Conquest
������ I am called Ace; I cannot recall my true name, which is fine by me for I am no longer the woman that that girl once was.
������ I have seen much since that girl died. I have seen death, the destruction of souls, of lives and of innocence� and yet, recently I have seen unselfish concern and help, something that I never thought could exist. Renegade has shown me that there is indeed compassion in the world as well as selfless intentions. He has put his life on hold to take care of me, and I�ll admit that I�m not making it overly easy on him, but I know of no other way. I have never been able to trust and allow myself be cared for. Renegade just doesn�t see that. In truth I don�t think he can see past the fact that I am truly alive.
������ I was never as close to dying, as he would have thought, although with some of the things that were done to me, I would have preferred death. Like what they did to my DNA, it was messed up before but now I hate to think what happened to it. Whatever they did it took away my powers, and I don�t know for how long� it might be permanent.
������ I have begun to wonder what would have happened if I never gained my powers in the first place. Would I still be home? Would I be happy? Or would there be nothing for me? I don�t believe in any God, yet I sometimes think that everything happens for a reason, that is the way of the Celts, who my family had said were my people. If that is the case� then why did this happen now? To show me trust? To make the others know the gravity of their cause? Or maybe to give me a new beginning? Whatever it is, I don�t want to think of it right now.
������ Renegade is back in the motel room. I think he went to get some more ice. He looks concerned. I smile a little in hopes of reassuring him, it�s the least that I owe him, before I turn my back to him.
������ I avoid looking at the mirror on the bed stand as much as possible. I don�t like my reflection; my face is pale, warn and different. My hair is still the same but my eyes� my eyes are now a green blue. I can�t remember them ever being anything but black and white. I look like a stranger. It seems fitting I guess, for I feel like one too. I don�t feel the swelling heat, I can�t see the air movements, and I no longer feel the strength flowing through my limbs or the lightness of my bones when they ache for the feeling of flying free. I miss them all even though they all brought me a hindrance when I possessed them.
������ Renegade is looking at me from the foot of the bed. I know he is worried, I have not acted like myself since he broke me out of the lab. Maybe its because a part of me is still there. I know that I have to rebuild myself from my shattered remains yet I can�t bring myself to do it. All I can focus on is the overwhelming thrust for revenge over the person who took everything, my life� my soul from me.
������ I do not want to start again, I can�t. I don�t have the energy to do it. I can barely eat let alone start again. Renegade says that it will take time before I am strong enough to return home. He also told me that the others think I�m dead. I guess I�ll have to prove them wrong. I will get strong again, faster than expected and I will return to the team; I will show them I am still an ace, even without my powers, I will get my revenge, and I will become whole once more.
������ Then� in some way, I�ll repay Renegade for getting me out of there. I know it wasn�t easy for him, I know that labs aren�t his favorite places to be, but he conquered his fear, so I will conquer mine. I will be rebuilt, better than before; I will have no weaknesses� I will become Ace again� even if it kills me.