Locked up in our twisted minds, is a world of feelings for the earth, for our lives. And with these feelings come questions that can only be answered by ourselves. Why do we change for others? Why does life remain to be complicated? Why do we look down on ourselves? Is there a meaning to our life, a purpose? I can only speak on behalf of me. First of all, are there personalities and meanings behind names? My name meaning "Victorious Maiden". All of the Nichelles I've ever known or have heard of, all share great, successful lives. Does this mean we all share the same fate? Am I heading down that road? If so, we have no choice in our futures. Why are our futures made by people around us? I believe in individualism, I wish for individualism, and yet I find myself changing, for others. Must I hide behind flesh and blood, a mask of another. Our best qualities hidden from the world, from ourselves. We all need some support, a reason to bring out the best. To some they lose their reason, they're love for life and descend downhill into the hands of people who will manipulate and bring them down. My reason used to be life and happiness, but why am I locked up in a tower of my heart. The key to the tower has not been thrown away, only hidden. But as days go by the key is joined by thorns and bushes.
Sometimes don't you just wish you could watch life rather than being part of it. Never have to deal with problems, or feel uncomfortable in situations. The whole world would be its own little play, everyone a puppet performing for you. You only have to be the audience, don't have to stumble over unmemorized lines or feel nervous. But how much is life really worth. If you don't go out and do something, is that not living, or part of life? How come we end up going down the wrong road, and how do we know it was the wrong road if everything turns out okay? I wish I had the answers. I wish I could make the world a better place, be able to live. But we're played like puppets, only no strings. Do things come about because of accident. I once was singing a song, "Angel of Mine", when all of a sudden behind me was someone I cared about. My Angel. Was it a fluke. I think it was my awakening call, a sign. I only wish that most signs could be easily translated. But maybe that's the mystery of life. |
