The Informer - Finally, they carry him out of the ring by his feet. They're dragging him somewhere... looks like they are outside!! Oh no!! They've got him in the middle the street in front of the arena!! They've left the battered and bruised corpse of Death Row in the middle of a street!!

[No Contest in 12 minutes and 9 seconds.]

Johnny Bones - This match has been ruled a No Contest!!

The Informer - Castor is out!! Warrior goes for the cover.... 1... 2......

[Blackout.]

Tom Stone - What the hell?? All you can see... or hear is some shuffling around!! Oh shit!! It just sounded like someone fell to the mat like a sac of potatoes!! Here come the lights... Warrior is down, Castor Troy is on top of him... Mike Hunter counts... 1... 2.... 3!!! [Castor "The Main Event" Troy won the match in 23 minutes and 34 seconds.]

Johnny Bones - Here is your winner, Castor "The Main Event" Troy!!

The Informer - I think we have a upclose picture... Lets try to make it out... It looks like Castor is in the corner, and someone comes in the ring... WHAM!! Fist to the jaw! Warrior goes down... the person leaves and Castor gets the pin...

Tom Stone - I think we have the mystery man... to the tape!! THAT POLLUX TROY!! He's hiding under the ring!!

The Informer - Now there's a hole in the cell!! Trinidy is distracting the ref!! HERE COMES DANGER INC!! The three are beating the hell out of both men with baseball bats!!! Get them out of there!! What the hell?? They just pulled X-Treme over DMX!! The ref counts... 1... 2.... 3!!!

[X-Treme won the match in 33 minutes and 17 seconds.]

Johnny Bones - Here is your winner, X-Treme!!

Tom Stone - Danger Inc are back in the ring... They're helping X-Treme up to his feet!! Blitz just handed X-Treme a "Danger INC 99" T-Shirt!! Now they covered DMX with a shirt also... Blitz has a mic...

Blitzkreig - DMX, if you aren't with us you are against us. X-Treme, welcome to the family.

The Informer - The Wildman throws The Brink into the corner... The Brink hits the tournbuckle... Wildman comes charging in... The Brink moves... Wildman jumps--WILDMAN GOES HEAD FIRST INTO THE CAGE!! His body falls to the mat!! The Brink sets him up in the corner... THE DOWNWARD PLUNGE!!!!! Mike Hunter counts... 1.... 2... 3!!!!

[The Brink won the match in 29 minutes and 41 seconds.]

Johnny Bones - Here is your winner, The EWA International Champion, The Brink!!

Tom Stone - Absolutely, this match has to be the most exciting match we have seen in weeks. Both of these men are down and out. There has been no movement up there on that scaffold for quite a while now.

The Informer - Well, no shit man, Chandler took both Deuce and Himself out with that roll of barbed wire around 10 minutes ago.

[A replay is shown of Chandler wrapping barbed-wire around his leg and hitting a guillotine legdrop off the top of the steel ladder that leads up to the scallfold from about 7 feet down below on to Deuce who was laid out on that skyscraping piece of metal the two have been fighting on]

The Informer - We�re back to live action now, and Deuce appears to be moving. Let me remind the fans once again that in this type of matchup there is no 10-count rule in effect.

Tom Stone - Yes, Deuce is up!!! Oh my god Informer, his face is crimson... everywhere!!! He falls down on top of Chandler... 1... 2... Noooo!!

The Informer - NO!!! Chandler kicked out at the last second. Deuce can�t believe. Whoa!! Hello, kick right in the nads by Chandler, that one will keep him safe for awhile.

Tom Stone - Chandler back to his feet now... he�s just as bloody, if not bloodier, than Deuce is. Fans, this is what the EWA is all about, two wrestlers giving it their all to please the fans. Chandler picks Deuce up by the hair, hooks him, BIG vertical suplex onto that steel scaffold. Cover.... 1... 2... NOOO!!

The Informer - NO, NO Deuce kicked out... he kicked out. Chandler looks like he is amazed by what we have all just seen. He picks Deuce back up by the hair once again... sets him up for something... what the hell could this be? Powerbo... NO, Deuce with a hurricannrana... 1..... 2.... thr....NO!!

Tom Stone - NO!!!! That time Chandler was the one with the amazing kickout. Back men up to their feet and they lock up... attempted belly to belly by Chandler... Deuce goes behind and sets him up for a german suplex, no, Chandler rolls back around and is looking for a northern lights bomb, NO, Duece reverses that!!! He�s going for a vertical suplex, NO!!! Chandler goes behind, dragon suplex attempted... BLOCKED!!! Deuce going for a DDT, that�s Chandler own move... THAT�S BLOCKED TOO!!! Chandler kicks him in the gut.... and..... BIG TIMER!!!!! CHANDLER HITS THE BIG TIMER ON DEUCE.... he falls on top..... 1...... 2...... 3!!!!

The Informer - It�s over!!! Tom, I think you�ll agree, that has got to be the most amazing series of manuvers and reverses we have ever seen.

Tom Stone - Absolutely.

[Chandler won the match in 58 minutes and 32 seconds.]

Johnny Bones - Here is your winner, Chandler!!

Tom Stone - I hear that.

[Right as Rick Ramos is about to suplex TNT, the lights in the arena are completely shut off. One lone spotlight shines on the entranceway as "BULLS ON PARADE" begins to play over the PA and huge blacklight pyro bombs go off]

The Informer - Ah damnit. No, not again. I swear to god, one day Chandler is going to get his, and I hope to god it's at the PPV. I HATE THAT FUCKING PUNK!!!

[As all six men in the ring stop what they are doing and look towards the ailse, the feeling inside the arena is one of a hushed anticipation. The fans know something big is about to happen. But there's no Chandler. The music has been playing for over 2 minutes, but he has not showed up. The fans begin to get suspicious that something is up. How right they are. Behind the other 6 men in the ring, Chandler cuts his way through the bottom of the ring with a bigass Ginsu knife. His face has crusted red blood all over it, he looks like he has been in a trainwreck. The other wrestlers in the ring don't even notice him. Realizing this, Chandler reaches down under the ring and pulls something out. Oh my god fans, it's a flamethrower. Chandler has a flamethrower. He pats Damian on the back and all 6 men turn around. I hope you brought your weiners and marshmallows because we have a fire on our hands. The 6 men quickly leave the ring and go backstage. Chandler cuts off the flamethrower, reaches over the ropes to Johnny Bones, and grabs his mic]

Chandler - Ok, enough with Bob Barker, K-Mart, and Duane Gill, it's time to get down to business. Thrylla, Nomad, it's finally here. This Sunday boys, us 3 battle it out for the right to be crowned heavyweight champion of the world, but more importantly, we are fighting for the right to say that we are the best wrestler ever to step foot in the EWA. Who will it be? I'm not a betting man, and hell, that's just cause it's illegal for 16 year olds to bet, but if i was a betting man I would have to put the money on yours truely. Thrylla is an old washed up geezer who can't cut it anymore. Nomad is a fucking yankee goth with no real wrestling ability. But you see, Clayton Chandler, and yes, I say my real name because this is some serious shit, anyway, Clayton Chandler is not old and washed up like our Techno DJ friend and certainly has more ability than Nomad... ask Duece. So this Sunday I will come out on top, GUARANTEED. Put that in your pipe and smoke it. I'm out, later.

[BULLS ON PARADE starts back up as Chandler leaves the arena through the fans, with a decible piercing "NEXT F'N CHAMP" chant following him to the door]

[No Contest in 47 minutes and 56 seconds.]

Johnny Bones - This match has been ruled a No Contest!!

The Informer - Serial Thrylla gets into the ring... Italian Stallion is waiting there... He charges with a clothesline, Thrylla ducks... kicks him in the gut, and nails him with a suplex... No!! Serial Thrylla sets him up on the top rope... No... On the top of the cage!! DFA OFF THE TOP OF THE CAGE!!! What the hell is this?? Serial Thrylla is signalling to Tom Stone!!

Tom Stone - I'll BRB....

The Informer - Tom Stone is walking down the aisle... He's in the ring!! Stone has his foot on Stallion's chest!! Mike Hunter counts... 1.... 2.... 3!!!!!!!!!!

[Serial Thrylla won the match in 0 minutes and 45 seconds.]

Johnny Bones - Here is your winner, Serial Thrylla!!

The Informer - Tom Stone has the mic!!!!

Tom Stone - GOOOOOOOOODBYE ITALIAN STALLION!!!!!!!!

The Informer - There goes the lock on the cage!! Nomad is up!! TNT is climbing the cage!! He's at the top... Oh No... I hate when they go up there.... Nomad is climbing the cage!! He's at the top!! TNT with a eye gouge... He scoops up Nomad, walks to the center of the cage....... The Flames Of Extinction!!-- THROUGH THE CAGE... AND A TABLE!!!!!!! TNT released Nomad on his way down... TNT is still on top, Nomad is out on the mat!! This is insane!!

[Blackout. DFA lights up on the EWA Big Screen... Serial Thrylla kicks in as Serial Thrylla flys down from the cieling on a rip-cord.]

Tom Stone - HOLY SHIT!!!!!! SERIAL THRYLLA COMES DOWN AT FULL SPEED.... GRABS TNT...... DFA THROUGH THE TABLE!!!!!!! Serial Thrylla is lifted back up to the ceiling... Both men are out!! Both tables are broken!! The lights come back... Nomad rolls on top of TNT...

The Informer - Mike Hunter counts... 1.... 2... 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Nomad won the match in 67 minutes and 49 seconds.]

Johnny Bones - Here is your winner, The EWA Heavyweight Champion, Nomad!!