PART 19

Today I�m not up to going to school.  After that night I kicked Michael out of my house, I haven�t been able to sleep.  All I�ve been doing is crying or exercising.  I climb back into my window and glance at the clock to see it�s 5 am.  Time to get ready for school.  I head for the shower.  I�ve been jogging on nights that I can�t get to sleep or am just feeling sorry for myself.  Jogging and/or singing have always been a way for me to forget my problems.  I turn off the water and get dressed.  I go downstairs to the kitchen and try to eat breakfast.  Another thing I haven�t been able to do is eat.

I�m playing with my food when Alex comes downstairs.  �Did you make any for me?�  I push my plate to him and stand up.  �You�ve got to eat, Lizzie.�  I shake my head in response.

�What happened, Lizzie?  Why don�t you talk to me?� 

I shake my head.  I�m not ready to say Michael and I are no longer a couple, because I don�t want to think about it.  I lift my head up and close my eyes willing myself not to cry.  You can do this.  Just drown out all your emotions.  You�ve done it before so it�s not hard.  �Please, Lizzie.  Maybe if you talk about it, it won�t hurt as much.�  I don�t say anything.  I can�t talk about it, not yet. That wound is still fresh.  Alex walks up behind me and turns me around to hug me.  I feel my body begin to tremble so I push away from him.  I don�t want to cry.  I don�t want to feel sorry for myself.  �I�m fine.�  I hear him sigh. 

�Why don�t you stay home?  You don�t have to go to school.� 

I shrug my shoulders and say, �I�ll have to go eventually, so I might as well get it over with now."

There�s a knock at the door and my heart sinks.  That can�t be him.  I can�t see him, not yet, not this soon. 

Alex walks to the door and answers it.  I let out my breath in relief when I see Isabel at the door.  They greet each other with a kiss and I turn away.

�Hey,�  Isabel says when she enters the kitchen followed by Alex.  I smile at her the best I can and she gives me a sympathetic look.

�Is Michael going to school today?�  Alex asks Isabel.  I turn to look at him because there�s a hint of bitterness in his voice.  Isabel must have heard it too, because she�s almost hesitant to answer. 

�He is.  Daddy wouldn�t let him stay home another day.  Since he �. Since he doesn�t appear to be sick anymore.� 

I know Isabel and I know she�s hiding something, so I reply, �What? His girlfriend came over?�

Isabel casts her eyes downward and says, �Daddy is just mad at him, right now.� 

I laugh bitterly and say, �But you still didn�t answer my question. Did he have a guest over or not?�  I know she�s lying for him because of the way she doesn�t answer my question.  �Forget it.  I�m walking,� I say harshly.  I leave slamming the door behind me.

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I try to stay home, but my old man won�t let me.  He thinks if I�m able to disappear without a trace and have friends come over, I�m healthy enough to go to school.  In a way, I do want to go, because then I�m able to see Liz.  I tried to call her all day yesterday, but she wouldn�t take my calls.  I could tell Alex was getting pissed at me, so I stopped calling her and went to her house, but she wasn�t there.  So I just stood outside her window for a while hoping she�d be home soon, hoping she�d take me back.  I headed back home depressed.  An unwelcome Tess was waiting for me.  I couldn�t believe she had the nerve to show up when she the one who caused me to lose Liz, the person that made me feel whole.  I kicked Tess out upon seeing her.  I didn�t want her near me; I didn�t want her to think I wanted anything to do with her.  Isabel hadn�t liked the way I handled the situation, but I didn�t care.

I notice Isabel is already gone.  I�m guessing she�s meeting up with Alex. I wish she had told me.  Now I have to ride with Max.  I�m waiting for Max to get his face out of the mirror.  When he finally approves he heads for the door and I follow behind him.  He unlocks the door and says, �I would have never guessed you�d swallow your pride to ride with me.�

�It was either that or walk.  I'd rather torture myself than walk,�  I say briskly.  We both get in the car and the drive is silent.

I look out the window hoping Liz will talk to me.  I don�t think I can take it if she doesn�t.  How am I going to prove to her I want her and not Tess? I just have to get her alone then maybe I�ll be able to convince her.

�Has Liz put out yet?�  Max asks bringing me out of my thoughts. 

I look over at him hoping I didn�t hear what I thought I did.  �Excuse me?� 

Max�s voice rising  he repeats, �Has Liz put out yet?  She looks like she could be an animal in bed.�

�Shut the hell up.�  I scowl. 

Max laughs and says, �I guess she hasn�t.  If it were me, bro, she would have given it up a long time ago.�

�Didn�t I tell you to shut the fuck up?  What part of that didn�t you understand?�  I growl.

�Don�t get all worked up.  I was just asking a question,�  Max replies.

�I don�t want you to ever talk about Liz like that.  You got that?�

Max rolls his eyes and says, �Or what?  You going to kick my ass?  So it�s okay for you to lead her on and fuck some other girl?�

I narrow my eyes at him and say, �What the hell are you talking about?� 

Max laughs, �Didn�t you hear?�  He laughs again.

�No, so why don�t you just spit it out.�

Max parks the car in the school�s parking lot and says, �Well first off, you were caught making out with Maria under the bleachers.  I hear that�s her favorite make out place.  Then Tess arrived in town.  Well she's the other girl you�re fucking.  Were you ever going to tell Liz?  Do I have to go and comfort the poor girl?  You�re such a screw up, Michael, but seeing how we�re half blood and all, I�ll let you in on a little secret.  When it comes to women, don�t piss them off, because they�ll find ways to hurt you.�

I watch Max as he heads toward the school, but he suddenly comes back to me and says, �And I�m only telling you this because Isabel asked me to.  I know they're only rumors and you need to go to the source to get it straightened out.  But this time it�s not Tess.�  I dazedly watch Max walk off.  I can�t believe he�s helping me.  What�s got into him?

I quickly walk into the school in search of a certain person.

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As I approach my locker, I see Max waiting for me.  I�m not in the mood to deal with his shit.  �What do you want, Max?�  I sigh.

Max smiles and says, �I just wanted to tell you two things.�

�Make it fast.� 

He chuckles and says, �In a hurry, are we?�  I roll my eyes and face him with my arms crossed.  �First I want to tell you how beautiful you are.�  I slam my locker closed and start to walk off, but Max stops me by placing his hand on my shoulder.  �Wait.  I also want to tell you that I like you, Liz, and I know I�ve been a jerk before, but since you�ve been such a good friend to Isabel I just want to return the favor, okay?� 

I nod wondering what he�s trying to tell me.  I try to get a glimpse of his eyes, but they're downcast.  He looks into my eyes and says, �You�re going to hear rumors going around, but don�t believe them.  Also don�t take your anger out on the innocent person.�  Max rolls his eyes and continues, �I can�t believe innocent and �. well never mind.  Anyway believe me when I say this, the betrayer isn�t the one you�d expect.�  He walks off without a backward glance.  What the hell does he mean?  Why was he speaking in riddles? Whatever, I�m not going to worry about it.
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