You decide to go on your computer to surf the net a wee bit. You know you really should not try to oparate a computer so early in the morning (I mean any time before twelve is jus too early!!) but you are gonna try anyway. First you cannot get the damn thing to switch on. GRRR!! Just as you reach for your sledge hammer, you realise that you have not plugged it in. Oops! Ok, now you're cooking! Things are going fine, that is until the net connection is going too slow for you, AAAAHHHH!!!! You do have what is supposed to be the best and fastest modem in the world but it is so early in the morning and you are so wired up on caffine that you want to hit it with something to get it to go faster, preferably your head. Just before you start to smash your own brains out on the keyboard, you get in to your mail. Exellent! You start to open up your mail and you get a good one from your friend in America. Its brilliant! You decide to print it off so you can show it to all your other friends. You start to print it off, but wait...Its not printing...FUUUUCCCKKKKK!!!!!!!! You go to throw a wobbly at the printer. When you look at it with rage in your eyes you see that you haven't put any paper in...D'oh!!!! You put the paper in and it starts to print. Half way through, it jams. Damn, damn, damn!!! Thats it, you rip the printer from the computer, jump up and down on it, then throw it out the window, just managing to hit local nutcase on the head with it and give him concussion. What a fecking day! To cheer yourself up, you decide to read the rest of you e-mails. You open the next one ane...you get a virus that wipes everything off your computer! AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! That tops the lot. You run into the shed and pick up you chainsaw and take it to the computer, and because you are so worked up, everything else you see(including people). The last thing you remember is the men in white coats taking you away (even though you thought they could not recognise you because you are the Easter Bunny). Now who has felt like this?
Computers by Louise Milburn
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