Suddenly one day, all I had ever wanted disappeared...
It seems like everything in this world hates me...
-Shinhwa
4:39 PM
Okay, I'm off Shinhwa now. =pouts= Kazaore made me. =glares at Kazaore who has the Shinhwa cds and mp3s= He says he'll destroy them if I don't listen to something else. ;_; But I like Shinhwa! =pouts some more= Ah well. So! I went to sleep at 5 yesterday... Eh hee hee hee. ^^;;; So! Anyway, I'm listening to the new Linkin Park cd instead. You know what? I can't play this thing out of order because it'd screw up the cd! Woaw. I thoguht I'd never find a cd like that but this thing really flows. Ooooooo. But! I still wanna listen to Shinhwa. =pouts= He'll let me listen to my Hyesung talking clips, but that's because he knows I can't listen to that a million times. Stupid Kazaore. So anyway, gonna go now. I've been procrastinating too much on my hw so i don't have much of it done. >.<
Music: Shinhwa - Yo!
Blurb:Kazaore-san and Kotori-san don't like boy bands. =cackles= Poor them. I must corrupt them...
4:47 PM
Fixed some coding errors and uploaded the entire fixed site. Bah. In case you didn't notice, the left blog column was inconsistent with the rest of the site and with the desktop pic. ^^;;; I got lazy somewhere in there. Hee hee hee. It was perfectly fine of my offline site. ^^;;;; Ah well. Geez. When I redo my site theme, I'm going to make everything lowercase. Bah. Makes my life harder when I captialize things. But hey! I got new glasses so I'm horribly dizzy. Hoeeeee... But! The doctor put contacts in my eyes! So I'm getting contaxcts. Actually, I have them right now, but they are regular ones. The ones I need (for astigmatism) cost more and I just want ones to practice on. Heh... I hope I can put them in. He said it was okay to rub my eyes. And I took them out myself! Yay! It's still cool talking them out. Putting them in is still no fun tho... Bah. Bah. Contacts! You know what? I'm very vain. =cackles= Extremely. Hyesung is cute! Yeeee! =drools= Yes, it's all random right now because I have a mild headache. Phooey. But I can see! Miracle! But now my vision is worse than Mom's bad ne? i'll be blind by 30 if I don't get contacts soon. Once I get used to soft contacts I'm moving to hard ones. And once I get used to those I'll see if I can get the corrective contacts. Hopefully, but I think it's too late for me. =pouts= But! Hyesung is cute and the Linkin Park cd is cool! Ees all good! =grins=
Wanna pic? Sure, look!
BUT HE ALWAYS LOOKS KAWAII!!!!!! ^^^^^^^^^!!!!!!! =cackles maniacly=
4:36 PM
Went shopping! New cds for meee!!!!!! I got the Gladiator Soundtrack, the new HP soundtrack, Trans-Siberian Orchestra and!!!! Linkin Park's Reanimation!!!!! W00t!!! Yeeeah! Super spiffy! Dunno why you guys didn't want to buy it. =shrugs= I think it's cool so... Ah hee anyway! But dun worry peoples, I still lurv me Shinhwa cd! =giggles madly= I love music. I don't understand how anyone can live without music. Music is the best.
Pathetic.
No it's not. You're not helping her, you're making it worse.
What am I supposed to say> "Awww poor Ani, it's going to be okay. And when it falls apart again, it'll be fine later. You just have to wait for an eternity."
Stop being so melodramatic. She'll move on. This will help her grow.
That's what all the puny morons say. "Oh no! Someone's trying to kill me! Oh well. If I let them kill me, God'll send me to heaven. It was meant to be." You people make me sick.
We do not do that. If someone was trying to kill me, I'd run.
But admit it, you'd think it was a trial from God.
Yes... So?
=sneers= Well listen up loser, God doesn't exist. You'll have to get used to it. You have to control your own fate. You can't just sit around and cry about it. Get up and move on.
Crying heals.
A pathetic excuse for weakness. If you truely were intelligent, you'd realize you're wasting your time crying. You don't get anything accomplished crying.
Crying heals the soul
You have got to be kidding me. You actually beleive that? Or are you just desperate for an excuse?
...
Where's the proof? Does it really help or did society just make you think that way? Break away Kotori-san. You're holding her back.
It's you who's holding her back
We'll see.
Music: Shinhwa - Yo!
Blurb: All better now. See? I can even smile! ^^ So! The song title sounds horribly corny, but the song is cool. This is my second favorite Shinhwa mv. It almost made me cry. It was so depressing. Everytime I hear the song I can see the mv. Gods it was depressing. I wish I could post mvs but I can't. =pouts= But Neko-chan, you seriously need to watch it. I'll let you borrow it on Monday. I didn't give it to you on Tuesday because I wanted to watch it over the holiday.
Apologies for the typos. I'm in no mood to read through my entry and see how confusing and random it is.
Ayumi Hamasaki - I Am: Cool song ne? Lurv eet! Pheweee!!! My second favorite Ayumi song after Evolution. =cackles=
Akino Arai - Kanaete: DON'T YOU LOVE IT!!!! Omg! Coolest song in the world! Yeeeeeeeee!!!!!
And now, since I'm in a Shinhwa happy day, I have some really cool Shinhwa songs, sadly in wma form. I would convert itto mp3 but it's been horribly compressed so the sound's all bass-less and changing it to mp3 would just expand the size. Bah. It needs base I'm telling you. =scowls= I just downloaded it. =grins= hee hee hee
GiDo (Prayer): Not bad. Christmas-y So it's kind of slow.
Hero: This sounds like the beginning to What's her face's In My Pocket... Mandy Moore! There you go. But! Shinhwa's cooler so hah! I love this song. I need a better version.
Never Can Rewind: This is a cool song! Yeah! Bwah ha ha ha!!!!
Perfect Man: =sniff= Good song but I don't see what all the hype's about. Everyone loves this song. I think it's okay so... =shrugs= it's like them and First Love. It's not that great. Hoenstly. =grins=
Okay, now I'll be nice and post a good copy of a Shinhwa song ne?
The Solver: Cool song, it grows on you. Trust me. It sounds random now, but it'll be cool later.
Anyway, I don't have time to run through and edite this so live with my typos k? And I'll see if I can remember to rip some mp3s off the Shinhwa cd. I have to at least get you to listen to All Your Dreams. The mv made me cry! Gah!
1:38 AM
Now that's more like it! =cackles=
So! Anyway! Thanksgiving! Oh! Btw, Neko-chan? I'll be calling you and telling you, but I can't got on Thanksgiving. Gomen ne but I can't just leave my mom all alone. I'd feel bad. ^^;;; You still have to call me over the weekend to sing. =grins= But! I'm so jealous of Yinan. She can understand Japanese, Korean and Chinese!!! I know for sure she can write and read in Japanese and Chinese also. =pouts= I feel so bad for losing my language. Bah. But! It's freezing! And I'm dying because of Arcana! How could she leave it there! Bwaaaah! Noooooo!!!!!!!! =pouts some more= But! I'm also insanely happy because Sang let me borrow her Shinhwa cd! Do you realize how long I've been looking for Shinhwa mp3s? Forever! At least a year! Omg! Shninhwa's so cool! Okay, I sound like a crazed prep butt hat's okay. I think I deserve some slack. I was so dead on Monday that when I had to write an in-class thing on my religions, I confused Ms. Darrigo. She said I was running around in circles. Bwaaah. Gods Monday was bad. But today is Tuesday and it's cold! But wonderful. =grins= Shinhwa! Shninhwa! Eeeee!!!!!!! So! Yes, I already told Neko-chan and Baka Okami, so I guess there's no point. Ooh! I have to... Yeah. Hold on.
Btw, thesite for my briefcase files was http://briefcase.yahoo.com/ittaina in case you still needed it... And!!! Okay, song list. I'm going to have to go to the post office sometimes in the middle of this so everything will most likely be up by 3am...
4:05 PM
Hopefully the internet will let me upload this. Gra. Bulk posting. This week and last week. Router problems. =grumble grumble= Anyway, I'm pissed. I need new glasses. I have no time to get new glasses. Mom's pissed off because I threw off her plans. I'm pissed because of school work and Mom's pissed off at me. So? So I hate my friggin life. Did I ever mention it? Screw the world. Life sucks. No I was not fine. No I will never be fine. Yes I know that's not good. Yes I know I need anger management classes but honestly... Screw it. Evelyn will sit here and beam at you but Tori-san knows. Yes, she knows. Kazaore-san knows as well. They both argue amongst themselves. She's just a victim. She wants to kill us all. But why? Because she's evil. What do you mean? She just is. There's got to be a good reason. Because you left her. You left her...
You know what's weird? Sometimes I feel like a foreigner. Sometimes I feel like I'm on the outside looking in. It's all strange. The world seems like a silent movie. Everybody is moving around and interacting but I'm just watching. Nothing registers and I feel blank. Last night when Laura called me, that's how I felt. Just completely blank. I've never felt like that before. I wasn't depressed, I wasn't happy. My emotions had been set aside like I wanted them to be, but now it's the weekend. Time slows down and I remember. But now I'm so busy, so my feelings are set aside again. I have no time to feel. And so you wonder, how does she vent? Through this blog. It's really my only outlet. So I'm sorry that nothing makes sense. And I'm sorry I jump from topic to topic without any warning. But my brain is going on overload and I need to spill some of it out. So that's life right now. Or just a bit of it. I can't say I'll get any better, but I can say I'll get worse. Isn't that nice?
Even the little people get hurt.
Music: Sakamoto Maaya - Kissing the Christmas Killer
Blurb: If you drill a hole through the earth and it remined hollow and you pushed a guy in, he wouldn't stop in the center assuming there's no friction. He'd swing back and forth like a pendelum. If there is friction, he'd eventually stop, but mathematically, he never would because numbers can be infinite. The same concept is seen with walking to a door knob. If you were to start 100 meters away from the door knob and halve your distance every 5 minutes, you would never theoretically touch the door knob. Numbers can keep getting smaller but they never reach zero. But don't worry about the guy. He'll die in the first fall since he'll be moving faster than the speed of sound. Just a little thought for the weekend.
Music: Gensoumaden Saiyuki - Bad Friend
Blurb: The seiyuu from Saiyuki are sooooo spiffy. Heee... And! Cat ont he fence cat on the fence! Bwah ha ha ha!!!! I think I confused it because it saw me moving but it couldn't hear me. Heh heh heh. Cat on the fence come back!!!!! Hoe...
11:44 AM
I worked on a Friday! Miracle! For once! Woaw. Anyway, I finished all my hw except for the huge essay and Physics. =scowls= I get to go the Jenny's! Yay! I get to see everyone! =beams= So! Miyu has Lose Yourself in case anyone wats it. It's smaller than my copy but it's still over 5 mb so... You'll have to go to her site to go get it. Scary how we have the same tastes at around the same time... =shiver= Anyway, it's farging cold! Cold I tell you! =scowls= Need sun! Lots of it! Okay, so there is sun, but I need it to point into my window! It's not that hard since it's a window wall. =pouts= When I buy a house, I'm making sure I find out where the sun goes. And if there's no sun then I'm not buying the house. =grins= Sun is good peoples. It's so wonderful and warm... You know what's scary? I told Jenny already, but I actually have a favorite brand name of clothes. =shudder= Scary thought ne? Bwwwaaaaah. But I have a good reason! They make really warm sweaters! It's thin but fuzzy. =cackles= You know what's funny? People think my favorite color's pink. How odd. Well.... Okay, I like it now, but not as much as purple. It's not my fault people don't make purple shirts. =pouts= Mom's planning to overload me with pink clothing. I'm scared. But I can't really blame people for thinking that since I have a pink jacket and a new pink sweater. I like the pink sweater. So warm... =grins= Warmth is good. Toasty is better. Hee hee. I wonder if I can bring my hw to Jenny's thing... I think I will. So if there's ever a stagnant moment, I can try to write up either my anthro or my physics and just type it up when I get home. Oooo! Stereo effect! Wheeee! I'll be nice and post right now so I don't forget.
Music: Boa - Every Heart -Minna no Kimochi-
Fact: Boa's still cool. Baby Vox is starting to become cooler. Bwaaaah ha ha ha!!!! Because Baby Vox has better upbeat songs. =cackles= Hyper Ev at work! Watashi wa curaisi. lol. Okay, so curaisi isn't a word. Meh.
Anyway, I loaded 3 skins for Winamp 3 on Briefcase for Suz since I wanted to give her some skins for her new Winamp.
CornerAMP - It's really spiffy. You can put it in a corner! Okay, it know it sounds really dinky but I like it since I'm one of those corrdinating freaks. ^^;;;;
Echo - Nifty round thing but I kepp it because it looks nice minimized. ^^
Zygote - This thing is weird. I only keep it because it looks really creepy on the default color. I swear the rust loks like dried blood. O.Ov
But! For all of you Winamp3 users out there I have a question! Is it just me, or does the player create this static fizz in the bg when you're playing a song? You can hear it really well in the beginning of Akino Arai's Black Seed. I was fiddling with my equalizer trying to figure out what was going on but I found out that the fizz isn't affected by the equalizer. What's funny is that as the song develops and gets louder and busier, there's no more fizz! Ano.... How confuzzling. Anyway, that's it for me. I ran out of hw to do so now I'm worried. I think I'll get a head start on stuff so I won't freak out suring the week.
Music: Akino Arai - Black Seed
Blurb: You realize no one has the lyrics to this song? It's driving me insane. I want to be able to sing to it! Bwaaaaah!!!!!!!!!!
12:08 AM
Sopme things are just beyond your control. Somethings you just have to let happen. that's just the way life is. I know it sucks nuts, but yeah... Anyway, music postings! I went psycho with mp3.com on Friday so I got some mp3s fromthere. the good news (for Suz) is that you can burn it onto a cd legally! All of the songs posted on mp3.com are by the artists which means, you have their consent to download it. Also, if you read the fine print at the bottom of the page, you are allowed to burn a reasonable amount of copies. So! All of the songs posted right now (except for Oyasumi which is a leftover) are all from mp3.com
Ikarus - Ancient Lullaby: This is a super spiffy song. Ikarus has great world music. It has Indian lyrics with a nice calm beat.
Ikarus - Praying to Different Gods: This is a song on The Matrix - Revisited soundtrack. This is really cool too. I love Ikarus's style. Very nifty. e.e
Ikarus - Third Eye (Club Mix): Nice world sound again. Bwaaah. I'm currently wiped out, but I think it had Indian as well? Anyway, if you want more songs, go to Mp3.com: Ikarus. I wanted to post another song of their's with Indian and African lyrics, but I dunno if you all will like it. So I decided to stick to the ones I'm pretty sure you'll like. :3
And that's it! Well... Mebbe later, but not right now. Tho you should just take some time to browse around mp3.com and see all the artists. I'd avoid the singing sections like the plague (like pop and rock) but the electronica section's pretty good. There are a lot of talented artists out there.
Music: trance [] control - Psychotic Chaos
Blurb: You can get this song at Mp3.com: Trance [] Control. It's too big for me to post. Bwaaa.
Music: Eminem - Lose Yourself
Blurb: 8 Mile is the story of a part of Eminem's life. It's actually a musical. How funny is that? And of course he stars as Eminem. I want to watch it, but because it's Eminem, I'm afraid to. Sucks doesn't it? His music is great (in my opinion) but there's so much bad content that I'm embarrassed to like his music. ^^;;;