Mortimer smoothed out the map. It was of the Quebec area. "Since the passage
east--toward the Atlantic Ocean--is blockaded, it would make sense that
Maelstrom and Lee are heading westward, to the St. Louis Lake."

"We have to get there fast," Ivy remarked. "If they reach the lake, we're
done for."

Carmen picked up the radio. "I'm calling the River Patrol, the Coast Guard,
and the federal police and sending them to the lake."

By the time Carmen and her allies had arrived at the lake, Lee and Maelstrom
were in custody.

Maelstrom looked angry. "This is your fault. If you had gotten your
coordinates straight--"

"Me? It was you!" Lee retorted. "If you weren't so reckless--"

The two villains were led away, still arguing.

Eagle Eye howled. "Nooo! Of I go to jail, I'll never get this stupid glaucoma
treated. I'M GOING BLIND AND NOBODY CARES!

"We're going to prison and all you can think about is your eyesight?" Bilge
grumbled. "The plan was perfect."

"Then why are we in handcuffs?" Eagle Eye asked.

"Because you're an idiot!"

"Remember, Bilge. The boss told you to speak in 'I' messages."

"Oh, sorry." Bilge amended. "I think you're an idiot! Better?"

Maelstrom's order could be heard from the paddy wagon: "Stop arguing, or I'll
arrange for conflict resolution classes to be held in your jail cell!"

"You have to feel sorry for those two," Carmen commented.

"Why?" Zack asked. "You constantly have to break up fights with Moe and
Lars."

"True, but I don't give Moe and Lars conflict resolution courses."

"Mediation actually does ease tension." Zack reported.

Ivy stared at him. "How do you know that?"

Zack grinned smugly. "I've been going to night school. The advanced
skateboarding class was full, so I took Psych 101 instead."

Ivy changed the subject. "Mortimer, I'll give you five names and I bet you
can't identify them: Billy Davis Junior, Lamont McLemore, Ron Townson,
Florence Gordon, and Marilyn McCoo."

Mortimer looked at her. "Those were the five members of the Fifth Dimension."

Ivy frowned. "You drive me crazy!"

Zack sighed. "Ivy, that really wasn't fair. I don't think the Music History
professors could know that. Isn't that right, Carmen? Carmen? Where'd she
go?"

"She must have escaped. Again!" Ivy surmised. "Well, she'll be back to steal
again soon. Let's go home."

A few hours later, Mortimer walked down the streets of San Francisco. He
entered the graveyard, where his parents were buried. They had died years ago
in a gas explosion. They were buried in adjacent graves. Mortimer hadn't
forgotten where. He flung himself down and began to weep.

A voice interrupted his thoughts: "Are you all right?"

Mortimer looked up. The speaker was Carmen, back in trenchcoat.

"Carmen? What are you doing here?"

Carmen only said softly, "Mortimer, all you need is some guidance."

"Carmen, I'm sorry, but I can't defect."

"You don't have to. But I think you should know you would have been a great
thief. But, you'd make a good detective as well. As for your colleague, well,
Ivy will definitely hurt you if you let her. But don't let her." With this,
she slipped into the shadows and was gone.

Mortimer got up and walked back to Acme. Somehow he felt better. He stepped
into the control room. Zack and Ivy were still there playing cards.

Mortimer looked up. "Chief, please don't fire me. Where would I go?"

"Get back to where you once belonged?" Ivy suggested.

Mortimer ignored her.

"Fire you?" the Chief repeated. "Why would I do that? You've been a great
help! If it hadn't been for you, we wouldn't be here having this
conversation."

Mortimer looked relieved. "Thank you, Chief." He left the room.

Zack put down his cards. "You know, Ivy, maybe Mortimer isn't so bad after
all."

Ivy shrugged. "You may be right. Maybe I overdid the teasing a bit."

Zack looked surprised. "A bit? Understatement of the Year."

Ivy sighed. "Maybe I will go easier. Come on, Zack. Let's go home."

To be continued....