"I thought I knew all about
emotional expression and emotional control
until I entered this initiation. Now I find that what came before was baby
stuff.
"I feel like the fish in my cup, out of my element, and not sure I'll
survive. I am working to identify and deal with my emotions. My teachers,
the King and Queen, call this differentiation. Alchemists considered it a
crucial early stage in the process of turning base materials into gold.
Right now I'm not sure they'll ever get any gold out of me! Looking back
at how innocently and confidently I began to follow this path, I almost
have to laugh.
"Recognizing and understanding emotions is never simple. There are some
pretty murky depths to muddle through. I'm certainly not used to the
intensity. I didn't even know I had some of those feelings. Sometimes I'm
so overwhelmed by them that I feel as if I'm drowning.
"My key phrase is
the complexity of emotions."
