| *BeCaUsE*i*Am*A*wOmAn* |
| I aM a WoMaN. i ShAvE mY lEgS, i SiT dOwN tO pEe, AnD i CaN jUsTiFy AnY sHoPpInG sPrEe. I dOn*T gO tO a BaRbEr, BuT a BeAuTy SaLoN, cAn GeT a MaSsAgE wItHoUt a HaRd~On. I cAn bAlAnCe A cHeCkBoOk, PuMp My OwN gAs, CaN tAlK tO mY fRiEndS aBoUt ThE sIzE oF mY aSs. My bEaUtY iS a MasTeRpIeCe, AnD yEs It TaKeS lOnG, bUt At LeAsT i AdMiT tO oThErS wHeN i Am WrOnG. i DoN*t DrIvE iN cIrClEs, At AnY cOsT, aNd I dOn*T hAvE a PrObLeM aDmItTiNg I*m LoSt. I nEvEr FoRgEt An ImpOrtAnT dAtE. yOu JuSt GoTtA dEaL wItH iT: i*M uSuAlLy LaTe. DoN*t WaTcH mOvIeS wItH lOtS oF gOrE. dOn*T nEeD iNsTaNt RePlAy To ReMeMbEr ThE sCoRe. I wOn*T lOsE mY hAiR, I dOn*T gEt JoCk ItCh, JuSt BeCaUsE i Am AsSeRtIvE dOn*T cAlL mE a BiTcH. dOn*T sAy To YoUr FrIeNdS "yEaH i CaN gEt HeR." iN yOuR dReAmS mY dEaR, fOr I cAn Do BeTtEr. FlOwErS aRe GrEaT, bUt JewElRy Is BeTtEr. WoUlD yOu LoOk At My FaCe AnD nOt My ChEsT? i DoN*t HaVe A pRoBlEm ExPrEsSiNg My FeElInGs, I kNoW wHeN yOu ArE lIeInG, yOu StArE aT tHe CeIlInG. dOn*T cAlL mE a GiRl, A bAbE oR a ChiCk, I aM a WoMaN... gOt ThAt YoU pRicK?! |