Elroy Johnson - Hewwo, my name is Leroy Johnson.

Leroy Johnson - Huh!? Dat be my name, ya fo'!

Elroy Johnson - Oh, sowwy bruva Leroy!

Leroy Johnson - Word up homey-dawg... s'all coo!

Elroy Johnson - Today, we'z here to rap on a vewy special subjek!

Leroy Johnson - Whut be dat, homey-G?

Elroy Johnson - It's be Nicky D'z birfday!

Leroy Johnson - Aw, shucks! I fergot ta thief him uh pwesent! Hez gonna beat me!

Elroy Johnson - Ha! I wemembered! Well, anywayz... to combemborate dis day..

Leroy Johnson - TO WHUT?

Elroy Johnson - Combemborate, ya heard? Is meanz ta wemember dis day when ur too ol' to have a life! Heh heh!

Leroy Johnson - Aww, I read ya! Ma momma combemborates all da time, Big E!

Elroy Johnson - I ain't Big E? Why you confussin' be wid Big Enzow?

Leroy Johnson - Ooops, sowwy dood!

Elroy Johnson - Uh huh, fagiven! But like I wuz sayin befo' Leroy started sprayin', today we'z here to combemborate Nicky D'z birfday wid a poem!

Leroy Johnson - YO! YOU WROTED A POEM? LEMME HERE! LEMME HERE!

Elroy Johnson - Ok G, she goez a wittle like dis...

[The lights in the room slowly dim and a single spotlight begins to shine on Elroy.]

Elroy Johnson - Back in tha day, befo' dere was da werd GAY... I knew a bruva, an I thunked he waz ok! Hiz name was Nicky D, an Itawian mafia-G, and he slapped me in da head an said "MOVE OUTTA MAH WAY, YOU FREAK!" As da dayz rolled on, ah noticed he was coo! Wid hiz black slicked bak hair, his necklace an diamond chair, I said "MAN, DIS GUY IZ OLD SKOOL!" Today ah am so proud, dat I wanna scweam out lowd... HAPPY BIRFDAY NICKY D! Az he starez in da mirrah everyday an sez "MAN, IT'S GOOD TO BE ME!"

Leroy Johnson - Whhhhat! DAT WAS SOME TITE SHEEEEET RIGHT DERE! Happy Birfday, Nicky D! Peace, luv and lossa WEED!

Elroy Johnson - WEED! GUY, YOU CAN'T SAY WEED ON TV!

Leroy Johnson - Nah man, I said we'd...

Elroy Johnson - Jigga Huh?

Leroy Johnson - Jigga Weed! Like, we'd betta get dis bitch kickin'!

Elroy Johnson - YA! ITZ TIME FO' THWEE D TUEZDAY NIGHT HEAT!

Leroy Johnson - Ya heard!

[The screen fades to black and back into the sold out arena in Mobile, Alabama where thousands of fand have packed the place for the second edition of 3DWA Tuesday Night Heat! As the camera pans across the fans, many signs are picked up on film, some of which read: "Zed is Dead Tonight!"... "COME HOME TOM STONE!"... "The Anatomy of Perfection Will Put You OVER!"... "HAPPY B-DAY TDS!"... "CRUMBLE CORNERSTONE, CRUMBLE!" and "This guy next to me smells like an immigrant!", among other things. We are then taken to a shot of the EWA on-air crew at ringside.]

The Informer - You want action and excitement? Glitz and glamor? Solid clean and fair wrestling action? Well... change the channel cause you'e not gonna get it here!

Eddie Sensation - HEY! YOU CAN BE FIRED FOR THAT!

Vic Canon - It's official wrestling fans! Hell week number 2 officially comes to a head right here tonight on 3DWA Tuesday Night Heat!

Eddie Sensation - Yeah baby! Tom Stone is nowhere in site, so who knows if and when he'll return? HA!

The Informer - Despite this company being bombarded with 3D paraphanilian, and being under the control of 2 of the biggest jerks in wrestling's history, we've still got a show to run!

Vic Canon - That's right, Informer! Tonight, in a very special Contract Match, Zed will get his very last opportunity to regain his EWA contract as he takes on "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante!

Eddie Sensation - WHOO YEAH! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, NICKY D! And Canon, you forgot to mention that "The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante will be the ref tonight! ZED'S CAREER IS AS GOOD AS DEAD IN THE 3DWA TONIGHT!

The Informer - In addition to that great match, we've also got a special rematch of sorts from last week! Last week The Hustler and "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington battled in a Riot Match, and tonight they're going to do battle in a 20 foot high Steel Cage!

Vic Canon - That should be a barn-burned, and it'll give us some clue over just which one of these men really is the number 1 contender to the EWA Heavyweight Title!

Eddie Sensation - AND TONIGHT... ANOTHER FIRST!! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?! IN THIS RING TONIGHT, WE'RE GOING TO SEE A WOMAN REMOVE HER CLOTHES!! FULLY!! NO TANS LINES BABY!! JUST A WHOLE LOTTA T & A!! WHOOO! GOD BLESS THE 3D!!

The Informer - That's right! In a very special Strip Tease Match, "The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante will battle "The Franchise" Chris Jericho! Either Tracey Lane or The Whore of Hardcore, Mandi will remove their clothes depending on their man's performance!

Vic Canon - Realistically, I'm hoping for a draw. Uh hem, sorry... we've also got a match that pits Fallen Angel against a Mystery Opponent! Fans, we have no clue who it is!

Eddie Sensation - I DO! And Tom Stone ain't gonna like it!

The Informer - Plus, after weeks and weeks of suspence, FINALLY the "Wildcard" teams will be announced for this Sunday's "Any Means Necessary" pay-per-view extraviganza! That and so much more here tonight on 3DWA Tuesday Night Heat!

Zed - Before I begin my little speech, I'd like to ask for The Ring announcers to remain silent, as well as the fans. I have some things to get off my chest, and I'd like to do so with everyones undivided attention.

[The Announcers take their headsets off, as the fan's voices sink to almost inaudible whispers. Santoro leans on the side turnbuckle as Zed, whom is positioned in the center of the ring, stands before the world to give his speech. Zed signals to a tech crew guy to cue "Wicked Game" by Chris Issac to play faintly in the backround as Zed speaks to the world. As the music starts, Zed begins to speak.]

Zed - Ladies and Gentlemen of the world, I'm here tonight to fight for my EWA contract. I have no Pregnant Women or any sort of hostage to bribe officials with, so I can wrestle here again. I have only myself, and my abilities to rely on. I must be self-reliant tonight, and I must have upmost faith in myself if I am to once again acquire my EWA contract. However, I have to overcome a rather large obstacle in order to do this. I must one of the most well-known wrestling figures ever, one of the most prominent men in the 3D stable, and one of two men currently in charge of the "3DWA". I'm sure you all know, but tonight I must go against Wrestling's most hated figure, and feared commodity. I must face none other than "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante..., with Dino Delsante acting as guest referee....

[The fans remain silent, yet excited at the mere mention of tonights main event match. Zed takes a deep breath, and continues speaking.]

Zed - In case things take a turn for the worst tonight, I would just like to say to everyone here that I had a lot of fun here in the EWA. I have many fond memories here in the EWA, dating back to when I won my first title, The EWA North American Title, by defeating X-Treme. Do you fans remember that?

[The fans begin to cheer, and acknowledge that memorable and early moment in Zed's EWA career. Zed smiles, and begins to speak again.]

Zed - Or the time I defeated The Wildman for the International Title? The time I beat Thorn in a Duke Dignity Match. And then there was the time I faced NoMaD in a one on one match on one of the old Friday Fever shows, and beat his ass in a clean match. Or when I won the Extreme Title by taking on DMX, Thorn, and NoMaD in a four way, first ever Suicide in the Sky match. And then who could forget the two times I defeated Deuce, the first time marking the beginning of my long awaited Heavyweight Title reign. And to this very day, I remain the LONGEST REIGNING Heavyweight Champion, with 78 days, just barely beating longtime EWA Legend Serial Thrylla who had 77. I have many fond memories here, and I'm very much afraid that no more good times will come...because if I lose my match tonight...the EWA really will see the end of Zed....and that scares me...because....well...I like to think of the EWA.....as...well....my home....

[Zed begins to get choked up, a lump forms in his throat, and tears actually falls from his eyes to the canvas of the ring. He staggers, but tries to keep his cool and continues speaking.]

Zed - ...I just...well...want you fans to know I do care. I've always been the badass heel of this place...but...I do care. I care for this place...the wrestlers...the people...you fans...everything. And if things don't go down in favor of me tonight...please...keep me in your memories, and remember the impact I made on this place, even if it is considered a little one. I love this place...and I don't want to be banned from it forever...please folks...keep my memory alive if things go bad and unfairly tonight. And if I do win tonight, I can assure you, you'll see a new Zed. A face Zed. The Zed that will end this terror that the 3D is causing to a great fed like the EWA. Tonight folks, I'm giving it my all, and I pray...I pray to god...that I can come out on top....so please...bear with me folks......because I'm trying...and will try....to be the leader that this federation needs during this "3DWA" era. Tonight ladies and Gentlemen, I will sarcrafice my body, and show heart I had when I first joined this federation. Tonight, by god, one way or another...I WILL leave Nick Diamante UNFORGIVEN!!!!

[The fans begin to erupt as Zed tosses the mic out of the ring and poses for the fans, maybe for the last time. Santoro puts his arm around Zed and walks him out of the ring, and down the rampway toward the locker room area. This interview alone, may go down as one of Zed's softest moments in wrestling history...]

"Reverend" Nuno Nitrowalawitz - Brett Bomb?? Has the poor child been harmed?? With a name like that, he must be ill! But that's okay... The Reverend is here!

Rob DiMarco - "Reverend"... if you don't mind me asking, why the sudden change in name and attitude for you? The wrestling world has been puzzled with your actions as of late.

"Reverend" Nuno Nitrowalawitz - Puzzled? Yes... you are all puzzled! You people are the reason for my sudden "change in attitude", or whatever you call it. He is coming... and when he does, he will judge all!

Rob DiMarco - Umm, sure... ok. Nuno, this Sunday at Any Means Necessary, you, along with the entire EWA, will get the chance to become the EWA Heavyweight Champion. Later tonight, the "Wildcard" teams will be announced. Realistically... how good of a chance do you think you have to legitimately become EWA Heavyweight Champion this Sunday?

"Reverend" Nuno Nitrowalawitz - Robert, my goal is not to win this peice of tin. I will not fight another man just to be crowned "king"... There already is a King! A king higher and more powerful then any of you!! And when he comes, you will all be sorry!

Rob DiMarco - Alrighty then... let's head over to Rachel Stevens who is standing by with newcome Brett Bomb.

Brett Bomb - Well, so far things have been running smoothly for me, everythings just as planned, but I have a gut instinct that that may change. As of now I'm 3DWA North American Champion and proud of it, as of late Nick and Dino current owners of 3DWA are complimenting my ability and about my mic skills but I guess they want me to fight again tonight because they didn't catch my debut match......

Rachel Stevens - Two weeks ago you fought Nuno Nitrowalawitz in a last minute match. You came from out of the crowd and nailed him with a big move! Tonight, you have him one on one! Do you think the results will be the same in this non-title match? He is the champ, you know?

Brett Bomb - I've beaten this guy once and I'll beat him again! In my debut match I defeated him with extreme ease to acquire the North American Title, now I understand that this is NOT a debut match. I know and am sure that Nuno damn knows that tonight he's gonna take a second beating unless of course he sicks a few of his henchmen after that, Nuno being such a popular guy. Frankly it doesn't matter if this is a title match anyways because everyone knows that even if the title was on the line it wouldn't change hands and I shall become the indisputed victor and for the second time defeat Nuno Ni.... I'm not even gonna try sayin' his name!

Rachel Stevens - This Sunday, you're going to be one of the participants at the first ever Any Means Necessary card. Realistically, you can do the impossible and become EWA Champion, just like that! What do you think the chances of that happening are?

Brett Bomb - Well Rachel I don't wanna jump to any conclusions, but I think my chances are about as good as everyone else's well other than Nuno, hehe... I think it's gonna be a great match, and even if I don't win the strap I'm still gonna do some major damage! But before talking about the Pay-Per-View, I think I should just worry about tonight, wait what am I talking about?�? Worry about Nuno, hah, I must be outa my mind, I'm just in the mood to go out and kick some major ass, see ya Rachey-baby!

Rachel Stevens - Thanks a lot, Mr. Bomb. Best of luck to you tonight. Informer, we've got a great match coming up!

Vic Canon - Well, first of all, the guy is as cocky as the day is long! He beat Nuno Nitrowalawitz two weeks ago in an impromptu match, and now he thinks he's the EWA North American Champions! EARTH TO BRETT BOMB� YOU'RE NOT THE CHAMPION! NUNO IS!

Eddie Sensation - Hey now! No need to be cruel! Leave this guy alone! He's obviously psyched about being here in the 3DWA! And he's happy to hold a victory over Nuno Nitrowalawitz!

The Informer - Well, he's about to face "Reverned" Nuno Nitrowalawitz in another NON-TITLE match! We'll see what he's made of!

Vic Canon - With that, let's head up to Chris Myers!

Chris Myers - This next match is scheduled for one fall, and is a Non-Title Match! Introducing first... standing 5'11" and weighing in at 204 pounds, from Poland, the EWA North American Champion, "Reverend" Nuno Nirtowalawitz!

["Sugar" by System Of A Down blasts through the speakers, as the EWA North American Champion, "Reverend" Nuno Nirtowalawitz steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

Chris Myers - And his opponent.... Brett Bomb!!

[Brett Bomb steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

Eddie Sensation - YEAH! THAT-A-BOY BRETT! HAHAHA!!

The Informer - See what I mean! He grabs the North American Title away from the ref! AND NOW HE'S HOLDING IT ABOVE HIS HEAD! YOU'RE NOT THE CHAMPION!

Vic Canon - Nuno is making no fuss over this situation. He's found his peace over the last few weeks!

Eddie Sensation - HEY!! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?? BRETT BOMB JUST NAILED NUNO WITH THE BELT!! HAHAHAHA!! WHAT A WAY TO KICK OFF HEAT!

The Informer - COME ON!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS IDIOT?? FIRST HE THINKS HE'S THE CHAMPION� NOW HE CAN'T EVEN CONDUCT HIMSELF LIKE A PROPER WRESTLER!!

Vic Canon - HEY!! GET THIS GUY OUT OF HERE!! LEAVE ME ALONE!! LEAVE MY CHAIR ALONE!!

Eddie Sensation - HAHAHA!! WHY IS IT THAT THEY ALWAYS GO FOR VIC'S CHAIR??

The Informer - GOOD GOD STOP THIS INSANE IDIOT!! I'VE HEARD OF PEOPLE TRYING TO MAKE A NAME IN THIS BUSINESS!! BUT THIS IS TOO MUCH!!

Vic Canon - GUYS!! HE'S ACTUALLY CLIMBING THE TOP ROPE WITH A CHAIR IN HIS HAND!! THE REF IS CALLING FOR THE BELL!! AND HE'S WAVING IN FOR REINFORCEMENTS!!

Eddie Sensation - OH GOD! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!! THIS IS GONNA BE AWESOME!!

The Informer - GET THAT MAN DOWN!! NOW!! THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WRESTLING!! DAMNIT!!

Vic Canon - NITROWALAWITZ IS GETTING TO HIS FEET, AND HE HAS NO CLUE WHAT'S GOING ON!!

Eddie Sensation - HEY NUNO!! TURN AROUND!! YOU'RE ABOUT TO TASTE SOME STEEL IN A VERY PAINFUL WAY!!

The Informer - BRETT BOMB JUMPS OFF THE TOP ROPES!! GOOD GOD!! NO!! HE JUST NAILED NUNO RIGHT OVER THE HEAD WITH A STEEL CHAIR OFF THE TOP ROPE!! GET THIS IDIOT OUT OF HERE NOW!! NOW!!

Vic Canon - DINO AND NICK DO AND HIRE SOME IDIOT OFF THE STREETS WITHOUT TOM'S PERMISSION, AND THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS!! THIS GUY IS SO DESPERATE TO GET OVER WITH THE BOSSES HERE IN THE 3DWA THAT HE'S GOING ALL OUT!!

Chris Myers - Ladies and gentlmen, the winner of this match by Disqualification is "Reverend" Nuno Nitrowalawitz!

Eddie Sensation - HA! STUPID CHRIS MYERS! THERE HE IS! HE'S THE HOTTEST PROSPECT IN THE 3DWA, AND THERE'S NO DOUBT ABOUT THE FACT THAT THIS GUY MUST HAVE CAUGHT THE SEXY MF'S ATTENTION WITH HIS ACTIONS HERE!! HE IS BRETT BOMB!!

The Informer - YEAH, YEAH!! WHATEVER!! HOW YOU CAN CONDONE THESE ACTIONS IS BEYOND ME, EDDIE. LET'S JUST GET OUT OF HERE AND SEND IT TO THE BACK! THIS IS TOO MUCH! The Wildman is standing by!

The Wildman - Is that the only damn question you know how to ask me, DiMarco? It seems like every time you get me out here, you ask me if I think what Diamante and the rest of the 3D are doing is some sort of set up. Do me a favor and ask that same f*cking question again, but answer it yourself. Stop wasting my time with stupid questions that everyone else already knows the answers to, okay? Next f*cking question please.

Rob DiMarco - Earlier in the week, we heard "The Diamond Stud" say that he was beginning to get sick of you. He thinks that you will never improve like he originally thought you would, and as soon as he gets a chance, he wants to finish you off in the ring. How do you respond to those comments?

The Wildman - Well Nick, it's about damn time! But don't you think you've had the chance to 'finish me off' plenty of times in the last few weeks? What's stopping ya, huh? Is it the fact that you're too busy? Are you waiting for the right moon to set on the perfect night to strike? Or is it fear that's holding you back? Fear is a powerful thing, Diamante, as I'm sure you already know. If allowed, it can control your very heart and soul. Is that what's going on? Is that why the many chances you've had to take me out have been passed so many times? Is it the fact that you're full of bullsh*t? Is it because even you aren't 100% sure of what you wanna do with me? One night you're trying to take me out by double-teaming me, and then you're actually helping me win a match. I think you're a little confused. I don't know what to think about it anymore, frankly. So what I'm gonna do is this: Nothing. I'm just gonna sit back and watch, and maybe things will turn out the way you want. Maybe they won't.

Rob DiMarco - It's time for Any Means Necessary this sunday. Later tonight, we're going to hear the official announcement as to just who the teams are at this event. What do you think your chances are of coming out as the EWA Heavyweight Champion this Sunday?

The Wildman - I have so many answers for this question......but I'm not gonna bore you with that tonight. I would probably just confuse you or someone like The Hustler. Instead, I'm gonna leave you, go out there, and procede to kick the living snot outta "The Seat Seller." Thank you very much. And oh.....sorry for jumpin' ya last week.

Rob DiMarco - Thank you, Wildman, and best of luck to you. Let's go to Rachel Stevens who is ready to speak to Thurston Howell.

"The Seat Seller" Thurston Howell - Two birds with one stone, that is impossible!! I mean it can happen but they are trying to kill off "The Seat Seller" Thurston Howell, and Rachel you know that can't be done. I mean one bird will be killed in this match and that is the Wildman. I don't have anything against you Wildman but when I step in that ring, friend or foe, you know you will always get an ass whipping from myself. But I guess the 3D will get one thing accomplished tonight and that is having the Wildman put on the shelf, because I can tell you Wildman you will not walk by me, actually you won't be walking at all, I can already see it, you leaving the ring on a stretcher and it will be your last time stepping in the ring. So I guess I will be doing "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante a favor tonight, now he won't be embrassed again by the Wildman. But for you Delsante, you won't get your wish, you will never get your wish, I will always be here!! And this match will just tune me up even more for "Any Means Necessary"!!!

Rachel Stevens - Tonight, what will be your strategy in this match against The Wildman?

"The Seat Seller" Thurston Howell - My stragegy, well do you think I really need one? The only strategy that I know is to beat the Wildman down until he can't be beaten anymore, and then pin him right in the center of the ring. And with us tied to each other with a leath strap that ensures you that the Wildman won't be able to run away from me. So all I can say is you better fight your ass off Wildman or you will be toasted like the rest of my damn opponents!!

Rachel Stevens - This difference of opinion between you and Delsante seems like it may never end! This Sunday at Any Means Necessary, you and Dino will most likely get a hold of each other during the match that pits The 3 Dimensions of Wrestling against The Syndicate. Will you be focused on bringing the EWA Heavyweight Title to The Syndicate, or will you use this night to get revenge on Dino Delsante?

"The Seat Seller" Thurston Howell - Well why would I only want to be focused on winning the Heavyweight Title or why would I only want to be focused on destroying Dino Delsante? I mean it doesn't take a genius to figure out I am going to accomplish both!! First of all I will get my hands on Delsante and after I beat his ass he won't want to come back for anymore because all of it between me and him will end at "Any Means Necessary", that is where it will all be settled. Then then after that the Every Man For Himself type of match in the main event will be a blast. I will run over and demolish every damn EWA superstar that gets in my way because I am that damn good. And it is for the World Heavyweight Title, so friend or foe, you will have to go!! You can stamp a guarantee on that one Rach. Because I make the money, I make the rules, and I made you!!

Rachel Stevens - Thank you Mr. Howell and best of luck tonight! Let's send this one back to ringside!

Vic Canon - It has been a while, no doubt about that. And tonight's match should quench the fans thirst for pure brutality. The rules to a Leather Strap Match are very unique!

Eddie Sensation - Ya damn right they are. Both The Wildman and Thurston Howell are gonna be connected by a huge 10 foot leather strap on both their left wrists. You've gotta drag your opponent far enough so that you can touch all 4 turnbuckle pads to win! And of course, the strap can be used as a weapon!

The Informer - It is a brutal match, and I can almost hear the smack of leather against skin right now!

Vic Canon - But the odd thing about this match is the competitors in it. We all know that "The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante and "The Seat Seller" Thurston Howell have been involved in a very bitter rivalry dating back to The Full Revolution 2. And we all know that "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante and The Wildman have also had their issues as of late.

Eddie Sensation - Delsante and Diamante are smart! They're throwing each other's enemies to the wolves and forcing them to fight amongst each other! It's the best way to kill 2 dumb birds with one big-ass stone!

The Informer - Well, I wouldn't have worded it quite that way, but I guess it's the truth. With that, let's head on up to Chris Myers who's in the ring!

Chris Myers - This next match is scheduled for one fall and is a Leather Strap Match! Introducing first... standing 6'4" and weighing in at 304 pounds, from Indianapolis, Indiana, The Wildman!

["Calm Like A Bomb" by Rage Against The Machine blasts through the speakers, as The Wildman steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

Vic Canon - The Wildman looks in great shape as usual!

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, but this guy is a hot head! He never calms down and he's always pissed off! That can't be good for a guy!

Chris Myers - And his opponent� standing 6'4" and weighing in at 248 pounds, from Greenwich, Conneticuit, "The Seat Seller" Thurston Howell!

["Faith" by Limp Bizkit blasts through the speakers, as "The Seat Seller" Thurston Howell steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

The Informer - Guys, someone mentioned it earlier� but the crowd doesn't seem to be giving Howell his normal ovation. I think after he DDT'ed Tracey lane, a lot of people lost respect for him.

Vic Canon - It's true� some of these people are even booing him. I guess it's just one of those things that will fade with time.

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, well� if you ask me, this guy has a right to be frustrated. A month ago The Syndicate was supposed to be the best thing since sliced bread. However, unity isn't one of their strengths. The Hustler has been embroiled in a situation where he is very disappointed about being the number 1 contender for the EWA Heavyweight belt, yet not being able to wrestle Deuce, who is injured.

The Informer - There is a wedge between The Syndicate, so it seems. And the loss of the EWA Tag Titles by Extreme Velocity couldn't have helped matters much.

Vic Canon - In the ring right now, referee Lance King is making sure both men have the strap tied trimly around their left wrists.

Eddie Sensation - I always loved these matches! Nobody can run away! And the strap reminds me of my childhood!

The Informer - You were a bad kid, weren't you!

Eddie Sensation - And damn proud of it! HA!

Vic Canon - The bell rings, and this one is on it's way! Both The Wildman and Thurston Howell are circling here, both pulling on the strap trying to get leverage!

Eddie Sensation - HOT DAMN! HOWELL JUST USED THAT STRAP AND SMACKED THE WILDMAN IN IT! RIGHT IN THE FACE!

The Informer - AND THE WILDMAN RETALIATES WITH A HUGE SPEAR!! AND SOME RIGHT HANDS! WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! THE WILDMAN IS ON FIRE!

Vic Canon - What a way to begin this thing! Howell quickly slides outside of the ring, but he can't go far because of the strap!

Eddie Sensation - HOLY CRAP! THE WILDMAN JUST TUGGED ON THAT STRAP WITH ALL HIS FORCE AND BOTH HIS HANDS, AND HE SENT HOWELL RIBS-FIRST INTO THE RING APRON!

The Informer - This match is intense! But in the back of my mind, I'm still waiting for The Sexy MF's to come out here and ambush these two men! It's only natural, because that's how the 3D operates!

Vic Canon - The Wildman quickly slips to the outside as well! Howell is draped over the guardrail holding his ribs! That shot was great strategy! Oh no! The Wildman is trying to get some slack on that strap!

Eddie Sensation - WHACK! WHACK! GODDAMN! THE WILDMAN IS TEACHING HOWELL SOME DISCIPLINE THE OLD FASHION WAY! Damn! Look at the welts on Howell's back! His back is redder than a bloody Mary!

The Informer - Howell is cringing in pain and attempting to walk away to the other side of the rin� OH MY GOD! WHAT A BRILLIANT MOVE! HOWELL MANEUVERED HIMSELF AROUND THE RING POST SLIGHTLY AND THE PULLED THE WILDMAN INTO THE STEEL POST!

Vic Canon - Did you hear that thud? That was The Wildman's head connecting with steel! Steel on flesh! That isn't human!

Eddie Sensation - BUT IT SURE AS HELL SOUNDED NICE! HA!

The Informer - Howell is holding those ribs, but he's trying to work around the pain! Howell procedes to stomp The Wildman who is out cold on the arena floor!

Vic Canon - Howell needs to get The Wildman into the ring so he can touch the turnbuckles!

Eddie Sensation - OH NO! It looks like he has some other plans here! WHAM! WHAM! YEAH BABY! WHAM!

The Informer - HE'S BEATING THE HELL OUT OF THE WILDMAN JUST LIKE AN ANIMAL!

Vic Canon - DAMNIT! THE SOUND OF THE LEATHER ON FLESH DISGUSTS ME!

Eddie Sensation - Howell is a man possessed here! HOLY� HE WON'T STOP WHIPPING THE WILDMAN!

The Informer - NO! NO! NOW HE'S CHOKING OUT THE WILDMAN WITH THE STRAP! HE'S WRAPPING IT AROUND HIS NECK DAMNIT!

Vic Canon - WHAT HAS GOTTEN INTO THURSTON HOWELL?? THIS GUY IS A MADMAN! AND THE FANS ARE ACTUALLY BOOING HIM!

Eddie Sensation - Guys! He's doing what he has to do in order to win here!

The Informer - FINALLY HE RELEASES THE WILDMAN! I can't believe Howell here! He has nothing against The Wildman! Why would he do this??

Vic Canon - I have no earthly idea!

Eddie Sensation - Hey! Howell is doing what he has to do! You think he likes being in this match knowing before all is said and done, he may get ambushed by The Sexy MF's? No! Of course not! He's gonna beat the hell out of The Wildman and get his ass out of here before it's too late!

The Informer - Howell finally brings The Wildman into the ring! And look! Finally� he's trying to end this thing!

Vic Canon - ONE! Thurston Howell has touched one corner! He's 25% closer to ending this match!

Eddie Sensation - The Wildman is literally being dragged across the ring! I like this side of Thurston Howell! He's brutal!

The Informer - Yeah, but how brutal does he have to be? This is competition! Not attempted murder!

Eddie Sensation - Hey, whatever it takes to win! You think they put that strap in there to promote competition? Hell no! They did it for brutality!

Vic Canon - TWO! Guys! Thurston Howell has touched two of four pads! This one is half way done!

Eddie Sensation - You better believe it!

The Informer - THE WILDMAN IS UP! HE'S UP TO HIS FEET!

Vic Canon - I don't think Howell noticed! He's not even facing The Wildman!

Eddie Sensation - OH MY! DAMN! WHAT A MOVE! THE WILDMAN TUGGED ON THAT STRAP AND PULLED HOWELL RIGHT INTO A BULLDOG!!

The Informer - THE WILDMAN IS BACK IN THIS CONTEST!

Vic Canon - I DON'T KNOW WHAT NICK HAS BEEN TALKING ABOUT, BECAUSE THE WILDMAN IS AS WILD AS EVER!

Eddie Sensation - NO WAY! The Wildman is a wuss compared to what he once was!

The Informer - HEY! NO! WAIT! DAMNIT! HERE COMES THE SEXY MF'S� AND THEY'VE GOT REINFORCEMENT!

Vic Canon - LUMBER! BASEBALL BATS TO BE EXACT! AND THEY HIT THE RING!

Eddie Sensation - JESUS CHRIST! "THE DIAMOND STUD" JUST BROKE THAT BASEBALL BAT OVER THE BACK ON THE WILDMAN'S HEAD!

The Informer - THIS IS SICK!! STOP THEM!!

Vic Canon - "THE CORNERSTONE" JUST CLIPPED THE KNEE OF THURSTON HOWELL! COME ON! STOP THIS BRUTALITY!

Eddie Sensation - HEY! IT WAS BRUTAL WHEN HOWELL DDT'ed TRACEY LANE! AN INNOCENT WOMAN! HE DESERVES THIS!

The Informer - WHY CAN'T THEY WAIT UNTIL ANY MEANS NECESSARY?? WHY NOW??

Vic Canon - OFFICIALS ARE FLOODING THIS RING! I CAN'T BELIEVE THESE MEN!! DIAMANTE AND DELSANTE SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF THEMSELVES!! THIS WAS A SET UP! A SET UP ALL ALONG!

Chris Myers - Ladies and gentlemen, the official decision of this match is a no contest!

Eddie Sensation - YEAH BABY, YEAH! LOOK THAT THE TAG CHAMPIONS! THE OWNERS OF THIS COMPANY ARE SHOWING THE EMPLOYEES WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DON'T PLAY BY THE RULES!

The Informer - I'm not even going to address that comment! Fans, we've got to go to a commercial! We'll be right back!

Fallen Angel - Hell no!! Who the hell tells you to ask me these stupid questions??

Rachel Stevens - How can you possibly prepare for a match when you don't know who you're facing?

Fallen Angel - When you have the skill that I have, you don't need preperation! I'm the EWA International Champion, DAMMIT!

Rachel Stevens - This Sunday at Any Means Necessary, practically the entire EWA roster will have the chance to become the EWA Heavyweight Champion. Later tonight, the teams will be announced. Fallen Angel, will you be willing to go through everyone and anyone, including your K-Ci Klan buddy Chris Jericho to become the champion?

Fallen Angel - You're damn right I will! Chris knows his place, and he'll do what I tell him to do. And as for the rest of the EWA Roster...... Wait a minute... What roster?! There's nothing on the roster!! When this Sunday rolls around, I'll walk in with one title, and leave with two!

Rachel Stevens - Very interesting to say the least! Let's go to ringside and get this match started!

Vic Canon - Knowing the mentality of Diamante and Delsante, it could be anyone!

Eddie Sensation - Wrong! It's not just anyone! It's someone special! A former champion in the former EWA!

The Informer - Oh really? How would you know?

Eddie Sensation - I know because the bosses like me! Hey, I'm not the one working out of a little cubicle in Toronto! I've got your old office, Informer! I'm high up in this company� so I know who this guy is!

Vic Canon - Why don't you let us in on the secret then?

Eddie Sensation - No.

The Informer - Why not?

Eddie Sensation - Because.

Vic Canon - Just because?

Eddie Sensation - Yes.

The Informer - Eddie! Who is it?

Eddie Sensation - He's a former EWA North American Champion, and that's all I'm saying.

Vic Canon - Well, it's pretty obvious that we're not going to get much out of Eddie! So let's just head on up to the ring with Chris Myers and find out for ourselves!

Eddie Sensation - Perfect!

Chris Myers - This next match is scheduled for one fall and is a non-title match! Introducing first... accompanied to the ring by Cerberus, standing 6' and weighing in at 231 pounds, from Chicago, Illinois, the EWA International Champion, Fallen Angel!

["Sway" by Coal Chamber blasts through the speakers, as Cerberus and the EWA International Champion, Fallen Angel step out from behind the curtain and head towards the ring.]

The Informer - Fallen Angel has really been on a rise here in the EWA as of late!

Vic Canon - Yeah, but you've really got to wonder what's going through his mind here. It's not everyday that you're forced to wrestle a mystery opponent.

Chris Myers - And his opponent�

Eddie Sensation - Look! "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante is on the video wall!

The Informer - Good Lord! Not again!

Vic Canon - I guess we're going to find out who the mystery man is!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Now, the moment you've all been waiting for� just who is Fallen Angel's mystery opponent here tonight?

Eddie Sensation - I know! I know!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Fallen Angel, you have to understand one thing. In the 3DWA, you're always trying to be a hero. We don't condone that kind of behavior here!

The Informer - Yeah right! Figures!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Therefore, we're going to set you up against a man who isn't a role model at all. He lives, not for the fans� rather, for himself and his own personal gain!

Vic Canon - Who is it??

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - So, without further adieu� fans of the Three Dimensional Wrestling Association, please welcome back� BIG DADDY HACK!

Eddie Sensation - YEAH BABY! SEE, HE'S A FORMER EWA NORTH AMERICAN CHAMP! HACK IS BACK!

["Smoke On The Water" by Deep Purple blasts through the speakers, as Big Daddy Hack steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

The Informer - Damn! Big Daddy Hack was here in the EWA not too long ago� AND THERE HE IS!

Vic Canon - Wow! I've gotta admit, he looks in great shape! But when it comes down to it, Tom Stone isn't going to be happy with this decision!

Eddie Sensation - Hey! Hack was good enough to win the title! Tom didn't like his "work ethic" so he got rid of him. Being the good-spirited men that the 3D are, they're giving this man another chance!

The Informer - I guess I can somewhat agree with those sentiments, but bottom line� Tom won't be happy at all! He got rid of this man for a reason! Hacker is up in the ring, and he's got a mic!

Hacker - Thank you Mr. Diamante, Mr. Delsante and Mr. Deuce. You see, I am here in the 3DWA to make a fresh start and if this one Jericho can be belived, Diamentos is the Fresh maker." *pause* "Anyways, Fallen Angel. This is the 3..D..W..A and it doesn't need any One Dimensional Wrestlers like you around to cling unto the 3DWA International title. I will be taking that belt you have held hostage and I will bring it back for my people in Jamaica, East LA, Peru, Kenya and the South Pole

Vic Canon - WHOA!! FALLEN ANGEL HAS HEARD ENOUGH!! BOTH MEN COLLIDE!!

Eddie Sensation - WHAM! WHAM! YEAH! BIG HACK DADDY-O! SHOW 'EM WHY YOU DESERVE TO BE HERE!

The Informer - Hack takes control and backs Fallen Angel into the corner! KNIFE-EDGE CHOP!

Vic Canon - OUCH! DID YOU HEAR THAT?

Eddie Sensation - YEAH BABY AND IT WAS MUSIC TO MY EARS!

The Informer - Hack tosses Fallen Angel across the ring in the Irish whip! DAMN! The champ's back struck the post with full velocity!

Vic Canon - HACK COMES RUNNING IN WITH A DOUBLE AX� NO! DAMN! FALLEN ANGEL GOT THE BOOT UP RIGHT INTO THE CHIN OF BIG DADDY HACK!

Eddie Sensation - COME ON, HACK! GET UP! THIS IS YOUR CHANCE TO PROVE TO EVERYONE THAT YOU'VE GOT WHAT IT TAKES TO BE IN THIS ORGANIZATION!

The Informer - You've got to believe it's almost like a one-time trial for Hack, don't you? If he loses this match, something tells me Diamante and Delsante will send him packing just as fast as he came back!

Vic Canon - Fallen Angel is determined! He's hot and angry! Angel tosses Hack to the ropes� BACK BODY DROP! HACK LANDS RIGHT ON HIS LOWER BACK!

Eddie Sensation - NO!! STOP THIS!! HACK, GET UP!! THIS IS YOUR ONLY CHANCE!

The Informer - FALLEN ANGEL RUNS TO THE ROPES� BIG LEG DROP! ANGEL IS DEVOURING BIG DADDY HACK!

Vic Canon - ANGEL GOES FOR THE COVER! 1� 2� FOOT ON THE ROPE! FOOT ON THE ROPE BY THE BIG HACK DADDY!

Eddie Sensation - YES! YES! He's out of the ring! Good move! Good move! Buy some time, baby yeah!

The Informer - WAIT! NO!! OH MY GOD!!! FALLEN ANGEL JUST SPRUNG HIMSELF OVER THE ROPES AND TO THE OUTSIDE WITH A CROSS BODY BLOCK!!! RIGHT INTO THE CHEST OF HACK!! HACK IS DOWN!

Vic Canon - MY GOODNESS! THIS ONE IS SLOWLY BUT SURELY STEALING THE SHOW!

Eddie Sensation - Come on Hack! NO! WATCH OUT! HACK GETS UP� WATCH OUT!

The Informer - WHAM! HACK GOES DOWN TO A HUGE RUNNING CLOTHESLINE BY FALLEN ANGEL!

Vic Canon - Angel quickly slips back into the ring to break the referee's count! And back out he goes!

Eddie Sensation - He's got a hold of Hack's hair! Come on ref! Disqualify Angel!

The Informer - Oh, he's only sending him back into the ring! Calm yourself!

Vic Canon - Both men are back into the ring� AND LISTEN TO THIS OVATION FOR FALLEN ANGEL, THE EWA INTERNATIONAL CHAMPION!

Eddie Sensation - 3DWA!! 3DWA!! GET IT RIGHT! OH NO!! THE HUMANITY!!

The Informer - GOOD LORD! ANGEL SENDS BIG DADDY HACK BACK INTO THE CORNER!

Vic Canon - Angel comes running in� OH NO! HACK SPEARS FALLEN ANGEL! NOW HE ROLES HIM UP FOR THE COVER!! HEY!! HEY!! HE'S GOT BOTH HIS FEET ON THE ROPES!!! STOP HIM!!

Eddie Sensation - 1� 2� 3!!! THREE!! THREE!! HAHAHA!!! HACK WINS BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY!!

The Informer - HE CHEATED!! HE HAD HIS FEET ON THE ROPES!! REF, COME ON! YOU CAN'T TELL ME YOU DIDN'T SEE THAT!

Chris Myers - The winner of this match is Hacker!

Vic Canon - Hack slides out of the ring and he's making his way up the ramp! BUT LOOK IN THE RING! FALLEN ANGEL IS PISSED!! HE'S YELLING AT THE REF TELLING HIM WHAT HAPPENED!

Eddie Sensation - HA! But the ref can't call what he don't see! YOUR WINNER� BIG DADDY HACK, AND HE'S CERTAINLY BACK!

The Informer - Thank goodness this wasn't a title match! What a travesty that would have been!

Vic Canon - Look at Fallen Angel! He's mad! I've never seen him this over the edge in a long time!

Eddie Sensation - WHO CARES! HA! HE GOT WHAT HE DESERVED!

Eddie Sensation - Oh, get off your high horse, Informer! You know you've been waiting all week for this match!

Vic Canon - Mark it down on your calendar, I agree with Eddie. Hell, I've waited all week for this match!

The Informer - Ridiculous stipulations aside, this will be a great match to watch. This match up will be high on scientific and technical moves, counters and double counters. This should be a dandy.

"The Franchise" Chris Jericho - Well it's nothing big....many who attend Fallen Angel's bar have seen Big Pappies assets....OH MANDI! Well she is an ex-stripper and I would never lose to Del Monte anyways. He has neither the will nor the skill to defeat "The Franchise" and if your lucky one day I might just let Mandi show everyone at home her ASSests. However that SLUT Traci better have waxed her back, the last time I saw her on that nude beach you could braid all the hair on her body!

Rachel Stevens - Do you think Delsante and Diamante booked this match to humiliate you for some of the negative comments you've been making about them lately?

"The Franchise" Chris Jericho - Penguins??? No I doubt that, Nicholas and Dino are really good guys....Yeah and then you woke up rachel and wiped the cum...I mean drool from your face! HA! I'm a lot more worried about this whole Penguin and Orange thing? Aren't you?

Rachel Stevens - Finally, this Sunday is Any Means Necessary where the entire EWA will get the chance to win and advance, and eventually get the shot at Deuce's belt. The teams will be announced later on tonight... but right now, how good do you think your chances are of becoming the EWA Heavyweight Champion?

"The Franchise" Chris Jericho - Listen Russell, if I wanted to I could beat every one of the Jerky's on the EWA roster. Remember that when I save your family form those killer penguins! Now let's see Traci's back hair...I mean, OH FORGET IT! Just lock your doors and don't let your children out of the house, those damn penguins are still lose!

Rachel Stevens - Thank you Y2J, and breast of... I mean best of luck tonight! Rob DiMarco, how is "The Cornerstone" feeling about this match?

Vic Canon - Off his rocker and proud of it! But make no mistake. The Hardcore Champion can get it done.

Eddie Sensation - Bullcrap! Jericho has too many screws loose to even be in the same ring as "The Cornerstone!" Let's go backstage where Rob Di Marco has him, and the lovely Tracey Lane standing by.

"The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante - It's simple. As the owners of this federation, we decided to give something back to the fans of the 3DWA. I'll put it to you like this�if they hated us before, they're gonna love us tonight. This is the kind of match that Tom Stone is afraid to book. This is the kind of match that "Family Man" Tom Stone would never want to see. But Nick and Dino? They'll book this match all week!

Tracey Lane - Uh, no they won't!

Rob DiMarco - How can you be content in knowing that if you lose this match, your fianc�e, Tracey Lane, will have to expose herself to the world?

"The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante - What are you saying, Rob? That I can't win this match? That Jericho and his oranges, and his tomato paste, and his penguins, and his breath mints---

Tracey Lane - And his whore!

"The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante - AND his whore! You're saying that this guy, this Jagoff among Jagoffs, has a chance against "The Cornerstone?" I think you overestimate his odds! Tracey will not be naked tonight. In fact, I promise you, honey, that you won't even catch a draft.

Rob DiMarco - Tracey, you have to be a little upset about this. I mean, a few weeks ago, you did an interview and said that you wanted to see the women in this fed get their comeuppance. This can't be what you planned�is it?

Tracey Lane - Rob, I must say that while I was (shoots Dino an evil look) taken advantage of to sign this match, I have all the confidence in Dino that he will do what he says, and beat Chris Jericho. And that Whore better stay far away from me! No telling what I might catch standing next to her while she's naked!

Rob DiMarco - On a bit of a more serious note, this Sunday, it's finally time for Any Means Necessary. You've vowed in the past that the EWA Heavyweight Title will stay within the 3D family, even if you have to take it from Deuce, your own stable mate. Do you still live by those words, and how do you respond to rumors that there is tension between Deuce and The Sexy MF's?

"The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante - Do I live by my words? Hell yes. I don't ever take anything back or regret anything I say. Deuce is going to have to deal with the fact that he can no longer lead the 3D or the 3DWA. To say that he's reluctant to give it up is an understatement. But, if necessary, I will give him some "tough love" this Sunday night. I am "The Cornerstone." And there's no way I will let what Deuce, Nick and myself built crumble. Deuce will see that what I'm doing is right, in spite of himself. I will be the next 3DWA World Champion after Sunday night, and that, Rob Di Marco, is Written In 'Stone!

Rob DiMarco - Thanks a lot, Dino! Let's head to ringside for a very interesting contest. Eddie Sensation... calm your hormones!

The Informer - Now, let me straighten everyone out as far as the rules of this match. The wrestler whose valet loses all of her clothing is the loser.

Eddie Sensation - And WE'RE THE WINNERS!

The Informer - But unlike other Strip Tease Matches you might have seen, the stipulations state that anytime a wrestler hits the mat, his valet must lose an item of clothing. So, this match is bound to be over in a New York minute.

Eddie Sensation - And we'll see jublees even quicker! The new bosses are the best! Screw Tom Stone!

Vic Canon - You may live to regret that, Eddie. Anyway, this match will move at light speed, but, Informer, what do the rules say about when a wrestler drops to the mat? Do they have to strip for that?

The Informer - I think it's only when you put your opponent down to the mat�like by suplex, body slam, clothesline�the list goes on.

Eddie Sensation - No more talk! Time for boobies!

Chris Myers - This next match is a Special Strip Tease Match! Introducing first... accompanied to the ring by Tracey Lane, standing 6'3" and weighing in at 235 pounds, from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, "The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante!

["Down" by Stone Temple Pilots blasts through the speakers, as Tracey Lane and "The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante step out from behind the curtain and head towards the ring.]

Vic Canon - Boy, oh, boy, Tracey looks unbelievable up there. She's wearing a black vinyl top with matching gloves, and a very shear long skirt. Those heels�mmm, you guys�I really hope Jericho wins!

The Informer - My goodness, the hormones are going crazy here.

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, right, Informer. Looks like the table is a little higher on that end, if you know what I mean.

Chris Myers - And his opponent... accompanied to the ring by Mandi, standing 5'11" and weighing in at 230 pounds, from Calgary, Alberta, Canada, the EWA Extreme Champion, "The Franchise" Chris Jericho!

["Walls Of Jericho" blasts through the speakers, as Mandi and the EWA Extreme Champion "The Franchise" Chris Jericho step out from behind the curtain and head towards the ring.]

Eddie Sensation - YOWZA! Look at Mandi! I thought she would look a little sluttier, a little cheaper, but that looks like a Versace skirt and blouse!

Vic Canon - A Versace gown that has all the right slits and a deep neckline! Very nice!

The Informer - Let's not forget that we have a wrestling---

Eddie Sensation - SHUT UP!

The Informer - Well�looks like Tracey and Mandi are having some choice words.

Eddie Sensation - Oh, c'mon! Ring the bell! RING THE BELL!

The Informer - As if by request, the match has started. Both men are circling each other�scouting each other out. To my recollection, this is the closest these two have ever been to competing.

Vic Canon - Speaking of competition, the action is a little more intense up on the ramp. Mandi and Tracey have been throwing glances and words back and forth.

The Informer - Jericho moving in, as is Delsante. We got a lock up. Nothing doing. They're trying to get the upper hand on each other, but neither one is giving. Jericho backs Delsante up into the ropes. The referee calls for the break, and we get a clean one. There's something you don't see everyday.

Vic Canon - Dino and Jericho are so evenly matched. Neither one wants to be the one to hit the mat. We have another lock up. Dino gets Jericho into a headlock. "The Franchise" sends him into the ropes. Jericho leapfrogs Dino, Jericho misses with the clothesline, Dino comes back, and Chris goes for a hip toss. Blocked and Dino goes for one himself, and that is blocked. Jericho lets go and shoves Dino into the ropes. Dino comes back and shoves him back! A little bit of attitude here!

The Informer - You're kind of quiet, Eddie.

Eddie Sensation - I'm just waiting for the show.

The Informer - "The Cornerstone" and "The Franchise" go to lock up again, and Dino is met with a boot to the gut, which makes him double over. Jericho goes for the power bomb, Delsante won't go over. Delsante goes for the backdrop; Jericho hangs on and lands on his feet. This is crazy! Chris spins Dino around, haymaker is blocked. Right by Dino finds it's mark. Jericho falls out to the floor, and is taking a much needed breather.

Vic Canon - There's not a lot going on in this match, but it's rather exciting. I think it's the anticipation of who will lose an article of clothing.

The Informer - Very good call, Vic. Jericho heads back in. He's staying on the apron, and Dino wants at him, but the ref is keeping him back. "The Franchise" sees his opportunity and springboards in with a dropkick! Dino is down and Tracey loses a glove!

Eddie Sensation - Aw, man! Why didn't she go with the top?

Vic Canon - One can only guess.

The Informer - Jericho picks up "The Cornerstone." Scoops him up for a body slam, but Dino goes over the top, and gets Jericho in a waist lock. Jericho reverses it and goes for a German suplex, but that is blocked! Dino�WHOA! Low blow and Jericho is singing soprano! Dino gives him a short arm clothesline and Jericho hits the mat!

Eddie Sensation - Why is Mandi taking off a shoe?

Vic Canon - Oh! To throw it at Tracey!

The Informer - Remember, pin falls don't mean a thing in this match. Dino is walking toward Chris, and Jericho delivers a drop toehold. Tracey loses another glove.

Eddie Sensation - You know what's next!

Vic Canon - Both men are up. They're trading lefts and rights and are staggering, but neither are going to fall. Dino hits the ropes, and clotheslines Jericho over the top rope! That doesn't count! He has to hit the mat.

Eddie Sensation - Don't tell Mandi! She just threw that other shoe off into the crowd!

Vic Canon - Yeah, keep your mouth shut!

The Informer - Jericho is back in, Dino whips him into the ropes, and back drops�no! Jericho rolls over and goes for a sunset flip.

Eddie Sensation - I thought pin falls didn't count?

The Informer - They don't, but it would count as Jericho putting Dino down. Delsante is hanging on�he's reaching for the ropes�missed! He's down!

Vic Canon - Look at Tracey! She's pissed! She's about to lose her shirt!

Eddie Sensation - YES! YES! YES!!

The Informer - And Tracey is topless, wearing only a strapless bra! Good God Almighty!

Vic Canon - Welcome to the locker room, Informer!

Eddie Sensation - Wow, Dino is such a lucky man!

The Informer - Dino is just as pissed as Tracey! Jericho is creeping up on Dino�Oh my! Dino has Jericho in an Iron Claw! You know what's next! THE IRON CITY DROP! Jericho is out cold!

Vic Canon - Mandi is�yep, she's taking off her skirt! Look at that thong!

Eddie Sensation - Oh, momma! I'm in love!

The Informer - We have a bit of a situation here. Jericho is out cold. This could be the end of the match. The referee is talking to Dino and explaining the situation.

Eddie Sensation - Informer, for just one second, could you just look at what is standing on the ramp! The two most beautiful women we'll ever see are almost naked! NA-KED! Who really cares about what happens in the ring?

The Informer - Well, the match is continuing. Dino is trying to wake up Jericho. He pulls Jericho to his feet and�oh, no�he's setting him up on the top rope. Dino is going for a super-plex! Jericho is going for a ride�NO! He is fighting back! And he knocks Dino off! Tracey has to lose her skirt!

Eddie Sensation - Wow, look at---

The Informer - No time, Eddie! Dino is up, and dazed! Jericho is on the top rope! Jericho flies, but DINO CATCHES HIM WITH A BODY SLAM! WHOA! TAKE IT OFF, MANDI!!

Vic Canon - Both women are in their underwear, but both men are running on empty. Dino is up first. He goes to the corner�he's waiting for Jericho to get up. Jericho is in a daze�Dino goes for the super kick! Dino catches him right under the chin! Jericho is down and Mandi is---

Eddie Sensation - JUBLEES!

The Informer - Well, Mandi is trying her best to cover up. She's not as�big as Tracey, but she's no�AHEM! Back to the action in the ring, Delsante is walking toward "The Franchise" but Jericho saw it coming. DOUBLE LEG TAKE DOWN AND INTO THE WALLS OF JERICHO!

Eddie Sensation - It's the moment I've been waiting for my entire life!

Vic Canon - OH�MY�GOD! TRACEY LANE IS TOPLESS! And if I'm not mistaken, Tracey is�well, enjoying herself! She's covering herself, but she's getting the crowd into it. And now, so is Mandi! Both are trying to work this crowd, and the fans are loving it! They're teasing and shaking�it's now a popularity contest!

The Informer - Delsante reaches the ropes and the hold is broken. This crowd is going nuts! But it's not for "The Franchise" and it's not for "The Cornerstone." It's for the valets! It's for Mandi and Tracey Lane!

Eddie Sensation - I am so sure that there is not only a heaven, but there is a God there as well.

Vic Canon - What the hell? Who's going to lose this match? Someone has to lose her panties!

The Informer - Well, this is a situation. The women are entertaining the crowd here, but the men�they're having a conference in the ring. What in the hell could they be talking about?

Eddie Sensation - Who cares? Somebody better hit the deck quick though!

The Informer - Well�they�wait a minute. They're at the ropes waving to their managers, trying to get their attention. What are they doing? Tracey and Mandi are looking to the ring now. Jericho looks at Delsante and�THE BOTH HIT THE DECK! THE MATCH IS OVER! BOTH WOMEN MUST LOSE THEIR DRAWERS! THIS MATCH IS�A NO CONTEST, I GUESS!!

Eddie Sensation - WE'RE ALL WINNERS!!!

Vic Canon - Dino is rolling out of the ring. The match is over. Jericho is laughing his ass off. The women are so pissed off but they are entirely naked. Neither one of them is dancing now!

The Informer - Wait a minute. Dino has the Hardcore belt. He's back in the ring and�HE NAILS JERICHO WITH THE HARDCORE BELT! JERICHO HAS BEEN KNOCKED OUT! WE HAVE TO TAKE A BREAK! WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK!

The Hustler - Rob, the only way I can explain my unfortunate loss is that I was distracted too easily, a real dumb move. I let myself can carried away in the undertow of the intensity of the match. I was so concentrated on getting to Cody Covington, that I put the factor of the riot cops in the back of my mind, and I paid for my mistake with an addition to the loss column. I totally screwed myself, and in NO way do I think Cody Covington really beat me. It was my own fault that I lost; Cody was definitely NOT the better man that night. But, that's all last week, and I got to focus on winning tonight against C4 in this Steel Cage Match, which will surely top last week's match between us in suspense and importance, as "Any Means Necessary" quickly approaches.

Rob DiMarco - Tonight, it seems that Mr. Delsante and Mr. Diamante feel it's only fair to see you me go at it once more, this time within the confines of a 20-foot tall Steel Cage! How far will you go to exact revenge on Mr. Covington in this match?

The Hustler - As everyone knows by now, I will go farther than any man to achieve victory, whether it be within the squared circle or, in tonight's case, a steel cage. Those who have followed will know about my long history with steel cage matches, as I have been involved with many of them. Now, I'm not claiming to be the "Master of the Cage", but I've got a hell of a lot more experience wrestling inside and outside of one that Cody has. I've been powerbombed through cages, and I have powerbombed others through cages. I've had my blood stain the confines of the cage. I've sacrificed my body, I have gone all out, to take my opponent, and show him exactly why I am considered as one of the hardcore legends of the wrestling world. This match is where I think my experience will definitely play a role, as I think the self-proclaimed "Anti-Hardcore Hero" of Cody Covington, knows as well. Tonight, I'll have to widen my focus, and make sure my mind is clear, cause at any time, Diamante and Delsante could drop in with a little suprise for myself, and at the same time beat the shit out of that prick Cody Covington, whom I'm sure has a few tricks up his sleeve as well. Tonight, I'll show the same fire and strength that will give me the win and the title at Any Means Necessary, only six days away.

Rob DiMarco - Finally, Hustler... this Sunday it's time for Any Means Necessary. It will be time for your shot at the EWA Heavyweight Title... but at the same time, it will be time for the rest of the 3DWA to get their chance at the holy grail. How are you going to prepare for Any Means Necessary?

The Hustler - Well, I'm just going to keep doing what I've been doing, kicking ass, demonstrating the very superior skills I have in the ring in all types of situations, and not taking any shit from anyone that has dared to get in the face of Extremity At Its Best. My training regiment will remain the same, my confidence in my ability will remain the same, my desire for the World Heavyweight Title will ALWAYS remain the same. In essence, I've been preparing ever since I made the decision to enter the ring, the desire to be the best, and that's what that belt means. The EWA title is the "crown jewel" so to speak of all of wrestling, and what every aspiring wrestler dreams of wearing around their waist. I've been in the game for a long, long time now, and I'm finally in the position to gain the most coveted piece of gold in the EWA and wrestling in general. I will NOT let anyone get in my way of achieving this accomplishment, not some upstart like Cody Covington, not some bastard like Nick Diamante or Dino Delsante, nor any other man on the planet. What should be on everyone's mind going into this Sunday's PPV is "How do I stop The Hustler?", and that's it. You know why? Because that's just how damn determined I am, and I guaran-damn-tee, the EWA title will be on The Hustler VERY FUCKIN' SOON!

Rob DiMarco - Thank you, Hustler... and best of luck to you tonight! Let's head on over to Rachel Stevens who is standing by with "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington!

"Crystal Clear" Cody Covington - It feels great beating the Number One Contender to the World Championship Title. So.... with me beating the number one contender what would that mean? Hmmm.... I've got it! That means we have a NEW number one contender. So that's a good thing right, eee-rite! Damn I have got to quit doing that, I'm not the one who is interviewing myself.... you are, so on to the next question....

Rachel Stevens - The 3D must love watching you and The hustler go at it in the ring because they've scheduled you again to face The Hustler here tonight in a Steel Cage match! What do you feel about that decision by Delsante and Diamante?

"Crystal Clear" Cody Covington - Like I have said before, the 3D just feel threatened by us so they have decided to try and make me and The Hustler to destroy each other so there is nothing left and they can move on to get the World Strap. But don't worry about it Hustler, I'll be right here to stop them while you will be on hiatus after I beat your ass again! Well, there goes my ego again. Really, it could possible wear us both out for Any Means Necessary... worn out or not I'm going in there with only one thing on my mind and you already know what that is.....

Rachel Stevens - After tonight's event, everyone in the 3DWA will focus their attention to Any Means Necessary! What do you think your chances are of coming out on top, and finally, the EWA Heavyweight Champion?

"Crystal Clear" Cody Covington - I think my chances are rather well. Its like fifty-fifty, I don't know what I'm getting myself into, but I sure as hell know how to fight my way out of it. I'm unaware right now of who my opponents shall be, but I have a strong feeling that I can very well pull this thing off if I put my mind and physical well being into it. As far as the World Championship goes, I think I have earned it and that I very well deserve the thing, I guess we all will just and see what happens..... I'm rather anxious myself.....

Rachel Stevens - Thank you so much Mr. Covington, and best of luck to you here tonight. Let's go back to ringside!

Vic Canon - Every time I see that cage, I know it's going to be a brutal affair! A 20-foot tall steel link cage will surround the ring. The only ways to win this match is to escape the cage through the door or by climbing up and over it!

Eddie Sensation - This cage gives me chills! I think of some of the matches that have gone down within it! Hell, the last time we saw this beastly contraption was a Rage in a Cage 2� so this is actually the first Steel Cage Match of the new millennium here in the 3DWA!

The Informer - And it promises to be amazing to say the very least, because of the competitors inside it! For the second straight week, the fans of the EWA get to see "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington take on The Hustler. And to say the very least, a bit of a rivalry is beginning to develop between these men.

Vic Canon - It's only natural. Both of these men are the top 2 contenders for the EWA Heavyweight Title. The 3D has forced them to fight quite a bit over the last few weeks, so it's only natural that they begin becoming competitive among each other.

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, and with last week's loss� The Hustler isn't in the best of moods right now! Those riot cops cost him a match to Cody Covington, and those were clearly 3D cops! HA!

The Informer - There's no doubt that The Sexy MF's are picking their shots and making sure that nothing goes wrong! They've made it clear that they want the "3DWA" Heavyweight Title in the 3D, even if it means having to eliminate their own partner and current champ, Deuce� who's back injury may very well cost him his EWA career.

Vic Canon - Well, Deuce says he's going to fight at Any Means Necessary, and I'm not going to tell him he can't!

Eddie Sensation - HA! I'd like to see you try!

The Informer - Well fans, it looks like the Steel Cage is up and ready to go! We've got a match between the top two contenders for the EWA Heavyweight Title, and it should be very influential on the future of the EWA! Let's go up to Chris Myers!

Chris Myers - This next match is a Steel Cage Match! Introducing first... standing 6'4" and weighing in at 242 pounds, from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, The Hustler!

["Walk" by Pantera blasts through the speakers, as The Hustler steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

Vic Canon - The Hustler looks very determined already! He's not happy about the way he lost last week against Cody Covington, and he's come too close to becoming Heavyweight Champ to throw it all away! The Hustler isn't going to risk anything in his quest to be champion!

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, he's determined like hell� but a loss to Covington today, and sorry hunny� you're out of the race!

Chris Myers - And his opponent� standing 6'6" and weighing in at 283 pounds, from Miami, Florida, "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington!

["Lithium" by Nirvana blasts through the speakers, as "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington steps out from behind the curtain and heads towards the ring.]

The Informer - There he is! "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington! In recent weeks, Cody has climbed to the top of the EWA rankings with his great performances in the ring! This Sunday at Any Means Necessary, he and The Hustler will be 2 men among a whole lot of other guys who will be fighting to be champion!

Vic Canon - In one night a guy's dreams could come true! But they're gonna have to fight for it!

Eddie Sensation - Covington makes his way into the cage through the door� WHOA!! AND THE HUSTLER ISN'T WASTING ANY TIME HERE IN ATTACKING HIM!!

The Informer - The Hustler is focused! WHAM! WHAM!! FOREARM SMASHES!! RIGHT TO THE SKULL OF COVINGTON!

Vic Canon - Oh! But "Crystal Clear" gets his thumb right up into of The Hustler! And that sends The Hustler back a few steps clutching his eyes!

Eddie Sensation - Hey! Look! Covington isn't wasting any time either! He's starting to climb the cage behind The Hustler!

The Informer - THIS COULD BE THE SHORTEST CAGE MATCH IN EWA HISTORY!

Vic Canon - COVINGTON HAS SOME SPEED HERE! BUT THE HUSTLER FINALLY NOTICES CODY'S ATTEMPTED ESCAPE!

Eddie Sensation - Damn! The Hustler jumped straight up and grabbed Cody's ankle! AWW!! YEAH!! HAHA!! COVINGTON IS STRADDLING THE ROPES NOW!!

The Informer - That's a surefire way to stop a guy's momentum! The Hustler runs to the opposite ropes, bounces off and makes his way back� BANG! GOOD GOD!! THE HUSTLER JUST SANDWICHED COVINGTON BETWEEN HIMSELF AND THE CAGE WITH A HUGE CLOTHESLINE!

Vic Canon - Both men are awfully close to the door! They better be careful!

Eddie Sensation - THE HUSTLER MUST HAVE READ YOUR MIND, VIC! HE'S GOING OUT THE DOOR!! THIS ONE IS OVER!!!

The Informer - NO!! NO!! CODY DID EVERYTHING HE COULD OUT OF DESPERATION TO LUNGE FOR THE HUSTLER'S LEG! He seems to have him in control!

Vic Canon - The Hustler is still hanging halfway out the cage! Cody better pull him inside! WAIT! THE HUSTLER JUST MULE-KICKED HIMSELF LOOSE!! HE'S GOING TO WIN THIS THING!!

Eddie Sensation - NO!! OH DAMN!! CODY CAUGHT THE HUSTLER'S LEG, AND THIS TIME HE'S PULLING HIM BACK INTO THE CAGE! Damn! I bet Cody's heart skipped a beat there!

The Informer - In the center of the ring, Cody is working on The Hustler's leg now! Knee to knee! Wham! You know, that's the way these matches are, Eddie. They can end so quickly that the wrestlers inside the cage have to be paranoid!

Vic Canon - "Crystal Clear" is looking to slow down this match a bit and work on The Hustler's leg!

Eddie Sensation - Hey man! It ain't a bad move! The Hustler won't be climbing out no cages on a bad wheel!

The Informer - Cody is working on The Hustler's knee and leg with a Terry Funk-like spinning toe hold! And you can hear from the Hustler's screaming that it doesn't feel too good at all!

Vic Canon - The momentum on the hold breaks, and Cody's going for another spin around in the big move.

Eddie Sensation - At this pace, The Hustler's set to lose another one! And that can't help his title run!

The Informer - OH MY GOODNESS!! WITH HIS FREE LEG, THE HUSTLER JUST SHOVED COVINGTON RIGHT OFF OF HIM! AND "CRYSTAL CLEAR" WENT RIGHT INTO THE CAGE WITH THE BACK OF HIS HEAD HITTING FIRST!

Vic Canon - Damn! The Hustler is up and he seems to be ignoring all his pain! This guy really is a freak! "Extremity At It's Best" sure as hell explains the mentality of this guy!

Eddie Sensation - HEY! HAHA! LOOK! THE HUSTLER IS LOCKING COVINGTON IN THE ROPES!! DAMN, HUSTLER� GO FOR THE CAGE DOOR! No! What are you doing??

The Informer - He's choking out Cody with both of his hands! He's too fired up to think about escaping the cage right now!

Vic Canon - I bet you every time he sees Covington he's reminded of his loss to him last week! Those riot cops had a big influence on the end of the match, and that can't make him happy!

Eddie Sensation - The Hustler is backing into the opposite ropes� WAIT! CODY HAS FREED HIMSELF!! THE HUSTLER IS RUNNING AT CODY� OH MY LORD IN HEAVEN!! CODY COVINGTON JUST BACK BODY DROPPED THE HUSTLER BETWEEN THE CAGE AND THE ROPES! DAMN MAN! LOOK AT HOW HE'S BENT! THAT'S NOT HUMAN!!

The Informer - I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT MOVE!! COVINGTON IS DOWN AND THE HUSTLER LOOKS TO BE LODGED SOMEWHAT FIRMLY BETWEEN THE CAGE AND THE ROPES!

Vic Canon - Can you imagine the pain that is blasting through The Hustler's body right now? He's just beginning to move� OUCH! But not before he's met by some solid kicks by the "Crystal Clear" one!

Eddie Sensation - Covington has The Hustler by the hair, and he looks to have evil intentions in his mind as he brings The Hustler to his feet!

The Informer - Uh oh! It looks like he's going to run The Hustler into the cage face first!! CODY HAS A GRIP IF THE HUSTLER'S HAIR� WHAM!! THE HUSTLER IS SENT FACE FIRST INTO THE CAGE!!

Vic Canon - MY GOD!! DID YOU HEAR THAT?? THAT WAS THE HUSTLER'S FACE BEING SLAMMED INTO THE STEEL, AND� OH GOD!! LOOK AT THIS!! CODY COVINGTON IS JUST� HE'S FORCEFULLY GRINDING THE HUSTLER'S FACE INTO THE CAGE!!

Eddie Sensation - COVINGTON IS AN ANIMAL TONIGHT! He knows that another win against The Hustler will make no bones about the fact that he's the undisputed number one contender to the EWA's throne!

The Informer - Cody leaves The Hustler to lay on the mat like a wounded animal on the highway, and it looks like he's going for the win here! Cody Covington is climbing the cage! And The Hustler isn't moving!

Vic Canon - It looks like Covington is just moments away from making a huge leap in his career! Cody, though physically tired and hurt, is climbing that cage as fast as he can!

Eddie Sensation - The Hustler really is out cold! His arm is moving a bit, but that's about it! He's laying on his back almost fully motionless as he stares at the arena's lights!

The Informer - Hey! Cody just turned around! He's almost at the top of the cage, and he just noticed that The Hustler isn't moving!

Vic Canon - What's he doing here?? Cody Covington is turning around? Huh?

Eddie Sensation - DON'T TELL ME HE'S GONNA JUMP ON THE HUSTLER!?

The Informer - I THINK THAT IS IT! GOOD LORD!! THAT'S 20 FEET IN THE AIR!! WHY IS HE EVEN CONSIDERING THIS MOVE??

Vic Canon - IF I WERE HIM, I'D GET MY WIN BEFORE I WORRIED ABOUT HURTING THE HUSTLER!!

Eddie Sensation - "CRYSTAL CLEAR" CODY COVINGTON IS SITTING ON THE TOP OF THE CAGE IN THE CORNER, AND HE'S STANDING UP!!

The Informer - THIS IS GOING TO BE INSANE!! LOOK AT THE FLASHBULBS GOING OFF IN THIS ARENA!! COVINGTON IS GOING TO DO IT!! CODY COVINGTON LEAPS FROM THE CAGE!! FULL BODY SPLASH�����

Vic Canon - ����HE HIT IT!! CODY COVINGTON HIT THE FULL�

Eddie Sensation - NO!! WHAT ARE YOU SAYING!! THE HUSTLER GOT HIS KNEES UP!! THE HUSTLER BLOCKED THE ATTEMPTED 20 FOOT SPLASH BY LIFTING BOTH HIS KNEES!!

The Informer - I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!! LISTEN TO THIS CROWD!! THEY'RE EATING IT UP!! CODY COVINGTON IS ROLLING AROUND IN PAIN CLUTCHING HIS RIBS WITH HIS ARMS TRYING TO SUPPORT HIMSELF!! THE HUSTLER IS HOLDING ON TO THAT BAD WHEEL!! BOTH MEN ARE SERIOUSLY INJURED!! BUT CODY IS ACTUALLY MAKING AN ATTEMPT TO GET UP AND CLIMB THE CAGE AGAIN!!

Vic Canon - HOW CAN CODY EVEN HAVE THE STRENGTH???

Eddie Sensation - HIS RIBS MUST BE KILLING HIM!! I'M SORRY GUYS, BUT IF HE MANAGES TO GET UP AND STILL WIN THIS MATCH, THIS GUY DESERVES A TITLE SHOT!!

The Informer - THE HUSTLER IS ROLLING AROUND ON THE MAT SCREAMING!! HE'S GOT A HOLD OF THAT RIGHT KNEE!! This could be a very serious and untimely injury for The Hustler!

Vic Canon - Cody is back on his feet! He better not delay and start climbing that cage!

Eddie Sensation - That's exactly what he's doing! Covington starts to climb the cage� actually, the ropes� right in the corner of this cage! He's on the middle ropes!

The Informer - We've been discussing how this match was made by the 3D in a way to eliminate 2 of their biggest threats, but this match has honestly been worth everything! What a great match!

Vic Canon - The Sexy MF's should be given some credit for the success of the last 2 week, that's for sure! But back to the match� Covington is more than halfway up the cage! He's almost at the top!

Eddie Sensation - The Hustler is making it to his feet! NO! OH CRAP! HE JUST COLLAPSED!! THE HUSTLER TRIED TO PUT TO WEIGHT ON THAT KNEE, AND HE JUST COLLAPSED!!

The Informer - IT'S ACADEMIC NOW!! "CRYSTAL CLEAR" CODY COVINGTON IS ON TOP OF THE CAGE!! HE'S GOT A LEG OVER AND OUT!! CODY COVINGTON IS GOING TO WIN THIS MATCH!!

Vic Canon - THE HUSTLER IS IN PAIN!! THIS IS HIS LAST REAL CHANCE!!

Eddie Sensation - COVINGTON HAS BOTH LEGS OVER!! HE'S GOT A 20 FOOT CLIMB BLOW HIM!! AND THE HUSTLER IS TRYING TO GET UP!! WAIT� WHAT THE HELL??

The Informer - THE HUSTLER IS UP!! HE'S� HE'S� OH MY GOD!! HE'S SPRINTING TO THE CAGE DOOR!! THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH HIS LEG!!

Vic Canon - THE HUSTLER DIVES INTO THE DOOR� IT'S OPEN!! IT'S OPEN� AND!! AND� HE'S OUT!!! HE'S OUT!!! GOOD LORD!!! THE HUSTLER IS OUT OF THE CAGE AND HE'S WON THIS MATCH!!

Eddie Sensation - HE WAS FAKING IT!! HE WAS OVER-EXAGGERATING THE KNEE INJURY!! AND HE FOOLED CODY COVINGTON!! LISTEN TO THIS CROWD!! DAMN!! HOT DAMN!!

Chris Myers - The winner of this match is The Hustler!

The Informer - THE HUSTLER USED SOME REAL GOOD MENTAL STRATEGY TO EARN A WIN IN THIS MATCH! DAMN! AND LOOK AT CODY COVINGTON!! HE'S NOT HAPPY AT ALL!!

Vic Canon - I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT JUST HAPPENED! Guys! I really thought the Hustler had suffered a possible career-threatening injury!

Eddie Sensation - Hell no! The guy used his brains and I gotta give him all the credit in the world! What a match!

The Informer - HEY! CODY COVINGTON IS MAKING HIS WAY AROUND THE CAGE TO WHERE THE HUSTLER IS� HE'S GONNA ATTACK THE HUSTLER!!

Vic Canon - OH GOD!! SOMEBODY HAS TO STOP HIM�

Eddie Sensation - NO!! WHOA!! THE HUSTLER SAW IT COMING!! THESE MEN ARE TRADING FISTS LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORROW!! WHAM!! WHAM!! WHAM!! YEAH BABY!! YA GOTTA LOVE PRO WRESTLING!!

The Informer - THESE MEN HAVE SPENT THE LAST 10 MINUTES TEARING EACH OTHER APART INSIDE THE CAGE AND NOW THEY'RE CONTINUING THE JOB ON THE OUTSIDE!!

Vic Canon - YOU'VE GOT TO BELIEVE THAT "THE CORNERSTONE" DINO DELSANTE AND "THE DIAMOND STUD" NICK DIAMANTE ARE LOVING THIS BACK STAGE!!

Eddie Sensation - NO DOUBT ABOUT IT!! OFFICIALS ARE SWARMING THIS PLACE!! AND THEY'RE TRYING TO BREAK THESE GUYS UP!!

The Informer - FANS, WE'VE GOT TO TAKE A COMMERCIAL BREAK!! IF ANYTHING SIGNIFICANT HAPPENS DURING THE BREAK, WE'LL HAVE IT FOR YA! DON'T GO ANYWHERE, 3DWA HEAT WILL BE RIGHT BACK!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - For the record, Ms. Stevens, Dino and I run this company and we're running it with pride, guts and glory... and if I hear anyone refer to this place as the "EWA" one more time, I'm going to be forced to slap the taste right out of their mouths... and that goes for you too, honey.

Rachel Stevens - I'm... I'm sorry about that, Mr. Diamante.

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Whatever... it doesn't really matter. What does matter, Ms. Stevens, is that the 3 Dimensions of Wrestling leave their mark on professional wrestling during our reign of terror. You know, in this sport, you've always got your "good guys" and your "bad guys". There's always someone claiming to be the best of the best, when in actuality, they're not worth a damn! Look at The Syndicate! They tried to be the heroes around here by attempting to stop the fed-raping beast known as the 3D! They're failing terribly! Dino and I finished the job on Extreme Velocity last week, and now we've got 2 pieces of gold around our waists that ain't goin' anywhere anytime soon! I'M DAMN PISSED OFF... And quite frankly, I'm sick and tired of people thinking that the 3D isn't going anywhere without Bigg Daddy Deuce. Not for nothing, and no offence intended, but it was Dino and I that brought on this entire 3DWA story. WE TOOK OVER THIS BUSINESS... and from now on, we're going to get the credit we deserve... even if we've gotta kill somebody to do it!

Rachel Stevens - Nick... what about Zed?

[Nick pauses and looks at Rachel with a very angry look...]

"The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante - Rachel, you seem to be the one who wants to push the journalistic envelope here. Well, the same goes for "The Stud" in the wrestling ring. Everyone wants to know why we, the heads of this outfit, gave Zed a fourth chance. It's easy. Deuce beat Zed. I beat Zed. The one member of the 3D that hasn't faced this loser in the ring? "The Diamond Stud." And with today being his birthday, Nick decided this was the present he was going to give himself. But don't think he's been taking this match lightly. No way. Last week was the first step in getting back the respect we, the Three Dimensions of Wrestling, had when we first "possied up." Winning the Tag Titles was the statement. This week, we put the exclamation point on the mother! This week, we instill fear!

Rachel Stevens - "Cornerstone"... why is it that you men felt it was necessary to have you as an official for this match?

"The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante - You think I'm going to miss this match? No way sister! Where one half of the 3DWA World Tag Team Champions go, so goes his partner. And don't give me that look.

Rachel Stevens - What look?

"The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante - That "oh, he's going to call the match in favor of Nick." B.S., Rachel. I'm going to call it down the middle. And if I was going to call it in anyone's favor, it'd be my own.

Rachel Stevens - "Diamond Stud", if I can ask you one more question before you head to ringside...

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - No! Enough! I've got something to say! I've been here in the... Extreme Wrestling Association for a long time now, be it behind the scenes, as a manager, or as a wrestler. I've seen a lot of posers enter this organization claiming to be the best thing to this world since a bag of smooth green on a Friday night! What Delsante and I represent is wrestling! Pro wrestling, and the domination of it! TONIGHT, right here on Tuesday Night Heat, the process begins! We will, The 3 Dimensions of Wrestling, take what we deserve in full, and not a dime less. Zed, you have a calling in life. And tonight, you, along with the rest of the world, will find out what it is! And sometimes, Rachel... the truth can hurt. It can hurt real bad. So bad, it can send chills up your spine! Zed... show me you have a spine. Show the world... YOU HAVE A SPINE! Tonight, Zed... I WANNA SEE YOU SMILE!

Rachel Stevens - Thank... thank you gentlemen. Let's go to... over to Rob DiMarco who is standing by with Zed.

Zed - My thoughts? I have several to be honest with you. I had never expected Nick and Dino to grant me a chance to regain my EWA contract. I thought about the whole idea for a while, and came to the conclusion that they're only doing all this for their personal amusement. It's all just a game to them, and tomarrow night, I'm going to be one of the major players of this game. The odds may be once again out of my favor, but I'm still going to give it my all. I've always wanted to wrestle Nicky D, and tomarrow night I'm going to get a chance to bring him down. Dino's presence may be looming, but this is probably as good as it's going to get with these guys. Therefore, I'm going to make sure I don't blow it.

Rob DiMarco - With "The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante as referee, how good do you think your chances will be at regaining your contract with this company?

Zed - Well, like I said before, his presence is going to be looming like a group of stratus clouds. So I'm sure he's going to do everything in his power to make sure his buddy Nick doesn't lose. However, I'd like to think that over the years I've reached a level where I can handle these kinds of odds. So despite the fact Dino will be around, I think I have a fair chance at regaining my contract.

Rob DiMarco - Finally Zed... should you lose this match, where would you go from here? I mean, the EWA hasn't exactly treated you like you belong... and at this moment, you don't actually work for this company. If everything fails, what does the future hold for Zed, and will you have a home anywhere else?

Zed - Don't you worry Rob. By the end of tonight, I'll have a home sure enough.

Rob DiMarco - Zed, best of luck to you here tonight. It's do or die time gentlemen! Informer, take it away at ringside!

The Informer - Thanks, Rob! Well guys, it really is do or die time for Zed! As it stands for him, this is his final chance! If Tom Stone were around, I'd have to believe he'd be more upset with The Sexy MF's granting Zed a second chance than the fact that they've turned this place upside down and made a mockery out of it.

Vic Canon - I kind of have to agree with you on that one, Informer. As much as this whole situation with the 3DWA will upset Tom, you know he hates Zed with a passion, and the very thought of him returning to the EWA would drive him nuts!

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, and watching Tom go insane might be the perfect cure! When it comes down to it, he really should thank Dino and Nicky D for taking such great care of this place� as well as bringing some class FINALLY to those 3DWA Tag Team belts!

The Informer - What about everything else they've done, huh? The cancellation of the Spoiler� the signings of preliminary wrestlers� the "Strip Tease" matches!

Eddie Sensation - Hey, if you're complaining about that match, then don't sit too close to me! And you forgot to mention the signings of such great talents as Big Daddy Hack and Brett Bomb!

Vic Canon - There's no doubt that this situation hasn't been a total loss, and it has made for some entertaining television.

Eddie Sensation - Whoa! We've got company! It looks like Zed should have a fun time trying to win back his contract here tonight! HA!

The Informer - OH, COME ON! Can't these guys do anything fairly? The entire 3D, minus Bigg Daddy Deuce is down here! And who's going to stop them? Nobody! Because they're in control!

Vic Canon - If you're a fan of traditional wrestling, then you've got to hate the 3D! They do nothing by the book and constantly make up the rules as they go along! Seriously, what has Zed done to deserve this? Or is this just the 3D's way of showing that they can do whatever they want, whenever they want?

Eddie Sensation - Hey, I'm not a Zed-Offender or anything, but he has gone on for weeks and weeks over how he's so much better than Deuce! Delsante, Diamante and Deuce are a combo of guys who are great friends! When a guy disses your friend, you stick up for him!

The Informer - Yeah, but not to the point where you've gotta drive him out of a job!

Vic Canon - Though there are plenty of places Zed can work, you know he wants to stay in the Extreme Wrestling Association! Hey, I don't blame him! We're the only place that's really time-tested and true these days. The best of the best compete here, and it will stay like that as long as Tom is in charge!

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, enough with the sentimental comments already! The 3D is in the ring and it looks like they've got something to say!

The Informer - Oh joy!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - The world has been waiting for it for a few weeks now� and now, it's time to deliver! It's time to announce the wildcard teams for Any Means Necessary! And here on my birthday, it's time for me to give a gift to you!

Vic Canon - Alright! I totally forgot about that!

Eddie Sensation - Ha! "Wildcard" teams, huh? Something tells me that these teams are going to be rigged in a fashion that will make the 3D's road to retaining the title so much easier!

"The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante - "The Diamond Stud" and I were in the locker room about five minutes ago. And we just drew names of the wrestlers that will compete on the Wildcard teams this Sunday at "Any Means Necessary." If I was a fan sitting in this arena right now, and at home watching on TV, I'd get down on my knees and thank the good Lord in heaven that the two of us are in control!!

The Informer - Don't seem to be many folks here that are appreciative.

Vic Canon - There's two more where they came from.

"The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante - You all know the drill! Teams will compete in elimination style with the survivors advancing to the final match where the 3DWA Heavyweight Title will be on the online! So, without further adieu, let's announce some teams here!

The Informer - Yes! This should be interesting if the 3D actually did keep things clean!

Vic Canon - That's right! Any Means Necessary is another new and unique event brought to you by the Extreme Wrestling Association!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Everyone already knows that The 3 Dimensions of Wrestling will square off against The Syndicate in a match that will teach The Syndicate that 3D ain't their lucky number! Who will be our fourth member? Ah, who knows� we'll figure it out! But now, allow me to announce the teams for the second of 3 matches!

Eddie Sensation - YEAH BABY! THIS SHOULD BE GREAT!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - On Sunday, March 26th, the team of The Wildman, "Crystal Clear" Cody Covington, Aaron Shurr and Big Enzo will join forces for the first time anywhere! And they're opponents will be the team comprised of Brett Bomb, Rocky Blonde, Brandon Casten and Leroy!

The Informer - WOW! WHAT A MATCH! This truly will be a wild match!

Vic Canon - You can say that again!

Eddie Sensation - Hey, Leroy doesn't look too happy in there knowing he's going to have to face his own stablemate, Enzo! Nick's bodyguard against Dino's. Hell, that shows you right there that they didn't rig this thing!

"The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante - In another of our Elimination Style matches, the team of�(looks at card) Good God�Sorry folks, this will be a "snore fest." Y2C, Big Pappy, Ian Casten and the greatest ring announcer ever, Elroy Johnson will take on the team of�YAWN�Chris Jericho, Fallen Angel, Nuno Nitrowalawitz and a mystery partner. Of course, the mystery partner is the only reason to watch this match. I'll let you all in on a little secret�it isn't G.I. Bro!

The Informer - A MYSTERY PARTNER? WHO COULD IT BE??

Vic Canon - I have no clue! This event is shaping up to be full of surprises! "Any Means Necessary" is going to be insane!

Eddie Sensation - Jericho and Angel lucked out! They're on the same team!

The Informer - It's too bad that Zed won't be able to be part of this event, win lose or draw tonight.

Vic Canon - Hey, you never know! We don't know who that mystery opponent is!

Eddie Sensation - Yeah, but I really doubt it's going to be Zed of all people!

The Informer - True, true.

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Now that business is over and done with, it's time for a little action. Zed, you be a man and get your ass out here. For months and months, you've been brave enough to use my name and drag it through the mud, huh? A real, real tough guy! Well, I've got some news for ya! You're just not good enough to wrestle "The Diamond Stud" when everything is on the line! YOU WANNA BE A BIG MAN!? YOU WANNA MESS WITH NICK DIAMANTE?! WELL HERE'S YOUR CHANCE HOTSHOT!! IF YOU DON'T BEAT ME RIGHT NOW, YOU'RE NOT WORTHY OF WRESTLING IN THE SAME COMPANY THE ONE I'M IN! IT'S PUT UP OR SHUT UP TIME, BUDDY AND I AIN'T RUNNING AWAY! COME ON OUT HERE AND REVEL IN THE MOMENT THAT WILL LAST IN YOUR MIND� Forever!

Vic Canon - My God! This match is going to chance the course of the EWA's future!

Eddie Sensation - Never before have these guys ever wrestled, anywhere! Not in any other fed� not on any super card! But the hatred between these guys is totally documented and legitimate!

The Informer - Listen to these boos and Nick stands on the second rope! "The Diamond Stud" is in a very serious mood tonight! He's usually more of a joker, but tonight he's all business!

Vic Canon - I can't blame him either! This is a huge event! In one match, he can single-handedly destroy Zed's EWA career and ruin his life! Not to mention garner some bragging rights!

Eddie Sensation - Hey, don't forget "The Cornerstone" Dino Delsante's duties here in this match! He's the ref� the law, order and justice in this ring! Nothing will get past him!

Chris Myers - And his opponent� accompanied to the ring by Santoro, standing 6'5" and weighing in at 270 pounds, from Chicago, Illinois, Zed!

["Personal Jesus" by Depeche Mode blasts through the speakers, as Santoro and Zed step out from behind the curtain and head towards the ring.]

The Informer - THERE HE IS! And my goodness, I must say� he's coming out here to a pretty generous crowd reaction! This man is normally hated! But I think the fans can understand what this man has gone through over the last few months! He's slowly but surely becoming a cult hero in the EWA!

Vic Canon - Zed looks focused guys! More focused than normal! He's got a very tall task ahead of him! Getting back into the EWA by defeating "The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante with "The Cornerstone" as the ref is not easy task!

Eddie Sensation - Zed is getting into the ring, and he looks none too happy! Damn, this really is gonna be a war!

The Informer - We're running out of time here, but we're told we've got a few more minutes of overtime we're allowed to use.

Vic Canon - Zed is in the ring and we've got a stare-down going down between both men!

Eddie Sensation - MAN!! CAN YOU FEEL THE ELECTRICITY IN THIS MATCH?? THE CROWD IS PUMPED UP!!

The Informer - This is strange! Zed and Diamante aren't exchanging words here! Just dirty looks and a lot of breath!

Vic Canon - You've gotta believe this one is going to explode any second now!

Eddie Sensation - JESUS! DAMN! LISTEN TO THESE FANS STOMPING THE FLOOR ALREADY! THIS PLACE IS LOUD! Whoa! Where's Nick going??

The Informer - He's walking over� he wants something� he's asking for something here.

Vic Canon - A microphone? Chris Myers is handing "The Diamond Stud" a microphone here! What's going on??

Eddie Sensation - I don't know, but be quiet and we'll hear!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - This on?

The Informer - Sounds like it to me!

"The Diamond Stud" Nick Diamante - Hey Zed. Do me a favor� let me see ya smile.

Vic Canon - Smile? Why would he want to see him smile?

Eddie Sensation - HE'S PROBABLY GONNA KICK HIM IN THE TEETH! HA!

The Informer - Zed is smiling� I� huh? What's going on.

Vic Canon - THERE'S HATRED IN THIS RING TONIGHT!

Eddie Sensation - UHH� why is Zed smiling?

The Informer - Diamante just fell to the canvas! What the hell??

Vic Canon - Zed is looking at referee Dino Delsante right in the eye!

Eddie Sensation - THERE'S THAT SMILE AGAIN! WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE??

The Informer - I� NO, DON'T TELL ME�

Vic Canon - ZED HAS DROPPED TO HIS KNEES! ZED IS COVERING NICK DIAMANTE!!!

Eddie Sensation - NO!! WHAT?? DELSANTE IS GOING FOR THE COVER!

The Informer - 1��� 2��� 3!!! ZED HAS PINNED NICK DIAMANTE! WHAT IS GOING ON HERE??

Vic Canon - THIS CROWD IS STUNNED!! AS SO ARE WE!!

Chris Myers - The winner of this match, and now back in the 3DWA��� Zed!

Eddie Sensation - DIAMANTE IS UP! HE DOESN'T LOOK ALL THAT HAPPY!!

The Informer - WAIT� A SMILE?? NICK IS SMILING� SO IS DINO!?

Vic Canon - ZED IS BACK IN THE EWA, BUT AT WHAT COST AND IN WHAT CAPACITY??

Eddie Sensation - THEY'RE RAISING THEIR HANDS� THE 3D HAND SYMBOL!! OH MY GOD!! ZED IS FLASHING THE 3D SYMBOL!! HE'S IN THE 3 DIMENSIONS OF WRESTLING??

["Rock is Dead" by Marylin Manson begins to blast through the sold out arena�]

The Informer - THE REST OF THE 3D IS GETTING IN THE RING HERE!!

Vic Canon - DINO DELSANTE IS HANDING ZED A SHIRT! IT'S OFFICIAL?? IT'S A 3D T-SHIRT!?

Eddie Sensation - HAHAHA!! YEAH BABY!! IT'S OFFICIAL!!! ZED HAS JOINED THE 3 DIMENSIONS OF WRESTLING!! HAHAHA!! UP YOURS STONE!! YOU JUST GOT ROYALLY F*CKED OVER BY A BUNCH OF GENIUSES!! ZED IS IN THE 3D!!

The Informer - I GUESS WE KNOW WHO THE 3D'S FOURTH PARTNER IS FOR ANY MEANS NECESSARY! DAMNIT, WHY HAS ZED DONE THIS??

Vic Canon - I THOUGHT ZED AND DEUCE HATED EACH OTHER?? HOW DOES DEUCE STAND WITH THIS DECISION?!

Eddie Sensation - YOU DON'T THINK THEY DOUBLE-CROSSED DEUCE, DO YOU?? DEUCE AND ZED COULD NEVER GET ALONG!!

The Informer - FANS, ALL WE KNOW IS THAT ZED HAS APPARENTLY JOINED THE 3 DIMENSIONS OF WRESTLING! BUT WE'RE OUT OF TIME! FOR EDDIE SENSATION AND VIC CANON� THIS IS THE INFORMER SAYING� WHY ZED?? WHY??