The opening of the chapter simply establishes that Kaji is back in play as part of the cast. I had already brought him in a few times, but continued to leave off on other plot-threads that didn't involve him. This time, he remains in play as much as Ritsuko or Misato. His arrival also sets up the scene between Asuka and Shinji in her bedroom.
Revealing that Asuka, in her own mind, is simply impatient with boys in general and dislikes Shinji's weak attitude more than actually hating him is a major part of my making her seem less villainous in Kenosis. Now I'm crafting her into one of the team, not just an obnoxious red-head. However, Asuka wouldn't be Asuka without her sharp tongue and sophomoric wit, so I kept her dialogue very similar to her classic self in the anime, and simply cast more starkly into the 'defense mechanism' light rather than just part of her personality. Her apology, though private, marks the biggest show of her own shift thus far in Kenosis.
As usual, the SEELE meetings in Kenosis are blunt, short, with a bit of bickering, and establish the major plot-threads over which the rest of the story is laid. Neither Ikari or SEELE trust each other, and this scene makes that explicit while also establishing that Project 7 is indeed under way. That SEELE might get unstable through bickering is just a bonus for Gendo.
Though brief, the following scene is probably the most important aspect of chapter 23 plot-wise (I focus on the characters myself, which is why the plot seems almost tacked on.) Showing both Fuyutsuki's growing misgivings and hinting more at just what Project 7 is get the final plot-arc well under way. I think there is some room for debate as to whether Lillith is an Angel or not, so, for Kenosis, I considered Lillith a separate creature, and replaced the Second Angel with this 'Eve' creature.
Ayanami-sama's dream in the following scene is very important because it shows her development to this point. Her way of looking at herself and life is shifting, ostensibly due to Cirus, but he's simply a catalyst for it. The point of the dream is rather self-evident. Rei is debating whether or not she is allowed to take control of her own life, or if she really must obey Ikari because he made her. Cirus represents the knowledge that Ikari controlling her is simply the demented will of a very warped man, and Rei herself begins to openly struggle on the issue. This is a big step beyond her apathetic acceptance with the occasional rebellious feeling from before. She is truly starting to look at her life as her own from here on, but, like anyone would be, is very scared of the unknown future. And, of course, the idea that she actually could be a mother if that is true is simply adorable. I use such minor scenes in the actual series to justify my own story-line, so this scene, in particular, is one of the most important if one looks at the true purpose of Kenosis. Making Rei happy.
Finding new ways to introduce Angels is a very good way to give one's self time to work on the rest of the plot. I realized as I was cleaning up this latest edition of the story that I may have overused the 'energy-based Angel' idea. It is done, however, and I'm quite pleased with this particular Angel battle, so it will be staying. This scene with Cirus seeing energy snapping off a light-pole is only there to introduce the Angel, with a little character time for Cirus... And commentary on how evil cell-phones are...
The preparations in the command center in the next scene are probably one of the best examples of my 'ad-libbing' a scene. The fact that the pilots have their plug-suits on was originally written so that the fight could start easily, but then I decided to form a bit more tension around the introduction of the actual Angel itself in classic Evangelion style... talk about all the ideas that won't work until a long-shot solution is found. So, instead of the battle starting right off, an entire extra cycle is added, with Ritsuko and Maya trying to learn more about this Angel.
Honestly... I just wanted Cirus and Maya to interact. Maya is adorable, and I love giving her page-time. Having her interact with Cirus directly seemed as good a way as any to give that to her. Still, considering Cirus' idea to cut the power to the district in the previous scene, and him being the one who gives them the idea to scan more closely to the normal EM spectrum, I think I may be overplaying Cirus. This is a weakness that crops up with ad-libbing, repetition of characters. The dynamic in either scene (more the previous than this one, since this one would utterly change) would change very much if I simply gave Cirus' idea to another character, involving more extensive re-writing than ever intended for this edition of the story. It's a weakness of this fan-fic, plain and simple. Chock it up to coincidence that Cirus would come up with these ideas, I don't consider him smarter than anyone else at NERV. A better fighter than most, perhaps, but not smarter. I also wanted to show that Cirus' excessive politeness is not just reserved for Ayanami-sama. He finds Maya attractive in many ways similar to Ayanami-sama, and so he behaves in a similar manner.
The final scene in this part of the chapter simply establishes the 'all the ideas that won't work' I mentioned before, with a dramatic and abrupt beginning of the real battle. Continue to the next part for an Angel introduction I'm quite proud of.