I pledge of allegiance.... - What's the matter with people these days?! They are just stabbing not just a person ... but MILLIONS in the back! In the EWA I see it happen almost spontaneously after the forming of Team Ballz went down, and I think its downright disgusting! Yes, they were BORN in the good ole' U of of A, and now they badmouth it. If you think about it ... why not just buy a house up in Canada or India or something?! That'll fit you people better since all you do is whine about how America is garbage and trash. I for one, am PROUD to call myself an American citizen! America sets the standards, it may have become raunchy in places, but what's the matter with that?! Its EXCITEMENT! Up in the Great White North what do you think they do for fun?? I can picture the Canadians waking up every morning, grabbing their binoculars and just watching their surroundings ... of course Canada is beautiful! Does anything exciting ever happen there? HELL NO! So Mr. DFA wants to turn his back on HIS country, then he can go right ahead and start packing' because he's a disgrace! The man was once one of the biggest faces in the game but he had to throw it all away, selfish ... greedy ... bastard. The fuchsia and aqua colours are no more, it may be sad, but its the truth. Notice how I spelled it in the Canadian Fashion, why? Because now the EWA is becoming more Canadian than ever, so why not begin to fit in? BECAUSE I'M AMERICAN! SCREW YOU HOSERS!

The True American Hero?! - Independence Day! Its all about the BBQ's BABY! But what made it even more exciting for some, that this years Fourth Of July set on a Tuesday ... which means ... you get to blow a finger off ... and then watch EWA's Tuesday Night Heat in the waiting room of a hospital! But on last weeks heat among all the excitement, a surprising change of events took place. Suddenly the arena blacked out, and a logo up on the EWA big screen suddenly formed..... "On July 30th, A True American Will Return. Touchdown to Groundzero." Now, who is this so-called American Hero?? And how big of an impact will he have on the EWA?? It must be pretty big if it interrupted the show two times.... I'll keep you posted on further developments....

An open invitation..... - Readers, do you realize my unhappiness yet?? Do you think I should be forced to write this God awful thing every damn week and have nothing to look forward to?? I NEED AN INSPIRATION! This dead end job is going nowhere, I need to have a bigger impact on the EWA and I know just the right way to do that. Ya see, every week I see these wrestlers coming out here and it makes me kinda sad, a while ago... I was telling THEM what to do! Some of these guys were even in the old 420 Degrees Federation. But let me get to the point, I'm sick of falling asleep halfway through Tuesday Night Heat! Yes, there is those other stables out there right now like Fu Man Crew, they are damn funny ... but stale after while. Team Ballz... they are full of themselves. What the EWA needs is one of those old school stables, who are just out to basically DOMINATE! A group of powerful men who got each others backs. Yes, the idea never really took off... Counterfeit Promotions never got off its feet. But now I have the chance to turn it around and give it another chance ... but its not in my hands ... oh no, its up to one man to lead my army ... my Corporate Cruiserweight..... Thorn! So Thorn, what will it be?? I'll give you a week to give me a response..... I'll be waiting.....

Shedding some light on "The Dark Secret" - Its been about two months since we last seen or heard from Nick Diamante on EWA television. He promised to quit wrestling if Chandler had beaten him in the legendary "I Respect You" match, and that's exactly what happened. Nick wished the EWA good luck and sadly left our television sets. My "sources" tell me that they've seen Nick Diamante hitting the gym at 6am everyday religiously and is working himself into tremendous condition. But what for? Is this a sign of things to come?

Is it just me, or is the EWA becoming more and more overcrowded?

There's been a big rumor on the Internet that Zed has crossed the border down to Mexico and married Santoro.

Ethan Tyler ... and you thought War Cryme was a break out star!

The animal protection agency are already on our case about the use of scorpions in the Divine/Cody Covington death match.

At first, the Cows in Black were unique ... but now they are starting to become utterly irritating.

First there is Rocky Blonde Bars ... how does Tom Stone cologne sound to you??

Someone ... ANYONE! I beg of you ... put The Wildman out of his misery!

The Madman will be out for a while, no sweat off my balls. The guy receives the Chris Watkins "Idiot of the WEEK!" Award for that little diss he had for aWa. I guess making the guy, giving him a chance, and getting him noticed wasn't good enough for him.