Mike Victory presents... EWA Tuesday Night Tsunami Fleet Center, Boston MA Tuesday August 5th 2003
A highlights package of last week's Tsunami plays, illustrating the increasingly out of control nature of the Last Vengeance situation. Inside the arena the crowd pop like crazy at the clips of Thurman Skydive costing Cyril Acheston and Malinko their handicap match with Pain Express, Layton Matthews and Ms Black. The package closes with the image of Hells Angel and Cyril Acheston laughing at Thurman Skydive in front of the flaming announce table...
'Hang On' - Glen plays as a backdrop to the Tsunami opening credits before we go inside the arena and the ever-deafening opening pyro display. The crowd blow the roof off the arena all over again as the crowd shoots all over them. A fan holds up a cardboard cut-out of George W. Bush, with Davlin McCaine's face stuck over his own with the phrase 'DAVLIN FOR PRESIDENT' underneath. The last one visible before the camera swings to the announce table is a 'WE WANT THURMAN' sign...
Downs: Boston is ready...and believe me this is not gonna be no Tea Party...ladies and gentlemen, less than two weeks from Adrenaline Rush...welcome to Tsunami!
Carvanelie: And it's going to be a great night Maura! You know why? Because Thurman Skydive is sitting at home in New York City watching us...he's suspended tonight by Mike Victory!
Downs: And that decision was a crock. I, better than a lot of people know what jerks Last Vengeance are. They're sick, uncaring bastards, and if it wasn't for Thurman Skydive...well I don't even want to think about it.
Carvanelie: Now I'll admit what they wanted to do to you last week wasn't very nice...but you can hardly say you didn't provoke them Maura!
Downs: You know something Louis, I'm really not in the mood for your sh*t this week. Let's just talk about the show okay?
Carvanelie: What...like our Main Event? The final match in the second US Title semi-final. Davlin McCaine and The Butcher have been at each others throats for the longest time, and tonight it comes to an end!
Downs: That should be a great match-up, and we'll also see that evil bastard Cyril Acheston defend the World Of Pain title against Layton Matthews. Dr Mental makes his in-ring debut against the impressive Pain Express...and Caveman returns to the EWA today to take on an EWA legend - Lucretia Black...
Carvanelie: Rachel Pitt...AND LOOK WHO'S COMING OUT!
Same Old...
Survivor's 'Eye Of The Tiger' starts to play, and there's a noticeably mixed reaction for EWA Owner Mike Victory as he steps through the curtains and marches towards the ring. He looks out on the crowd, apparently displeased at the reaction they're giving him.
Downs: Seems there are a lot of people here in Boston tonight that wanted to see Thurman Skydive, huh Louis?
Carvanelie: Yeah well...there's no accounting for good taste. Then again, this is Boston...
Victory steps through the ropes, shaking his head, then takes a microphone from the ring announcer who offers him a sympathetic look...
Victory: Now I appreciate that a lot of you people here tonight are a little upset with my decision to order CEO Thurman Skydive to take the night off here tonight. - (crowd boo again) - But you need to understand, it had to be done. For the good of the EWA, the company who's talented roster you're here tonight to see. This Last Vengeance-Thurman Skydive thing had gone too far. You saw last week...Cyril Acheston and James Roberts almost powerbombed an announcer through the announce table that they'd previously set on fire. Under Thurman Skydive's provocation Last Vengeance have gotten completely out of hand, and it has to stop.
Downs: I agree with that, but getting rid of the guy that's been the one doing more than anyone to stop them isn't they way to do it Victory...
Carvanelie: Victory you idiot...when will these guys get that there ain't no stopping Last Vengeance?
Victory: That's why I ordered him to stay home tonight. He gets a chance to cool off, Acheston and Roberts get a chance to cool off. It works for both parties, and I can stand here in the ring tonight to deliver the announcement that Skydive was supposed to make last week...
The crowd grow into a hushed silence as Victory points to the tron...which airs a short piece of footage depicting the history of the EWA Tag Team Championship. It fades away to stills of the title belts, and applause from the fans...
Victory: Those things right there are the EWA Tag Team Championship belts...and they are currently vacant. Their previous holders were Revolution X - Christian Cage and John Steele...both of whom, of course, are no longer with Extreme Wrestling Action. The Tag Team titles are therefore, currently vacant. Therefore as owner of the EWA, along with CEO Thurman Skydive, I have devised another tournament for another vacant championship. Given the success of the recent United States Championship tournament, I hope to see an equally successful and competitive competition this time round...and with that in mind I would like to announce four of the eight teams here and now...
Downs: What?? This is huge...a tournament for the titles...what a way to start Tsunami!
Carvanelie: So who's in it Victory...don't keep us waiting!
Victory: First and foremost I'd like to announce that a team representing Last Vengeance will be involved in the tournament. The second team I'd like to announce as entered into the tournament is The Dark Carnival - Dr. Mental and the EWA Universal Champion, The Great Malinko...
Carvanelie: Hey Maura, this tournament sounds great! Last Vengeance...Malinko...I can hardly wait!
Downs: How the hell do Last Vengeance deserve a Tag title shot? Damnit Victory, will you please pull your finger out and do something about them?
Victory: After a conversation with Shadow earlier this week, I am pleased to announce that he requested his to protege's, The Butcher and Nightengale to Tag together, and they will also enter into the tournament for the Tag Team gold.
Downs: Shadow asked for them to be teamed? But I thought Nightengale and Butcher couldn't stand each other....that doesn't bode well for those two in tag competition!
Carvanelie: Ha ha...but come on...you can't tell me it won't be amusing watching them fight each other and their opponents at the same time!
Victory: And finally for now...the fourth of eight teams to enter the tournament will be...THE DYING BREED!
The crowd pop loudly for this final announcement, clearly pleased that Matthews and Black will be in the tournament...but they quickly descend into boos as 'Weak And Powerless' starts to play, and onto the stage walks Cyril Acheston. He walks out onto the stage, and yells at one of the tech crew to pull the World Of Pain title belt off from around his waist...he then yells at the tech man for touching his title belt then shoves him to the ground, taking the belt and holding it in the air as he walks down the ramp.
Downs: There you see one of the biggest sumb*tches in the EWA folks. That guy should be fired...
Carvanelie: Fired..."FIRE"d...get it Maura!!
Downs: Sometimes you can be a real prick...
Acheston pauses outside the ring, then throws his belt over the ropes and into it...he threw the belt right at Mike Victory who only just moves to avoid it. Now Acheston slides in, smiling at Victory, then grabbing the microphone from him...prompting Victory to request another from the time-keeper...
Victory: Now unlike Thurman Skydive, I'm not going to pander to your demands, your cries for attention and your ridiculous statements. Cyril Acheston, I'm not interested in what you have to say...please return to the OOOHHHH
Downs: CYRIL ACHESTON JUST KICKED THE OWNER OF THE COMPANY IN THE BALLS...That guy is just off the page repulsive!
Carvanelie: I thought you didn't like Mike Victory, Maura. I thought Mike Victory was the guy who suspended your precious Thurman Skydive!
Downs: Yeah, but I don't want to see him get kicked in the balls...least of all by that scum Cyril Acheston!
Carvanelie: Tell me...are you such a generic good guy-loving play-by-play commentator that there are absolutely no heels you do like?
Downs: You're real funny...
Acheston: Victory, I'll keep this short...welcome to Last Vengeance's show. You own the company...WE RUN THE COMPANY! Tuesday Night Tsunami...this is our home, our show...our night. Now you want to come out here and tell Last Vengeance that we're in a tag title tournament, that's all fine. But you want to interrupt me when I come out here and tell me to go away...NO YOU DON'T SON!
Don't you realise who I am? Maybe you're too busy in Delaware or wherever the hell you're from rolling around in your wads of cash to realise that I'M CYRIL ACHESTON. You dumb son of a b*tch, I'm the World Of Pain Champion...when I come to this ring you will respect me. You don't tell me what to do...you don't tell me sh*t old man. So from now one, you get one thing straight...OOOOHHH SH*T YOU MOTHERF....
Acheston drops the mic and falls to his knees, as from the floor Victory scores with a clean, sweet kick right into the crotch of the World Of Pain Champion. Hauling himself to his feet, he looks down at Acheston, who is cradling his genitalia soothingly through his pants, and smiles down at him. Shaking his head, he points to himself, gesturing that he runs the show...right before 'Eye Of The Tiger' plays again, and Victory rolls from the ring and up the ramp...
Downs: Now I'll be darned if that wasn't a pleasant way to start the evening! I could start every Tsunami seeing Cyril Acheston getting kicked in the balls...couldn't you Louis?
Carvanelie: No...no I couldn't! This is a disgrace Maura. Why is it that every power figure in the company seems to lay their hands on the talent. You get sued for physical abuse in the workplace in every other freakin' industry!
Downs: This isn't any other industry...this is the EWA, and when you treat the owners with nothing but contempt and disrespect, I don't see what you have to complain about!
Carvanelie: Are we going to get some wrestling or something soon...because I can't take any more of this anti-Last Vengeance brain-washing you're putting out to all the people at home...
Downs: BRAIN-WASHING...THEY ALMOST POWERBOMBED ME THROUGH A FLAMING TABLE YOU INSENSITIVE JERKWAD...
Carvanelie: I must apologise for my commentary partner people...she's a little highly strung today...lets go to commercials...
Noises In The Dark
"Dean. Dean" was the cry of one of the producers, "locker room five now.
Rumour has it Ms.Black and Layton are sitting and vunerable for an
interview?"
"Really?" the camera man said gathering his stuff together, "I'm on my way"
At that point the camera man charges down the corridoor at full pace. This
is one of the few times Ms.Black and Layton have been caught backstage
together and its no suprise the footage would really earn some brownie
points with the producer. Without thinking the camera man bursts into the
locker room, only to find it seemingly empty and pitch black. Suddenly the
door slams closed and we loose recording. Groans can be heard, closely
followed by a few screams alerting security. At that point though we return
live once again inside the locker room thanks to the camera which appears to
have been dropped to the floor but is angling upward. Ms.Black sits at the
side adjusting her hair somewhat and making a subtle adjustment to her top,
while opposite her Layton kicks the camera man to one side before leaving
the room to be confronted by another camera crew who have raced to the
scene.
"Layton what happened in their?" the reporter asked as Layton tried to push
past.
"What do you mean?" Layton said with a broad grin.
"Well we heard groans of agony and why were you sitting in the dark? Were
you preparing for your match or something?" the reporter said trying his
best to gain Laytons attention.
"Agony?" Layton laughed, "you really think that was him groaning in there?"
he said as his grin continued to grow. I mean lets not flatter Cyril here, I
wasn't sitting in their thinking about him. A mans got urges, you don't
really think I would leave a man in that state for interupting my thoughts
do you?" he joked.
"I don't understand" the reporter replied confused.
Just then Ms.Black came past Layton taking a playful pinch of his ass,
Layton turned and grinned once more and you could see the penny begin to
drop for the reporter. Suddenly the reporters mind began to wonder and
realising this, Ms.Black kicked him in the shin before the two interlocked
arms and head off into the distance.
Downs: Relaxed aren't they.
Carvanelie: Tell me they weren't.
Downs: Don't worry I won't, lets just say I think they were having a quiet
cup of tea.
Carvanelie: Noooo........
Downs: **Laughs**...anyway, it's time for our first contest...and this one should be an interesting contest between four of our newer talents on the roster...
Fourway Finishers Only Elimination Match Nightengale vs Trill vs Erik Dean vs Smoke
The lights go out and the quote "Every man has his own destiny: the only
imperative is to follow it, to accept it, no matter where it leads him."
-Henry Miller The Wisdom of the Heart appears on the screen as "Numb" starts
to play in the background. Then those words morph into a set of eyes as
Nightengale walks out with Shadow behind him. He looks down at the ground
the whole time. When he enters the ring he goes to the corner next to him
and puts the cross on it and prays. Shadow stays outside of the ring and
watches. Nightengale sits in the ring praying.
Downs: What do you think Nightengale is thinking in the ring?
Carvanelie: He's probably saying a prayer for his opponents.
Downs: Shadow appears to be calling for focus.
Carvanelie: Whats the referee doing though?
Downs: Asking Shadow to head back to the locker room it would appear.
Carvanelie: Why?
Downs: I guess so he doesn't have a say in the match.
Carvanelie: What has he done to get sent to the back though.
Downs: I think it's a precaution
Carvanelie: That's so not fair.
Downs: I think thats what Nightengale is saying, although he would be best
going back to his prayers and focusing on the task in hand; especially with
Trill standing only a few yards away and seperated by the fickle defense of
the referee.
The arena is quiet as the fans wait for something to happen, then a loud
bang goes off as the lights in the arena dim down to low, them the sound of
"Faint" by Linkin Park hits the PA and the crowd goes a bit wild as Pyro
from Colors red to Yellow shoots off into the arena sky. Erik Dean emerges
from the backstage area and enters the stage area. Dean stops and looks
around at the crowd a bit and can see flashes coming from cameras going off,
almost a bit blinding. Dean then walks down the ramp way slowly taking his
time and enters the ring area and climbs into the ring.
The Lights dim, so you can barley see infront of your face. There is a
certain calm around the arena. Then a Green firework shoots as No Quarter by
Tool hits, and Smoke comes out to the top of the ramp. He stands at the top
looking around and then begins to walk down the ramp, high-5ing the fans,
and siging autographs. He then slides into the ring, and poses on the top
turbuckle in each corner. He talks to the fans in each little corner. He
then jumps down and tries to hide his obvious pain. Having been burnt badly
in his last encounter, its no suprise he is still suffering a degree of
after effects.
Downs: What a trooper Smoke is competing in his current condition.
Carvanelie: What lightly toasted?
Downs: Its no laughing matter.
Carvanelie: Not for him it isn't no.
Down: Eric Dean is making his debut tonight, the SFT big namer is going to
be keen to make a big impact in this encounter.
Carvanelie: Just hopefully he won't be as keen on setting the place on fire
as James Roberts was last week.
Downs: No pun intended on your part I am sure.
Carvanelie: Of course not.
Back in the ring, while the referee checked Eric Dean for any foreign
objects Nightengale was keen to make an early impression by taking Smoke and
tossing him over the ropes and to the concrete. If he was still suffering
from his serious burns suffered last week, then he was especially sure to
feel the impact made on the cold concrete surrounds. Dean meanwhile was keen
also to make an early impression. Ducking under Trill's right hand he
managed to go immediately on the offense taking his opponent down with a
hiptoss, before following up with two more throws which set up the big DDT
to follow. Trill was reeling, but upon looking for the finisher he calls
'Spoken Words' only to be countered by a back body drop.
Downs: Could have been a dramatic entrance right there from the former SFT
star.
Just then Trill sends Dean across the ropes, Trill looks for a back body
drop but telegraphs it. Dean is able to counter and not only just any
counter but counter into his version of the Pedigree he calls Spoken Words.
As Trill hits the canvas the referee calls for the bell and Dean turns
toward the action unfolding on the ring outside where Smoke and Nightengale
are going back and forth, although Nightengale has already made sure to
expose some of Smokes wounds.
Downs: Dean not to be outdone just made the dramatic entrance right there.
Carvanelie: I wasn't watching, its too much fun watching Smoke squirm on the
outside.
Avoiding a fierce right hand from Smoke, Nightengale sends his opponent into
the steel baricade before then being sent into the same baricade under the
weight of a dropkick delivered from the ring to courtesy of Eric Dean who
continues to make an impression with the fans in attendance. Once again Dean
went looking for his finisher, but this time thanks to some quick thinking
on the part of Nightengale it was not his turn to become another notch on
Deans bedpost. Using his slight size advantage he forced Dean backward into
the ring apron before driving a number of stiff kicks into the kidney of
Dean making sure that his opponent was a bit battered up before going for
the big moves. Smoke sat slumped against the apron a few yards watching on,
he was by no means beaten, but he was intelligent enough to realise now was
the time for a few seconds of recuperation rather than forcing the issue.
Nightgale first drives Deans jaw into the apron, before then grabbing his
arm and looking for what he calls 'The Hybrid Theory'. This time it is Deans
turn to counter as he scores with a desperate low blow, before then nailing
a spinkick which has the big man reeling be it for a brief second. At that
moment Smoke sees a chance to join the affray and as Nightengale staggers he
is sent tumbling under the weight of a huge lariat directed with a firesome
amount of force to boot. Nightengale is then double teamed as Dean and Smoke
stand above him and deliver one after another of stiff kicks which leave the
big man desperate for breath. Dean looks up at Smoke, considers his options,
before then looking for a kick to the gut. Smoke catches his foot, but Smoke
is then caught with an enziguri.
Downs: Impressive showing by Dean.
Carvanelie: More like utter stupidity from Smoke.
Dean looked for his finisher, attempting it for a fourth time tonight, only
this time he dwells just long enough for Smoke to break free before then
rising with an explosive forearm following by a fierce thrownig of his body
into the steel steps. Dean sits slumped and dazed, but not beaten just yet
remembering this is a finisher match. Smoke pulls Dean upward and although
Dean attempts to brawl his way out of trouble, not suprisingly Smoke despite
his injuries is able to win the battle of fists; in the end it is a
desperate rake of the eyes which buys Dean some time. Dean slides under the
bottom rope and comes back off the turnbuckle looking for a dropkick under
the bottom rope to send Smoke flying. Smoke sees Dean coming at the last
second and moves, before then grabbing Deans legs and driving his legs down
causing his spine to hit hard against the apron. As Dean wriths in pain,
Smoke pulls him to the outside before setting up for what he calls 'Up In
Smoke'. With an injured spine and possible bruised to the bone itself Dean
is powerless to prevent it from going down and seconds later he is left
hearing the sound of the referees bell announcing his elimination from the
encounter.
Carvanelie: Don't tell me Smoke is going to walk away with this one? I mean
he looks like he trod on a live wire.
Downs: No he looks like a man desperate for victory.
Carvanelie: Is it just me who is seeing the serious signs of over cooked
meat all over Smokes exposed flesh where the bandages have been ripped away?
Downs: No its just your the only one sick enough to make a joke about it.
Catching Smoke off guard Nightengale scores with a spear like manouver.
Smoke staggers backward and Nightengale quickly realises the big man is not
going to go to ground without a fight. Coming from behind Nightengale scores
with a chop block, before then following up with another and another until
Smoke falls to his knees. Despite the fans best efforts to cheer on the big
man, Nightengale then seizes the control. Putting an enormous amount of
leverage on the skin and bones of Smoke, Nightengale then looks to expose
the wounds of Smoke causing him to scream to the heavenly lord above. Some
men would quit at that point, but Smoke is neither some men, nor does he
have that option in this match; instead he is left suffering in pain.
Nightengale wraps his legs round ensuring the amount of freedom allowed to
Smoke is minimal, but in one bold and final desperate attempt to break free,
Smoke pulls himself semi-vertical before causing both he and Nightengale to
fall backward into the steel steps. The hold is broken on impact, but both
men suffer the price of the move.
Carvanelie: Was that such a good idea on Smokes part?
Downs: Depends who moves first, but I don't think he had much choice in his
predicament.
Carvanelie: That just shows how limited in skill and options Smoke is, the
human toastie aint all that really is he..
Downs: Like I say, lets see what happens.
Just then to a huge cheer and in much pain, Smoke rises to his feet first.
Although Nightengale is not far behind, Smoke provides a helping hand before
spinning his opponent round and looking for his finisher. Nightengale
suddenly looks very close to tasting defeat, when suddenly it becomes
apparent he is playing possom. As Smoke goes to execute, Nightengale hooks
his arm and turns it into the Hybrid Theory.
Downs: What a counter.
Carvanelie: Sorry what was that??
Downs: You heard.
The element of suprise catches Smoke off guard and before he knows what has
hit him he looks up to see the referee hoisting the weary hand of his
opponent. Dean looks on from the top of the rampway with a knowing look,
knowing only to well that could have been him had he not made that small
mistake. Then again as the EMT's tend to Smoke, you can imagine he too is
going home knowing he was not far from tasting victory either.
Downs: Well I tell you something Louis...I could do with seeing more opening contests like that one. That match was just wild!
Carvanelie: Sure...sure it was Maura, you enjoy that. Personally I'm looking forward to one thing and one thing only...Davlin McCaine beating the hell out of The Butcher...that guy is just a living legend!
Downs: Right...sure he is. I guess it's unfortunate for you that he's not out till much later in the evening really?
Carvanelie: Well who's up next?
Downs: Caveman and Lucretia Black, one-on-one.
Carvanelie: A big ugly guy beating on that silly, identity-challenged psychopath, Rachel Pitt...genius! Thanks Maura, you really know how to cheer a guy up...
Downs: I live to serve.
Carvanelie: And you know your place to!
Downs: Go to hell Louis...
Lucretia Black vs Caveman
�You should be Dancing� By the bee gees begins to burst through the Fleet Center as Sam Smarts and the Caveman walk out. Sam dances his way out to the ring with mic in one hand and a cigar in the other.
Carvanelie: This guy talks so often he carries a mic with him at all times.
Crowd boos passionately, however there are a few who proudly display their Sam inc merchandise. Sam Smarts makes his way through the ring he gets up on the apron and waits for the Caveman to lower the ropes so he can walk in with ease. Caveman does so and then leaps into the ring himself.
Sam Smarts: Cut the music, I must say I am not one bit happy tonight. No its not because there isn�t a title on my clients belly nor because our arch rival the clown has the biggest one. No. The reason I am not happy is because I am in Boston. Yup Boston.
Crowd Boos at the top of their lungs. With every taunt, and booing Sams Sinister Smile seems to be getting larger and larger.
Sam Smarts: I didn�t realize I was in Boston until I found out Everything in town is "a five minute walk" and when I did get to downtown after my long five minute traffic filled walk I ordered a frank but the guy told me its not frank its haht dahgs, Franks are money from France he said.
Crowd continues to Boo.
Sam Smarts: And since when did the English language lose the letter �R�? its Nomar not nomah , its �how are you� not �Hahwahya�,�. I could go on forever but its only going to make it more painful on you, just like your baseball team the Red sucks do. 152 games every year just to realize you aren�t going to the playoffs but the Yankees are.
Crowd starts tossing bottle and pop corn at Sam.
Sam Smarts: Wow wow hold on a second Boston I am not a trash can don�t throw that sh*t at me, oh wait its called a barrel down here isn�t it? Haha.
Downs: What an ass that guy is. I'm sure glad we've got him back here on Tsunami. I don't know what we'd have done without him for too much longer.
Carvanelie: I dunno...I like Sam. And you have to admit, everything he said about Boston was true. It's not exactly America's greatest selling point...
Downs: Of course, it's not Davlin McCaine is it?
Carvanelie: I know you're being sarcastic, but that's actually an excellent point!
Caveman leans against the turnbuckles, and it's hard to tell whether he's listening to Smarts or not, but he's damn sure listening as Rammstein's 'Sonne' starts to blast through the Fleet Center, and through the curtain, her eyes fixed on her gargantuan opponent. She walks down the ramp, slowly pulling off her extravagent entrance attire...
Downs: Ms Black made her return to the EWA two weeks ago, and last week she was on the winning team in the two-on-three handicap match...
Carvanelie: Thanks to her good ol' buddy Thurman Skydive. And Maura, what is with her and Matthews? You can't just be f*cking backstage when they both have huge matches...
Downs: Well huge match has never been more appropriate a description than for this one. Caveman has got a massive height and weight advantage. Now whatever experience advantage, speed advantage, or whatever...Black has a mountain to climb to even stand a chance here.
Carvanelie: Not that I actually like standing up for Pitt, but in her defence. She has experience and intelligence advantages over Caveman...he's about as smart as roadkill...and you want to talk athleticism...a freakin' two hundred year old oak tree has more agility than Caveman. I really think she's going to walk this.
Black for her part looks deadly focused. She stands in the corner of the ring, finally pulling her entrancewear away...and throwing it into the referee's face! The referee is enveloped in clothing, and Lucretia pulls a crowbar from her boot...AND LEVELS SMARTS WITH IT! Caveman's manager goes down in a heap...but Caveman shoves a hand over Black's throat, and showing unbelievable power he throws her clear across the ring. She hits the canvas hard then bounces up...but then sprints right back at Caveman, driving her head into his midsection. But that just did more damage to her own neck than to Caveman, who laughs down at her...THEN SENDS A SLAPPING SOUND ECHOING THROUGH THE ARENA WITH A HUGE OPEN-HAND CHOP TO THE BACK. She falls to her knees breathing hard, but quickly gets pulled up. She shoots a glance at the official, who's view is blocked by the huge frame of the Caveman...AND SHE HITS HIM CLEAN IN THE BALLS!
That shook the big man, and the crowd get behind Lucretia as she climbs to the top rope...AND COMES OFF TO STAGGER CAVEMAN WITH A MISSILE DROPKICK. He tumbles backwards a little, and Black leaps to her feet, springboards off the middle rope into another dropkick. Again the big man is rocked, and now she shoots herself off the ropes...SPEAR! She hits a hard spear to the stomach...AND CAVEMAN GOES DOWN!!
The pop for that is deafening, and Black nods her head in appreciation before climbing back to the top rope. She looks set to jump off...but Sam Smarts is grabbing her ankle! He tries his best to pull her off, but finally she manages to kick him to the floor...unfortunately Caveman is up! Lucretia turns back to the ring...AND CAVEMAN SHOVES HER OFF THE TOP ROPE - AND SHE HITS THE ARENA FLOOR FLAT ON HER BACK!!
That bump was sickening, and she doesn't move, even as Sam Smarts stands over her delivering crotch chops and describing different positions he'd like to...never mind. Slowly Caveman steps over the top rope to the outside, then pulls Black to her feet, pressing her in the air - then dropping her throat first over the crowd barrier. She comes up from it clutching her neck and gasping for air...and she walks straight into a big boot, which drops her flat on her back on the floor again. A smile now breaks out over Caveman's face, and he looks down at his fallen opponent, who's eyes are closed and can barely move. Raising a boot again, he places it down across her stomach...AND HE'S STEPPING ON HER! HE'S DRIVING HIS 501 LBS DOWN ONTO HER STOMACH THROUGH ONE FOOT!
Carvanelie: Now that is one of the funniest things I've seen in all my time as an EWA announcer.
Downs: Personally I find it disturbing. I think a lot of the employees here in Extreme Wrestling Action need some stringent psychological testing...and Caveman apparently should also be included in that list. Come on you big animal, she's less than two hundred pounds!
Finally he steps off her, and piefaces the referee away as he tries to admonish him for his actions. Now Sam Smarts is up again, and he grabs ahold of the referee, turning him away from the action and initiating a heated argument...as Caveman pulls out a steel chair from under the ring. Lucretia Black is leaning against the ringpost, gasping for air, and she has no idea what's coming! Caveman takes a swing...BUT HE MISSES!
The chair hits the ringpost hard, and sents shooting pains through Caveman's hands. Black rolls the other side of the ring steps...and dropkicks them into Caveman's knees! He's staggered and bent over, and Ms Black climbs quickly to the second rope...COMING OFF WITH AN ELEVATED FAME ASS-ER onto the ring steps! That was brutal, and both are down hurting...or are they?? Caveman is moving still! He just got his face mashed into the steel steps and he still hasn't stopped. He just shakes the cobwebs clear and looms over Black again. She kicks out, kicking him in the knees a couple of times, but pretty soon he has her by the throat...two hands wrapped around her neck and he's lifting her high into the air! He takes a couple of huge steps AND PUSHES HER HEAD BACK AGAINST THE RINGPOST!
She slumps down to the floor, but doesn't stay there for long, because Caveman is already pulling up into the military press position...and dumps her over the top rope and into the ring. Stepping over the top and in himself, he rolls to the mat, and covers her (1...2...kickout!)
Lucretia shot the shoulder up, to cheers of delight from the sellout crowd. And now she sits up, pulling hair back from her eyes JUST IN TIME TO SEE A BOOT FLYING INTO HER FACE! Caveman had shot himself off the ropes into a running (well slow jogging) boot to the face, and she goes down again. Again Caveman comes off the ropes and he connects with the big leg drop! Again he goes for the cover (1...2...Thrrr KICKOUT!)
Ms Black just kicked out for a second time, but her eyes are rolling back in her head. The situation doesn't look good for her...and it's about worse...CAVEMAN IS PULLING HER INTO THE POWERBOMB POSITION! He smiles maniacally and points outside the ring...THEN LIFTS HER UP!!!
He was calling for a powerbomb over the top rope to the outside...AND HOLY SH*T HE HIT IT!!! LUCRETIA BLACK JUST GOT POWERBOMED FROM OVER FIFTEEN FEET IN THE AIR TO THE SOLID, COLD ARENA FLOOR!!! The fans are chanting 'HOLY SH*T' at the top of their voices, and that truly was one of the damndest things you're ever likely to witness.
Downs: That was just vile, Louis...just vile! Caveman is an ill animal, unleashed on the EWA with all the social skills of...well he has no social skills, and he just brutalised the former EWA One Champion with a powerbomb from inside of the ring to the floor!
Carvanelie: Ha ha...and look at Sam Smarts! He's putting her back into the ring...he's a genius!!
Downs: Hey come on...at least make the big lump go through the motions ref! Ms Black is done we all know...but come on!
Smarts lifts her up and rolls her into the ring...and the big Caveman covers her again. (1...2...THE REFEREE GETS DRAGGED OUT OF THE RING!!) - IT'S CYRIL ACHESTON! The World Of Pain Champion is back...and he just scoop slammed the referee onto the equal opportunity assassin (at least in this match) the floor!
Climbing onto the apron, he points to his title belt, which is back around his waist, then takes it off, pointing down at Lucretia, indicating that he's coming for her himself! He threatens the time-keeper with physical abuse unless he gets him a chair, and now Acheston is in the ring...and he's armed!
Meanwhile, Caveman is still covering Ms Black, still not having worked out what's going on! Finally he gets up and turns around...AND HE JUST GETS ROCKED WITH A HUGE SHOT WITH THE CHAIR! The dent in the weapon is huge...but Caveman is still standing! He shakes his head and looks enraged...BUT GETS A SECOND CHAIR SHOT FOR HIS TROUBLE! Part of the chair is hanging off now...and Caveman still isn't going down. Acheston winds up again...AND FOR THE THIRD TIME HE CRACKS CAVEMAN'S SKULL WITH THE CHAIR...AND THE CHAIR IS BROKEN!!
Cyril Acheston just broke a steel chair over Caveman's head...and he's still standing! Last Vengeance might have the comany officials on the run, but they're not having anywhere near that much success with the Caveman...as three shots and breaking a chair on his head haven't been enough! He looks dazed though, and Acheston yells at the poor, hassled time-keeper to throw him another chair!
Winding up again, Acheston swings...AND CONNECTS AGAIN!! That's four chair shots, and each one has got progressively harder...and still Caveman isn't going down! His pupils are rocking about like tugs in a seastorm, but he's not going down! Acheston is getting frustrated as sh*t now! He came out to deal with Ms Black personally, and now he's in a battle of wills with the biggest athlete in the EWA! He climbs to the top rope now...AND DIVES OFF INTO A FLYING FIFTH CHAIR SHOT...AND CAVEMAN HAS BEEN OPENED UP!
There's blood pouring down his face, but still he won't go down! Acheston looks down at the chair in bewilderment...and sees that it's broken as well!!
Downs: MY GOD!! CYRIL ACHESTON HAS BROKEN TWO STEEL CHAIRS OVER HIS HEAD AND STILL HE ISN'T DOWN...AND WHERE, BY HELL, IS THE REFEREE?
Carvanelie: By hell he's still down...and Cyril has a third steel chair!!
Acheston gives the third chair a pat and motions that the third time's supposed to be lucky, and he throws it at Caveman's face...BUT CAVEMAN CATCHES IT! He shakes his head, becoming enraged, the taste of his own blood spurring him on. Acheston is in trouble, and he backs off a couple of feet...BEFORE LAUNCHING INTO THE FINAL SHOT TO THE CHAIR!! He just hit his finishing move to the chair, which shot back into Caveman's face...and he's wobbling! Acheston backs off...AND HITS A SECOND FINAL SHOT TO THE CHAIR...AND CAVEMAN DROPS!!! THE BIG MAN IS DOWN, THE BIG MAN HAS GONE DOWN!!!
Cyril smiles at last, and grabs the hair of the lifeless body of Lucretia Black. That sick powerbomb was enough to leave her for dead, and Cyril has her at his mercy...NO HE DOESN'T - LAYTON MATTHEWS IS SPRINTING TO THE RING!! The Showcase Superstar is coming to save his tag partner...AND CYRIL DOESN'T WANT ANY PART OF HIM!! The World Of Pain Champion is running away!! He leaps the crowd barrier and disappears into the masses...BUT MATTHEWS IS IN PURSUIT!!
Layton is chasing Cyril through the crowd...as in the ring Ms Black has somehow got an arm over the fallen giant...AND THE REFEREE IS UP!!! None of the three are particularly conscious, but Lucretia has her arm over Caveman, and the referee has enough of his wits about him to make the count (1......2.......3!!!)
Downs: YES...YES...YES!!! LUCRETIA BLACK HAS DONE IT!!! SHE BEAT THE CAVEMAN!
Carvanelie: Thanks to Cyril Acheston, she sure did! This is unbelievable!! He just accidentally helped Lucretia Black get the win!
Downs: Well we know she's got her sights set on Acheston's World Of Pain title...and he wanted to come out here and put her out of the hunt first hand...
Carvanelie: And it's Caveman that paid the price...
Downs: Paid the price? Good God almighty this monster is up...AND NO YOU SICK HUMAN BEING...DAMNIT YOU ALREADY...
Downs' sentence gets drowned out as Caveman pulls Lucretia to her feet...AND CHOKESLAMS HER!! That was just uncalled for, and he kicks out at the referee before stepping over the top rope and stomping up the ramp looking in an absolute rage. Lucretia Black has won the match...but she needs medical attention badly as we fade to commercials...
The returning Thurman Skydive presents... EWA Tuesday Night Tsunami Kemper Arena, Kansas City MO Tuesday August 5th 2003
Ambulance
We return from the commercial break to shots of the parking lot, where we see an ambulance, it's red lights flashing through the darkness, as someone is loaded into the back of it on a stretcher. Getting a closer look, we see that it's Lucretia Black. She has a protective collar around her neck, and is lifted carefully into the back by the EMT's. Finally the ambulance speeds away from the Fleet Center, as in the arena spontaneous applause breaks out for Ms Black, and her gutsy effort against the huge monster that is Caveman...
Downs: It's always sad to see a competitor get hurt. It's even worse when you know that one man went out of his way to make it even worse. Sam Smarts and Caveman ought to be ashamed of themselves. I'm not going to say they lost fair and square, but Caveman lost...why can't he just deal with it?
Carvanelie: Who really cares, Maura...it's just Rachel Pitt. Knowing her she's probably smooth-talking the EMT's in the back of that ambulance right now.
Downs: Why are you being such an insensitive bastard today Louis? What as Ms Black ever done to you? Nothing, but you're sitting here making piss-poor jokes about her whilst she's on her way to hospital with her neck in a protective collar. Just call the action will you?
Carvanelie: With pleasure...Dr Mental's making his debut right here, and right now!
Downs: He damn sure is, and of course, we're still unsure of the whereabouts of Universal Champion, The Great Malinko. He was originally booked to have the show off...but by the same token, we know he's no longer on vacation.
Carvanelie: So I guess with his tag partner in action here, you figure he might show up? You have a suspicious mind, Maura!
Downs: I'm being realistic...I've seen too much, for too damn long in this company not to be!
Falls Count Anywhere Match Pain Express vs Dr Mental
Both men are making their singles debuts tonight, so you know the pressure is really on for this one. The crowd too seem a little extra jazzed as 'Angry Chair' - Alice In Chains hits, and they give a generous pop to the King of the Gimmick Matches, Pain Express. He holds his personalised steel chair high in the air, almost reminding fans of the chair-swinging action they saw in the previous match as he heads to the ring.
But as he enters, he puts it on the mat, starting to job lightly on the spot, pointing down the ramp and beckoning the arrival of his opponent. A faint smile even breaks out onto his face as Des-Ree's 'Life' starts to play, and out onto the stage walks the new recruit to the EWA roster, Dr Mental.
Downs: Well he comes with a lofty reputation, and it's one that he'll be given every opportunity to live up to here in the EWA...
Carvanelie: And he got off to a great start aligning himself with the Universal Champion, and in my opinion the greatest Universal Champion the EWA has ever seen, The Great Malinko...
Downs: Together they're known as the Dark Carnival, and we know already that they've been entered into the Tag Title tournament. I'd say that those two are definitely ones to watch, wouldn't you?
Carvanelie: Is Davlin McCaine in the tournament?
Downs: So far, I don't think so...
Mental has already torn his white lab jacket off, and he rolls into the ring - grabbing PE's steel chair as he goes! The crowd boo loudly, but like he could care as he runs and the Indiana Terminator...but has the chair shot ducked under! Express knocks the chair out of his hands with the impact of some hefty right hands. Now he picks up the chair for himself, and jams it into the ribs of the debutant. Mental bends over in pain, but then avoids a chairshot from Express...by sweeping PE's legs away! The Terminator hits the canvas with his spine hard, and in a flash Mental has the chair, and he rests it over Express' face...AND DROPS THE LEG RIGHT ONTO IT!
Pain Express yells in pain, and rolls to the outside, falling onto his knees, clutching his face tightly. But Dr Mental doesn't let up. He rolls to the outside, still wielding the chair. He takes a swing, but PE shows great awareness by rolling underneath the ring to avoid the contact! The crowd laugh as Mental hits the ground, then throws up the ring apron in a fury...but PE isn't there!!
He crawled all the way underneath the ring...AND NOW HE'S BACK INSIDE IT! Mental straightens up, looking bewildered, completely unaware that Pain Express has climbed to the top rope! Mental looks up in time TO GET A FACEFUL OF PAIN EXPRESS AND STEEL CHAIR! Express just threw himself off the top, flattening the chair and his opponent in one swoop...and both men are crawling back to their feet, begging for more!
Pain Express looks down at the black mats on the arena floor, then tells Mental to hold on...and he pulls him away! Pain Express just exposed the concrete floor in it's entirity there...AND NOW HE'S TELLING MENTAL TO SLAM HIM ON IT! The crowd can't believe it, as Pain Express screams at Dr Mental to give him a slam onto the exposed concrete...BUT MENTAL DOESN'T NEED TO BE ASKED TWICE! Out of nowhere he scoops PE up...AND DROPS HIM WITH A RUNNING POWERSLAM RIGHT DOWN ONTO THE FLOOR!
The crowd have barely begun to chant 'HOLY SH*T' when Pain Express gets to his feet! He has a wild look in his eyes, and a sick grin on his face - HE ENJOYED THAT! Mental is livid...and now he's telling Pain Express to give him a slam on the concrete! This is like test of manhood now, as Mental is now yelling at Pain Express to 'grow some balls and slam' him! Express now lifts Mental over his shoulders...AND DROPS INTO A FALL FORWARD SLAM! All his weight went south, driving Dr Mental into the concrete...AND NOW DR MENTAL IS GETTING UP!!
Both men just willingly endured what could have been career-ending powerslams onto an exposed concrete floor just to see who's the tougher...and they still don't know! And now they're fighting again!! After looking each other up and down, trying to see if the slams had any real effect or not, they fly at each other with flurries of rights and lefts. Express tries to whip Mental into the ring steps...but Mental reverses...but PE jumps up and lands on the steps! He wobbles momentarily upon landing AND MENTAL KICKS THE STEPS OUT FROM UNDER HIM! Pain Express just feel backwards onto the ring steps, and that landing was not pleasant.
Mental has brought himself a little time, and he pulls out the lower half of the steps, then stomps on them, imploring Pain Express to get to his feet...SO HE CAN DELIVER A DDT ONTO THE STEPS...WHICH HE DOES! The Indiana Terminator's face just got driven into the steps, and he lies spread-eagles and unconscious over them! His back is exposed here, and Mental picks up the chair...THEN BRINGS IT DOWN OVER PE'S SPINE!
The sound of that shot was unreal, but it does seem to have, at least, brought Express round a little bit, as Mental pulls him up by his hair - then hangs him over the guard rail. PE crashes down over the barrier right onto his stomach, then rolls around, leaning back against it...only to be clotheslined over the top...and into the crowd!
Pain Express is reeling, and now Mental opens up the folding chair! He runs at it...jumps onto it...THEN ONTO THE CROWD BARRICADE! He motions that he's going to jump down onto PE...JUST AS HE TAKES A SHOT INTO THE KIDNEYS FROM HIM! Pain Express used one of the thick, heavy ringside chairs to jam into Mental's lower side, and he moans out loud...right before PE joins him on the barrier! He underhooks the arms...Tiger Driver?? From the barrier...HOLY SH*T YES IT WAS...AND DR MENTAL JUST TOOK A TIGER DRIVER OFF THE CROWD BARRIER...AND HE LANDED RIGHT ON TOP OF THE OPEN CHAIR!
Downs: These two are inhuman Louis...just inhuman! How else can you explain their desire to inflict such punishment on each other...and for that matter, why the hell do they seem to enjoy pain so much?
Carvanelie: Well I thought that little contest between them on the exposed concrete was something...but Dr Mental just took one of the most lethal forms of sit-out powerbombs there are from an elevated position...
Downs:...ie the barrier...
Carvanelie:...right down onto an open steel chair. I'd have to agree that is pretty inhuman...
Downs: I have to interrupt you...this one could be over already!!
It's falls count anywhere rules, and Pain Express has just hooked Mental's leg (1..2...shoulder up!). It's amazing that Dr Mental was able to feel his shoulder, let alone get it up there - his back could've been broken.
But that was just the first nearfall of the match. You have to think there'll be a few more left in the match...either that or the two men's desire for pain and punishment will see them both joining Lucretia Black in the emergency room. Either way, Pain Express is back on his feet, although he is staggering slightly, and he is dragging away a piece of the guard rail and setting it up in the aisleway! A couple of idiot fans storm forward and roll into the ring, starting a fight of their own before security steps in, whilst PE now looks under the ring and pulls out a trashcan.
It's obvious Pain Express is up to something...but now he has Dr Mental to deal with again! The Doc gets to his feet, leaving the mutilated wreckage of PE's steel chair on the floor, and he grabs PE's shoulders, turning him round ONLY TO GET LEVELLED WITH A SHOT WITH THE GARBAGE CAN!
Dr Mental got sent reeling again, and he staggers towards the aisle...ONLY FOR PE TO SLAM HIS HEAD INTO THE GUARD RAIL! Dr Mental has been knocked completely goofy, and he lies prone over the guard rail in the aisle...but Pain Express is heading back towards the ring! He climbs onto the apron...HE WANTS TO JUMP AT DR MENTAL!! The crowd rise to their feet...but then moan in disappointment as PE jumps down...BUT HE ONLY WANTED THE CAN AGAIN!!
He's completely insane, and he climbs back onto the apron...then puts the garbage can over his head!! He can't even see anything...BUT HE JUST DOVE OFF THE RING APRON TOWARDS THE GUARD RAIL...AND DR MENTAL MOVED OUT OF THE WAY!!
The noise of the human-torso-filled can crashing into the metal railing is one of the sickest sounds the EWA has ever heard...and both the rail, the can it's inhabitant are sent sprawling up the ramp! The fans are chanting 'PLEASE DON'T DIE' at PE, but he isn't in any condition to hear them! He could have internal injuries, as he starts coughing up blood, spitting up whole miniature puddles of it onto the ramp as Dr Mental leans against the barrier lining the aisle, breathing heavily. Finally he gets to his feet, still feeling his back that may have been injured with that tiger driver. He picks up the metal guard rail...AND DRILLS IT INTO PE'S STOMACH! He does it FOUR MORE TIMES! He's trying to put Pain Express out of wrestling for good here, and judging from the amount of the red stuff oozing out of the Terminator's mouth, he might have been successful.
Pulling him up again he drags him onto the stage then lifts him up...AND POWERBOMBS HIM INTO THE TSUNAMI SET! One of those metal set-walls just got dented by the body of the Indiana Terminator, and surely there's no way he can continue. He needs to go to hospital just as badly as Lucretia Black earlier...and maybe Mental wants to put him out of his misery as he goes for the cover (1...2...Thrrr NO!!)
Downs: My God how is Pain Express kicking out of that? Look at the blood pouring from his open mouth, and look at the vacant expression in his face...
Carvanelie: Much like the vacant space between his ears more than likely. This guy is insane...what the hell convinced him to jump off the apron inside a garbage can so he couldn't even see that his opponent had moved!
Downs: Well he calls himself the King Of The Gimmick Matches, and this is his first chance to really prove that reputation here in the EWA. He's not holding anything back...but he crashed and burned on that one
Carvanelie: Crashed and burned...he just crashed...then kinda rolled up the ramp...
Mental is still incredulous that PE kicked out of that last pin attempt, and he crouches over the limp body of his opponent, peppering him with violent rights and lefts. Looking up, he tears a pipe out of the set then looks down...HE'S CHOKING THE TERMINATOR WITH IT! King of the Gimmick Matches or not, Pain Express will be out of this if he can't breathe! He kicks his legs about, trying desperately to get Mental off...and he at least succeeds in rolling him off and gaining a little time to get to his feet...BEFORE MENTAL COMES BEHIND WITH A PIPE-ENFORCED CHOPBLOCK TO PAIN-EXPRESS'S BAD KNEE!
PE flies up, his legs coming up over his head, forcing him to land on the back of his head and neck. Even the crowd wince in pain with him, and he curls into the foetal position, flexing the knee out, trying to assess on the spot how much damage has been inflicted. But he doesn't get much time to recover, because he gets hauled to his feet...then gets his head slammed into one of the screens bearing the animated 'EWA' logo. Now Mental stands behind Express, and pushes him facefirst into the set, before clamping arms around him, then pulling PE over into a backroll...THEN INTO A GERMAN SUPLEX ON THE METAL RAMP...BUT PAIN EXPRESS LANDED ON HIS FEET...riiiiiight before his knee went out on him!
The pop for Express landing on his feet is almost as loud as the moan of sympathy and despair as his knee buckles on him after countering Dr Mental's version of Doug Williams' Chaos Theory. But Mental is like a hawk, and he goes straight back onto the attack. He grabs PE's leg...AND SLAMS IT DOWN AGAINST THE STAGING! Express writhes in pain, blood still coming from his mouth, and now his already ailing knee being exploited as well...and Mental has some ill intentions for that TV monitor he just ripped out of the set!
He raises it high into the air - Pain Express can't roll away - DR MENTAL JUST SMASHED A TELEVISION MONITOR OVER PAIN EXPRESS' LEG!! The various parts fly off everywhere, leaving the monitor a shell of it's former shelf...and even that's eradicated as the possessed Dr Mental lives up to his name, slamming PE's knee down repeatedly onto it until there's just nothing left!
The assault on his leg has left Pain Express practically immobile, as pain tortures his entire body. Suddenly, and completely ruthlessly, Dr Mental steals another page from Doug Williams playbook, and grabs PE's leg, dragging him up into the Torture Device! That move is just excrutiating...AND NOW MENTAL PULLS IT INTO A FACEFIRST FLAPJACK, DRILLING PE INTO THE STAGE!
Downs: I tell you something, I'm begging the referee to stop this match. This is just getting awful. Pain Express' leg could've been shattered...
Carvanelie: It's a falls count anywhere match! I thought he was the King of the Gimmick Matches...why should the King need a match to be stopped?
Downs: Because on this night, Dr Mental has just taken advantages of more opportunities...and he has Pain Express before him, and he's nothing but a bloody, completely unable to move, mess...
Maura Downs may be right, because Pain Express can barely crawl away from Dr Mental as the Doc pauses to taunt the fans. He manages to make it right into the entranceway, before slumping down onto his face, breathing heavily, and completely unable to put any weight on the injured leg. Meanwhile, Dr Mental is letting the riled up Boston crowd get to him. He shouldn't be giving Pain Express all this time, no matter how injured he may be.
Indeed, finally he turns round, and looks at the feeble sight of the Indiana Terminator. He's down on his face, a pool of blood coming up from his throat and a leg he can't even use. Laughing, Mental ambles over, almost strutting, taunting PE every step of the way...RIGHT UNTIL EXPRESS PULLS HIM OVER INTO THE INDIANA DEATHLOCK!!
He's got his finishing submission hold locked in out of nowhere...and suddenly it's Dr Mental's turn to feel the pain of having your leg tortured! He's got no escape like the bottom rope up here on the stage, and...is he going to tap out...NO! He just pulled the curtain down from the entrance...AND JAMMED THE CURTAIN RAIL INTO PE'S LEG!
Express breaks the hold, yelling and screaming in pain as he hops through the empty space where the curtain was, and comes back wheeling a huge pyro case! He's having to hop along as he pushes it...BUT SOMEHOW HE JAMS IT INTO DR MENTAL'S RIBS! Mental is staggered, and flops down on top of it...and now PE climbs onto it with him! He can't even put any weight onto that leg, and as he straightens up on his one good wheel, he bursts into coughs, hauling more blood up from the depths of his stomach...but he's pulling Mental up...NOBLE PURPOSE SPINEDRIVER!!! He's taken so much abuse in this match...surely he isn't going to pull this one out of nowhere?? (1...2...3!!) HE'S DONE IT!!!
Downs: What the hell?? The crazy...THAT CRAZY SON OF A B*TCH HAS WON THIS MATCH!!
Carvanelie: But...but...no! Mental was winning...Mental was kicking his ass...how is he the winner?
Downs: That Spinedriver is a sickening move...and he just did onto a metal stage, from a pyro...HEY NOOOOOOO
The crowd were cheering wildly, but start booing deafeningly as out onto the stage comes The Great Malinko! He pushes the pyro case...AND RUNS CLEAN THROUGH THE BACK OF PAIN EXPRESS' LEG WITH IT!! He goes down like a sack of potatoes...BUT MALINKO ISN'T DONE!! He lifts Express onto the pyro box...AND OH MY GOD...HE JUST SHOVED THAT PYRO CASE, PE ON TOP...20 FEET OFF THE STAGE TO THE TECH AREA BELOW!!
Downs: HE'S KILLED HIM!!! PAIN EXPRESS MUST BE DEAD...THE GREAT MALINKO JUST SENT HIM FOR THE RIDE OF HIS LIFE OFF THE STAGE...THAT SON OF A B*TCH!!
Carvanelie: Malinko's here! Hooray for the Universal Champion! And I guess Julia isn't here tonight either!
Downs: Damnit, do you think even could she could stop this psychopath? What the hell was that about? Pain Express just had a helluva match, and a helluva win over his friend Dr Mental...but...well thank goodness there are EMT's right on the scene...but he just sent Pain Express off the stage on top of that pyro case.
Carvanelie: He's the Universal Champion, and he's the saviour of the EWA. He snatched the Universal title from the jaws of mediocrity when he beat Christian Cage for the Universal title...and the Malinko era is well underway! Consider Express the first victim!
Downs: Oh he's a victim alright...and damnit look at Mental raising Malinko's hand like he's some kind of hero. The Great Malinko sickens every decent human being on this planet!
The show fades out to commercials with Insane Clown Posse's 'Southwest Voodoo' booming over the arena, and The Dark Carnival holding each others arms aloft, with sick smiles on their faces...
You're In...You're Both In
We come back inside the Presidential Skybox at the Fleet Center. Mike Victory isn't on the balcony looking out on the ring, rather he is reclining in an armchair on the telephone, apparently calling the hospital trying to check on the condition of Lucretia Black...
Victory: No LUCRETIA BLACK...no I haven't got a cold...I said LUCRETIA BLACK...I'M NOT SNEEZING LADY!...Listen to me...is there a...YES IT'S A NAME!...What do you mean there's no such...Rachel Pitt then??...No I'm not a relative I just...WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T TELL ME ANYTHING...she's with a friend??...But Layton...bleached haired guy discharged her????...but then...
Victory's phone conversation is cut short...AS SAM SMARTS PULLS THE PHONE CABLE FROM THE WALL! Mike Victory rises from his chair angrily. Smarts smiles at him...then points behind him. Victory turns...and looks straight into the ominous, wall-like body of Caveman. Victory looks up...AS CAVEMAN DUMPS THE TABLE NEARBY OVER...
Victory: What the hell are you two doing in my skybox?
Smarts: Well it's real simple. Cyril Acheston cost Caveman here a match...Caveman doesn't like to lose...especially when he wasn't even to blame.
Victory: I don't care what Caveman likes. I would like both of you gentlemen to remove yourselves from my skybox. I appreciate you're both upset, but I'm afraid it's water under the bridge by this point...
Smarts: No, because it doesn't work like that. Caveman is back, Mr Victory. Today was meant to be his triumphant return to EWA TV, and triumphant in the defeat of a former One Champion - Lucretia Black. Instead, it was ruined...Caveman demands compensation...
Victory turns back to Caveman, who picks up a table lamp from the floor...then smashes it with his fist...
Victory: Compensation...like a placement in the Tag Team Title Tournament? In fact, yes...that's a great idea! You guys...you've earnt a place in the tournament!
Smarts: Excellent! I'm glad you've seen sense Victory...maybe you are actually more than a puppet figurehead. So tell me...who's Caveman's partner going to be?
Victory: Maybe you didn't understand me Mr Smarts. I said 'you guys...you've earnt a place in the tournament'...
Smarts: But I don't...
Victory: Caveman's partner, Smarts...IS YOU! The EWA's newest tag team, Caveman and Sam Smarts! Now if you'll excuse me...I've got a vanishing superstar to look for...
Carvanelie: You know...maybe Sam Smarts shouldn't talk to much...
Downs: Oh he'll be doing plenty more than talking pretty soon! Can you imagine that rotund idiot in wrestling tights? Well we're going to see it real soon...he'll be wrestling in the Tag title tournament...
Carvanelie: What's scary is, after his performance here tonight - even with Smarts as his partner, Caveman has to be considered a favourite in the tournament. He's just so massive!
Downs: You may have a point there...and folks, I may have to apologise in advance for my biased commentary in this next match. However, after what Cyril Acheston and Hells Angel aka James Roberts as he's now known, did to me last week...it was the most terrifying experience of my life...
Carvanelie: You asked for it anyway...and loverboy Skydive saved you before you got hurt!
Downs: Louis, don't push it in this one. Anyway, yes I'll be doing my best to call the match...however, I really hope Layton Matthews kicks the living sh*t out of Cyril Acheston here tonight...
Carvanelie: That's assuming they both didn't chase each other all the way to Kansas City, where Tsunami's being held next week!
Downs: That is true. For anyone that may have joined us late, earlier in the evening Cyril Acheston got himself involved in the Caveman-Ms Black match...before Layton Matthews came to the ring to help his...
Carvanelie:...f*ckbuddy...
Downs:...do you have to be so goddamn crude? To help is tag partner out and he and Acheston ended up chasing each other through the crowd.
Carvanelie: Well Matthews has nowhere to run right now Maura!
Downs: Cyril was the one running I recall...and you're right, he can't run anymore...and his World Of Pain title is on the line!
World Of Pain Title Match Cyril Acheston (c) vs Layton Matthews
'Never Duplicated' starts to play, and there's a loouuud pop as the smiling face of the Showcase Superstar, Layon Matthews steps through the curtain and towards the ring. He makes title belt gestures around his waist, then looks into the lens of a camera, pointing out that this one's for Ms Black. Stepping through the ropes, he raises his arms to the fans as his name is called...before silence falls over the arena, and the fans wait to her 'Weak And Powerless', for the second time of the evening...but it doesn't! Marilyn Manson's 'Fight Song' hits...and the crowd start booing loudly as onto the stage walks not only the World Of Pain Champion, Cyril Acheston - but his Last Vengeance stablemate James Roberts!
Downs: Now wait just a second! What the hell is James Roberts doing out here? This is supposed to be Layton vs Cyril!
Carvanelie: They're friends. You read the card over on EWA.com, James Roberts was scheduled to be here. He's just not booked in a match this week thanks to the injuries he suffered in the Flaming Tables Match last week...
Downs: Well James Roberts and Cyril Acheston, all personal animosity aside, have been on a major tear in the last month. Despite their fellow LV member Tornado getting injured by The Butcher in the stable's on-screen debut, these two men have taken no prisoners, and looked unstoppable until last week...
Carvanelie: When Thurman Skydive stuck his nose where it wasn't wanted and wasn't welcome...
Inside the ring, Last Vengeance are posing cockily, before Roberts rolls backwards over the top rope and out of the ring...and now he's sauntering cockily towards the announce table! He pretends to make a jump for Maura who jerks back quickly, much to the amusement of the former Hells Angel. Finally he picks up a headset and sits unnervingly close to Maura, almost breathing over her shoulder...
Downs: What do you want you creep?
Roberts: Awww Maura...I just want to come out here and call the match with you. I mean, forget Butcher and McCaine, we all know this is the one the people came to see.
Carvanelie: You are so right there, James...can I call you James?
Roberts: Whatever...
Carvanelie: Why would anyone care about Davlin McCaine or The Butcher when LAST VENGEANCE are on the card?
Roberts: Exactly my point. I just want to come out here and call a showstealing match with you guys...watch Cyril Acheston take that punk, Layton Matthews, to school and show him why Last Vengeance are the be all, end all, and absolute everything of the EWA...
The referee is holding the World Of Pain title belt aloft, signalling that it's on the line in this match...and seconds later the match is underway as Acheston cheapshots Matthews before the bell rings! He snatches the belt from the referee and cracks Layton in the back of the head, and the Showcase Superstar is already down on one knee. He feels the knot on the back of his skull, but doesn't have time to react because Acheston is already over him, delivering a few stiff rights to the jaw. Layton falls to the mat, and covers up, waiting for the opportunity to get back to his feet. It comes as Cyril pauses to deliver a one-fingered salute to the Boston crowd...and in seconds Layton has nipped up...AND HE IS SENDING THE CROWD DELIRIOUS WITH A FLURRY OF INTENSE RIGHT HANDS!
Finally Acheston falls to the canvas, and Layton holds his arms in the air, giving a much more favourable salute to the ravenous crowd. He stands cocked and loaded, waiting for Cyril to get to his feet...to take him over with an armdrag. He tries to keep an armbar locked in, but Acheston rolls away and gets to his feet...and now he takes Layton over with the Japanese variant of an armdrag. Both men come up, and Acheston looks for a clothesline, but Layton ducks under it Matrix-style, then as Acheston turns, hits him with a spinning heel kick...and he comes out right in front of the announce table where James Roberts applauds him, yelling encouragement into the headset...
Acheston inhales deeply, looking ready to re-enter the ring...BUT LAYTON JUMPS TO THE MIDDLE ROPE...THEN TO THE TOP ROPE...THEN OFF INTO A SCINTILLATING CROSSBODY!! Both men hit the announce table with a crash...AND JAMES ROBERTS TAKES A CHEAP SHOT AT LAYTON!
He laughs in the face of the powerless referee, then sits down, brushing some hair from Maura Downs' forehead as he goes. As it is, both men get to their feet at the same time...AND SIMULTANEOUSLY SMASH EACH OTHER'S HEADS INTO THE ANNOUNCE TABLE! Both men fall backwards...only Acheston comes significantly closer to the ringbell. He picks it up from the timekeepers table...and clouts Layton over the head with it, sending the Dying Breed member flying onto his back again.
Layton's head has already taken some abuse in this one, but he's nowhere near done yet. Again he nips up, and scores with a couple of hard kicks, trying to knot up Acheston's thigh, before he jumps onto the ring apron...AND ASAI MOONSAULTS OFF IT. It's already clear that Layton's willing to do whatever it takes to win the World Of Pain gold tonight, and for the second time in a matter of minutes, both men are down in a heap on the floor...
Downs: And once again...Acheston is down! I'll repeat that for the benefit of jackasses sitting at this announce table...ACHESTON IS DOWN!
Roberts: Wow Carvanelie...she really doesn't like you huh?
Carvanelie: She's just on her period...ignore her. It's what I've done for months...
Downs: One of these days you son of a b*tch I will pull your balls out of your scrutum with a pair of pliers...
Layton is on his feet, and he salutes the fans again as they chant his name. Looking onto the announce table he grabs Louis' water, takes a swig...AND SPITS IT INTO ACHESTON'S FACE! Cyril's eyes are full of water, and Matthews takes the chance to hook him up, and drop him facefirst into the floor with the STO!
Acheston is reeling in the early going here...and now Matthews turns his attention to James Roberts at ringside! He gets in the former Universal Champion's face, and knocks his headset off...THEN SHOVES HIM OVER THE CROWD BARRIER! The fans behind the announce table look a little shocked to have an EWA superstar in their laps, but their mouths are about to open even further as from behind, Layton gets clobbered for the second time in the match with the World Of Pain title belt! Now Matthews topples over the barrier, and lands on top of Roberts, and both of them roll to the floor...as Acheston grabs the headset...
Acheston: So tell me Maura, are you enjoying Last Vengeance give Layton Matthews a valuable lesson in who the franchise players are in the EWA? You see this belt? It's the World Of Pain Championship belt...Pain is nothing but the currency Last Vengeance deal in. Debts are to be collected...Layton Matthews has decided he wants to learn the hard way...and so he ARRGGGHH
From behind Acheston, Matthews is up...AND HE'S WRAPPING THE CORD FROM HIS OWN HEADSET AROUND HIS THROAT! Acheston is struggling for breath...and now Layton is dragging him over the crowd barrier as well! By now security and crowd control have managed to clear an area around the three athletes lying prone on the concrete, but soon Layton Matthews is up, and he starts pulling Acheston to his feet...when he gets hit from behind with a low blow from James Roberts! Layton cries out in pain, and Roberts turns him round...THEN GIVES HIM THE LIVING NIGHTMARE RIGHT THERE IN THE CROWD!!
Layton Matthews is down...and now both members of Last Vengeance are stomping away at him! Boots, kicks and stomps rain down as Roberts and Acheston start to take liberties with him. The referee jumps the crowd barrier and tries desperately to maintain order, trying to push Roberts away...BUT OUT OF NOWHERE ROBERTS HEEL TRIPS HIM THEN PUTS HIM IN THE ANGEL LOCK! This is completely out of hand...it's a World Of Pain title match so the referee can't disqualify Cyril Acheston...AND NOW ROBERTS IS MAKING HIM TAP OUT!
Meanwhile Acheston continues the beatdown of Matthews, grabbing him by his tights and hurling him over the barrier...and onto the announce table! Layton Matthews has been chokeslammed in the crowd, and double teamed like hell, as well as taking numerous blows to the head and can barely move as he lies prone on the announce table. And now Acheston climbs onto the barrier, struggling for his balance until he grabs hold of Maura for support. She tries to shrug his arm away...but only manages to distract him from his purpose...AND NOW HE'S TRYING TO DRAG DOWNS UP ONTO THE ANNOUNCE TABLE WITH HIM! Last Vengeance are completely out of control here! James Roberts is still making the referee tap on the outside, whilst at the announce table...NO!! ACHESTON WANTS TO POWERBOMB MAURA!!
He holds her high into the air, getting ready to powerbomb her through Layton Matthews, and through the table...BUT THE SHOWCASE SUPERSTAR IS UP...AND HE JUST HIT ACHESTON IN THE BALLS! Layton pushes Maura into the first row (it's a softer landing than the announce table isn't it!) then clambers up onto the barrier...TO EVENFLOW DDT ACHESTON OFF IT...RIGHT THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE!!
Carvanelie: Urrrm...oh...oh God! Like...Acheston and Matthews are literally lying on my feet here, I don't know where Maura's gone...oh, hey Maura (as she struggles back over the barrier and looks through the wreckage to find her headset)...and in the crowd James Roberts has had the Angel Lock on Senior Referee Bill Morris for nearly five minutes!
Downs: THAT'S WHAT YOU GET YOU SON OF A B*TCH...YOU TRY AND F*CK WITH PEOPLE...SOONER OR LATER ONE OF THEM DDT'S YOU THROUGH A TABLE!!
Carvanelie: Would you sit down...you've interfered in this match enough already!
Downs: INTERFERED...YOU ASSHOLE!!
Maura slaps Louis hard in the face, as from behind them a referee is thrown high over the barrier and onto the other side. It's complete bedlam as James Roberts wraps a steel chair around the referee's leg and stomps down on it...whilst from the announce table, both Layton Matthews and Cyril Acheston crawl back towards the ring!
Somehow they both crawl back inside, and look at each other from all fours, dazed and confused looks on their faces, and only knowing one thing - the World Of Pain title is on the line! They get to their feet by some miracle, and exchange some absolutely feeble looking right hands. But suddenly Acheston blocks one of Layton's, and shoves him away...he looks for the Final Shot...but Layton blocks it...SHOWCASE FINALE!! Layton Matthews just knocked out the champion with his finishing move...AND NOW JAMES ROBERTS IS IN THE RING! He lifts Matthews onto his shoulders and looks to be preparing for the Death Sentence...but Layton rolls off the shoulders...SHOWCASE FINALE!!
Both Last Vengeance members are down!! Layton Matthews has knocked then both out with his devastating finishing move, the Showcase Finale...AND NOW THE LIGHTS HAVE GONE OUT!! What the hell is going on? The referee is down, Acheston and Roberts are down...Layton Matthews has had his bell rung so many times tonight he can barely see straight...and now every light in the arena has been killed!
R. Kelly's 'The World's Greatest' starts to play...and a spotlight shines on the ramp...AS A HUGE FIGURE RUNS THROUGH THE CROWD! He slides into the ring, and stands behind Layton, his eyes boring into the back of his head as finally the lights come on, and the music stops...
Downs: IT'S TORNADO!! TORNADO'S BACK IN THE EWA...AND HAS HE COME TO REJOIN HIS LAST VENGEANCE BUDDIES?
Carvanelie: HE HAS...HE HAS!!!
Carvanelie's screams come as Tornado spins Matthews round and kicks him low...THEN LIFTS HIM HIGH INTO THE AIR FOR THE TORNADO RIDE! Layton Matthews just hit the canvas with incredible velocity...AND TORNADO JUST DUMPED CYRIL ON TOP OF MATTHEWS!
The third member of Last Vengeance has caused yet more chaos in one of the most chaotic matches ever witnessed, and now he's going outside to bring the barely conscious referee in! Bill Morris' ankle is broken, and he can't walk, but he gets shoved under the ropes by Tornado...and he has no option but to count! (1...2...3!!)
Somehow Cyril is escaping from Boston with the World Of Pain title still around his waist...but it took three men to get it done!
Downs: This is despicable, Louis! Layton Matthews was fighting two guys out in the crowd for the whole match...you had James Roberts assaulting the referee the whole time...and by God Last Vengeance is back at full strength!
Carvanelie: Take a look at that sight, Maura! Cyril Acheston, James Roberts and Tornado...Last Vengeance ARE the EWA!
Downs: And Cyril Acheston is some how weaselling away from the Fleet Center with his title belt...Layton Matthews just got screwed!
The sight Louis was referring to was the three-strong Last Vengeance as all three man are finally back on their feet. Acheston still looks a little dazed, but he has the belt slung over his shoulder as Roberts and Tornado raise his hand. They turn to all four sides of the ring, holding their middle fingers up to the crowd, then simultaneously they all look down to the unconscious body of Layton Matthews in the centre of the ring, and hold their middle fingers towards him...AS 'THE PRISONER' STARTS TO PLAY!!!
The crowd blow the roof off the place as Thurman Skydive's music starts to play...AND HE APPEARS ON THE TRON...outside Boston Central Hospital??
Skydive: Hello boys! Looks like you're having fun without me there to kick your asses! Hey Acheston...well done on retaining in the title...I'm sure you're real proud. And Tornado...welcome back man! The EWA just hasn't been the same without your retarded, boneheaded, simpleton voice booming from TV sets everywhere we go. Anytime you want a vacation...like a permanent one or something...you let me know. It'd be for the good of the whole company I assure you!
But you know, it seems I was suspended because you guys were out of control. Now I'm no expert, but that match did not strike me as being particularly...controlled? Hell...you guys are the masters of anarchy and chaos right! So I tell you what...next week on Tsunami we're going to have ourselves a little Tag Title Tournament preview! We're going to see two of the favourite teams in the tournament go head-to-head...in like a warm up match. Next week in Missouri it'll be you Acheston, and you Tornado...in a Kansas City Street Fight...against Layton Matthews...AND THE PERSON I JUST HELPED GET OUT OF THE HOSPITAL TO KICK YOUR ASSES!!
With that Rammstein's 'Sonne' starts to play again...AND LUCRETIA BLACK IS LOWERING HERSELF FROM THE CEILING AGAIN!! She wields a Singapore Cane menacingly, ripping the protective collar away from her neck and throwing it into the crowd. Finally she touches down in the ring. Her music cuts out...AND LAST VENGEANCE SCATTER! Roberts and Tornado make it out of the ring, but Acheston gets caught by the tights...AND TURNED STRAIGHT INTO A CANE SHOT!! The force of the blow send him flying over the top rope, and he lands at the feet of his two friends, who help him up the ramp as 'Sonne' starts to play again...
Downs: What an announcement from Thurman Skydive! Next week it'll be the Dying Breed and Last Vengeance in a Kansas City Street Fight...and that'll be just six days before Adrenaline Rush!!
Carvanelie: Damnit Skydive...you're suspended tonight! You're not allowed here!
Downs: He's not here...he's still serving out the terms of his suspension! He's not in the Fleet Center tonight...but he did help get Ms Black out of hospital in time for her to get back here...
Carvanelie: Oh whoopee...what is it with those two anyway. I swear Pitt's trying to get herself favourable treatment with her little friendship with Skydive...and it sucks!
Downs: What sucks is being Cyril Acheston and Tornado next week in Kansas City when they're in the fight of their lives!!
The show goes to the final commercial break with a shot of Ms Black nodding her thanks to Skydive on the Tron, then bending down and tending to Layton, who's still barely moved since he was blindsided by Tornado...
Thurman Skydive & EWA Presents... Adrenaline Rush Bradley Center, Milwaukee WI 18th August 2003
On Your Own
Back from commercials, and we're in the corridor approaching the arena. Davlin McCaine is in focus, flanked, as usual, by The Xecutioner and Susie Vixen. All three have calm, but concentrated looks on their faces. Gone is the arrogant Davlin, or the jokey Davlin...McCaine tonight is all business. He knows there's just one match between him and a US Title shot. Water drips down from his hair and a he throws a few punches into the air...and lightly clips EWA Owner Mike Victory in the chest...
Victory: Davlin...it's good to see you're so focused for this match. This rivalry between yourself and The Butcher for the past month has set the wrestling world alight. You've really brought a lot of the spotlight onto the EWA...I'd like to congratulate and thank you for it...
McCaine (confused by Victory's motives): Urrrm...thanks...Mr Victory...
Victory: But tonight, Davlin, this rivaly, it comes to an end. You guys leave it all in the ring tonight, and when it's all said and done there will be just one man going through to face James Roberts in the final of the US Title Tournament...
McCaine: I know Mr Victory...
Victory: Just one more thing Davlin...your friends...they're banned from ringside...
McCaine (enraged): WHAT!
Victory: Tonight, in your match...anything goes. Orange Bullet is there only to count the fall. You and Butcher can do anything you want to. It's the only way to settle the score between you two...but between you two ALONE! Have a good match...and you two (to Xecutioner and Susie)...if I see you two out there...I'll have both kicked out of the building, and banned from Extreme Wrestling Action permanently...
Victory walks past the trio and up the corridor, probably returning to his Skybox to watch the Main Event. He leaves behind him an incredulous looking Davlin McCaine, who's eyes are swimming in his head, struggling to regain his focus, just minutes before the biggest match of his EWA v2.0 career...
Coming Soon...
Right before we go to ringside for the Main Event, we get a highlight package, showing explosive clips from a variety of promotions, and of a variety of high-risk, dazzling offence. Never once to see see the executors face...and finally the package fades to black, leaving the caption...
US Title Tournament Decider The Butcher vs Davlin McCaine Orange Bullet Special Referee
'In Da Club' plays through the arena, and up the steps onto the stage comes Davlin McCaine. His gameface is on again after the altercation in the corridor, and he shakes his head, slapping his temples and psyching himself one final time before making his way down the ramp, nodding his head in time to both the music and the deafening 'DAVLIN...DAVLIN' chant. Sliding under the ropes, he doesn't hit the turnbuckles, and there's no posturing or posing for the fans. He just leans into the ropes a couple of times, then beckons for Butcher to come out. The only time the trademark Davlin smile comes out is when 'Kill You' finally starts to play and Butcher walks out onto the stage...
Downs: Davlin is more focused on this match than for any other I've ever seen, Louis. After that bloodbath last week he's absolutely desperate for revenge...
Carvanelie: Davlin McCaine is the best in this business right now. There ain't no chance in hell Butcher can win this...and he has the added distraction of knowing that he has to team with Nightengale in the Tag Team Tournament...it's not like...speak of the devil!!
Butcher's music is still playing as he steps into the ring, and out onto the stage walks Shadow and Nightengale. They have chairs with them, and they set them up on the stage, sitting down and apparently getting ready to watch Butcher wrestle McCaine from there rather than the back. McCaine and Butcher face off against each other, but the crowd are vehemently chanting 'WE WANT ORANGE'...and almost on cue his music hits, and the ring lights turn orange! The pop is thunderous as Orange Bullet walks out onto the stage, shooting a sideways glance and Nightengale and Shadow, then pulling a black and white striped shirt over his orange mask and hitting the ring, going to the ropes to salute the fans...AS IN THE RING BUTCHER AND DAVLIN ARE UNDERWAY! Orange Bullet is still on the ropes, thinking the deafening ovation is for him, but by this point the crowd's attention is thoroughly on the action...AND BUTCHER SCORES THE FIRST KNOCKDOWN OF THE CONTEST WITH A SHOULDER TACKLE!
McCaine is up in a flash, and he runs through Butcher's legs, then gets up to dropkick him in the back of the neck. He staggers forward into the ropes, then comes back into a roll-up...and Orange Bullet is still milking the cheers which he thinks are for him!
McCaine is livid, and he pulls Bullet down from the ropes and slaps him in the face! He berates him furiously for not being there to count the fall, and he doesn't realise Butcher is on his feet. Butcher lifts McCaine's arm from behind, and drops him with a belly to back suplex. McCaine crashes shoulders and neck first, and his legs then fold him up like a piece of paper. That was some serious offence, and McCaine is already having to shake cobwebs loose as he springs up again. Butcher smiles for a second, then shoots off as stiff a right hand as you're ever going to see, and McCaine shoots back against the turnbuckle. Now Butcher goes low, driving the shoulders into the abdomen...until McCaine lifts his feet up...and catches Butcher in a roll-up. This time Bullet is in place to count...but he doesn't even get one before Butcher has kicked out.
The crowd has cheered the opening few minutes almost non-stop, and don't show any signs of cooling off as the two men get to their feet and go into a lock-up. Butcher has the obvious strength advantage here, and he immediately reaches between McCaine's legs and slams him hard into the mat. Davlin takes the hit, and slams his hands against the canvas, knowing that he can't get into the situation where Butcher can use his strength against him. He gets to his feet again, and feigns the intention to lock up again, but this time kicks Butcher in the stomach, then grabs his arm, wrenching it tight, then drilling a couple of elbows into it.
Butcher rides it out, rolling through the pressure in the end, finally pulling McCaine into a hammerlock. Davlin ducks underneath and puts Butcher into a hammerlock...but soon gets put right back into one himself. He reaches back, holding Butcher's head, then finally breaking the hold with a snapmare. Butcher sits up on the mat AND DAVLIN KICKS HIM HARD IN THE SPINE!!
The impact reverberates around the Fleet Center, prompting a huge 'WOOOOO' from the fans, almost like a knife-edge chop. Butcher holds his back in pain, but quickly rolls up onto his feet...AND ALMOST TAKES DAVLIN'S HEAD OFF WITH A CLOTHESLINE! These two are just getting stiffer and stiffer with everything they do, and the crowd are loving it. Somehow (after that clothesline) Davlin, starry-eyed and all, gets to his feet. It's obvious that clothesline had a serious effect though, as he swings at nothing but air, then gets pressed into the air by Butcher...then dropped over the top turnbuckle for some snake-eyes...then gets clotheslined to the outside!
Downs: It might have been a little obvious, but there's no way Davlin can just go hold for hold and toe-to-toe with Butcher. Butcher is too big and too technically sound to be out-wrestled by Davlin in that way.
Carvanelie: Don't question his logic...the man's a genius!
Downs: And I've been doing this for a long damn time, and I'm telling you he cannot beat Butcher purely on the mat. He's outside the ring right now because he tried to do it, got out-wrestled, then out-powered, and then out of the ring. He needs to go for high-impact and speed...
The only high-impact and speed in Davlin's right now are the remnants of that clothesline, and after hitting the floor hard, he got up quickly, but is now leaning on the ring apron, breathing deeply. But Butcher's ready to begin a fresh offensive, and he slingshots off the ropes, looking for a baseball slide...but Davin moves out of the way! The crowd pop for that, then explode as McCaine pulls Butcher all the way out of the ring...and whips him hard into the steps! Butcher crumples down, breathing hard and wincing in pain...as Davlin runs at him extending into a dropkick...RIGHT IN THE FACE! Butcher's head was caught between Davlin's boots and the steps then, and the results weren't pretty!
He gets to his feet, feeling his face to check if all its components are still in the right places. Meanwhile Davlin has pulled out a fire extinguisher from under the ring...AND HE LETS OFF A JET RIGHT IN BUTCHER'S FACE! Butcher staggers forward...right into a Russian legsweep to the ground! That looked like it hurt, and McCaine has no intention of letting up yet. He dumps the ring bell from the small timekeeper's table, then rests it squarely over Butcher's chest. The New Talent now climbs to the apron, points his middle fingers at Butcher...BEFORE DIVING OFF INTO AN ELBOW DROP...SMASHING THE SMALL TABLE OVER BUTCHER'S RIBS!
Butcher has been knocked for a loop, and is having problems sucking in oxygen. Now he lies on all fours, trying to regain his breath...with his head right over the ring bell! Davlin climbs up onto the barrier (the barriers are popular tonight apparently) THEN DROPS A LEG FROM IT! Butcher's face just got grinded against the bell, and even Orange Bullet, who, to his credit, is keeping a keen eye on the match, winces at that one.
He tries to tell Davlin to lighten up and get it back in the ring, but McCaine just shoves him aside and throws the apron up, dragging out a table and sliding it into the ring, getting a big pop from the crowd. But he doesn't look like using that quite yet, as he now sets to work on hauling up the steps, and making towards Butcher with the upper half of them. Butcher leans against the side of the ring, the bell having taken a lot out of him. McCaine looks to launch the steps at him...but Butcher moves away...AND THE ROPES CATAPULT THE STEPS RIGHT BACK AT DAVLIN! The point of those steps caught him right on the top of his forehead there...and it's busted him open a little! There's definitely some blood coming down his head there...AND BUTCHER'S LIKE A GREAT WHITE SHARK!
He sprints at McCaine, shoving him down then working him over with a series of hard shots, right to the forehead, trying desperately to open up that cut some more. He pulls McCaine up by the hair...AND HIS HEAD MAKES A DULL THUD ON THE RINGPOST! A swelling appears almost immediately after doing that, and Butcher rolls Davlin into the ring, and covers him hopefully (1...2...no chance yet!)
Davlin isn't moving anywhere at any great speed right now, and Butcher has time to roll out of the ring, and pull the timekeeper out of his chair by his suit jacket, then take the chair out from under him, throwing him hard back into the ground.
Back into the ring he goes, as McCaine uses the ropes to get to his feet...AND HE GETS A SHOT WITH THE METAL CHAIR RIGHT ON THE BUTTON! Davlin goes down in a heap, and Butcher covers again (1...2...again Davlin kicks out quickly!) He just took a chair to the face, opening the cut up on his forehead a little more, but he still wasn't even close to being put away yet. He gets dragged back to his feet by Butcher, who positions him over the steel chair...THEN DROPS HIM ONTO IT WITH A NECKBREAKER! There's no way that one didn't hurt, and Butcher rolls into a cover for the third time (1...2...Thrr Nope!)
McCaine kicks out again, and Butcher's notorious temper is starting to glair up again! Davlin's resilience is a frustration, and he picks up the chair again, almost looking at it like it's the one to blame for Davlin's insolence! AND HE'S PUNISHING THE CHAIR BY HITTING IT AGAINST DAVLIN AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN! Davlin McCaine is getting hammered like the proverbial railroad spike by Butcher and that chair...AND FINALLY ORANGE BULLET PUTS A STOP TO IT!
As Butcher reaches back for another shot, Bullet pulls the chair from his hands, and drops it to the mat, shaking his head and telling Butcher enough is enough...AND BUTCHER PUNCHES HIM IN THE FACE! Orange Bullet is an EWA veteran, and The Butcher just gave him a knuckle sandwich...AND BULLET IS BACK IN HIS FACE! He scores with a couple of right hands...AND DAVLIN CAPITALISES BY PULLING BUTCHER OVER INTO A SCHOOLBOY...AND NOW BULLET ISN'T COUNTING!
He refuses to count a pinfall which he was partially responsible for...AND NOW McCAINE GIVES HIM A SHOT! And again Orange Bullet comes right back, swinging with big rights and big chops for all he's worth. He backs Davlin into the corner...AND THEN THEY BOTH GET FLATTENED BY CHAIRSHOTS FROM BUTCHER! He throws the chair down in a rage, and raises his arms to the sky, looking down at the two men at his feet and screaming at them!
Downs: Butcher has lost it, Louis!
Carvanelie: And what was Orange Bullet doing attacking Davlin like that??
Downs: Your ridiculous line of bull is really starting to get to me Louis...both competitors attacked Bullet first...he's just counting the pin falls in this one! That's all Victory hired him to do!
Carvanelie: Yet he's not counting when Davlin is pinning Butcher apparently?
Downs: That was the right call under the circumstances and you full well know it...and now what is Butcher doing?
Butcher has set up Orange Bullet's head, balancing it on the bottom rope, and he now stands over him, raising the point of the chair...NO, HE'S GOING TO BRING IT DOWN AND BREAK BULLET'S NECK! He raises the chair...AS DAVLIN COMES FROM THE TOP ROPE...AND HE KICKS THE CHAIR INTO BUTCHER'S FACE! A second later and Bullet would've been going out of here in a wheelchair, and as Butcher staggers backwards into the ropes, Davlin charges at him...AND SPEARS HIM THROUGH THE ROPES! Both men hit the ground on the outside...and they're still rolling on top of each other slugging away! The blood is starting to flow more freely from Davlin's opened up forehead now, but it's him that gets the upper hand. He reaches under the ring...and comes out with a handful of powder. He yells at Butcher to get up...THEN THROWS IT ALL IN HIS FACE...AND BUTCHER'S TEMPORARILY BLINDED!
Now reaching into the ring, Davlin pulls the table to the outside...AND HE USES IT TO GUILLOTINE BUTCHER WITH! He just through the table, it's edge pressed against Butcher's neck, into the ground. Butcher can hardly breathe, and he's still having problems seeing, as Davlin pulls another chair from under the ring, and with an evil look on his face...HE HITS BUTCHER IN THE BACK WITH IT! Butcher gets to his feet, flexing his spine in pain. Now Davlin reaches to the wreckage of Downs and Carvanelie's announce table, and pulls out their only working monitor. Butcher staggers forward AND TAKES THE MONITOR TO THE FOREHEAD!
And now Butcher's bleeding as well, and he's trying to use the blood to get some of the powder from his eyes...like that's going to work! McCaine drops the monitor onto the ground, then hooks up Butcher...AND SUPLEXES HIM ONTO IT! THE MONITOR'S BEEN CRUSHED, AND WHO KNOWS WHAT DAMAGE HAS BEEN DONE TO BUTCHER'S BACK!
He isn't moving...and now Davlin's setting that table up on the outside! This is not going to pretty, and he gives it a knowing pat as he leaves it. He now drags Butcher up, and puts him on the table...before pointing to the top rope!! The crowd, who have been solidly behind Davlin all match aren't relenting now, and they just go nuts as he climbs up, and stands poised to put Butcher through the...WHO ARE THOSE GUYS??
Two men just jumped over the barriers from the crowd from either side. AND ONE MAN JUST CRACKED BUTCHER IN HIS PRONE STOMACH WITH A BASEBALL BAT! Now he drags him off the table, then DDT's him onto the floor...AND THE OTHER GUYS IS ON THE APRON BEHIND DAVLIN...HE'S PUSHING HIM OFF THE TOP!!! OH MY GOOOOOOOD!! DAVLIN CRASHED THROUGH THE TABLE!!
The crowd have absolutely no idea what's going on, and the two men exchange a high five on the outside...AS ORANGE BULLET CLIMBS TO THE TOP ROPE! The special referee is back, and he's just seen two men beat the crap out of McCaine and Butcher...AND HE JUMPS INTO A CORKSCREW SOMERSAULT SENTON AT THEM...BUT THEY AVOID THE CONTACT! The fans are in shock, but still get their 'HOLY SH*T' chant in for that one. And now the two men slowly walk up the ramp. They walk up the ramp now, and come face-to-face with Shadow and Nightengale! AND NOW THEY'RE IN A SLUGOUT UP THERE...SIMULTANEOUS DDT'S ONTO THE RAMP!! The two mysterious intruders have just left five men unconscious! They laugh to each other, then touch knuckles, before turning back to the fans, and they pull off their jackets...THEY'RE WEARING AWA T-SHIRTS...AND ONE OF THEM HAS THE AWA WORLD TITLE AROUND HIS WAIST!
Downs: It's...no...IT CAN'T BE! THE SUICIDE KINGS...THE AWA WORLD CHAMPION, ALAN FISCUS AND JAKE JARVIS...THEY'VE JUST INVADED THE EWA!!
Carvanelie: Invaded the EWA, they've just destroyed our main event and left five men in serious need of medical attention!
Downs: And look at Fiscus, he's got that AWA World title around his waist...damnit why are they even here? They're not on our roster...they should be XWA guys now!
Carvanelie: The AWA just invaded our freakin' Main Event...and damnit they put Davlin through a table!
Downs: Well at least the Suicide Kings have left ringside at last...and how the hell is this match supposed to continue with the referee, the competitors and two guys who frankly have no business even being out here all down?
Carvanelie: DAVLIN'S MOVING!!
He's right! Somehow Davlin McCaine is crawling from the remnants of the table he'd set out to put Butcher through, and he has nothing but the instinct to get back into the ring. He's been trained all his life to re-enter the ring to avoid getting counted out, and even though there's no-one in sight to count him out, he rolls under the ropes, and lies flat-out on the canvas, breathing heavily, and clearing some of the blood that is starting to coagulate in his eyes...
Meanwhile on the outside, Butcher is far more aware than he's letting on! He is looking around, and finally find what he was looking for - the steel chair that Davlin had previously nailed him in the back with. Climbing onto the ring apron now, he goes to the top rope...AND JUMPS OFF!!! HE HITS THE MOST AMAZING 300+ LBS FROG SPLASH...and Davlin McCaine just got squashed like a bug! Butcher moves the chair aside, and holding his ribs he hooks the leg...and there's no-one to count the fall! He looks around in desperation, and sees Orange Bullet still laid out on the outside following his death-defying aerial assault attempt at the Suicide Kings a couple of minutes earlier. Butcher has a look of desparation on his face...but a referee is sprinting towards the ring from the locker room!!
He slides under the ropes and prepares to count (1...2...Thrrr NO!!) HOW THE HELL DID DAVLIN KICK OUT OF THAT?? He still doesn't look awake even now, but he had enough about him to get the shoulder up...and now what! Butcher is enraged! He thought that was three, and he is telling the referee that in no uncertain terms! His eyes are wide in fury, and he lifts the referee onto his shoulders...NOT THE BUTCHER'S BLADE!!
He's fixing to give a referee the Butcher's Blade...BUT ORANGE BULLET IS BACK IN THE RING! He pulls the referee off Butcher's shoulders...AND NOW BUTCHER WANTS BULLET!! He lifts the Orange one onto his shoulders, screaming in fury...AND TURNING STRAIGHT INTO DAVLIN...TALENT DROP!!! Davlin McCaine just hit his finishing move...AND ORANGE BULLET'S PREPARING TO COUNT (1...2...3!!)
IT'S OVER...DAVLIN'S GOING TO ADRENALINE RUSH!!
Downs: Against all the odds...Davlin McCaine has hit his Talent Drop...and even without Xecutioner and Susie Vixen, he's got the victory! He's going to face James Roberts at Adrenaline Rush live on pay-per-view...and what a classic that 3/5 falls match will be!
Carvanelie: I'm...I'm all choked up Maura! All along I've been telling you Davlin McCaine is going to win this thing...psychotic Butcher or not! And right here, right now, you just saw the settling of this unbelievable rivalry - and Davin came out on top!
Downs: But there are still so many what if's Louis. What if the Suicide Kings hadn't got involved here tonight? What if Orange Bullet hadn't been drafed into referee...
Carvanelie: If Bullet wasn't refereeing...he wouldn't be doing that right now!!
'In Da Club' is playing again, and the crowd are absolutely going batsh*t in celebration, as a bloody Davlin McCaine progresses to the final of the United States title tournament. Orange Bullet raises his arm to the sky, then rolls out of the ring, tagging a few hands as he heads off to the locker room. Past him on the ramp come Nightengale and Shadow, who drag their man out of the ring and help him walk that same path up the ramp...
Downs: Cometh the hour...cometh the AWA...cometh Orange Bullet's officiating...but cometh Davlin McCaine! Ladies and Gentlemen...it's James Roberts and Davlin McCaine going 3/5 Falls for the US title at Adrenaline Rush...
Carvanelie: That's going to be a great match Maura!
Downs: I rather suspect it will be...but we've got next Tuesday in Kansas City to go first! Our final stop off en-route to Milwaukee will be in the Kemper Arena...and we'll see a Kansas City Street Fight! Cyril Acheston and the returning Tornado of Last Vengeance clash with The Dying Breed...
Carvanelie: No secrets who you're pulling for huh?
Downs: Oh I can't wait to see them get their asses kicked...and Malinko will be back in action...ahem...next week as well! But from Tsunami here live in Boston, MA...DAVLIN McCAINE IS GOING TO ADRENALINE RUSH!
Carvanelie: You got to say that line like three times...you could've let me do it...at least one or something!
Tsunami goes off the air with shots of Davlin on the turnbuckles, celebrating is victory, as on the stage, being supported by Shadow and Nightengale, Butcher watches at him, shaking his head...
Credits: Same Old... - Al Goodwin Noises In The Dark - Adam Mason Nightengale vs Trill vs Erik Dean vs Smoke - Adam Mason Lucretia Black vs Caveman - Al Goodwin (promo by Sam Smarts) Ambulance - Al Goodwin Pain Express vs Dr Mental - Al Goodwin You're In...You're Both In - Al Goodwin Cyril Acheston vs Layton Matthews - Al Goodwin On Your Own - Al Goodwin Coming Soon - Al Goodwin The Butcher vs Davlin McCaine - Al Goodwin
