My Unhappiness
I've cried too many times this month
Written my suicide note one time to many
Looked unhappy for the 100th time
And wished I had purpose again today.
I've written in my diary about life and death
Wished I had a reason to live
Looked at the stars and wanted to die
Asked God to kill me or give me the reason.
I've looked at my boyfriends face as he slept
I wished I could be gone when he woke
Wanted to forget about them all
But never had the guts to leave.
I've wanted to sing
Needed to be alone and cry
Wanted the one I love to hold me
And wished my life was making me happy.
Bec Spence, 21- 7- 2001
Copyright © 2001, Bec Spence