apologize, this is not scheduled, even we are wondering, as to what exactly is happening.

[Just then, "Honey, what do you do for money??" by AC/DC begins to blare over the PA system. The EWA big screen fades into a view of a video wall picture...]

Vic Canon - NO WAY!! THERE'S JUST NO WAY!!

The Informer - OY MY GOD!! WHAT IN THE HELL?? THIS CAN'T BE, THIS MAN, IT JUST CAN'T BE, IS THIS SOME KINDA JOKE?? DOES THIS MEAN WHAT I THINK IT DOES??

Vic Canon - How could it?? Vince told the world this Sunday that he was in contract talks with a wrestling organization that wasn't the EWA. It couldn't be, was he lying??

Eddie Sensation - SHUT UP CANON!! AHAHAHA!! HE'S BACK, HE'S BACK!! THE GOLDENBOY OF THE EWA IS BACK!! AHAHAHA I LOVE IT...

[Vince Di Nardo walks out from behind the curtains and stands on the ramp looking at his surroundings as the fans go crazy.]

Eddie Sensation - YES!! IT'S HIM!! IT REALLY IS HIM!! HE'S HERE IN THE FLESH!! I'VE PRAYED THAT WE WOULD SEE THIS MAN BACK FOR A LONG TIME, AND THERE HE IS...

The Informer - WOW!! It's him ladies and gentlemen, it's really him, Vince Black is bac--

Eddie Sensation - SHUT UP AND BOW YOUR HEADS IN RESPECT!!

Vic Canon - Could you get any more annoying, Eddie??

Eddie Sensation - Watch me!! Oh, wait, he's walking down the aisle he's making his way to the ring... He's got the mic. He's gonna speak, The Goldenboy has something on his mind, and he's gonna share it with us!!

The Informer - I honestly believe that this show can do without the pointless ramblings of Vince Black!!

Eddie Sensation - Hey didn't you see the video wall?? It's "Top Dollar" Vinny D, not Vince Black. AND, POINTLESS RAMBLINGS!?!? Listen here Informer, you suck at what you do and boring people comes naturally to you, how would you know what quality material is??

The Informer - Well, Eddie...

Eddie Sensation - SHUT UP!! He's got the mic!!

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - Well, well, well... Not much has changed in this rat hole, since last I gave it the precious gift that is my presence.

Vic Canon - PRECIOUS GIFT?? You've gotta be joking!!!

Eddie Sensation - Did your parents teach you any respect Vic??

Vic Canon - Why yes they did Eddie, and I'd say I have a great deal more respect than you've ever known!!

Eddie Sensation - Well then, why don't you shut your yap and pay your respects to the man on the mic?? The Goldenboy himself!!

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - This place is as pathetic as always it seems as though this place has been cursed since I left.

Vic Canon - You gotta be kidding me, this guy is so high on himself, it makes my stomach turn!!

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - Now I'm sure everyone's heard the rumors, and everyone's been talking, but no one really knew. No one really knew what would go down. People speculated, but I kept it difficult for them. I decided to keep my little visit a secret, simply because I can.

Eddie Sensation - That's right Vinny, you tell em, you can do whatever you want!!

The Informer - Why don't you just go in the ring and shine his shoes for god sakes??

Eddie Sensation - I will, and when I do, I'm gonna use your tongue to do it!!

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - You're probably all wondering exactly why I'm here... Everyone from the fans, to the wrestlers in the back, to those fools with Eddie at the announce table...

Eddie Sensation - HAHAHAHAHA!! Love ya man!! [Sticks up his thumb towards Vinny D]

Vic Canon - Despicable!!

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - But there are two men who are really puzzled right now... "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante and Tom Stone. Now, for Nick, it goes like this, this my friend, is your belated birthday gift!! I hope you like it!!

The Informer - Vic, did you say he was high on himself earlier??

Vic Canon - Yes, I did.

The Informer - It's not just that it's just downright, straight out conceit... He is one conceited son-of-a-...

Eddie Sensation - HEY!! Family programming here?!?!

Vic Canon - Ahhh, soak in it Eddie... Informer, Vince truly is one conceited SOB, just like his best friend, Nick Diamante... I sincerely doubt though, that that will ever change!!

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - Now, for Tom Stone, it's a totally different story. Tom, you ain't gettin no gifts from me. I mean, did you honestly think that I would never come back to the EWA?? Come on, why wouldn't I return to the place I helped create?? Tom, it's as simple as an american dollar bill, or a canadian dollar coin... I do what I want, when I want, and how I want, and there's nobody, and I mean not one single solitary human being that can stop the TOP DOLLAR!! Catchin my drift, Stoner-Boner??

The Informer - He really despises Stone, doesn't he??

Eddie Sensation - DUH!!

Vic Canon - Eddie, act decent for a second. You know, Vince and Tom go a long way back, a real long way, and for whatever reason, for the last year, Vince and Tom haven't been on good terms...

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - I don't like what I've been seein in this organization as of late, I don't like it one bit. I mean, that noose match bullshit?? What the hell was that?? Not to mention the fact that Tom Stone gave this organization into the hands of the 3D. I mean, Stone, what are you doing?? Did you forget everything I taught you about running a successful business?? Well god dammit, it ain't gonna happen anymore... I don't like you Tom, and you know it, but I love the EWA, and I'll do whatever it takes to keep it on the right track. So, because of the soft spot I have in my heart for the EWA, I've decided to take a course of action...

The Informer - Course of action?? What the hell is he talking about??

Eddie Sensation - I don't know, but I can tell this is gonna be BIG!!

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - As of this moment, I, "Top Dollar" Vinny D am announcing...

Eddie Sensation - WHAT!?!? WHAT?!?!

The Informer - Come on...

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - I am announcing, the signing of a new commissioner...

Eddie Sensation - Oh, this is good. This is really good!!

Vic Canon - Can he do this?? Does he really have the power to do this??

The Informer - Unfortunately, he does Vic...

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - So now, Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls, geezers and geezerettes of all ages, allow me to introduce to you, all the fans, your new EWA commissioner...

Eddie Sensation - WHO?? WHO??

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - ME!!!

Eddie Sensation - AHAHAHA!!! I LOVE IT, I LOVE IT!! FIRST THE 3DWA, NOW THIS!! TOM STONE HAS NO CONTROL OVER THIS ORGANIZATION!! AHAHAHA!!!

The Informer - WHAT?!? ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?! CAN THIS BE TRUE?!?!

"Top Dollar" Vinny D - AND THERE ISN'T A THING ANYONE CAN DO ABOUT IT, CAUSE IT'S WHAT I WANT, AND I ALWAYS GET WHAT I WANT, GUARANTEED!!

The Informer - FANS, DON'T GO AWAY! WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK!!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Yeah, cut the crap right there toots! Everybody from Stevie Wonder to Ray Charles can see tonight that Tom Stone is still trying to get his revenge on The 3 Dimensions of Wrestling, and namely with "The Diamond Stud"! Teaming me up with The Hustler. I'm surprised Stone just didn't stick me on the same team yellow-wannabee freak, Clayton Chandler!

The Hustler - Well, excuse me there, jackass, but it ain't no treat for me to be standing side-by-side with you either!

Rachel Stevens - Gentlemen, please! How do you expect to function as a unit tonight against the force of Chandler and Covington?

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Hey, I'm not functioning as a unit with nobody! Do I care about Covington? F*ck no! I'm here tonight to get my hands on that old-school sunnuvabitch, Chandler! Chandler, I heard your ass earlier attempt to put yourself over at my expense! Let me give you a warning there my pimply-faced little pal! Up until now, it's been all fun and games with you and I tryin' to shoot each other down with words. Tonight, BITCH... THAT CRAP ENDS! I'm gonna send your ass packing back to the land of the yellow bitches with twenty kids, AND YOU'LL BE ON THE STREETS BEGGING FOR JOB WITH YOUR OLD RINKY-DINK WRESTLING PROMOTION YOU USE TO WORK WITH!

Rachel Stevens - Hustler, how do you feel about that? It doesn't seem like Diamante is willing to work as a team, nor is he focused on victory!

The Hustler - Listen punk, and you better listen good. [pointing his index finger in Nick Diamante's face as he stands toe-to-toe with him] I don'tgive a FUCK what the hell your greasy Italian no-talent ass wants! I'm just here to get a piece of Cody Covington, and send that over-rated chump back down to the bottom of the EWA, WHERE HE BELONGS. I will not put up with anyof your shit, Diamante, just like I won't with Covington, so you better damn well watch yourself. If you cross the line, you'll make the biggest damn mistake in your life!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - You listen up, pal! [points at The Hustler's chest while getting right in his face] I MADE YOUR ASS! AND I CAN BRING IT DOWN WHENEVER THE HELL I SO DAMN PLEASE! Don't you start acting like a hot shot in front of my face or I'll smack that smile right off of it! [turns to the camera] TONIGHT, I'M COMING FOR YOU CHANDLER! AND IF ANYONE GETS IN MY WAY... be it Cody Covington, or even you Hustler... Watch out! Just watch... the f*ck... out! ENZO, LET'S GO!

[Diamante and Enzo walk off camera.]

Rachel Stevens - My goodness! Champ, how do you respond to that??

The Hustler - I got to watch out? I GOT TO WATCH OUT?! If Nick Diamante did have his head so far up his fat ass, he'd realize I'm the goddamn champion of this place, and I can take him out any time I damn well please! I don't give a shit about him, 3D, or any other hokey piece of crap that's standing back here in the locker room! I'm out for me and this title, but tonight, I got a special mission. TONIGHT I WANT CODY'S BLOOD. Cody Covington, you do NOT know what the hell kind of hole you have dug yourself into. THAT HOLE IS A FUCKIN' DEEP ONE, AND TONIGHT, I PLAN ON BURYING YOU IN IT! Get the hell out of my way!

Rachel Stevens - My, oh my. this one is going to be wild, and something tells me it's going to be ugly! Let's head on over to Rob DiMarco who's with Clayton Chandler and "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington!

Chandler - Odd teams, Rob. Inevitable outcome. Because you see, it was written by a man a long time ago that a Savior will come upon a land of despair and remove the cancer which inherits it. A man will ride forth into the EWA, Rob, and take the life of Nick Diamante. And as the great wise men stand in a semicircle around the crib of a young Clayton Chandler, they chant the name of the prophet. They chant the name of the Apocalypse. Am I scaring you? Fuck yeah. Because, Nick, tonight you die. Tonight it ends. TONIGHT, Nick Diamante, YOU BECOME A STATISTIC.

Rob DiMarco - Cody, this Sunday you have a Rematch for the EWA Heavyweight Title against none other than The Hustler! Are you looking forward to this match?? And do you feel as if you were screwed out of the EWA Heavyweight Title last Tuesday?

Cody Covington - How do I feel? HOW DO I FEEL?!

[Cody grabs DiMarco by the tie and gets in his face....]

Cody Covington - I feel DAMN good! I'm getting my title shot ain't I??

[Cody laughs in DiMarco's fearful face and then pushes him away...]

Cody Covington - Don't shit your pants just yet DiMarco, oh wait you already have. I haven't forgotten the stunt you pulled after Heat last week and Idon't plan on forgetting about that for a long time! Anyway, if you break itdown I do believe I was screwed. But I did screw the Hustler to become World Champ, so I guess its just Karma. Whatever I do will come back to me all that mumbo jumbo... bull sheeit! But does it really matter? Hustler won the title out of luck while I battled the EWA "great's" to capture that World Title and then Thrylla has to show up and screw me out of it! For no apparent reason also which pisses me off. Why in the hell would you do that to someone you know nothing about? Maybe its just because he thinks he's the "shit," at one time he was, but maybe all that hype was for nothing. Thrylla has been gone for a long time folks, don't expect the same OLE person you've seen in the EWA a year ago. Many things have changed from this year. Most importantly, I CAME to the EWA! I worked towards something that whole damn year! SOMETHING THAT YOU THRYLLA TOOK AWAY AND IF I DON'T HEAR A RATIONAL EXPLANATION FROM YOUR PART ITS CRYSTAL CLEAR THAT I'LL SEND YOUR ASS STRAIGHT INTO RETIREMENT!

[Cody takes a long pause and rubs his face, a wild look is in his eyes as he starts up again.....]

Cody Covington - What am I talking about anyway?! The world title will be mine if a couple days if I play my cards straight and that is all that matters. Hustlers victory party has been short lived so be prepared to be knocked from your pedestal and start all over again. You have been in the EWA almost as long as me but lately you haven't been impressing me one bit and I hardly consider you a World Champion, that's why I have to give my fans the hope. A hope that the EWA can have a World Champion that knows how to give autographs, and cut promo's weekly.... speakin of that, maybe I could teach you how to cut one.... but damn, that'd take almost as long as I was in the EWA! Thrylla, take this advice.... Don't get in my business again if you want to be safe. I'm telling you how it is, I have respect for you and all.... But I'm not going to be like "Thorn," or "BrinK," and suck up to you or kiss your ass from here to.... uhh.... Iceland?? When it comes to the EWA World Title... the BEST damn prize in the game. It's crystal clear that "The Top Prospect" doesn't play any games....

[Cody looks over at Chandler.....]

Chandler - I fuckin hate Iceland. You ready to go out there and beat some Hustlin' ass?

[Cody leaves and begins walking down the hall towards the ring.....]

Chandler - That's the spirit. Lets go kick some ass.

[Chandler shoves DiMarco out of the way and heads toward the ring.]

Rob DiMarco - Well, let's send it to ringside! And, Chandler, don't tell me to, um, bleep off this time, okay?

Chandler - [From the hallway] Fuck you.

The Informer - My goodness, there's some tension backstage!

Vic Canon - Especially between the team of The Hustler and Nick Diamante!

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, Stone did it on purpose� he's still pissed at the 3D for that whole 3DWA incident!

The Informer - Well, either way there is some real, pure hatred in this match!

Vic Canon - Hatred so strong that it made Clayton Chandler travel across the world and back into an organization that he hates? You bet!

Eddie Sensation - It's a real unique kinda situation here. Chandler hates Diamante, and the same is true reversed! Everyone knows of the hatred that has come between Covington and The Hustler over the EWA Title!

The Informer - Plus, Diamante and The Hustler are going to be forced to work together! Who knows if Covington and Chandler will� but I guess they've got common enemies tonight!

Vic Canon - Hey, not much more needs to be said on that front. Let's get this ball rolling!

Eddie Sensation - Yeah!

Chris Myers - This next match is scheduled for one fall, and is a Tag Team Match! Introducing first... standing 6' and weighing in at 240 pounds, from Shreveport, LA, Chandler!

["Ready or Not" by The Fugees blasts through the speakers, as Chandler steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

The Informer - Chandler looks� well, like he always does! This guy has an attitude, and he always seems to be in a good mood� for some reason.

Vic Canon - Good mood? I wouldn't exactly say that� but he does seem somewhat focused because he knows he's gonna get his hands on Diamante tonight!

Eddie Sensation - Ah, the dude's got a good poker face� that's all. Inside, he's terrified!

Chris Myers - And his Tag-Team partner... standing 6'6" and weighing in at 283 pounds, from Miami, Florida, "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington!

["Lithium" by Nirvana blasts through the speakers, as "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

The Informer - And here comes the former EWA Champion! Here's another focused guy!

Vic Canon - You know he's not pleased about having lost the Heavyweight Title last week, and he wants some revenge on The Hustler tonight!

Eddie Sensation - I hope they rip each other apart!

Chris Myers - And their opponents... First, accompanied to the ring by Enzo, standing 6'8" and weighing in at 292� pounds, from Toronto, Ontario, Canada, "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante!

["Got The Life" by Korn blasts through the speakers, as Enzo and "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante step out from behind the curtain and head towards the ring.]

The Informer - And there's the man of the hour. I still can't believe he's actually going to put his special contract on the line this weekend!

Vic Canon - Well, you can tell by the look in his eyes that he's motivated! Diamante isn't thinking about this Sunday�

Eddie Sensation - �HEY! AS A MATTER OF FACT, HE'S NOT EVEN WAITING FOR THE HUSTLER!!

The Informer - GIVE HIM CREDIT FOR HAVING GUTS HERE!! BUT IT'S NOT REAL SMART TO STEP INTO A RING WITH 2 GUYS!!

Vic Canon - BUT HE'S NOT ALONE� HIS HUGE BODYGUARD ENZO IS TRAILING CLOSE BEHIND!!

Eddie Sensation - WHAM!! WHAM!! DAMNIT!!! CHANDLER AND COVINGTON HAVE DIAMANTE TRAPPED IN THE CORNER!! WHOA! CHANDLER JUST KINDA SHOVED CODY ASIDE! HE WANTS DIAMANTE ALL TO HIMSELF!!

The Informer - BUT HERE COMES ENZO!! ENZO IS IN THE RING!!! HE TOWERS OVER CHANDLER!!

Vic Canon - Enzo shoves Chandler around� whoa, wait! Chandler just slid through the big giant's legs! He's right behind� NO! NO! YES! YES! HIROSHIMA!!! HIROSHIMA!!! CHANDLER JUST LOCKED HIROSHIMA ON THE BIG GIANT ENZO!!

Eddie Sensation - AHHHHHHHHHH!!! AND NOT COVINGTON IS WORKING ON DIAMANTE!! TOSSES HIM TO THE ROPES� WHAM!! POWERSLAM!!!

Chris Myers - And HIS Tag-Team Partner... standing 6'4" and weighing in at 242 pounds, from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, the EWA Heavyweight Champion, The Hustler!

["Walk" by Pantera blasts through the speakers, as the EWA Heavyweight Champion, The Hustler steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

The Informer - FINALLY THE HUSTLER IS HEADING OUT HERE! HERE COMES THE EWA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! AND THESE FANS LOVE HIM!

Vic Canon - MY GOD THIS ONE IS A WAR!! THE HUSTLER IS IN THE RING� uh oh, oh no! Cody Covington is there to meet him with some big boots!

Eddie Sensation - Chandler finally releases the hold on Enzo, but only because "TDS" was there to pound on him enough!

The Informer - How is the referee ever going to gain control of this match! HE CAN'T!

Vic Canon - OH NO! THE HUSTLER AND CODY COVINGTON'S WAR HAS SPILLED TO THE OUTSIDE!

Eddie Sensation - HOLY CRAP!! DID YOU SEE THE WAY THE HUSTLER AND COVINGTON BOTH ROLLED BETWEEN THE ROLES TO THE FLOOR! That would have ended any normal guy's career!

The Informer - IN THE RING� OH MY!! CHANDLER ATTEMPTS THE BODY SLAM DIAMANTE, BUT NICK SLIDES OVER TO THE BACK AND DELIVERS A REVERSE DDT!

Vic Canon - THERE'S SO MUCH HATRED IN THIS ARENA RIGHT NOW� IT'S UNBELIEVABLE!!

Eddie Sensation - HEY, SOMEONE GET HOLD OF THOSE TWO GUYS� "CRYSTAL CLEAR" AND THE HUSTLER ARE FIGHTING UP THE RAMP!

The Informer - HAS THE BELL EVEN SOUNDED??

Vic Canon - I'M NOT SURE, BUT A BELL ISN'T GONNA STOP THE BRAWL!! THE REF IS FOLLOWING COVINGTON AND THE HUSTLER UP THE RAMP!!

Eddie Sensation - THAT MEANS THERE'S NO REF IN THE RING WITH DIAMANTE AND CHANDLER!

The Informer - HEY� AND ENZO IS GOING TO CAPITALIZE ON THAT! ENZO IS ON HIS WAY UP INTO THE RING!!

Vic Canon - THE OTHER GUYS HAVE GONE BACKSTAGE!! THIS ONE IS UNCONTROLLABLE!!

Eddie Sensation - YEAH, BUT WHO CARES!! WE'VE GOT TWO MEN DOING THE DOUBLE TEAM ON CHANDLER!! ENZO AND DIAMANTE ARE WORKING IN CLASSIC FASHION!!

The Informer - YEAH, JUST LIKE COWARDS!!!

Vic Canon - BIG ENZO WHO STANDS AT AROUND 7'5" IS HOLDING DOWN CHANDLER BY THE NECK WITH HIS FISTS!! WHAM!! BAM!! HE'S POUNDING AWAY AT THE FORMER WORLD CHAMPION!!

Eddie Sensation - AND IN THE MEANTIME, DIAMANTE IS HEADING TO THE TOP ROPE!! WHAT'S HE GONNA DO??

The Informer - CHANDLER DOESN'T STAND MUCH CHANCE AGAINST THESE ODDS!!

Vic Canon - "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante is perched on the on the top turnbuckle� HE JUMPS� NO!! OH MY GOODNESS!!

Eddie Sensation - NO!! NO!! NO!! CHANDLER MANEUVERED ENZO SO HE WOULD BE IN THE PATH OF NICK DIAMANTE'S ELBOW SMASH!!

The Informer - THIS IS PURE INSANITY!! IF SUNDAY IS ANYTHING LIKE THIS, THEY SHOULD RENAME THE EVENT NC 17 "PURE INSANITY"!!

[Suddenly, a camera breaks away and takes us backstage! "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington and The Hustler are seen battling in a locker room among such wrestlers as Brett Bomb, Hacker and Rocky Blonde�]

Vic Canon - WHA� WHAT THE HELL?? WHERE ARE THEY???

Eddie Sensation - THEY'RE� THEY'RE� IN THE SHOWER?!?!?!? THESE GUYS HAVE FOUGHT ALL THE WAY BACK TO THE SHOWER AREA!!

The Informer - YES, IT SEEMS TO BE TRUE!! THEY HAVE MADE THEIR WAY ALL THE WAY INTO THE LOCKER ROOMS!!!

Vic Canon - WE'VE GOT MAYHEM IN TWO AREAS OF THE BUILDING! OUT HERE, CHANDLER HAS DIAMANTE ROCKING WITH SOME OF THE STIFFEST CHOPS I'VE EVER SEEN!!

Eddie Sensation - AND IN THE BACK� DAMN!! OH MY� LOOK AT THAT!! COVINGTON JUST SENT THE HUSTLER HEAD FIRST INTO ONE OF THOSE LOCKERS!!

The Informer - N..N..NO!! NO!! COVINGTON HAS THE HUSTLER'S HEAD ALMOST ENTIRELY INSIDE OF A LOCKER!!

Vic Canon - WHACK!! AND HE JUST SLAMMED THE DOOR RIGHT ON THE HEAD OF THE HUSTLER!!

Eddie Sensation - WE GOTTA GET BACK OUT HERE!! CHANDLER JUST� HOLY CRAP!! LOOK WHAT HE JUST DID!!!

The Informer - CLAYTON CHANDLER JUST RIPPED OFF THE T-SHIRT OF NICK DIAMANTE, AND HE'S CHOKING HIM WITH IT!!

Vic Canon - A couple of referees are restraining Enzo� and believe me, that's tought to do! But they're making sure he goes to the back!

Eddie Sensation - DAMNIT! COME ON ENZO! YOU CAN TAKE A COUPLE OF WIMPY REFS!

The Informer - OH... OH MY! LOOK WHAT CHANDLER IS DOING WITH THAT DIAMOND STUD T-SHIRT!!!

Vic Canon - HA! CHANDLER IS USING IT LIKE A TOWEL AFTER A SHOWER� AND LET'S JUST SAY HE'S DRYING THE AREA OF HIS BODY WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE!

Eddie Sensation - YEAH, WHAT A DISGRACE! YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT SHIRT IS WORTH??

The Informer - OH BUT DIAMANTE BARGES OUT OF THE CORNER WITH A VICIOUS CLOTHESLINE!! DAMN!! THAT ONE SENT CHANDLER FLYING�

Vic Canon - Let's not kid around here guys! Diamante is bigger than Chandler� he's closer to his prime than Chandler is� but Chandler does have more years of wrestling experience under his belt!

Eddie Sensation - Who cares! Diamante has the power and strength advantage over Chandler� Clayton is just a punk kid! He shouldn't be wrestling!

The Informer - Punk kid my ass! Chandler is one of the toughest men in this sport!

Vic Canon - BUT RIGHT NOW� DOWN!! DIAMANTE TAKES CHANDLER DOWN WITH A BRAINBUSTER!!

Eddie Sensation - BACK TO THE BACK� THE BACK!! THEY'RE IN THE HALLWAY NOW� OH CRAP!! THE HUSTLER JUST TOSSED COVINGTON INTO A PILE OF� IT LOOKS LIKE IT'S A PILE OF TOOLS� HAND TOOLS!!

The Informer - THOSE CAN BE DANGEROUS! THEY'VE GOT TO GET THOSE MEN BACK OUT HERE!

Vic Canon - Is this even a match? Has the bell rung?

Eddie Sensation - HA! I have no clue! WHO CARES! WE GOT SOME FIGHTIN' GOING ON!

The Informer - OH MY GOODNESS, THE HUSTLER HAS� HE HAS A WRENCH FOR GOODNESS SAKES!!

Vic Canon - WHAM!!! OH MY GOODNESS!! THE HUSTLER JUST CLOBBERED "CRYSTAL CLEAR" RIGHT OVER THE HEAD WITH THAT WRENCH!!

Eddie Sensation - HAHA, I LOVE IT!! AS BIGG DADD DEUCE ONCE SAID� THE HUSTLER JUST WENT CRAFTSMAN ON COVINGTON'S ASS!!

The Informer - Hey, look� behind the battle! Here comes those officials!! The same ones who forced Enzo to the back just moments ago!

Vic Canon - It looks like they've come to make sure this match ends up in the ring!!

Eddie Sensation - IN THE ARENA!!! RIGHT HERE� LOOK!! CHANDLER HAS DIAMANTE'S THROAT PRESSED UP AGAINST THE RAILINGS!!

The Informer - HE'S CHOKING DIAMANTE OUT!! USING THE STEEL AS HIS WEAPON!!

Vic Canon - THE FANS IN THE FRONT ROW ARE LOVING THIS ONE!! HEY, WHAT THE HECK??

Eddie Sensation - CHANDLER JUST� WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING?? HE STOLE A DRINK FROM SOME OLD LADY!! HA!

The Informer - NO HE DIDN'T!! SHE HANDED IT TO HIM!!! OHHHHHH MY GOODNESS!! CHANDLER TOOK A GULP OF THAT SODA, AND JUST WIPED THE BEST OF THAT CAN RIGHT AT DIAMANTE'S HEAD!!

Vic Canon - THE FANS ARE GETTING TO SEE A REAL RARE AND INSANE TREAT HERE ON HEAT TONIGHT!!

Eddie Sensation - HEY!! HEY!! OH LOOK AT THAT!! COME ON!!

The Informer - HAHA! THAT'S SOMETHING YOU DON'T SEE EVERYDAY!! CLAYTON CHANDLER IS HOLDING DIAMANTE FROM BEHIND� AND THIS ELDERLY LADY IN THE FRONT ROW IS GOING POSTAL ON HIM WITH SOME PRETTY HEAVY SLAPS!!!

Vic Canon - HA!! OH� OH NO!! DIAMANTE JUST USED HIS LEG TO NAIL CHANDLER IN THE GROIN AND FREE THE HOLD!! GOOD STRATEGY!! HEY� HEY, NO!! LEAVE HER ALONE!!

Eddie Sensation - WHAT THE HELL!?!?!?!?!?!? NICK!!???!! UHHHHHHH��

The Informer - WHAT THE��� DIAMANTE, IN AN ACT OF RAGE, OH MY GOD� YUCK!!! DIAMANTE IS KISSING THAT ELDERLY WOMAN SMACK ON THE LIPS!!

Vic Canon - WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ALL ABOUT??? DIAMANTE IS SICK AND TWISTED� I THINK I'M GONNA PUKE!!

Eddie Sensation - OH GOD, I THINK I'M GONNA HEAVE TOO!!

The Informer - NICK TURNS AROUND AND BEGINS POUNDING AWAY AT THE BACK OF CHANDLER!

Vic Canon - Diamante is messed up! This rivalry with Chandler has him all bent out of shape� HE JUST FRENCH KISSED A NINETY YEAR OLD WOMAN AND LAUGHED IN HER FACE!!

Eddie Sensation - GUYS, GUYS!! LOOK, LOOK, LOOK!!! THE OFFICIALS HAVE DONE IT!! THE TOP OF THE RAMP�

The Informer - THEY'RE BACK OUT HERE!! THE HUSTLER AND COVINGTON ARE BACK INSIDE THE ARENA!!

Vic Canon - LISTEN TO THESE FANS!! THEY'RE OUT OF CONTROL!!

Eddie Sensation - Ohhh� The Hustler has Covington by the hair and he's running him down to the ring�

The Informer - OHHHH, THEY'RE BUILDING UP MOMENTUM� HE'S GONNA THROW HIM INTO THE POST!!

Vic Canon - NO!! COVINGTON PUTS IN THE BRAKES!! AND THE CHAMPION GOES FLYING RIGHT INTO THE POST!! MY GOD!!

Eddie Sensation - Diamante is in the ring! What's he gonna do? A cross body over the ropes onto Chandler!

The Informer - He's planning something, no doubt! Wait a second� COVINGTON IS GETTING BACK INTO THE RING�

Vic Canon - HE'S SNEAKING UP BEHIND DIAMANTE!!

Eddie Sensation - NICK, WATCH OUT!!!

The Informer - HEY, HEY!! COVINGTON ROLLS UP DIAMANTE� SCHOOLBOY!! 1� 2� 3!!! HOLY CRAP!! COVINGTON JUST PINNED DIAMANTE!!

Vic Canon - WHOA!! THAT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE!!

Chris Myers - The winners of this match is the team of "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington and Clayton Chandler!!

Eddie Sensation - OH, HEY!! WAIT A SECOND!!! WHAM!! DIAMANTE JUST GOT UP AND NAILED COVINGTON WITH A THRUST KICK!!

The Informer - DAMNIT, HE LOOKS PISSED AND OUT OF CONTROL!!

Vic Canon - HE'S LOOKING AROUND� SPINNING� I THINK HE'S LOST IT!!! SERIOUSLY!!

Eddie Sensation - IT LOOKS LIKE HE'S LOOKING FOR SOMETHING� I THINK CHANDLER!! HE WANTS TO KICK CHANDLER'S ASS A BIT MORE!!

The Informer - NO! DIAMANTE SLIPS� OUT� HEY, HEY!! THAT'S OUR WATER!!

Vic Canon - DIAMANTE JUST GRABBED THAT GLASS PITCHER FULL OF WATER!! WHAT THE HECK�

Eddie Sensation - OH MY GOD, I THINK I HAVE SOME IDEA� HE'S BACK IN THE RING!! OH THIS IF GONNA BE SWEET!!!!

The Informer - OH MY GOD!! WHAT THE HELL IS A MATTER WITH THAT MAN!!! "THE DIAMOND STUD" JUST SMASHED THAT GLASS PITCHER OVER THE HEAD OF CODY COVINGTON!!

Vic Canon - HE'S NUTS!! HE'S LOST IT!! HE'S A DAMN PSYCHO WHO NEEDS TO BE INSTITUTIONALIZED!!

Eddie Sensation - WAIT!! WAIT!! WATCH OUT!!! CHANDLER IS BEHIND YOU!!!

The Informer - HIROSHIMA!!! HIROSHIMA!! CHANDLER IS TAKING "TDS" ON AN ALL-EXPENSES-PAID TOUR OR HIROSHIMA, AND HE'S MAKING SURE NOT TO LET GO UNTIL DIAMANTE HAS SEEN ALL THE SITES!!

Vic Canon - YOU MEAN ALL THE COLORS!! DIAMANTE'S FACE IS ALREADY STARTING TO CHANGE COLORS!!

Eddie Sensation - THIS IS NUTS!! THE RING IS COVERED IN GLASS!! CHANDLER IS CHOKING OUT DIAMANTE!!

The Informer - OH NOW LOOK!! THE HUSTLER HAS REGAINED CONSCIOUSNESS ON THE OUTSIDE, AND HE'S HE'S DRAGGING AN UNCONSCIOUS CODY COVINGTON OUTSIDE OF THE RING BY HIS FEET!!

Vic Canon - It looks like The Hustler is going to try to weaken up Covington with a few free shots!!

Eddie Sensation - SOMEONE GET THAT IDIOT CHANDLER OFF IF DIAMANTE!! HE WON'T RELEASE HIROSHIMA!!!

The Informer - WHAM!! WHAM!! WHAM!! WHAM!! THE HUSTLER IS TAKING SOME FREE SHOTS ON COVINGTON!!

Vic Canon - THAT'S NOT RIGHT!! THE MAN IS OUT COLD!!

[Suddenly, "Serial Thrilla" by Prodigy hits the PA system, and out comes Serial Thrylla.]

Eddie Sensation - IT'S THRYLLA!! SERIAL THRYLLA IS OUT HERE ON TUESDAY NIGHT HEAT!!! BUT WHAT THE HELL IS HE GOING TO DO??

The Informer - HE'S� HE'S� OHHHHHH!! HE'S IN THE FACE IF THE HUSTLER MAKING SURE HE DOESN'T TAKE ANY MORE CHEAP SHOTS ON COVINGTON!!

Vic Canon - THIS SUNDAY AT NC 17 "PURE VIOLENCE" 2000, THRYLLA WILL BE THE LAW, ORDER AND JUSTICE IN THE BIG MATCH!!

Eddie Sensation - SOMEONE GET THAT IDIOT OFF OF DIAMANTE!!! EARTH TO EWA!!!

The Informer - CHANDLER HAS DIAMANTE LOCKED UP IN HIROSHIMA!!! DIAMANTE IS FADING FAST!! THE HUSTLER IS BEING RESTRAINED BY SERIAL THRYLLA!! MY GOD!!! WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN AT NC 17 "PURE VIOLENCE"???

Vic Canon - OH MY GOD!! HUSTLER JUST SHOVED THRYLLA!!

Eddie Sensation - HIROSHIMA!!! BREAK THE HIROSHIMA!!!

The Informer - FANS, WE'VE GOTTA GO!! WE'LL SEE YOU SUNDAY AT NC 17 "PURE VIOLENCE" 2000!! GOODNIGHT!!