Jokes
Ok, ok , I know
some of you may have heard some of these before, but, hey, tough!
Hey fiddle fiddle
the cat done a piddle
all over the bathroom mat.
The little dog laughed
to see such fun
so he peed all over the cat.
While sitting on a toilet the old man said to himself:
Here I sit broken hearted
I paid my penny and I only farted
Mary had a little lamb,
It's name was little Ralph,
Now Ralph is on a pyre,
Because he caught Foot and Mouth.
Mary had a little lamb,
It's fleece was white and whispy.
It caught Foot and mouth today,
And now it black and crispy.
Mary had a little lamb,
she tied it to a pylon.
10,000 volts went up it's bum
and turned it's wool to nylon.
Mary had a little sheep
with her one night, it went to sleep.
The sheep turned out be a ram,
now Mary has a little lamb.
Mary had a little lamb
she kept it in a bucket
and every time the lamb jumped out,
the bull dog tried to ... put it back in again
Mary had a little lamb
she kept it as a pet
And when the price of meat went up
she ate the little get.
Mary had a little lamb
the butcher chopped it dead,
she took it to school the next day
between two hunks of bread.
I'm a little tea - pot
short and silly.
Here's my handle
here's my willy.
When the tea is ready
hear me hiss.
Lift me up and watch me p**s.
Georgie Porgie pudding and pie.
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play
He kissed them too, cos he's funny that
way.
There was a young lady from Gloucester,
whose parents thought they had lost her.
From the fridge came a sound
and at last she was found.
The trouble was - how to defrost her.
