Shadow Haven
Another View On Smoking
By April Diaz
Statistics can be given, health policies can be passed out, restaurants may ban, and governments can stamp laws. Yet statistics shall always be shrugged off, health policies thrown in the trash, restaurants have patios, and have you stopped to think about how many people in congress actually smoke? Smoking is bad… and yet it is good. Media implores it as an accessory, which cool wannabies, and those who idolize their stars and be in the ‘in crowd’ follow every suit. It’s frowned upon by the healthy society and frowned upon everyone else. It’s the one thing most can’t help but do. They all try to quit and some may be successful, until another spiteful problem skips its way into the man who is now three months chimney clean and then he lights up for his fix just to let himself be calmed or taken away. Marijuana can take it all away too and no one has ever heard of a ridiculous marijuana overdose or died from smoking up.
Personally I am totally clean. I have not even picked up a cigarette in my life. Its not that I never was offered or had the opportunity to. I just thought I was being part of the minority. The rebellious group which never smoked, not realising that I would be later praised by the majority of family members who thought it much ladylike for a girl not to smoke. Have I ever considered it? Of course I have. I saw my father smoking and though it made me curious and at times play with ‘Popeye’ candy sticks, pretending to light them up with a Lego made lighter. It was fun. I saw classmates in Grade five lighting up their smokes and standing around in closed places trying not to be caught, and at the same time bashing certain teachers who would walk around the block at lunch break. “Hey look at Mr. So-and-so, he tells us not to smoke but we’ve even caught him on school property smoking away while talking to the bus driver.” They had not only seen their parents puffing away at the slender white smoke as they told them, “If I ever catch you smoking you’ll be grounded till your thirty seven!” They saw their teachers doing it too. Then taking a walk down a Toronto street every older kid or adult had that cancer magick stick wedged in between their fingers.
Then there was movies and TV. How many times have we seen a character on the big screen or television slickly pop a Rothmans into their lips, light up, and drop it into a pool of kerosene that eventually blew a car up while he walked away as if it were nothing but the usual. And they make a bigger deal out of burping and passing gas than the nicotine inhaling. Weird… Then further probing into the lives of Hollywood idols, I once found a photograph of David Duchoveny with a glass in his hand and an opened pack of cigarettes. Then there was J.J. Mr Jameson from Spiderman. Yeah, no one liked the guy really, probably because he was bashing the main character the whole Spiderman series, or the fact that that little moustache under his nose made him look like Charlie Chaplin with a stick up his ass. But he always had that big fat Cigar stuck between his teeth while he talked. Especially when he was doing the same damn thing in the cartoon on Fox. What is that telling kids? Then there was that strange episode of Pinky and the Brain where the Brain sought world domination through advertising smoking to not only nicotine hungry adults, but little glossy eyed kiddies, while taking up smoking himself. Apparently putting a cigarette in a cute little animal’s mouth makes it quite adorable. It didn’t really seem so in that Concerned Advertisers thing. You know that company with the exclamation mark as their logo. They stood a bunch of household and zoo animals around with smokes in their mouths. I wonder if the animal rights bashed them for that commercial.
Notice everything in society that becomes an accessory to the fashion or social industry is condemned, and then damned right after? What’s the newest craze or accessory since the cigarette between the fingers? The mobile phone. Then just two weeks ago right after I bought my first Nokia they announced that they officially proved that it caused brain tumours! Well you can tell that I freaked out, but being so addictive, attractive, and clad in my favourite shade of red I love that phone still. Brain tumour scares gonna stop me? Probably not. Then wasn't it a little while ago we found that nickel and mercury found in earrings caused problems as well? There goes 75% of my jewellery shipped to the salvation army. No matter what I guess anything that is like an additive to the appearance will always be bad for you. Just like how lipstick will discolour the lips after excessive use over decades. And too much of that caked paint we women put on our faces will increase wrinkles nearly as much as smoking. Then what does that perhaps tell you about female smokers. With smoking the look of their age increases, they get more wrinkles, they buy cheaper makeup to hide their faces causing them to age when their purpose is to look younger, thinner, and have a healthier glow. I’m sorry sister but I have my bets on that “glow” being the yellow from your teeth and fingers.
Smokers apparently want to quit. Well then how come they have not? For most females it is through the search of being thin or acceptance in fitting in that they turn to smoking. Does it really slim you down? If it did then how come so many people are still slightly overweight even when they smoke? I mean its not like they are eating the cigarettes and saving the cartons for dessert. I often hear from successful quitters, If you really want to quit then you will quit. If you think you do but aren’t sure. Sugar, don’t kid yourself. Then the health advisors go out and tell you, everyone try and quit! You are gonna die! You are gonna die! You are definitely gonna get cancer, spend you last days attached to some tube in a hospital, THEN YOU GONNA DIE! What the hell happened to the optimist sprouting words of encouragement? Oh yeah. They do sprout words of encouragement. “Your gonna die! You can do it! I know you can!” Then the unsuccessful ones sit there watching non-smoking bullshitters hand out commercials thinking, “Thanks for the support, asshole.” Actually what I’m sure every committed smoker wants to see is someone to call a hero with a butt. Some teenager with an attitude who doesn’t know right from wrong put out a butt in the middle of some employee of the Health Ministry’s forehead. Or shove a smoke up their ass and say “Smoke this.” Yes I do believe this is a little immature, but isn’t following the majority of society immature as well? But where would all our fun come from.
The biggest thing for the teen and youth generation is now the controversy, nicotine or marijuana. Pot mostly wins, but that’s only after they have already become at the least, a social smoker. I would probably prefer marijuana. I hear the effects are quite mind numbing fun! Notice people who smoke up are happier too? Sure they use tons of vulgar language, but then again most people who turn to light up the little rolled paper are in some depression. They aren’t after. Sure just like the song they messed up their lives, “Because I got high, because I got high, because I got high, La da da da dat dat!” Afro Man has the right idea that its fun while it happens, but the after effects of not being on the doobie seem to mess you up pretty bad. Whilst smoking only gives you the uncontrollable crave, twitching fingers, so on and so on, especially if they try to quit. Then you have to try and keep their hands busy. Yeah let’s see you ladies out there try to get your quitting significant other into knitting and macramé.
So here still stands the war. To smoke or not to smoke that is the question. I choose not to. It just never really appealed to me. Although it looks glamorous, it smells. And I am one of those people who are more partial to the sweet scents of roses and fruity perfumes and body mists. I may not have the right to bash or support smokers because I myself have never gotten to even pick up a damn cigarette and put it in my mouth. My grandmother died from the second hand smoke, but a ninety-something member of my family is still smoking and the damn woman can run after a chicken to cook it for dinner. Smoking has even given good points in my life. When a friend is going through some raging frustration most of them just light up so that way I don’t have to listen to too much of their whining after. Or at least be happy that they relieve some stress that way, even if stress builds up after they can’t find enough money at the bottoms of their shattered piggy banks to buy a pack. Hey whatever shoots your pig, so long as it doesn’t bother too many people. I think the rule should not be, non-smokers like me get the right of way. I think it is more fair with the simple “I was here first” rule.