I'm so goth I use black cotton balls.
I'm so goth I dyed my shadow black.
I'm so goth I dyed my belly button black.
I'm so goth my pupils are black.
I'm so goth my black is blacker than your black. I call it "black black."
I'm so goth, whenever I walk into a room, all the lights go out.
I'm so goth the people in the grocery store have refused to sell me any cereal other than Count Chocula.
I'm so goth people ask me to AUTOGRAPH boxes of Count Chocula.
I'm so goth people touch me and they BECOME goth. They say, "Oh no, now I'm goth!"
I'm so goth I wear sunglasses when I open the refrigerator.
I'm so goth I don't paint my nails black--I bash them with a hammer.
I'm so goth I died and didn't notice.
I'm so goth, whenever I knock on somebody's door they give me candy.
I'm so goth I write everything on black paper with a black pen in the dark and can never read what the hell I've written!
I'm so goth, I'm not only "goth," but also "gothe" "goff" "gawth" "gauwth" "gothic" "gothik" "gothique" and "gawfickk" and soon I hope to be"gauewthickueu."
I'm so goth I make Richard Simmons sad.
I'm so goth I steal your Happy Meal.
I'm so goth I offered to sell my soul to the devil and he wouldn't take it!
I'm so goth, when I stop pouting, people ask, "What are YOU so happy about?"
I'm so goth, when I go outside, the sun sets
. I'm so goth the smile muscles in my face have atrophied.
I'm so goth the smile muscles in my face never GREW.
What's a smile?
I'm so goth, when I was born, the doctor asked me, "What's with the shades?"
I'm so goth I say things like "eternally yours in darkness" and "love and darkness" and "may the eternal darkness of the abyss enrapture and enshroud you in its infernal sickly sweet embrace."
I'm so goth I'm a mime.
I'm so goth I don't use fabric softener, because I like pain.
I'm so goth I'm shocked by heterosexuality.
I'm so goth I set off airport metal detectors from ten feet away with all my jewelry.
I'm so goth I'm the only REAL goth.
I'm so goth I killed myself . . . twice.
I'm so goth a little rain cloud follows me wherever I go and rains on me.
I'm so goth I AM the rain cloud.
I'm so goth I'm more goth than anyone else.
I'm so goth I AM a tattoo.
I'm so goth I got my mom pierced.
I'm so goth I pierced all my tattoos.
I'm so goth it takes me an hour and a half to get dressed.
I'm so goth it takes me longer to get UNdressed.
I'm so goth I'm dead.
I'm so goth I think electrical tape is a fashion accessory.
I'm so goth I carry black food dye around in case I have to eat anything that's not black.
I'm so goth I look like Michael Jackson.
I'm so goth, in preschool, all my drawings were titled, "DEATH."
I'm so goth, in high school, all my papers were titled, "DEATH."
I'm so goth, as soon as I was born I put eyeliner on. And I put on too much.
I'm so goth I slather on spf 45 before I open the refrigerator.
I'm so goth I think Jesus might have been a vampire.
I'm so goth I wore corsets in preschool.
I'm so goth I wonder if my dog's collar would look better on me.
I'm so goth I KNOW my dog's collar looks better on me.
I'm so goth I stole my dog's collar.
I'm so goth I ate a Happy Meal . . . because I like to live dangerously.
I'm so goth little kids are mesmerized by my appearance.
I'm so goth parents leg their kids when they see them mesmerized by my appearance.
I'me soe gothe ie thinke puttinge e'se one thee endse ofe mye wordse ise medaevale ande deepe.
I'm so goth I've been banned.
I'm so goth nobody understands me, especially when I say, "the boom boom ike shockalocka!!! . . . flibbaflobba!!!"
I'm so goth I don't take my medications, so I can be more goth.
I'm so goth, when I was born the doctor slapped me and I didn't cry.
I'm so goth I make flowers wilt.
I'm so goth I like them better that way.
I'm so goth I punched a care bear.
I'm so goth I think saying "oh my goth" is cute.
I'm so goth, when I smile people ask me what's wrong.
I'm so goth little old ladies in walkers cross the street to insult me.
I'm so goth I practice my blank stare in the mirror.
I'm so goth I tried to be a hippie once and hugged a tree--and it died.
I'm so goth that when I moved into Mr. Roger's neighborhood, he moved away!
I'm so goth I pierced both my nipples--does that shock you?--then I went to the genetic engineering lab and had my genetic structure altered to grow another nipple, then I had THAT one pierced.
I'm so goth I have carpal tunnel syndrome from constantly putting the back of my hand to my forehead.
I'm so goth I listen to The Sisters of Mercy and Bauhaus simultaneously at midnight in a graveyard sitting in a pentagram surrounded by candles . . . and oh, there's a full moon . . . and then I die. And then I come back to life. And then I die again . . . tragically.
I'm so goth I have actually seriously uttered the phrase, "the darkest dark of the dark darkness."
I'm so goth, when I'm sleeping people come and check my pulse.
I'm so goth I don't have a pulse.
I'm so goth the people at the suicide hotline have asked me to stop calling.
I'm so goth I'm catholic.
I'm so goth nuns and priests resent me because I look cooler in black than them.
I'm so goth I changed my name to Mystryss Darque Wintyr Nyght Rayn Ravyn.
I'm so goth I don't have a name. I'm just "goth."
I'm so goth all I do is sit around and talk about how goth I am.
I'm so goth I always use the word "goth" instead of "got."
I'm so goth every sentence I say has the word "goth" in it.
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