HomeHis wide-eyed face peered at me from over a bowl of flaky goodness on the front of a box of LIFE cereal. He was frozen in the shot � his arm was caught in mid-air holding up a spoonful of the lovely crunchies. At the bottom corner of the box was a neon advertisement for (gasp!) a plastic Mighty Mouse bowl and spoon set. A mere three UPC symbols cut from the boxes of LIFE cereal would guarantee me that priceless treasure.
I imagined myself sitting in some gorgeous breakfast nook of a huge mansion, eating golden LIFE flakes from an enchanted, gold rimmed Mighty Mouse bowl. My sister would climb over to my side and beg me pitiously for a glimpse of my famed bowl. I might indulge her with a peek every now and then, but there would be no question as to who's bowl it was.
My eyes grew wide with excitement. I yanked at the hem of my mother�s skirt to catch her attention. She was inspecting some ultra-nutritious organic cereal on the highest shelf at the market. �What is it?� she said sternly. �You see something you want?� I pointed with great enthusiasm to the white rectangular box with the contrasting primary colored letters.
�Mikey,� I managed to squeak out as I began to hyperventilate. �He likes it. I like it.� I pointed to the box.
My mother turned her nose up at my suggestion. �It�s got too much sugar,� she complained. �How about some nice oat bran instead?�
�MIKEY!� I repeated, a little more assertively this time. �It�s okay. He likes it.� I began to jump around and chant my hero�s name. �Mikey. Mikey. Mikey.� My younger sister joined in on the chant and our cries turned quickly into shrill screams that prevented the grocery clerks from broadcasting their requests for price checks over the loudspeaker. My mother quickly grabbed the box off the shelf and whisked us towards the checkout.
I couldn�t wait to indulge in Mikey�s morning meal, so I managed to convince my parents to let me eat cereal that night for dinner. Never did cereal smell so delicious in a newly-opened box. Never did the ringing of flakes against a ceramic bowl sound so melodious. Mikey liked it. Never was a child so happy to finally mash a crop of dried wheat flakes into her mouth � until her taste buds were allowed to enter in on the transaction. I gagged and spit out the first mouthful. It was hideously sugary, but otherwise bland. Mikey liked this?
Normally, I would have boycotted the entire brand for the rest of my life, but I knew that there was one Mighty Mouse bowl set that needed to be liberated from the factory. I ate that monstrous concoction day in and day out until I finished each box. MIKEY liked it. This was no small feat, as my mother insisted on purchasing only the economy, family size box in absolute fear that she wouldn�t get the best value on a smaller package.
By the end of three finished boxes � Mom wouldn�t let me cut out the UPC symbols from the box before the cereal was completely eaten � I gathered together three dollars, for postage and handling, and the three symbols and sealed them in an envelope. I was so proud that day for my accomplishment, and relieved that I�d be able to finally have some oat bran after several weeks of LIFE cereal. Mikey must have had his taste buds removed at some point, I was sure.
I�m not sure what happened after that. Either the postman pocketed my three-dollar bills (I didn�t know about checks and money orders when I was six), or I thought that the money would cover the postage of the envelope I was sending (didn't learn about postage until I was seven), but I never did see my sought-after prize. I moved onto Chex, mainly because Snoopy was their spokesperson, after that.