" In Jesus Hands "

He came to me last night, in my dreams.

He said " Momma, it will be alright. I am

in a new home, far away from you, but

never far away from your heart.

I cried a tear, he held my hand. I said

" Son, it's not fair they took you away,

from me. I never got a chance to tell you,

I Love You".

He said " Momma, you told me everyday,

in things you did and in what you'd say."

I cried a tear, he held me close to him.

I said " son, I never got to say Good-bye,

never got to touch your face and see your

eye's".

He said " Momma, Good-bye is forever,

never say it unless you really mean it, say

I'll see you soon. For Momma there is

never a good-bye in the love we share".

I cried a tear, he looked in my eyes as he

wiped them from my cheeks.

I said," Life's a bitch I do know this, but

you were my baby and I was not there to

protect you".

He said, " Momma, your so right, I only

wished I realized all you said sooner, then

what I did. Momma, I needed to grow

on my own, you taught me well, the best you

could, but as you said so many times before,

life is full of choices and roads to choice.

I choose a road that turned out to be my

final destination. Not your fault, as you said

God picks the best petals of his flock, I was

a petal he choose that day."

I cried a tear, he held my hands.

I said " Son, I will never be able to touch

you again, or whisper in your ear, or laugh

with you. I will never hear my name usher

through your lips. I miss you so, my heart

aches inside."

He said, " Momma, everytime you bring

your arms to your chest, I am inside of them.

Everytime you call my name, I am next to you

Everytime you think of me, it will be because

I thought of you first. Your not alone, I will

always be by your side."

I wiped my tears and woke to a darkened room.

For a second, I could have sworn it was my son.

He smiled at me, blew a kiss, then winked his eye.

and he said " I'll see ya later, Momma".

Was it really him, or just a dream within a dream,

I might never know for sure.

But that night left my heart feeling a little warmer

inside.   For now I know, my son is in Jesus's

hands.

I could never ask for better care of my child.

No matter where he is, my love will surround him.

And will surround all those who have past along his

side, on September 11. 2001.

God Bless Us All.

Written By:

                    DonnaLe

Copyright 2000-2001

In Memory of my Son Tony Lee Qaks 10/04/79 to 09/11/2001.

I feel I must add this here, not all of us received funding from the disaster of 911,
my family did not, and at the writing of this piece my son is still missing, somewhere under all the debry.
I await for his ashes to come to us, so I can bury him properly.