"Steph! Catch!" My Dad called as he threw an apple across the room to me.
"Thanks, Dad," I said, as I took a bite of the apple and shifted my bag on my shoulders. "You're welcome. How was your day?"
I swallowed the apple and grinned. "Good, actually. I got an A for my English essay."
Dad grinned back as he stirred his coffee. "That�s my girl." I smiled again and headed out of the kitchen and towards my room. I dropped my bag on my bedspread and flopped into my desk chair, clicking the power button on my computer. My Dad�s quite cool, really. I mean, my friends are always saying how they hate their father, how they just got grounded by him, but me and my Dad, we�re really close. I guess it�s just because he works from home, so he�s always been there for me to talk to after school, and he�s basically my primary caregiver. My Mom is a lawyer, and she spends a lot of time at the office, so I don�t see her as much as I see Dad. And being an only child, I guess that makes us closer, too.

I waited for the computer to load, taking another bite of my apple. When it was done, I clicked my internet connection, and checked my mail. Nothing. I sighed and opened mIRC. I typed in my nick, Babybird, and waited for the computer to make the connection. I use mIRC a lot. It�s awesome to meet new people, and it�s really easy to indulge in my favourite pastime on-line - arguing. My Dad�s always telling me I�m too stubborn, but I think it just makes me who I am. It�s like what my math teacher said once, when I had a headache and had been quiet for the whole class, "Stephanie not arguing?? Can it be true?" I reckon that sums it up pretty well, actually. I like to argue in maths especially. I�ve discovered that arguing delays actually doing math, and that�s always a good thing.

The computer beeped, breaking into my thoughts and reminding me that I had to type in a channel name. There�s one channel that I�m always on��#hanson. Okay, I admit it, I like Hanson. I�m a teenybopper - not that I mention that often in public, but I am. I typed in the channel name and a window appeared on the screen. I quickly scanned the list of names and was glad to find my on-line �best friend�, Dr^Pepper, was on. I quickly typed in,

Babybird: Howdy all!

A couple of the regulars said hi, then Dr^Pepper said,

Dr^Pepper: Baby!! You�re here!!!
Babybird: Sure am, Pepper. A bit slow today, are we?

I opened a private chat with Pepper and started a conversation.

Babybird: Howzit?
Dr^Pepper: good thanks. You?
Babybird: the usual

Pepper is one year older than me, male, and living in the USA. His real name is Joshua, and he�s really nice. We stick up for each other in the channel, and mail each other regularly.

Babybird: Hey! Ya didn�t mail me!! *pout*
Dr^Pepper: Don�t pout! I�ve been busy - I�ll mail you right after we finish chatting, promise. Sorry :)
Babybird: it�s ok, I forgive ya, I guess

After that, we both went back to the main channel and I started an argument with RR`, another regular, about cyber relationships.

Babybird: You can�t fall in love with someone over the net, RR. How can you love someone you�ve never met? How many people do you know who met on the net, and are still in a relationship in real life?
RR`: So it�s rare. But it can happen. You're getting to know the person for who they are, and not their appearance.
*** Toothpaste has joined #hanson
Babybird: Toothy!!
Toothpaste: Baby!!
Babybird: Heya!
Toothpaste: What�s up, dahlink?
Babybird: Not much. I�m having a argument with RR. Wanna help?
Toothpaste: Sure. What�s the topic?
Babybird: Cyber relationships. I say they never work.
Toothpaste: Oh. But what about jjack and Meggy?
Babybird: That doesn�t count.
Toothpaste: why not?
RR`: yeah, why not?
Babybird: ummmm just coz
*Babybird is trying to stall the conversation coz she�s losing��.. :|
Toothpaste: *LOL*
Dr^Pepper: having some trouble, Baby?
*Babybird whispers "Psst! Pepper! Come help me win!"
Dr^Pepper: *LOL* give up, Baby!

"Steph!! Phone for you!!" My Dad�s voice rang throung the house and reached my bedroom I sighed and looked from the screen to the door.
"Ok, Dad! In a sec," I turned back to the screen, and just as I was about to type bye, I saw Pepper had opened a private chat with me.

Dr^Pepper: Steph, I really need to talk to you about something. It's kinda important...
Babybird: I�m really sorry, Josh... I have to go get the phone��.I�ll come back on in ten minutes, k?
Dr^Pepper: Umm, ok�.see ya then
Babybird: bye!

I disconnected and closed the mIRC window. I reached the hall just as Dad did. He handed me the portable phone.
"It�s Katie, I think"
"Thanks, Dad" I took the phone off him and pressed the talk button. "Hello?"
It awas Katie, and she was just ringing to tell me about a party at her house that weekend. I agreed to go and got her off as soon as I could. I re-connected to mIRC, only to find that Pepper had left already. I sighed as I, once again, disconnected. I couldn�t help wondering what it was he wanted to talk about�but whatever it was, it sounded serious. I just hoped he�d be back on next time I connected. I quietly turned the screen off on my computer and left my room.

chapter two

The computer pinged and I went through the familiar process of typing in the channel name. When the window appeared, I scanned the list of names. My excitement dampened when I found Jordan�s nick wasn�t among them. I glanced back at the main window and typed in;

Babybird: Hey guys!!!
IronGal Hey BB!!!!!!!
Babybird: hi!!!!!
hippie_chic: BB!!!!!!!
Babybird: hey hippie
*hippie_chic runs in rectangles
Babybird: has anyone seen pepper?!?!?
hippie_chic: he was on a while ago, asking for you�.
Babybird: damnit! Did he say if he was coming back?
hippie_chic: nope..
Babybird: hmmmmm
hippie_chic: lalalalalala
IronGal: BB - didya get my mail?
Babybird: I�ll go check it now�.hang on a sec�.

I opened my mailbox and sifted through the mail. There was the usual junk mail, a letter from Geocities, and Iron�s letter. My heart skipped a beat when I saw Jordan�s address in the window. I quickly opened the letter and started reading.

Hey,
I�m sorry I missed you. My Mom wanted me to help her with something, so I had to get off. I�ve just been in #hanson, looking for you, but you weren�t there. I still need to talk to you, so, umm, I�ll be on again in about three hours, and if you're there, we can talk.

See ya,
Jordan.

I checked the time the mail had been sent - I had about one and a half hours until he was on again. I closed my mailbox and opened mIRC again.

Babybird: Thanx for the mail, Iron. I�ll write you back right away.
IronGal: kewl
*Rain99 has joined #hanson
Babybird: Heya Rain!! Howareya?
Rain99: good, thanx. How about you?
Babybird: I�m doing okay.
Rain99: Hey - what�s up with Pepper? He seemed pretty flustered before�.asking where you were, saying he needed to talk - what�s happened?
Babybird: I have no idea. I keep missing him�but he said he had something he needed to talk about.
Rain99: Wonder what it was��
Babybird: hmm��

I chatted a while longer before I left to get a snack. It was only yesterday that Joshua had told me he needed to talk, but it had been bugging me all day. In school, I�d spent most of my spare time pondering what could possibly have happened, but nothing came to mind�.
I filled a glass with milk and grabbed some cookies from the jar in the kitchen. I nibbled on a biscuit as I connected again. Dad always says I shouldn�t eat near the computer, but I figure if I've done it for two years already - why stop? When #hanson came up, I searched the list. Finding Joshua was on, I opened a private chat with him, ignoring the main window.

Babybird: heya! I got your mail�
Dr^Pepper: good.
Babybird: so�.?
Dr^Pepper: okay�umm, right
Babybird: You wanted to talk to me about something�?
Dr^Pepper: Umm, yeah�
Babybird: well�.?
Dr^Pepper: ok�.. Steph?
Babybird: yes?
Dr^Pepper: I�m �.. my name�s not Joshua.

I blinked. His name wasnt Joshua?? That wasn�t really what I had expected him to say�. Not that I knew what exactly I'd expected�.

Babybird: no?
Dr^Pepper: no.
Babybird: So then what is it? And why did you lie?
Dr^Pepper: my name is Issac. Clarke Isaac Hanson.

chapter three

My mouth dropped open and I stared at the computer for a few moments, before regaining my composure. And then, a wave of embarrassment swept over me. This was the guy I�d confessed all my thoughts on hanson to?? This was the guy I�d told about my crush on Ike??? I just about fell off my seat as all the things I�d said came rushing back to me. I seriously came real close to headbanging the keyboard. But the weird thing was, I didn�t for a minute think that he could be lying to me. As much as I felt both excitement and dread at the thought, it all made so much sense. The overseas trips, the time spent away from the computer. Now that I knew, I couldn�t understand how I hadn�t made the connection before.

Dr^Pepper: Steph?? I�m sorry I never told you. Please forgive me! You have to understand, what would have happened if I�d told anyone� I waited this long to tell you to make sure I could trust you. I�m really really sorry. I just didn�t want you to treat me differently�.
Dr^Pepper: talk to me, please!
Dr^Pepper: say something??
Babybird: I�m not mad.
Dr^Pepper: so you�re talking to me??
Babybird: I�m just shocked, I guess�. And embarrassed.
Dr^Pepper: embarrassed??
Babybird: well� yeah
Dr^Pepper: why?
Babybird: Because, well, I said things to you about you guys, and� it was you all along!
Dr^Pepper: Don�t be embarrassed. It was great to have someone to talk to who didn�t have their judgement clouded by knowing it was me. You told the truth, and I really appreciated that.
Babybird: the truth wasn�t always kind�
Dr^Pepper: Yeah, but thats a good thing� It helped me to know what fans really think.
Babybird: If it worked so well that way, then why did you tell me?
Dr^Pepper: I�m not really sure. I guess I just got sick of lying. So when I decided I was going to tell you yesterday, I had to do it. That's why I made such a big deal out of it�
Babybird: It IS a big deal!
Dr^Pepper: I know�.
Babybird: hey� how come you picked Joshua?
Dr^Pepper: it's Mac's real first name. It just popped into my head when you asked my name :)
Babybird: ahhh that's right :)

There was a long pause before he said;

Dr^Pepper: BB? I�ve got to go�. My Mom�s calling me�.. mail me, ok?
Babybird: yup. See ya later...
*Dr^Pepper leaves the room

I leaned back in my chair. So Pepper was Isaac? I got a mental image of him sitting behind the computer, typing in the messages I had come to love getting. It did make a lot of sense. But I still couldnt get over the stuff Id said to him. I groaned, and leaned forward to turn off the computer. I flopped onto my bed, and lay watching the ceiling, going over the thoughts that were running through my mind at an incredibly fast pace. Joshua's - Isaac's - words kept coming back to me. "�I didnt want you to treat me differently.." What if I did treat him differently from now on? My gaze shifted from the glowing plastic stars that cover my ceiling to the Hanson poster on my wall, and Isaac�s face. The deep brown eyes, the wavy blonde hair - this was the face behind the words? I sighed again, and, climbing off my bed, headed for the lounge.

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