~* Wandering Star's Favourite Things & Places *~

AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!! I just turned 25!!!!! Dammmm im old!! lol
This is a great day to be writing on here cos I have not felt
this happy in ages... **listens Aerosmith -- Pink** he he he..

Well.. at this moment.. I am a secretary at the office of a notary public.. And for the first time in my life. I actually have the feeling that I will actually be okay... that things will turn out for me... Since I have made my trip to Bali I have calmed down quite a bit... Not that I am satisfied with what I have seen of the world sofar.. cos there's still loads of places I want to see. and lots of stuff I want to do.. and things I want to experience.. people I want to meet... But for now.. finally.. I am happy where I'm at.. I have a great job!! For the first time I can say that I really have a GreaT job!! The people at the office are all wonderfully nice.. and my boss.. omg.. my previous boss was a big jerk..but this one.. He's made his company in a way so that everyone who works there really goes to work with pleasure!.. And I'm really gonna learn stuff here.. :) .. first job I have that's a challenge.. that I did NoT know how to do everything I have to do before I even started.... When I applied.. lol and even after.. my boss very much emphasized that fact that he likes his employees to be stable and trustworthy.. ppl he can build on.. and he likes them to stay with the company for ages! Hahaha.. oi if you want to scare me off to take a job you gotta tell me that u want me to stay workin there for years and years.. Makes me feel claustrophobic for some reason.. I can't stay in one place for too long.. But this time.. I dont know.. I'm glad I listened to my instinct because this is the most wonderful job I've ever had.. shouldnt speak too loud though.. *knocks on wood*.. cuz I've not even been there a month yet.. But I feel that this is going to be my job.. my real job.. If they'll have me I'd like to stay here for a long time.. because this is once in a lifetime.. specially for an office job! .... Anyway.. so yeah.. I'm quite happy with my life at the moment.. I have wonderful friends.. and my mother is doing well... I work in the Cameleon still every weekend, my great passion (looove the kids!!).. and SuMMeR is HeRe!!!!! :D

mmm.. well.. something bout my fam. & friends...
Of course there's my folks.. My mother.. she is the strongest woman that I know.. She went thru open heart surgery in the beginning of this year.. the surgery failed and they had to implant a pace-maker.. She's recovered really well and she hasn't had any trouble with her heart sofar yet.. :) .. And my dad.. he's taking care of her like I havent seen before.. they love eachother so much.. its amazing.. after more than 32 years.. they're still inseperable.. Coping with eachother.. coping with my mothers illness... coping with me... They are amazing.. no one could wish for better parents than I have... I can only hope that I will ever be able to have a marriage like that...
Mmm... my lil bro.. Ruben is like Mr. Perfect.. *L*.. he's 22 years old..
he lives and studies in Amsterdam.. has the sweetest girlfriend u
can imagine..she's just moved in with him!! :) and on top of that.. he's got the looks of a supermodel.. *L*.. He is loyal... generous.. sweet.. totally honest.. basically.. lol.. he's a Saint ;p
(If ur curious bout what my family and friends look like..
click on the link underneath..)

My Photoalbum

For fun I like to hang out with my friends and go out and DANCE!!!
This llast year I went to so many big raves, MysteryLand, Sensation, Awakenings, Shockers, Innercity.. etc.. but I have to say that I've had it a bit.. Now I prefer to take it easy.. I'm still goin out, but not so much to those huge parties anymore..
And of course I have my work at the Cameleon every weekend. I've been coming there for over 10 years now.. and it's become a part of my life.. I love to watch the kids kiss and play.. little boys chasing little girls.. dancing.. flirting..
Elisaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!... **kisses ya sexy baby**... luv ya.. :)))... Elisa just got herself a place of her own.. just for her and her lil Bart.. I'm so happy for her.. finally she can start to settle down a bit.. in the comfort of her own home.. without her mom harrassing her all the time.. *L*.. She's got a big mouth but a tiny heart.. and she deserves the best.. Elisa.. though I'm not saying it very often.. you know I love you to death.. You're a great chick!! Hope to know you for many years to come!.. Thank you for everything you gave me.. :)
And then there's Vicki of course.. I met her online.. she was a friend of my ex.. he introduced us.. and since then we never parted.. It's a friggin shame that she lives at the other side of the world, cos she and I are like sisters.. soulmates.. we'd have been a couple if either of us had a penis ;)~... Vicki.. se agapo baby mou.. 4ever..
And of course there's still always Marcella.. we dont see eachother as much as we used to.. but that doesnt mean I love her any less.. and SenSatiOn this summer was geweldig!!!
And of course there's Michelle.. Mizz Mum.. I've known her for about 10 years now..This girl..I have soOoOOo much respect for her.. Can't begin to tell her story cuz I'd be rambling on forever.. Can't begin to explain how much she means to me.. just because I don't know any words to descibe my feelings for her..

~*Welcome to Wandering_Star's Page*~

Email:

I have been online for a few years now..During that time I have
learned a lot about ppl. and maybe even more about myself..
I started out in the old Beseen.RomanceRoom..(it doesnt excist anymore)
and made my best onlinefriends in there..
*thinkin bout Christy, Dena, Ed, Jason, Max,
Di,my lil sis Kali and of course, Alex.. lol.. my first internetromance I had with him..

Among other things I have learned that it is important to never
forget that theres real people at the other side of the line..
When I left the RomanceRoom to xplore the net.. I met lots
of new ppl.. and it took me a while to realize, that they
as well are actual ppl. typing in the words that come to my screen..
But I found out the hard way and will be sure to not
make that mistake again..
Outside the RomanceRoom I have made also some new
friends..*smile*.. Vicki.. Guido.. Arjan.. Erik..Alexis.. Giannis.. to name a few..
But apart from the few real friends I have on here..
I try to not take the whole internet-thingy too seriously..
To just see it as a cool place to hang out..
relax and unwind.. get a load off.. make new friends and
learn about other countries and cultures..
MmmMmMMmm.. well.. anyways.. if yall wanna know what my friends
on here look like.. take a peek on the link below...

Pics of some of my online friends

A while ago I decided I didnt wanna be alone anymore.. I've been single for two years now.. (not counting a few brief flings).. and I think I am ready to get seriously involved with someone again.. I miss it too.. being together with someone you dont have any secrets for.. falling asleep in eachothers arms.. sharing your happiness and sadness with.. I just really want to be together with someone again... And I thought.. Spring is starting again.. the flowers are coming out.. the bees are back.. little baby animals are born.. what better time is there to try and open myheart again for someone..
Cos I've been too scared the past two years.. to completely give myself to anyone anymore... I'd been hurt so badly.. I didnt wanna go thru that pain anymore.. But then I realised.. that you can't have the love.. and you cant have that happy feeling.. if you close yourself up cos you're scared of the pain.. I'm somone that always lives 100%... when I love.. I love 100%.. I give myself 100%. .. I have tried.. to love a little.. and not to go head over feet.. but I can't help myself.. that just doesnt work for me... Live Life To The MaX.. and Love Life To The MaX.. I dont know how to do it any other way.. But because of this.. I also always hurt 100%.. and thats a bit of a bummer..
LoL.. cuz then I fell in love with Mr. W.. oi oi.. and I'm still not 100% over him..
I only spent six months with him.. but it was (afterwards ofcourse) a great time! That relationship (although we officially weren't supposed to call it that) had enormous high peeks.. it went up and down and up and up and down again..

Actually.. *g*.. I dont wanna discuss him on here.. he's very special to me and I wanna keep that for myself.. private stuff must stay private huh...

In this last year I have learned a lot about myself and ppl.
In November '99 I did a training on personal improvement
which made a lot of things much more clear for me..
I went thru some really rough and shitty times the past few years.. but I
lived thru it.. and its made me stronger in many ways..
I try to always keep working on myself cuz I believe that that
is the only true way to improve the quality of my life..
After the first training (The Essence) I did the follow-up on that
one... The Source.. *wide smile*.. and it was in that training
that for the first time in my life I learned to look at my-
self from a completely different point of view...
I learned that its quite okay to be me.. *L*.. that everybody has their
good and their bad sides.. and that life becomes a lot easier if you accept
that as a fact. You just have to concentrate on the good things,
and if the bad things bother you.. you can do something
about it.. work on it..
I try hard not to judge people and situations on things that have
happened in the past. It is impossible to get rid of your memories of the things
you have experienced.. But I think its a good thing to realize that
those things happened in the past and that the new person
or situation has nothing to do with your previous experiences. I'm not
saying that you shouldnt learn from the past, but just to think
carefully before you take action or judge someone.

Essence Trainings

As far as my believes are concerned..
I am not a member of any relegion, but I have my own way
of looking at the world and life and death. I believe in re�ncarnation.
I think we all have a purpose in life.. a goal we have to work on..
I believe in destiny.. things that happen in your life were (and are) meant to happen for you to learn and grow from. The good things just as well as the bad things.. How many times doesnt it happen that we remember certain ppl cuz
of the hurt that they've done us?.. Instead of that, I try to remember the good times
we had together and the things that person has taught me in life.
I do believe in God.. but I dont see him as a long bearded man sitting on a
cloud watching over us and deciding what happens to whom.
I see God as the spirit and light that shines inside you.. The guide that leads you along your way of growth..The light that will make sure nothing
that isnt meant to be willt happen to you...

I also believe in True Love...*vbs*...yea.. imma hopless romantic!! ..I believe that for every soul on earth there is a Twin-Soul.. the one that can complete you
and will make you take out and show the best in you. I believe that the moment you meet your Twin-Soul you know that that person is The One.
You will feel it vibrating in every inch of your body and soul when you meet that person.
It can be that all that time he was already right in front of you,
but you're not yet able to recognizethe person as your One True Love, untill time will pass..
and you will learn that that person is the only Right One for you....
Not all of us are so lucky to meet their Twin-Soul within this lifetime..
But along the path you walk during the different lifes you live, you will meet..
And I know for sure that this life, it is my time to meet him.. *LOL*..
maybe I even already have..
*crosses fingers*..

Well... that's about it for now.. if you have any more questions.. or if there's
anything you'd like to know.. feel free to ask, and I'll see if I'll answer.. *L*..
For now I invite you to take a tour thru my site and maybe
even learn a thing or two... *smiles*.. thank you for
taking the time to read about me and I hope you will enjoy the rest of
my site. Before you leave... I would really appreciate it if you'd take
a lil time to sign my guestbook..