The
Darkness in the Day
by April Diaz
Oh sing unto me
sweetly
Dearest sorrows of day
Who knew such darkness could
Come from pure light
Oh wonder in
mystery
Intrigued and yet filled
Sorrow
Betrayed
Lied to
And Sinned
My own fault my
own
My punishment for living
That which should have ended
A year past
It tortures me now
One year ago
It would have been done
Had not salvation come
Had not a savior been found
Though through
the opening of my eyes
I have sinned
When travelled to the light
I know now what has been
No good years
upon my belt
To memories to smile upon my past
I've never had that true
moment...
Have I?
The one that makes all life last
Last!
Ha!
Why do I need it to last?
When one year past
I would have been gone.
I drink this poison now in my
hands
As the rain falls
As the heat stirrs
As the pale walls mock me
And the glass encloses
Then it comes
It pirks up in my brain
The savior once again
No! I can not! Do not think at
all!
If I think of him...
...it will be harder to rid
myself of pain...
Spite this feeble body!
The poison has escaped from my
lip
So dash i do
for parallel blades
The intentions be to gash
Damn!Not again!
Oh why? Oh why?
It is not me who you need to go
on!
I am nothing I am lost I am gone!
Haunt me no more!
Please let me be gone!
Then out from
the mockery walls
I run to the sanctuary, locked.
Oh rope in my hands I ready to
pull.
Oh but how the noose comes loose!
I dash for drawes, through chests
I look.
Lost and unfullfilled.
No pills, no small daggers
Nothing in here!
My misfortune grows so real.
A way out is
all I needed.
And for the sin of living and
kindness
I must pay
To go on in life
Confused and alone
To feel the darkness in the day.
-Written March 28, 2001