there's a growing lump
stuck in my throat
and i just want to cry
but i just choke it down
push it out of the way
my only fear is that i
will stray
far from the vow i sent
to heaven
to not let that lump
back up
to thrust it back
down into my
vast soul is a
trial i don't want
repeated over again to
save me again and living
again is pointless
that vow is broken and
it comes back. the
lump in my throat is back
and now i cry
for myself
for my love
for life lost
the lump remains
and i wonder why
but to face my
fears is like trying
to fly
the lump will stay
not go away
forever and ever
and ever
~erika boal